Worst takeaway meal you've ever eaten?

jippo nolan · 23-02-2021 9:14pm

10pennymixup wrote: »

We moved to a new house in a new town. The first night in, tired from the move, cleaning etc we ordered a Chinese. I asked for a chicken and mushroom with fried rice.

That's exactly what I got. A tray containing pieces of chicken and some mushrooms, absolutely nothing else. No sign of a pepper or an onion, not even a sauce.

Good name for the business though. It was called Soon Fatt. Didn't get too fat that night though.

Monasterevan?

jackboy · 23-02-2021 9:15pm

Chernobyl Joes chipper van, near the Hurlers, Castletroy in the 1990’s. Notorious.

igCorcaigh · 23-02-2021 9:15pm

Soon Fatt. I love it.

The Indian/kebab/chipper near me is called Fat Belly.

Maybe in Asia, there is a certain attraction to being well fed, but the marketing just doesn't translate to over here, does it.

suicide_circus · 23-02-2021 10:05pm

Got orange duck from a chinese a while back. Completely inedible and i was starving. I even tried washing the sauce off the duck. I felt ashamed.

barbara anne · 23-02-2021 10:06pm

suicide_circus wrote: »

Got orange duck from a chinese a while back. Completely inedible and i was starving. I even tried washing the sauce off the duck. I felt ashamed.

You really shouldn't be ashamed of things like that.

All you did was try to make it more edible. I would have done the same in your situation.

suicide_circus · 23-02-2021 10:08pm

barbara anne wrote: »

You really shouldn't be ashamed of things like that.

All you did was try to make it more edible. I would have done the same in your situation.

I washed it by bringing it into the shower with me

Carfacemandog · 23-02-2021 10:16pm

Yurt! wrote: »

Dominos is sh*te. It's shocking expensive as well.

Aussies and yanks I've met find the cost of dominos in Ireland absolutely hilarious. It's the cheap muck of takeaway in most other places that competes on low cost, yet over here it's charged like some kind of premium product.

Probably explains why their shop in Tallaght is one of their most profitable in the world.

23-02-2021 10:22pm

Cheating with this one, but walking back to the hotel one Sunday morning in while on holliers and we just missed McDonald's. Fella told us there was a load of vending machines around the corner. We walked past and they had rustlers style microwaveable burgers. You press a button and 3 mins later a burger pops out. The beef one was rank, the chicken one was actually edible.

However, a €3 microwaved donor kebab from a vending machine in Albufeira at 5.30am sounds exactly as bad as it tasted.

jay0109 · 23-02-2021 10:23pm

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Mushrooms on a burger? .......... By god i'm actually shaking with anger. Anger and disgust. And a small bit of curiosity that sickens me.

Seriously though that's actually perverse.

They put beetroot and pineapple on the 'aussie burger' in Australia. I refused to try it which was a bit stupid of me considering I like pineapple on a pizza!

barbara anne · 23-02-2021 10:24pm

suicide_circus wrote: »

I washed it by bringing it into the shower with me

Oh well then you should be ashamed lol

fonecrusher1 · 23-02-2021 10:30pm

jay0109 wrote: »

They put beetroot and pineapple on the 'aussie burger' in Australia.

Withdraw this blasphemy at once. At once I say!

D'only ting that should be on a burger is red sauce. Not ketchup. Specifically red sauce. Its very similar to ketchup but with no natural ingredients whatsoever and a shelf life of approximately 2000 years.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater · 23-02-2021 10:34pm

Carfacemandog wrote: »

Aussies and yanks I've met find the cost of dominos in Ireland absolutely hilarious. It's the cheap muck of takeaway in most other places that competes on low cost, yet over here it's charged like some kind of premium product.

Probably explains why their shop in Tallaght is one of their most profitable in the world.

Absolute fact. It's the cheapest of the cheap here in New Zealand, the Kiwis won't even look at it for the most part, it's the pizza of the budget conscious here. Pizza from the 'value range' is $5 (€3).

jay0109 · 23-02-2021 10:34pm

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Withdraw this blasphemy at once. At once I say!

D'only ting that should be on a burger is red sauce. Not ketchup. Specifically red sauce. Its very similar to ketchup but with no natural ingredients whatsoever and a shelf life of approximately 2000 years.

