Helping mother with hearing loss

Cabaal · 10-10-2019 11:42am #1

My mother who is her 70's and her hearing is getting worse and worse and its getting to the point where unless you are facing her and speaking very clearly she doesn't pick up properly on what you say.

This has been going on a few years and its getting worse and worse, she's completely missing words or entire sentences and you can tell she is trying to compensate by assuming what the conversation is about based on one or two words, she's way off the mark a lot of the time.

Some family members have been very unhelpful in their approach to the issue telling her to "get her f**ken hearing checked!" over the years which hasn't helped I think.

I on the other hand have taken a much more caring approach and now and then I've said I'm happy to bring her to get her hearing checked, I've explained that its about quality of life and that as I need glasses I'm going to make sure I spend the money on them to have a better quality of life.

I feel my mother is concerned about two things
1 what will people think of her having a hearing aid
2 the cost.

I'm looking for advice on how to approach the whole thing, I know hearing aids can be expensive and I feel that if she had experience of having her hearing improved it might help push her towards addressing the issue in the long term.

I know some company's do samples like https://www.hiddenhearing.ie/contact-us/request-free-sample-hearing-aid are these a total waste of time?

She does have tinnitus which is a factor of course, my understanding (I'm open to correction) is if she was able to hear better then what she could hear would at least help drown out the tinnitus noise.

joanmul · 11-10-2019 9:51am

If you could point out to your mother the many people who are wearing hearing aids- the aids are easy to spot. They are not few and far between. My brother, sister and myself wear them. No I wouldn’t go for Hidden Hearing’s offer - it’s a marketing ploy and they persecute you after that once they have your contact details. My sister went to specsavers and found them very good. You can get a two week free trial - I think all of the companies do that. However I think it would take longer than two weeks to get used to hearing aids. As regards the cost your mother might qualify for prsi grants. As regards other members of your family - why don’t you ask them to chip in towards the cost and tell them it’s a factor in your mother’s apprehension. Good luck.

Mango Joe · 11-10-2019 10:03am

You're a good son, your siblings advice is pretty unhelpful in fairness!

Go to a recommended local independent audiologist if you can find one or I've heard that specsavers are ok too, hidden hearing don't have a good reputation for looking after the customers interests before their own....

Ideally her family would help out with the cost - She might get assistance too with payments the business will advise on this.

Tell her 70 years unaided hearing is excellent and that its more embarrassing and noticeable to miss out on conversations like this.

CiDeRmAn · 11-10-2019 11:22am

I don't know if your mpother might be eligible for the medical card, but it might be an idea to review this page
https://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/health/health_services/dental_aural_and_optical_services/aural_services.html[/.url]

There are hearing tests and provision of hearing aids under the medical card, as I understand they are very expensive.

As Manjo Joe has said, 70 years of unaided hearing is fantastic and it's okay to ask for and get a little help, the bounce in quality of life is going to be amazing for her.
In fact, she will only realise what she has been missing when the hearing aid is in and working.

little bess · 11-10-2019 4:59pm

If your mum has a medical card she can get hearing aids free from the HSE. She’ll need to be referred by her GP. I was referred and the waiting time for appointment to see hse community audiology in Dublin was about 4 months. It will save you a ton of cash and the service they provide is excellent ðŸ‘

votecounts · 11-10-2019 5:02pm

I would second SpecSavers as they provided a great hearing aid and professional service to my Father as his hearing was getting worse.
Just for the OP, has your mother had her hears syringed by a nurse, could help.

Princess Calla · 11-10-2019 5:11pm

I wish I got to my 70s without needing a hearing aid... Ah well. If in Dublin I found bonavox very good.

Wherever you decide one piece of advice never buy your batteries in a chemist, they are ridiculously expensive and don't last as long.

Gormal · 11-10-2019 5:15pm

They are expensive to buy. If she has enough PSRI contributions she will get a good grant towards them. If she has a medical card she can get a free set on the HSE. Although they are a little bulky and skin coloured compared to going private.

