Baby On Board

Fighting Tao · 25-01-2018 7:47pm

Bitches Be Trypsin wrote: »

People are generally offended when posters are as rude and offensive as you come across.

Nope. People are generally offended by what they choose to be offended by.

iamwhoiam · 25-01-2018 7:49pm

I must say the only time I really needed to sit down I politely asked a young person and explained I couldn't stand . The person was polite and kind and stood up without a fuss .

EPAndlee · 25-01-2018 7:54pm

I wouldn't give up my seat for anyone

eviltwin · 25-01-2018 7:56pm

splinter65 wrote: »

If anything sums up the pathetic state of modern feminism it is this sad little badge which you must wear if you want someone to let you sit on public transport if you are pregnant.
Because now that we’ve insisted that we want to be treated no different to men, and men have been beaten into submission and are taking our concerns on board (hurrah) we find that we actually do want to be treated differently.
And instead of just accepting that there were going to be some drawbacks in this brave new world, some women are going to ask for special treatment by wearing a badge like a small child at a birthday party.
It’s an absolute joke.

There is no connection to feminism here, it's simply recognising that sometimes people find themselves in a position where they need a seat, could be a man, woman or child.

No one should have to wear a badge but its a sign of the world we live in where manners and respect are gone and people only care about themselves.

It's quite sad really. I hope that the children I'm raising will be able to see beyond their own needs to offer their seats to someone in need.

Trekker09 · 25-01-2018 7:58pm

EPAndlee wrote: »

I wouldn't give up my seat for anyone

Are you Bertie Aherne?

Third_Echelon · 25-01-2018 8:02pm

Rhyme wrote: »

Something related became an issue in London's system. Ken Livingstone (I think) who was the mayor then said that some of the families of pregnant women would take the badges once the baby was born and use it.

He was on 'Have I Got News For You' and talked about it and how as a long-term scheme, it was flawed. That it was supposed to create the mindset of giving up seats so that once the badges would leave the system (being lost, binned, damaged etc) that London commuters would give up their seats as a matter of course.

I don't know how that all panned out in the end.

_Dara_ wrote: »

I'm not sure. I mean, it's a badge. Anyone who wears one whilst not pregnant - what a fucking loser.

I guess there will be (or should be) something along the lines of 'Due in April 2018' on the badge as well?!

Trekker09 · 25-01-2018 8:05pm

I guess the main reason why I started this thread is because I personally don't think it's a gender issue, but a manners issue. I'm a bit disturbed by some of the responses, a lot of "I'm all right Jack" attitude.

I give up seats, hold doors open etc not because it's gentlemanly or chivalrous, but simply I think it's the right thing to do in the given situation.

Lia_lia · 25-01-2018 8:10pm

Wow. Can’t believe some of the responses in this thread. I think the badges are a great idea. I rarely use public transport anymore but when I did I always gave up me seat for elderly/disabled/pregnant people. The badges are a good idea though as sometimes it’s hard to know if someone is pregnant or not.

It was mentioned already but the stories you hear about maternity hospital waiting rooms are shocking. A colleague of mine is pregnant and she said the same thing about the maternity hospital in Cork. Men sitting in seats and not giving them up for heavily pregnant women. And the midwifes having to tell them to get up. What is wrong with these people?

25-01-2018 8:26pm

Only one solution

Pregnant women pay extra, get priority

_Dara_ · 25-01-2018 8:28pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Only one solution

Pregnant women pay extra, get priority

You’re just so badass.

25-01-2018 8:30pm

_Dara_ wrote: »

You’re just so badass.

Still struggling with not making threads your own personal fiefdom I see

LirW · 25-01-2018 8:39pm

All the keyboards warriors here (MUH SEAT!!!) , your mothers would be so proud of you.

_Dara_ · 25-01-2018 8:44pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Still struggling with not making threads your own personal fiefdom I see

You’re just so badass.

LirW wrote: »

All the keyboards warriors here (MUH SEAT!!!) , your mothers would be so proud of you.

Ah sure, look, we all know they’re full of it.

Buford T. Justice XIX · 25-01-2018 8:45pm

El Weirdo wrote: »

Fucking hell, I see this thread has brought all the cunts out.

Mod note: El Weirdo, don't post in this thread again.