Chef Red Sauce only

Porklife · 24-02-2021 12:17am

suicide_circus wrote: »

I washed it by bringing it into the shower with me

I once gave some pork ribs a bubble bath

Muahahaha · 24-02-2021 1:30am

Yurt! wrote: »

On the other side of the coin, there's an Indian take-away at the top of Smithfield square near the Cobblestone pub that looks like it should be shut down on sight by health inspectors. Mind-blowingly good curry though - best I've had in Ireland.

That Indian in Smithfield was shut down for a couple of days by the FSAI a few years back. Not sure if it is still there but at the time everyone was shocked as it put out some great food.

As for KFCs here, they always appear very badly run. Ive passed the one in Blanch and there is actual smells of filthy oil coming from their ventilation systems and stinking up the whole area around it. Also their chip portions must be the smallest of anywhere, I once counted 16 chips in their tiny bags which is a joke. KFCs in the UK seem to be a lot busier than here and generally better run.

I dont think theres any chain takeaway in Ireland doing really great fried chicken. Supermacs and Italian chippers are often very greasy. Mad Egg near the opposite the Bleeding Horse on Camden St do great fried chicken but theyve only the one location in Dublin.

GT89 · 24-02-2021 1:36am

Apache is absolute crap the one near me used to be a Chinese and an Apache rolled into one the Chinese was just your bog standard Chinese but the pizza was absolute crap.

Also my local chipper changed to a Romayo's a couple of years ago had it once and let us say I will not be returning. Which is a pity as it was a relatively decent chipper when it was an independent Italian chipper. Notice a lot of Italian chippers have been replaced by chains like Romayo's and San Marino in recent years.

24-02-2021 1:37am

KFC in Ireland is manky. Expensive with piss-poor portions to boot.

Never thought I'd say it but the quality of KFC in America is far superior.

Not even while full up with drink would I darken their door again.

Rodney Bathgate · 24-02-2021 1:41am

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

Withdraw this blasphemy at once. At once I say!

D'only ting that should be on a burger is red sauce. Not ketchup. Specifically red sauce. Its very similar to ketchup but with no natural ingredients whatsoever and a shelf life of approximately 2000 years.

What about catsup?

Akrasia · 24-02-2021 1:50am

Ennis Top Pizza
Got it last week cause it was kinda nice the last time I ordered from there

Ordered a couple of pizzas, both were burnt, chips were stale, garlic bread tasted only of grease. Delivery driver forgot the drinks

Not recommended and not even cheap to make up for the disappointment

Character Building · 24-02-2021 1:55am

Chicken Hut is absolutely manky. Had it once from clanbrassil Street. They have a few branches around the country and by all accounts their shop in Mullingar is notoriously bad.

Aceandstuff · 24-02-2021 4:34am

Character Building wrote: »

Chicken Hut is absolutely manky. Had it once from clanbrassil Street. They have a few branches around the country and by all accounts their shop in Mullingar is notoriously bad.

Their chips were always bad, but the fish and the chicken were decent at the beginning of last year. It has been deteriorating over time, so I don't order from them anymore. It's a pity, they were one of the only places with free delivery and the prices were good.

Sgt Hartman · 24-02-2021 7:29am

Muahahaha wrote: »

Mad Egg near the opposite the Bleeding Horse on Camden St do great fried chicken but theyve only the one location in Dublin.

Mad Egg opened up in the Italian Quarter where Pitt Bros used to be. Just hope it opens again after the lockdown. The sandwiches are quite good.

24-02-2021 7:44am

The green kitchen Walkinstown last Friday got a steak sandwich i was not a well man after it Friday night Saturday and Sunday.

fonecrusher1 · 24-02-2021 12:07pm

Pizza Hut. There was one in a shopping center near me but its long gone now because the food was so poor. I got a small pizza from them one day and it was like eating a cheap supermarket mini pizza that had been microwaved for 20 minutes. Never went back again.

Also I was in Australia many years ago and it was considered the slop of choice for the homeless because they had the all you can eat troughs.

Carfacemandog · 24-02-2021 12:29pm

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater wrote: »

Absolute fact. It's the cheapest of the cheap here in New Zealand, the Kiwis won't even look at it for the most part, it's the pizza of the budget conscious here. Pizza from the 'value range' is $5 (€3).

