Christmas Cards: do you still write them?

10-11-2019 4:56pm #1

It’s time to start looking at the list of recipients and checking surreptitiously if they are indeed still alive. I keep up the tradition of sending cards to all, and it is most especially appreciated by the rapidly dwindling generation of my late mother. I might include a little letter, continuing from when my mother would do the same. One of her friends I had assumed was long deceased as I hadn’t got any cards from her, and last I heard she was very ill and 91... then all of a sudden a very coherent card arrives in her hand-writing, expressing her worry about my health!

I check rip.ie in case any have died over the year, then will send a letter of condolence to remaining relatives, if any. Invariably my mother’s generation would be religious, so a card with a crib or village church scene would be appropriate. There would always be a couple of these cards left over, and the decision would be to keep these over for next year, hoping recipient’s memories would be too short to realise I’ve Sent the same card two years in a row, or to send them to folk I know probably have not too much time for religion. I send nearly 60 cards in all, so like to get started well in time and hope people will not have died off by the time I get to send them, especially if I have them all stamped and ready to go.

Sometimes I might forget who is in the household receiving the card, and have to decide whether to put “To Mary & family” or “To all at no. 5” or simply “wishing ye the best” and signing it. The lead name, the one I want to open the envelope, will be written there. Then, once I’ve begun listing out the names “To Mary, Tom, Patrick, Joseph...” and suddenly find I’ve forgotten the last one, things become awkward and realise the “...and family” would have been more appropriate. And whether to include the names of the partners of the children can be tricky, as I’m not quite sure if they are still with them and yet leaving them out can seem rude.

Has anybody made any major faux-pas when writing/sending cards?

Your Face · 10-11-2019 5:36pm

I don't send them anymore because all our traditions are now deemed racist and harmful the environment.

EmmetSpiceland · 10-11-2019 5:49pm

God no, I’m not 70.

I text people I care about who I won’t see, maybe email a couple of others.

Can’t imagine the hassle of sitting down and scribbling a quick “happy Christmas” and then having to go to a post box.

No thank you.

One eyed Jack · 10-11-2019 5:50pm

It’s admirable OP that you put so much thought into sending cards but my goodness that’s a lot of effort to go to, so fair play

I don’t put as much thought into sending cards as that, but reading your post makes me think I should, so if it could be considered that my faux pas in the past was not putting enough thought into sending cards or who and for what reason I was sending them and it wasn’t just a case of “the done thing”, this year I’ve now actually resolved to actually think about the whole idea as having a lot of meaning to some people!

Cheers for that OP

tea and coffee · 10-11-2019 5:53pm

I send a few, And like you OP, the list is dwindling. Older relatives and one or two of my (now deceased) parent's friends.

Wibbs · 10-11-2019 5:53pm

I send three alright. Emails/texts/calls to others.

10-11-2019 5:54pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

God no, I’m not 70.

I text people I care about who I won’t see, maybe email a couple of others.

Can’t imagine the hassle of sitting down and scribbling a quick “happy Christmas” and then having to go to a post box.

No thank you.

Hey, I’m only 58 I’ll have ye know. Ya can’t hang an email on the card hanger, well you could but it’s not very pretty

10-11-2019 5:57pm

tea and coffee wrote: »

I send a few, And like you OP, the list is dwindling. Older relatives and one or two of my (now deceased) parent's friends.

My list never seems to dwindle as I add the younger relatives on who’ve flown their nests, showing them the old ways. Also the vet gets one now from the cat, who incidentally co-signs my cards.

Rubberchikken · 10-11-2019 5:58pm

yes:)

10-11-2019 6:02pm

One eyed Jack wrote: »

It’s admirable OP that you put so much thought into sending cards but my goodness that’s a lot of effort to go to, so fair play

I don’t put as much thought into sending cards as that, but reading your post makes me think I should, so if it could be considered that my faux pas in the past was not putting enough thought into sending cards or who and for what reason I was sending them and it wasn’t just a case of “the done thing”, this year I’ve now actually resolved to actually think about the whole idea as having a lot of meaning to some people!

Cheers for that OP

I took on the task if sending the family cards when I was about 12. Not in a million years would my father write even one card, he always said I’ll leave that to you two ladies. And half of them then were to his business connections. My mother worked all hours getting orders out with the cottage industry she ran with her sisters, and I started worrying that all the family, friends and business contacts would fail to receive cards. Also it satisfied my nosiness about who these people were, where they lived etc, and all were written in my mother’s old address book dating from 1940s.

appledrop · 10-11-2019 6:03pm

I'm only in my 30s and sending + receiving Christmas cards is one of my favourite traditions!

Now I will admit I'm following in my mothers footsteps who loves sending them. As a child I loved opening the cards, reading the messages + figuring out who the odd one was from with no signature! We would also get lovely detailed letters/messages from those overseas who we wouldn't see for long time.