Buford T. Justice

currants · 25-01-2018 8:46pm

LirW wrote: »

All the keyboards warriors here (MUH SEAT!!!) , your mothers would be so proud of you.

and those self same keyboard warriors may one day be old and frail and praying that the babies these women are carrying will just let them sit down before they fall down on the bus.train they are taking to collect the pension those babies will be paying for. circle of life innit?

ceadaoin. · 25-01-2018 8:49pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Only one solution

Pregnant women pay extra, get priority

Or people who don't want to give up their seat pay extra for assigned seating...

the_pen_turner · 25-01-2018 8:52pm

the real issue is that the companies are not providing enough seating. surely another few carriages would solve all these problems. we are paying enough for the train we should have plenty of spare seating

splinter65 · 25-01-2018 9:03pm

ceadaoin. wrote: »

Or people who don't want to give up their seat pay extra for assigned seating...

Since when is sitting on a seat you’ve paid for “assigned seating”?!?

eviltwin · 25-01-2018 9:05pm

splinter65 wrote: »

Since when is sitting on a seat you’ve paid for “assigned seating”?!?

You pay for a journey, you can't always be guaranteed a seat

ceadaoin. · 25-01-2018 9:25pm

splinter65 wrote: »

Since when is sitting on a seat you’ve paid for “assigned seating”?!?

You're not paying for the seat. Clearly not seeing as there are often people standing. You're paying to get from a to b. My response was to the poster suggesting that pregnant women pay extra. If a person doesn't want to ever have to offer their seat out of courtesy to anyone then maybe they should be the ones to pay extra for the privilege

Bambi985 · 25-01-2018 10:22pm

LOL at all the man-children fighting against the big bad feminazis who are trying to marginalise the male species with their baby-making, seat-demanding ways. You show those bItches who's boss! You sit there stubbornly and pretend to be immersed in your phone or newspaper with your headphones in pretending not to see the heavily pregnant woman right in front of you and enjoy that lovely ten minutes of sitting down, on your way to an office where you'll be sitting down for 8+ more hours anyway.

See these types on the London tube all day every day, the signs of "I'm not noticing this 8 month pregnant woman at all, I'm staring out the window not noticing a thing at all at all" are so glaringly obvious. And women can be just as bad IME, particularly middle-aged, professional looking women. Zero fcuks given about anyone else except themselves and THEIR seat that they will literally clamber over dead bodies to get to when someone sudddenly gets off at a stop.

Morto for every single one of them. Fcuking plebs.

PandaPoo · 25-01-2018 10:37pm

After having SPD on both my pregnancies I would always give my seat to a pregnant woman. I would anyway, but especially now. Jesus the pain of having your pelvis separate is horrific, I was on crutches at 7 months pregnant with a massive bump, on the luas to my physio appointment and nobody offered me a seat. I almost passed out too, I was just so dizzy all of a sudden. I still was too shy to ask for a seat. I just got off at the next stop instead and got the next one

I'll always give up a seat to someone I see who seems to be struggling. If someone asked for my seat I would give it up, they wouldn't ask if they didn't need it and they could have a number of hidden disabilities.

My 7 year old knows he has to stand on public transport if someone needs his seat, he has cerebral palsy so sometimes he needs to sit, and people look disgusted. I love when they say something to me so I can tell them where to shove their opinion.

Stheno · 25-01-2018 10:40pm

I fractured my hip about twelve years ago and in six weeks of being on crutches was never offered a seat on public transport

25-01-2018 11:00pm

Bambi985 wrote: »

LOL at all the man-children fighting against the big bad feminazis who are trying to marginalise the male species with their baby-making, seat-demanding ways. You show those bItches who's boss! You sit there stubbornly and pretend to be immersed in your phone or newspaper with your headphones in pretending not to see the heavily pregnant woman right in front of you and enjoy that lovely ten minutes of sitting down, on your way to an office where you'll be sitting down for 8+ more hours anyway.

See these types on the London tube all day every day, the signs of "I'm not noticing this 8 month pregnant woman at all, I'm staring out the window not noticing a thing at all at all" are so glaringly obvious. And women can be just as bad IME, particularly middle-aged, professional looking women. Zero fcuks given about anyone else except themselves and THEIR seat that they will literally clamber over dead bodies to get to when someone sudddenly gets off at a stop.

Morto for every single one of them. Fcuking plebs.