I did a year in Australia about a decade back and it was the same there, I have a vague memory of $4 on Tuesdays and Thursdays for a 12 inch one. Which is grand for when you're tight for cash and not bothered cooking, fills a nice gap in the market.

But in Ireland it's a joke, kind of like seeing a big Mac (just the burger, not the meal) being sold for €25 and going out the door by the bucket load as some kind of premium product.

---

Worst takeaway ever got was a place in Canada. Order was all wrong and half missing, pizza looked like someone had vomited on it and literally had no sauce, chips were uncooked, onion rings had uncooked batter on them and the chicken wings had... 2 wings. Each of which were like rubber. Delivery from 2km up the road took 2hrs and the place refused to do anything about it. My room mate at the time and I decided to do it for them - took all the food, carried it over to the place, and threw it on their floor face down before walking out.

fryup · 24-02-2021 12:32pm

Carfacemandog wrote: »

I did a year in Australia about a decade back and it was the same there.

well then you must have experienced the culinary delights of....

Chicken Treat and Red Rooster and Hungry Jacks

they sure do love there fast food down under

24-02-2021 12:37pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Probably showing my age a bit here but there was a "chain" of three take aways in Dublin some time ago. Dundrum Drumcondra and Raheny if my memory is working. Called "Some Like it Hot".

They could consistently produce some of the worst approximations of food I have ever had in my life. While Abrakebabra can produce some awful things - and that "Eddies" thing that is not really Eddie rockets but produces half the portion sized for three times the price is truely the most current awful thing I know of - none will ever reach the horror of "Some like it hot" for me.

I used go to the one in Dundrum after Happy Hour in the Zoo Bar in town and get one of the kebabs they had every other weekend. I remember liking it though for some reason.

forzacalcio · 24-02-2021 12:42pm

About 15 years ago there was a burger van outside coppers, after a night out and a feed of drink I grabbed a burger from here. He handed it over without one of those "burger bags". I asked him for a bag, he handed me a Tesco bag. I ate half of it, brought the other half back to the hotel to eat when I got back and fell asleep. Woke up 6 hours later and the burger on my pillow and it was horrendous. God knows what I caught from that burger that night.

fatbhoy · 24-02-2021 12:56pm

OicheMhaira wrote: »

Deep Fried Curly Wurly in Edinbugh - in garlic and beer batter for added unpleasantness.

Kind of similar: deep fried Mars bar in Edinburgh, £5, tiny, and batter/oil tasted of fish. Weirdly nice and not nice at the same time. Total tourist rip-off.

smilerf · 24-02-2021 1:07pm

I don't know if it's still there but in the early noughties there was a place next to the savoy cinema
It was vulgar

For Forks Sake · 24-02-2021 1:08pm

jay0109 wrote: »

Chef Red Sauce only

This is the stuff, barely meets any qualifying descriptions to be called "food" but does the trick out of a chipper. It's about 86% vinegar, 13% sugar, 1% tomato

smilerf · 24-02-2021 1:08pm

Aaron's in kilsheelan is disgusting but everyone raves about it

Lollipops23 · 24-02-2021 1:50pm

Muahahaha wrote: »

That Indian in Smithfield was shut down for a couple of days by the FSAI a few years back. Not sure if it is still there but at the time everyone was shocked as it put out some great food.

Namaste- it's probably the nicest Indian I've ever had. Defo looks dodgy from the outside, but the grub is immense.

Larbre34 · 24-02-2021 3:01pm

What wouldn't you have mushroom on a burger?

BKs Mushroom Double-Swiss is one of the nicest fast food burgers ever.

Muahahaha · 24-02-2021 3:14pm

Sgt Hartman wrote: »

Mad Egg opened up in the Italian Quarter where Pitt Bros used to be. Just hope it opens again after the lockdown. The sandwiches are quite good.

Thats good to hear Mad Egg opened up there, I didnt even know Pitt Bros had shut down. Mad Eggs chicken burgers are excellent. Even better again is Chimac on Aungier Street, they do South Korean fried chicken burgers which are divine.

