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No getting through to sister

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    #32
    BBFAN
    Registered Users Posts: 2,228 ✭✭✭BBFAN


    I don't mean to be rude OP but does your sister have your full faculties? If she doesn't then you need to apply to make her a ward of court. If she does then you've very little say here.

    I say this as someone who runs a nursing home so I have some experience in this area.

    If she is in a nursing home by the way the rent will be counted as income and 80% of it will go towards her care.

    The furniture I don't see a big deal if there's no possibility that she's going to return there.

    Other than that sorry, not much other advice I can give you.


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    #33
    lulu1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,815 ✭✭✭lulu1


    BBFAN wrote: »
    I don't mean to be rude OP but does your sister have your full faculties? If she doesn't then you need to apply to make her a ward of court. If she does then you've very little say here.

    I say this as someone who runs a nursing home so I have some experience in this area.

    If she is in a nursing home by the way the rent will be counted as income and 80% of it will go towards her care.

    The furniture I don't see a big deal if there's no possibility that she's going to return there.

    Other than that sorry, not much other advice I can give you.

    Oh yes she is perfect in that way she may be a bit niave where she would believe nearly anything. Yes we know we have no say atal just voicing our opinion when asked. Just dont like sitting back seeing it happen


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    #34
    seamus
    Registered Users Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    OP, one thing worth considering:

    https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/death/before_a_death/power_of_attorney.html#l69954

    This is not the same as making them a ward of the court or taking power away from them. It is not uncommon for someone entering sheltered accommodation or a nursing home to delegate authority over some of their business to another person. The declaration would be made BY your sister, with her agreement. It's not something you go to court to force to be taken away from her.

    The person with this is legally obliged to act in the best interests of the person - that is, to not use it to line their own pockets or benefit their friends.

    However, it is usually advisable to give this power to a trusted 3rd party in exchange for a set fee, such as a solicitor or accountant. This means that nobody else in the family will get special treatment, and in the event that the person with PoA is found to be acting improperly, legal action can be taken against them without tearing your family apart.


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    #35
    TheBoyConor
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,292 ✭✭✭TheBoyConor


    lulu1 wrote: »
    Oh yes she is perfect in that way she may be a bit niave where she would believe nearly anything. Yes we know we have no say atal just voicing our opinion when asked. Just dont like sitting back seeing it happen

    So in other words she does not have her full faculties as she is lacking in critical think and judgement. The fact that she is in a nursing home at not even 70 years of age would to some extent also back up the thinking that there is something amiss.

    This is going to end in tears. It will wind up with the girl either wrecking the house, not paying rent and being a nightmare to evict afterwords or the parents digging their heels in to get the house for a pittance pay off.

    You should at least consider the options for having your sister's state of mind assessed as it seems that the 18 year old or her parents are running rings around your sister. Unless there is some significant physical or mental issues at play, a normal functioning person of 70 should not be in a nursing home. You might have some chance of her being made a ward of court and thus putting the brakes on this madness.

    This is the sort of thing that went on in ireland in times gone by. People saying things like "ah sure he's fine, he's just a bit innocent/naieve/simple" when the truth was that there was an intellectual disability there. A typical head in the sand denial mentality that cause an awful lot of rot in this country.


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    #36
    lulu1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,815 ✭✭✭lulu1


    TheBoyConor wrote: »
    So in other words she does not have her full faculties as she is lacking in critical think and judgement. The fact that she is in a nursing home at not even 70 years of age would to some extent also back up the thinking that there is something amiss.

    This is going to end in tears. It will wind up with the girl either wrecking the house, not paying rent and being a nightmare to evict afterwords or the parents digging their heels in to get the house for a pittance pay off.

    You should at least consider the options for having your sister's state of mind assessed as it seems that the 18 year old or her parents are running rings around your sister. Unless there is some significant physical or mental issues at play, a normal functioning person of 70 should not be in a nursing home. You might have some chance of her being made a ward of court and thus putting the brakes on this madness.

    This is the sort of thing that went on in ireland in times gone by. People saying things like "ah sure he's fine, he's just a bit innocent/naieve/simple" when the truth was that there was an intellectual disability there. A typical head in the sand denial mentality that cause an awful lot of rot in this country.

    She's not in a nursing home she's in sheltered accomadation looking after herself 24/7 Its the best decision she ever made because she loves company and when she was living in her own house she seen no one unless ourselves


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    #37
    BBFAN
    Registered Users Posts: 2,228 ✭✭✭BBFAN


    TheBoyConor wrote: »
    So in other words she does not have her full faculties as she is lacking in critical think and judgement. The fact that she is in a nursing home at not even 70 years of age would to some extent also back up the thinking that there is something amiss.

    This is going to end in tears. It will wind up with the girl either wrecking the house, not paying rent and being a nightmare to evict afterwords or the parents digging their heels in to get the house for a pittance pay off.

    You should at least consider the options for having your sister's state of mind assessed as it seems that the 18 year old or her parents are running rings around your sister. Unless there is some significant physical or mental issues at play, a normal functioning person of 70 should not be in a nursing home. You might have some chance of her being made a ward of court and thus putting the brakes on this madness.

    This is the sort of thing that went on in ireland in times gone by. People saying things like "ah sure he's fine, he's just a bit innocent/naieve/simple" when the truth was that there was an intellectual disability there. A typical head in the sand denial mentality that cause an awful lot of rot in this country.

    What???

    Plenty of people of 70 can't live on their own full time because of physical problems and also loneliness.

    To presume they don't have their full faculties is patronising in the extreme.


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