Now I'm only asking but

Do you think perhaps you are bringing some of your own issues to this matter

wakka12 · 25-01-2018 11:05pm

Why does anyone give any airtime to these bull**** media things who are just trying to get attention
Im a young man and I don't know of any female my age who would ever expect another man to give up their seat for them. I would give up my seat for a pregnant woman, disabled, very elderly, or a woman with young child who she can put on her lap and any girl my age I know would do the same

yesto24 · 25-01-2018 11:16pm

Haven't read all posts but my thinking is if you need a seat ask someone for it. They may not give you the seat but that's a different discussion.
I told my wife to say this when she was pregnant.
As for Newstalk, it pissed me off when they said about men offering their seat. It should be all able bodied people offering a seat to people who need it.
But I would have a problem giving up me seat to a fat person who needs it (for clarity the person is disabled because they are fat not fat because they are disabled).

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 12:07am

eviltwin wrote: »

You pay for a journey, you can't always be guaranteed a seat

No you most certainly can’t, but once your in a seat your perfectly entitled to remain in it until your journey is over.

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 12:14am

ceadaoin. wrote: »

You're not paying for the seat. Clearly not seeing as there are often people standing. You're paying to get from a to b. My response was to the poster suggesting that pregnant women pay extra. If a person doesn't want to ever have to offer their seat out of courtesy to anyone then maybe they should be the ones to pay extra for the privilege

It’s not a privilege to get seated on public transport.
Where do you get that from?
It you want to be garaunteed a seat for any reason at all you should have to pay extra to sit in the allocated seating.
I think this is a great idea.

eviltwin · 26-01-2018 12:17am

splinter65 wrote: »

No you most certainly can’t, but once your in a seat your perfectly entitled to remain in it until your journey is over.

Absolutely but its good manners and just being a good human person to look out for those who might need the seat more than you.

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 12:29am

eviltwin wrote: »

Absolutely but its good manners and just being a good human person to look out for those who might need the seat more than you.

Of course it is good manners, in Ireland and other European countries.
And traditionally in western 1st world countries on public transport able bodied people have offered seats to a selection of people they instinctively know deserve to sit .
But this is not necessarily traditional in other cultures and part of becoming a diverse multicultural country is accepting that some of our “manners” are not practiced at all in huge swathes of the world and that’s all there is to it.
Add to that recent feminazi complaints about not wanting doors held open or chairs pulled out and a lot of resentment from childless women directed towards pregnant colleagues and it all adds up.

eviltwin · 26-01-2018 12:36am

splinter65 wrote: »

Of course it is good manners, in Ireland and other European countries.
And traditionally in western 1st world countries on public transport able bodied people have offered seats to a selection of people they instinctively know deserve to sit .
But this is not necessarily traditional in other cultures and part of becoming a diverse multicultural country is accepting that some of our “manners” are not practiced at all in huge swathes of the world and that’s all there is to it.
Add to that recent feminazi complaints about not wanting doors held open or chairs pulled out and a lot of resentment from childless women directed towards pregnant colleagues and it all adds up.

I don't really understand why a childless woman would resent her pregnant colleagues or why she would then use that to justify being unhelpful.

Look the way I see it you are either a decent person or your not. Refusing a seat to someone in need because you got it first is a **** thing to do.

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 12:51am

eviltwin wrote: »

I don't really understand why a childless woman would resent her pregnant colleagues or why she would then use that to justify being unhelpful.

Look the way I see it you are either a decent person or your not. Refusing a seat to someone in need because you got it first is a **** thing to do.

There’s mounting resentment in the workplace in childless women who find themselves being asked to do extra often unpaid work as their female colleagues who are parents/pregnant exercise they’re parental/maternal rights.

https://www.google.com/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/women/work/childless-women-should-get-maternity-leave-too/amp/

eviltwin · 26-01-2018 12:54am

splinter65 wrote: »

There’s mounting resentment in the workplace in childless women who find themselves being asked to do extra often unpaid work as their female colleagues who are parents/pregnant exercise they’re parental/maternal rights.

https://www.google.com/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/women/work/childless-women-should-get-maternity-leave-too/amp/

And this is why you wont give a pregnant lady your seat?

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 12:56am

eviltwin wrote: »

And this is why you wont give a pregnant lady your seat?

