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What if Hitler grew up in Ireland?

  • 16-12-2016 2:28am
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 552 ✭✭✭


    Imagine the big gas fella himself grew up in Connemara. Whom would he target? (if anyone).

    Would he still be a mad lad?

    Has this thread been Godwinned in the OP?


Comments

  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 7,611 ✭✭✭david75


    He'd have founded or been a member of Legion of Mary or Iona


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,720 ✭✭✭Hal1


    He'd probably have been shot in the rising.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,813 ✭✭✭Noveight


    Adolf O'Hitler.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,154 ✭✭✭✭josip


    Would have played for Oulart the Ballagh


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,563 ✭✭✭dd972


    AH, Oh my gawd...


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 552 ✭✭✭Commotion Ocean


    We'd all have a gas time


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,973 ✭✭✭RayM


    He'd be a fan of Fine Gael, rugby and the Sunday Independent. He'd drive an Audi, he'd hate cyclists, he'd think Anthropogenic Global Warming is a myth and he'd probably spend most of his time complaining that you can't say anything nowadays without being accused of racism.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 16,768 ✭✭✭✭tomwaterford


    RayM wrote: »
    He'd be a fan of Fine Gael, rugby and the Sunday Independent. He'd drive an Audi, he'd hate cyclists, he'd think Anthropogenic Global Warming is a myth and he'd probably spend most of his time complaining that you can't say anything nowadays without being accused of racism.

    He'd also be the oldest person alive in ireland


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,638 ✭✭✭✭Arghus


    He'd be the lad who'd always start ranting and raving about the Jews after a feed of pints, and we'd all be like, relax will ya, go easy, and he'd be like yeah, sorry lads get a bit carried away sometimes, it's the drink yaknow. And we'd go, it's alright, sure we all go a bit ga-ga sometimes.

    And all the while we'd know, deep in our hearts, that he'd been born in another country- another time even - that we wouldn't be so safe. We wouldn't have the drink to help and preserve us; to hold down his overweening ambition, fire and hate and horrible designs for the world and all of us in it. And we'd say, thanks be to Jaysus.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,690 ✭✭✭✭Peregrinus


    Born in 1889? He'd have served in the British forces in the Great War. On or shortly after demobilisation he'd have joined the Black and Tans. In 1922 he'd have relocated to England and used his retirement gratuity from the Tans to fund a stint in art school, which would not have ended well. He'd have hung around the fringes of radical politics, but without a huge population of defeated and depressed people feeling betrayed, his brand of fiery rhetoric would not have appealed. He'd probably have found his strongest ties with other disaffected ex-soldiers, and they would identify their betrayers as the British ruling class, so he'd have ended up on the radical fringes of socialism/communism/the trade union movement. He might have risen to a position of some note in the wake of the Great Depression.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,564 ✭✭✭✭whiskeyman


    Hon Hitler!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,353 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    We had our version. Picture a big fascist potato, who should have been taken as seriously as a big fascist potato ought to have been. We made him Garda commissioner though. And gave him a state funeral...

    https://todayinirishhistory.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/oduffy.gif

    Heil O'Duffy!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 7,611 ✭✭✭david75


    Is there a joke in there about him rising to power and the whole country in employment and ireland befoming a European power and him hailed as the new saint pateick for driving all the ________ out of Ireland?

    Brits probably?

    He'd have been buddies with Dev anyways.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,520 ✭✭✭learn_more


    Peregrinus wrote: »
    Born in 1889? He'd have served in the British forces in the Great War. On or shortly after demobilisation he'd have joined the Black and Tans. In 1922 he'd have relocated to England and used his retirement gratuity from the Tans to fund a stint in art school, which would not have ended well. He'd have hung around the fringes of radical politics, but without a huge population of defeated and depressed people feeling betrayed, his brand of fiery rhetoric would not have appealed. He'd probably have found his strongest ties with other disaffected ex-soldiers, and they would identify their betrayers as the British ruling class, so he'd have ended up on the radical fringes of socialism/communism/the trade union movement. He might have risen to a position of some note in the wake of the Great Depression.

