How do I stop being so tight with money?

GreeBo wrote: »

OP I am exactly the same and have no issues with it, I am much better off than many of my peers thanks to it.

I don't like spending money unless I am getting value, I will typically shop in sales or online to save money, I get satisfaction from saving money.

However if I decide I want to drop a couple of grand on some luxury item I will and being careful with money is what enables me to do this.
If I was spending €10 a day on coffee or something then I wouldnt be able to treat myself.

I would echo this exactly. I like to travel and spend a lot of money on a decent holiday every summer. Sometimes go on two holidays. I’m heading to China in a couple of weeks. I value being able to afford to do something like that than spending my money mindlessly on things I don’t need. I don’t spend huge sums of money on clothes to replace them a few months later. I don’t upgrade my phone every year, when I need a new phone I see what is available on upgrade so I usually wouldn’t have the latest model but they all do the same thing anyway.

On the other hand I have a friend who has a massive wardrobe of clothing, plenty of clothes I’ve only seen her wear once, but has lived in her overdraft for the last 15 years. That lifestyle is not for me.

Deleted User wrote: »

whats that 100k for OP

you renting, do you own your own place?

do you travel?

is it all going to fund a long and happy early retirement?

if you have answers to the above, you know why youre doing it and just need to remind yourself of that

if you dont....then forget the micromanagement questions and ask yourself the one big question- whats all this money going to be for?

I dont think you need an answer to that question actually.
Maybe its as simple as comfort in knowing that its there?

ok so two observations from your posts OP..

1. Lifestyle.. you seem to live quiet a "quiet" life.. you don't go out much.. you don't go on holidays.. etc,.. (you said that you don't have the opportunity to socialise much - why is this?)

2. Money - you have a lot of money..

So which is feeding into which - does your lack of desire to "live" more just mean that as a result you have more money? or does your desire to be economical (or only spend if you deem something is good value) result in you not living a more fuller life? ie socialising, going on trips etc..

Money aside, are you happy with your lifestyle? (which seems to be v quiet)..

camel12 wrote: »

I'm saving for a house. No goal in mind. I'm not actively saving. I'm just not spending it.

I don't stop myself doing things due to money like going for holidays. I don't go because it's not something I desire.

As someone else said, I go for value. I spend big if it's something I want and it's value.

I'm generous to some friends if they're struggling. A few years back a friend of mine was struggling and I gave them I think 4 or 500 euro.

I hear people in work saying things like "can't wait for payday" or "the account is low" and I'm wondering am I just tight that I'm not like that?

You know OP, I don't think there's a massive issue here. We have been programmed as a society over time to consume. We are constantly bombarded with ads to buy 'stuff'. Shopping is a hobby and a way to spend time for many. I'm not totally immune to it, but it's become even easier to browse on amazon or the likes and buy things with a few clicks, whether we need it or not.

You sound like you don't really do that and when you're not frittering away money on stuff you didn't intend to buy but picked it up when browsing, it's easy to have money in the bank account at the end of the month.

I don't think I'm the only person who has gone into Penney's to buy socks and come out with a bagful of stuff and €80 less in my pocket. Ditto for the likes of IKEA. But I probably didn't really need most of it. I get the impression that you don't do that OP. And that mindset is quite alien for a lot of people today.

camel12 wrote: »

No they don't.

The money I have will go towards a house.

70k a year, no house and only 100k in the bank.

You're not tight with money.

OP, do you have joy in your life?

Would spending a bit of money improve your quality of live? If yes, then for me that would be value for money.

This thread really got me thinking.

I'm would consider myself a bit spendy but fundamentally sensible. I don't smoke or go out drinking a huge amount (past that age frankly) but I like to go for nice meals and would buy nice wine or fancy gins to drink at home at the weekend, because life is too short to sit around drinking stuff you don't enjoy.

I probably spend too much on clothes and have recently started trying to buy more investment pieces, good coats, handbags etc with the aim of having them for years and years, but they're not cheap.

I do however have a whole list of things I cheap out on because I just don't think they matter.
- leg waxing - my local place charges €42 a pop so i just bought an epilator and now do it myself
- groceries - I think I have this down to a fine art. I buy really good food but I know where to get the best of everything at the best price and am quite anal about it. I'm the embodiment of that BBC show with that Greg guy from Masterchef - I think its called "eat well for less".
- we're talking about getting married next year - if I get my way it will be registry office and immediate family only. Now with various influences that might not exactly happen but I definitely don't want the €30k standard Irish wedding. Again, I just dont see the value.
- my hair - for a woman my age I spend the least of anyone I know. €20 3/4 times per year on a basic trim. I have nice, long straight hair and I don't see any reason to spend more.

Theres probably more, but on the surface I'm sure I'd appear frivolous to some but it doesnt mean I'm not good with money. I've never been one of those paycheck to paycheck people and struggle often to understand when colleagues in particular (given that we probably all earn roughly the same) remark that they're broke for the last week of the month.

Some people are just inherently not good with money. From my read of things you could stand to loosen the purse strings a little just to enable a bit more spontaneity (have that over priced cinema drink next time! it won't break you!) You won't suddenly become bad with money by having an over priced coke.

Also, maybe make more of a plan about that house. Having something solid in your mind to spend that €100k on might make it more meaningful to you. Surely having a home of your own would bring a sense of satisfaction.

Do you still have your communion money?

sebastopol wrote: »

I disagree with people here. you sound miserly to me. making excuses i don't like any holiday/the family comment . did you get the 500 back. do you buy rounds in a pub. do you tip waiter if you go for meal. do you go for meal.? what do you do after work, do you get a drink to take home do you drink?

the fact you have to ask how can you stop being as you are shows it must be a problem .

I don't agree. not going on a holiday they don't desire to go on and not drinking is not an indication of being miserly.
regarding the family comment it would be interesting to hear the context in which it was said. for all we know it could have been said out of begrudgery or jealously. if the op helped out a friend for four or five hundred euro it was kind thing to do whether he got it back or not. a miser would likely have not given it in the first place. and I have first hand experience of a tight miserly person in my circle, the OP wouldn't come anywhere near!

whippet wrote: »

My father in law is a millionaire ..

Married well there...

camel12 wrote: »

For example, I am single but if I ever decide to get married I do not want to spend several thousand on a ring. I think it's a huge waste of money for something that is a status symbol type thing. I wouldnt want to have a big wedding either costing loads...would rather go abroad, somewhere quiet and have a holiday at the same time.

Lots of people feel the same. I think you are not very clear on what the word tight actually means.

Do what you want - dont let anyone influence how you spend your money

A lot of what other people call "being tight" I would call "not being a mug"

Take a look at the stingey thread on here if you want to see some real tight misers