I have bilateral sensorineural hearing loss and tinnitus (difficulty with speech tones and ringing ears) this started in my late 20s, I had to push to get hearing aids since I couldn't afford to buy. Finally got some in my 40s. It is not a cure all, but you do hear more and realise all the sounds you miss, like birds singing. Since you have to face her, she may well be lip reading a little, without anyone realising it. It takes a few weeks for your ears and brain to adjust wearing them, your brain has to relearn the sounds. And yes the tinnitus is less noticeable with them in, some of the fancy private models cater for tinnitus with sounds.

I understand where your mum is coming from. But hearing loss isn't exclusive to the older generation and lots of people wear hearing aids, some are in the ear, some behind the ear. I would tell her to never mind what people think about hearing aids, that it's more embarrassing for her to be missing out on conversations like Mango Joe said.

I would compare audiologists around, a lot offer a free test and a chat with no obligation. I hear Bonavox are good and wherever you get the hearing aids, you can buy a box of batteries of them at a good price.

Cabaal · 14-10-2019 2:45pm

Thanks to everyone for the help and advise, I'm inclined to think cost is a big factor but she also doesn't want to face the reality, but and I believe she has a medical card so I'll explore this route first and see what I can find out.
I think its going to be a uphill struggle though

I just don't understand the reluctance of the whole thing, I'm in my 30's and if I needed a walking stick I'd use one. If it made my life easier I'd go for it. Glasses, hearing aid etc are no different in my view, anything that makes life less of a struggle

I'll have to work on getting her on board and thats going to be hard going

Gormal · 15-10-2019 7:43pm

This page will give you al the info for a medical card HA

TomOnBoard · 01-11-2019 10:14pm

Cabaal wrote: »

Thanks to everyone for the help and advise, I'm inclined to think cost is a big factor but she also doesn't want to face the reality, but and I believe she has a medical card so I'll explore this route first and see what I can find out.
I think its going to be a uphill struggle though

I just don't understand the reluctance of the whole thing, I'm in my 30's and if I needed a walking stick I'd use one. If it made my life easier I'd go for it. Glasses, hearing aid etc are no different in my view, anything that makes life less of a struggle

I'll have to work on getting her on board and thats going to be hard going

You answered your own question really! You're in your 30s.... Yer Ma's in her 70s...
Different attitudes etc... It's life and how we ALL age.... She's simply 40 years ahead of you,but believe me, your sense of (enforced) elderly independence, pride and sheer curmudgeonery that will arrive with years will equally affect you and all who follow you....

So, continue to be gentle with her and don't make it an issue between ye... Do a deal with her and at least get her to agree to do a free audiology/hearing test in Specsavers so that ye will at least get an understanding of the degree of hearing loss at various frequencies in each ear.

Measuring tinnitus is a different kettle of fish entirely. Get ye to Specsavers, and buy absolutely nothing there, but get a copy/print-out of the audiogram. That piece of paper is the sole piece of objective evidence that can be used to move things forward. Mention the tinnitus to the Audiologist as a separate issue, and s/he will feed pure tones into each ear at a variety of frequencies that may help to establish the frequency range in which the tinnitus is being experienced. I say "being experienced"...I don't say "being heard"... Why? Well, I've been studying /dealing with this for almost 2 decades.. My sole take-away? The vast bulk of tinnitus sufferers are not HEARING the buzzes, clicks, shrieking, roaring, whistling or whatever sound is being experienced... My understanding of the science says that its not happening in the ear itself... Its most likely happening in areas of the brain, well inside the skull, that process the signals that the ear organs send in to it... So, the use of 'masking' of tinnitus needs creful consideration... AFAIK, its much more about using sounds to calm the auditory processing, to habituate the brain and do a range of other stuff than it is about feeding some kind of 'anti-sound' that will mask the tinnitus to produce "total silence"...

Helping mother with hearing loss

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