Then we would have them on up on mantelpiece + one of those card holders. I think around 70 was our record.

I think it's sad this tradition is dying out. Text messages are not the same at all.

Mezzotint · 10-11-2019 6:05pm

Every year I get loads of cards from people who don't include their last name or their address, so I have absolutely no idea how to respond!

Merry Xmas
From Squiggle and family!

What's even worse is one distant cousin (who moved house several times) got her nose our of joint because I didn't reply!

Also since nobody is listed in the phone book anymore due to modern paranoia and not having a landline plugged in since 1987, you can't find anyone's address anymore, even if you could be bothered doing the detective work.

If this is what most people are doing, it'll definitely die out as nobody will have any idea where to send cards.

As good as An Post are at figuring out addresses, I don't think they'll ever find Mary, Co. Dublin.

Purple Mountain · 10-11-2019 6:11pm

I only now send them to the handful of family who live in other countries and its our yearly way to say hello bar the odd WhatsApp exchange.
I usually enclose a photo of the family from the year and they do same.
I used to send Christmas cards to the older relatives in Ireland by post but simply because the price of a stamp is a euro now, I don't.
The aunts and uncles who I visit over Christmas get their card handed to them with a box of sweets.
I reckon An Post have lost around 15e from me per year from ceasing posting Irish cards.

JupiterKid · 10-11-2019 6:14pm

Yes, I still send Christmas cards and I find a lot of pleasure in receiving them from friends and family also. There’s something lovely about putting in the effort to sit down, think and write the card and to post it off.

It’s a tradition sadly on the wane but IMO nothing compares to getting a tangible card you can put on your mantelpiece every Christmas. It is also an opportunity to check up on friends and distant family to check if all is well.

I always buy charity cards, and send out about 40 or thereabouts in total. As my parents are now passed on and my two older sisters live abroad, it is up to me to represent our family in the cards I send to friends of my parents, who themselves are dying off and dwindling in their numbers. I buy, write and post off the cards at the beginning of December.

Each year it seems I get less and less Christmas cards and more and more texts and emails. Nothing beats getting a card.

I’m 44 BTW.

Mezzotint · 10-11-2019 6:17pm

If An Post wants to drum up some business, how about an ad campaign encouraging people to put their return address on cards? In the US, for example, it's almost totally universal that the return address is on the top left corner of the envelope. Whereas in Ireland we're all apparently psychics.

They could even sell Xmas stickers with your address and eircode ordered online. Or customised cards with your address. Business opportunity!!

10-11-2019 6:18pm

I've been sending a small number of electronic Christmas cards in Irish every Christmas since about 1997 from Irishcorner.com. Just so I can't be accused of never sending a card.

Ubbquittious · 10-11-2019 6:23pm

Mezzotint wrote: »

If An Post wants to drum up some business, how about an ad campaign encouraging people to put their return address on cards? In the US, for example, it's almost totally universal that the return address is on the top left corner of the envelope. Whereas in Ireland we're all apparently psychics.

They could even sell Xmas stickers with your address and eircode ordered online. Or customised cards with your address. Business opportunity!!

Thats because you can just write "Yer man Sullivan with the small blue cottage in the backarse of Mayo" on the envelope and it will get there

Badly Drunk Boy · 10-11-2019 6:27pm

I'm down to 2 cards at this stage. One to an older relative who lives in the same estate as me

(just because she keep sending them), and the other to a female friend who went to college with me. We graduated 24 years ago and I don't know where exactly she lives, but possibly back in her family home where I send the card.

voldejoie · 10-11-2019 6:27pm

Love Christmas cards. I don't send them to everyone, mostly just friends and relatives who live abroad, but I really enjoy the whole ritual of picking out the cards, writing them out, putting them in the post and then getting a text a few days later to say it's arrived

suicide_circus · 10-11-2019 6:29pm

Eh No. Thats like so bad for the environment.

Gynoid · 10-11-2019 6:33pm

Ach I usually do. I say it reluctantly because I am not a huge fan of Christmas at all, and every year I vow not to bother. Then about the 19th or 20th I get a rush of guilt and start looking for my address list and hoping there are cards left in the shops. The aunties, uncles, siblings, mother and in laws all get a card. Really I wish I could be more enthusiastic about it because it seems like such a 'nice person' thing to do - but I am an incorrigible winter Grinch. Meh.

Graces7 · 10-11-2019 7:07pm

Not cards, but often a small hand made gift eg an angel or a bell, and a letter.
Used to make and print my own cards.

A few years ago an old man in the Post office was spending nearly E20 on stamps for the cards he was sending. " Well, they sent me a card so I have to send them one.." It gave me pause for thought as that is a lot of cash for a pensioner to spend.

ecards are lovely too

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1 · 10-11-2019 7:16pm

A once a year opportunity to send something personal to friends and family. Giving each one a few minutes of your time to show they actually mean something to you; something a brief text just doesn't do.