Which post did I say I wouldn’t give a pregnant lady my seat?!?

smurgen · 26-01-2018 1:04am

Had an awkward situation once where a heavily pregnant woman was standing next to me on a dart and i offered her my seat but she declined politely saying she'd rather stand as sitting was uncomfortable.i got dirty looks off some of the passangers hopping on and off thinking i was a horrible ****er making her stand ðŸ˜

ceadaoin. · 26-01-2018 1:28am

splinter65 wrote: »

There’s mounting resentment in the workplace in childless women who find themselves being asked to do extra often unpaid work as their female colleagues who are parents/pregnant exercise they’re parental/maternal rights.

https://www.google.com/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/women/work/childless-women-should-get-maternity-leave-too/amp/

So because someone is resentful of a pregnant colleague or one who is a parent they would refuse to give another completely unconnected pregnant lady a seat? Would anyone really be that petty?

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 1:38am

ceadaoin. wrote: »

So because someone is resentful of a pregnant colleague or one who is a parent they would refuse to give another completely unconnected pregnant lady a seat? Would anyone really be that petty?

There is no doubt in my mind that in Ireland there is generally less sympathy shown to, and less empathy with, pregnant women then there used to be for a number of reasons.
Times have changed.

ceadaoin. · 26-01-2018 1:57am

splinter65 wrote: »

There is no doubt in my mind that in Ireland there is generally less sympathy shown to, and less empathy with, pregnant women then there used to be for a number of reasons.
Times have changed.

And you sound delighted about it. Just wondering if the "mounting" workplace resentment also apply to fathers who take parental leave? Your posts only mention women for some reason

I don't live in Ireland so I don't know if what you say is true. It's certainly not something I've ever realised was a thing and I've never really paid much attention to how people react to pregnant women when I'm back home tbh.

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 1:59am

ceadaoin. wrote: »

Does the workplace resentment also apply to father's who take parental leave. Your posts only mention women for some reason

I sound delighted?
I’m not so sure about that now. I’m sure your opinion is entirely subjective.
You “ sound” very angry about something or other yourself though.
This thread is about “baby on board” that’s the reason I don’t mention any thing about fathers taking parental leave.
So you don’t have to wonder at all.
I’d say that would be an entirely different thread.

ceadaoin. · 26-01-2018 2:02am

splinter65 wrote: »

This thread is about “baby on board” that’s the reason I don’t mention any thing about fathers taking parental leave.
So you don’t have to wonder at all.
I’d say that would be an entirely different thread.

The thread is about seats on public transport, you brought up office politics and mentioned parental leave which is for both males and females. You only mentioned resentment towards women in the workplace though.

Trekker09 · 26-01-2018 8:46am

splinter65 wrote: »

There’s mounting resentment in the workplace in childless women who find themselves being asked to do extra often unpaid work as their female colleagues who are parents/pregnant exercise they’re parental/maternal rights.

https://www.google.com/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/women/work/childless-women-should-get-maternity-leave-too/amp/

Sorry but this is a load of crap! For one, why do you say childless women are picking up the slack? Surely male colleagues would be affected too.
Secondly, it's a massive adjustment when you become a parent. You can write off any personal time for the next few years. No heading home, feet up with a glass of vino and Peaky Blinders. It's straight into get ready for the immediate needs of the baby. When you finally get to put your feet up, it's time for bed, and a mostly sleep disturbed night, waking up shattered.
It really shouldn't be an 'us and them' situation, as we are products of parents, good or bad. Maternity leave isn't a holiday, and we're slowly, as a society, realizing this by acknowledging the role of both parents of a new born.

splinter65 · 26-01-2018 8:57am

Trekker09 wrote: »

Sorry but this is a load of crap! For one, why do you say childless women are picking up the slack? Surely male colleagues would be affected too.
Secondly, it's a massive adjustment when you become a parent. You can write off any personal time for the next few years. No heading home, feet up with a glass of vino and Peaky Blinders. It's straight into get ready for the immediate needs of the baby. When you finally get to put your feet up, it's time for bed, and a mostly sleep disturbed night, waking up shattered.
It really shouldn't be an 'us and them' situation, as we are products of parents, good or bad. Maternity leave isn't a holiday, and we're slowly, as a society, realizing this by acknowledging the role of both parents of a new born.

If you actually read the piece I linked you to, it’s a woman that is complaining, not a man.
Anything then you mention about not being able to go home from work and watch Peaky Blinders is absolute rubbish because if you decide to have a baby then you have accepted all that and that’s nothing to do with your colleagues, is it?

Dakota Dan · 26-01-2018 9:06am

Huntergonzo wrote: »

That's shocking to hear, any half decent person should offer up their seat to a pregnant woman, knowing this generation though they probably all have their heads stuck in their phones and they don't even realize you're there.