Lollipops23 wrote: »

Namaste- it's probably the nicest Indian I've ever had. Defo looks dodgy from the outside, but the grub is immense.

yeah thats the one, loads of people rave on about how good it is but Ive never tried it myself.

Not a takeaway but the Indian food in Pickle on Camden St is top drawer, man I miss eating out in that place.

wrmwit · 24-02-2021 5:34pm

Lollipops23 wrote: »

Namaste- it's probably the nicest Indian I've ever had. Defo looks dodgy from the outside, but the grub is immense.

When I lived in Dublin years ago I used to regularly get take aways from Namaste in Smithfield. Immense grub indeed but the place inside and outside was a kip!

fryup · 24-02-2021 5:45pm

i'm just wondering....are some of the posts libelous?

smilerf · 24-02-2021 6:11pm

I doubt it they are opinions
No different than saying I like red

fryup · 24-02-2021 6:15pm

ya but if you publicly say i got food poisoning from such & such a place...is that not slander?

certainly won't help business

not yet · 24-02-2021 6:53pm

A U2 concert in 85 I think, way up high in the stands. Burger bar at the hill 16 end of the pitch, took me 30 min to get through the crowds and top of the Q, made my way back with 2 juicy 1/4 pounders, girlfriend thought I was a hero...

Opened them up and nothing but empty buns in the box, no sauce, no onions, nothing, still wake up in a sweat to this day.

RandomViewer · 24-02-2021 7:02pm

For Forks Sake wrote: »

This is the stuff, barely meets any qualifying descriptions to be called "food" but does the trick out of a chipper. It's about 86% vinegar, 13% sugar, 1% tomato

Used to be packed in Ballybofey, Donegal, m I x depended on who was mixing it

Crocodile Booze · 24-02-2021 8:20pm

not yet wrote: »

A U2 concert in 85 I think, way up high in the stands. Burger bar at the hill 16 end of the pitch, took me 30 min to get through the crowds and top of the Q, made my way back with 2 juicy 1/4 pounders, girlfriend thought I was a hero...

Opened them up and nothing but empty buns in the box, no sauce, no onions, nothing, still wake up in a sweat to this day.

Vegetarian burger? Did the server offer you a burger With or Without Ewe?

Skodafan · 24-02-2021 9:20pm

Had subway while in Algeria before and it was horrific, I was starving and was very hungry. It looked the same as home but by jolly it didn't taste the same

FarCanal · 24-02-2021 10:37pm

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

I give you Blue Thunder in Mayo.

Ah now, cant agree with that. The place in Castlebar is decent.
The one in Westport aint bad either.

Church on Tuesday · 24-02-2021 11:30pm

FarCanal wrote: »

Ah now, cant agree with that. The place in Castlebar is decent.
The one in Westport aint bad either.

They are both god damn awful. Easily some of the worst fast food food I have had. Chips are basically inedible.

Claremorris branch is half decent.

kegg · 25-02-2021 4:47am

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

They are both god damn awful. Easily some of the worst fast food food I have had. Chips are basically inedible.

Claremorris branch is half decent.

If you got food in one and found it awful,
why did you bother going to the other?

Fitz* · 25-02-2021 5:44am

Had some bad one off experiences in plenty of places around the country.

But the worst has to a street food vendor that served chicken noodles. I was served an actual fried chicken heart. I could see the aortas and all. Put me right off eating any more of the dish.

bassy · 25-02-2021 6:35am

FarCanal wrote: »

Ah now, cant agree with that. The place in Castlebar is decent.
The one in Westport aint bad either.

How about swinford one

Tork · 25-02-2021 6:52am

Got fish and chips in Duncannon about 10 years ago and binned most of it. I think its biggest problem was that they'd been cooked in oil that wasn't hot enough and it was just a soggy, inedible mess.

Wanderer78 · 25-02-2021 7:48am

Fitz* wrote:

But the worst has to a street food vendor that served chicken noodles. I was served an actual fried chicken heart. I could see the aortas and all. Put me right off eating any more of the dish.

Had a chap offer me fried locusts in loas, I declined, a person in our group was served a 'full chicken' in a local restaurant, feet, head, everything, was offered to try, but I happily declined, I didn't ask what my dish was, I just eat it, as I was starving

Worst takeaway meal you've ever eaten?

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