    It's good to see that AH posts are taken seriously. Rightly so.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,350 ✭✭✭Cortina_MK_IV


    He'd have got his first gas bill, said fuch dis, emigrated and opened a pub in New York.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32,956 ✭✭✭✭Omackeral


    Christopher Hitler. His mates would call him Gitler.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,033 ✭✭✭✭Richard Hillman


    He would be a SJW


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,316 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    He might have been like a stupid nastier Dev. Dev believed in Ireland for the Irish and all that crap. Had a cultural view of Ireland somewhat similar to Hitlers version of germany. Big strapping men, comely maidens at home etc... Just add in ethnic cleansing and you've got Hitler.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,228 ✭✭✭podgemonster


    RayM wrote: »
    He'd be a fan of Fine Gael, rugby and the Sunday Independent. He'd drive an Audi, he'd hate cyclists, he'd think Anthropogenic Global Warming is a myth and he'd probably spend most of his time complaining that you can't say anything nowadays without being accused of racism.

    That description is essentially George Hook


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,338 ✭✭✭aphex™


    He'd have gone to IADT, or, failing that Ballyfermot.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,690 ✭✭✭✭Peregrinus


    Grayson wrote: »
    He might have been like a stupid nastier Dev. Dev believed in Ireland for the Irish and all that crap. Had a cultural view of Ireland somewhat similar to Hitlers version of germany. Big strapping men, comely maidens at home etc... Just add in ethnic cleansing and you've got Hitler.
    Nah. Hitler had the whole Fuhrerprinzip/not really liking election vibe. Dev was completely lacking that.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,354 ✭✭✭ChippingSodbury


    josip wrote: »
    Would have played for Oulart the Ballagh

    Surely Longford Slashers...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,721 ✭✭✭✭AndyBoBandy


    He'd have been the village drunkard, always rambling away about this that or the other while barely propped up against a wall, bottle in 1 hand, pipe in the other.

    And as the village folk walked past while on their merry way, and he was rambling on about some shïte, they'd say;

    "Ah look there he is, who's fault is it today Dolly? The feckin seagulls?"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,353 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    sugarman wrote: »
    He'd have just complained and never done anything about it. As we love to do.
    Which would have been a good thing, no? Considering what his 'doing something about it' entailed...?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,515 ✭✭✭✭whisky_galore


    Arghus wrote: »
    He'd be the lad who'd always start ranting and raving about the Jews after a feed of pints...

    Hitler didn't drink alcohol...


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,848 ✭✭✭?Cee?view




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,397 ✭✭✭✭Turtyturd


    Growing up in Ireland he'd most likely have targeted travellers after one of them badly tarmaced his parents driveway.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,942 ✭✭✭topper75


    Turtyturd wrote: »
    Growing up in Ireland he'd most likely have targeted travellers after one of them badly tarmaced his parents driveway.

    The plumbing and fittings! They've all been removed from the 'showers' kommandant!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 81,220 ✭✭✭✭biko


    Adolf would probably have been part of the 1916 rising.
    He was always a fighter that lad.


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  • Moderators, Music Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,734 Mod ✭✭✭✭Boom_Bap


    He would have gotten loads of abuse about that ronnie.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 26,567 ✭✭✭✭Fratton Fred


    He'd have joined the IRA but only played a bit part, choosing instead to get others to do his dirty work. He would then have managed to delegate responsibility to others to negotiate the treaty, but then claim he was against it, becoming a key figure in the anti treaty side in a civil war.

    After losing the civil war, he would again worm his way in to a significant role and try his best to turn Ireland in to a place for the pure Irish based on a Roman Catholic agrarian society with maidens dancing at the crossroads.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,264 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    Hitler didn't drink alcohol...

    The Austrian Hitler didn't, but the Irish Hitler would most definitely have been knocking them back


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,316 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    Hitler didn't drink alcohol...

    Yet he started his career by shouting at drunks in beerhalls.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,554 ✭✭✭Pat Mustard


    If Hitler grew up in Ireland, he'd have become one of those 'trendy' lefty politicians with a double barrelled name. He would wear a blazer but no tie, cycle around on a fixie bike and bring his crying baby to meetings.


  • Registered Users Posts: 186 ✭✭GalwayGirl26


    ''Art school? Art school?? 'Tis far from a fancy art school you were raised lad.''

    And after a stint learning a trade, the whole thing would have gone much the same.........


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,499 ✭✭✭IamMetaldave




  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,875 ✭✭✭A Little Pony


    He would be Sinn Fein leader. The only party mental enough to have him.


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