Pity you need the badge though, you shouldn't need that for people to recognise you, try leaving it behind, it obviously isn't working as it is.

What I find more shocking is that the woman has to work in her condition.

Dakota Dan · 26-01-2018 9:15am

meeeeh wrote: »

I remember we were taught as kids that it's good manners to give a seat to elderly and pregnant women. The only difference between now and 30 years ago is that people are heavier and sometimes you don't want to assume someone is pregnant. Badge solves those issues. It's common courtesy anyway, some in this thread just showed they have none.

:eek:

Dakota Dan · 26-01-2018 9:32am

pgj2015 wrote: »

if you bluntly asked me for my seat you wouldn't get it, just because you decided to have a child does not give you the right to force people to give up their seat, what if you bluntly told someone with a hidden disability you wanted their seat? someone with two prosthetic feet perhaps.

Shy retiring types me arse.

jooksavage · 26-01-2018 10:08am

Dakota Dan wrote: »

Shy retiring types me arse.

No, we are. But I started to feel ashamed at myself, watching my wife struggling to stand on a packed carriage and not doing anything about it. I was surprised at how pregnancy and parenthood affected me.

jooksavage · 26-01-2018 10:18am

pgj2015 wrote: »

if you bluntly asked me for my seat you wouldn't get it, just because you decided to have a child does not give you the right to force people to give up their seat, what if you bluntly told someone with a hidden disability you wanted their seat? someone with two prosthetic feet perhaps.

Don't worry, you wouldn't be bluntly asked unless you did the thing that really pissed her off: stare at the bump and then quickly look at your feet/your phone/out the window/in your bag for fear that you might be asked to vacate your seat. Those people are just asking for it. But, to their credit, every single one of them obliged.

c68zapdsm5i1ru · 26-01-2018 10:44am

Saruhashi wrote: »

Yes, and when I'm old and sick and I need a seat on the train or bus I will ask politely and if I get a "no" then I will ask the next person.

Instead of standing around wearing my pathetic little badge and hoping that someone will notice me.

You could have just said "excuse me, I'm struggling a bit here and I'm pregnant could I please take your seat". I reckon most people would be agreeable to that.

Depending on which door you use on the luas, and how busy it is there's a chance that you'd only even be spotted by a couple of people who are sitting in seats.

Most people I see on public transport have their attention on their phones or other distractions. What are you doing? Standing around waiting to be noticed?

Did you at least try to get attention? Do you sigh really loudly and talk to yourself saying "just me and my badge here, standing around all day, punished for the crime of having a child"? :pac:

If you ever asked me for my seat I'd gladly oblige. No problem whatsoever.

Otherwise, I'll be looking at my phone or reading my book, trying to avoid eye contact with the other passengers.

There's no point standing around hoping to be noticed and then giving out because nobody gave you a seat. You want a seat? Ask politely.

"Oh no but I might get a rude answer". Well, if proabbly less than 1% chance of a rude answer is enough to make you choose to endure extreme pain then that's on you too.

Maybe that's the problem. Would it kill you to glance around occasionally and see if somebody could do with your seat instead of forcing them to have to ask, uncertain as to whether they'll get an ungracious response or might inadvertently have asked someone who has a hidden disability, is not feeling terribly well themselves or somesuch.

c68zapdsm5i1ru · 26-01-2018 10:46am

splinter65 wrote: »

Of course it is good manners, in Ireland and other European countries.
And traditionally in western 1st world countries on public transport able bodied people have offered seats to a selection of people they instinctively know deserve to sit .
But this is not necessarily traditional in other cultures and part of becoming a diverse multicultural country is accepting that some of our “manners” are not practiced at all in huge swathes of the world and that’s all there is to it.
Add to that recent feminazi complaints about not wanting doors held open or chairs pulled out and a lot of resentment from childless women directed towards pregnant colleagues and it all adds up.

I've never witnessed this. Possibly a subject for another thread, but would be interested to know how you've come to this conclusion.

c68zapdsm5i1ru · 26-01-2018 10:48am

splinter65 wrote: »

There’s mounting resentment in the workplace in childless women who find themselves being asked to do extra often unpaid work as their female colleagues who are parents/pregnant exercise they’re parental/maternal rights.

https://www.google.com/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/women/work/childless-women-should-get-maternity-leave-too/amp/

Oh right, just seen this explanation. But surely anyone resents being asked to do extra unpaid work to facilitate someone else's rights, regardless of whether it's a pregnant woman or not.

Baby On Board

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