We'll send around 40 cards and the number hasn't dwindled much over the years - some people are gone but new one's come along.

We receive them from people of all ages and our kids send them to their own circle now.

10-11-2019 7:17pm

A distant, but absolutely lovely relation in USA whom I discovered some years ago through genealogical research, sends with her card an annual newsletter detailing the births, deaths, graduations, and happenings in her family. I took up this idea which saves recipients from trying to decipher my appalling handwriting. I still put in the personal extra note to some of my parents’ elderly
friends.

10-11-2019 7:18pm

Always. I only ever give one to the wife, the parents, the sister, and my neighbours of many moons ago so it’s not many. It’s nice to get them though and if anyone mentions paper, trees, or bloody climate to me then I’ll shove the box off the cards up their hole.

Dank Janniels · 10-11-2019 7:21pm

The same people bitching bout sending christmas cards are the same people bitching bout post office closures!

People on the street, not on here I mean

byhookorbycrook · 10-11-2019 7:22pm

Inherited my late mother's list and also like to keep in touch with older people who were very good to her in her last years. I send a few of my own too.

gifted · 10-11-2019 7:23pm

Always....Herself would send a card for any reason....honestly, Hallmark owe me a holiday at this stage with the amount of money we give them

10-11-2019 7:24pm

Graces7 wrote: »

Not cards, but often a small hand made gift eg an angel or a bell, and a letter.
Used to make and print my own cards.

A few years ago an old man in the Post office was spending nearly E20 on stamps for the cards he was sending. " Well, they sent me a card so I have to send them one.." It gave me pause for thought as that is a lot of cash for a pensioner to spend.

ecards are lovely too

Perhaps An Post could do a special offer of a pack of 10 Christmas stamps for €5 during one 5 day period for all in receipt of the OAP, just one book for each person collecting the pension or having it paid into bank, although the admin of latter would make it tricky for admin.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1 · 10-11-2019 7:31pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Perhaps An Post could do a special offer of a pack of 10 Christmas stamps for €5 during one 5 day period for all in receipt of the OAP, just one book for each person collecting the pension or having it paid into bank, although the admin of latter would make it tricky for admin.

Not needed. It's well know that pensioners, and I'm one, have some of the highest disposable incomes. It's young working families that need the help at such an expensive time for them. If OAPs couldn't afford the stamp they're savvy enough not to send cards. The stamps are the least expensive part of the process anyway. Plus, how do you guarantee the stamps would be used on cards and by the pensioner rather than their family?

Gynoid · 10-11-2019 7:47pm

ReginaldSmythV wrote: »

Always. I only ever give one to the wife, the parents, the sister, and my neighbours of many moons ago so it’s not many. It’s nice to get them though and if anyone mentions paper, trees, or bloody climate to me then I’ll shove the box off the cards up their hole.

Ahhh that's the spirit...you're making me feel all Christmassy.. :pac:

r93kaey5p2izun · 10-11-2019 9:09pm

I had taken on the job of writing out the cards since I was around 9/10. I loved the whole tradition of it and the thought of some great aunt I'd never even met opening up our card down in Mayo. I always loved Christmas and writing out the cards was a key part of the annual celebrations. But I stopped having anything to do with Christmas two years ago, and haven't sent any since. I have felt a little bit guilty about those no longer receiving our cards, in case they take it as a slight. It does save a lot of money though - the price of a stamp is extortionate!

11-11-2019 7:05pm

Giana Hundreds Stand-in wrote: »

I had taken on the job of writing out the cards since I was around 9/10. I loved the whole tradition of it and the thought of some great aunt I'd never even met opening up our card down in Mayo. I always loved Christmas and writing out the cards was a key part of the annual celebrations. But I stopped having anything to do with Christmas two years ago, and haven't sent any since. I have felt a little bit guilty about those no longer receiving our cards, in case they take it as a slight. It does save a lot of money though - the price of a stamp is extortionate!

Indeed sending cards is very expensive, but as I am a household of one plus the cat, I don’t have many presents to worry about; I do like the ritual of card sending and like receiving them, decorating the place, and throwing a casual party in my little gaff where family and friends know they can meet up each year without it being a funeral. I’m the most centrally located, so folks are glad to meet up mulled wine, fizz and a bit of food. I reckon if I had more Christmas expenses I would find myself resorting to the eCards

blueshade · 11-11-2019 7:14pm

Given the price of an international stamp I think An Post want people to stop buying stamps. I used to buy packs of 10 but the price went up a few times before I had a chance to use them. I like sending cards and I try to get them from local animal rescues at least I know where the money is going, not just some tiny percentage that a lot of charity cards do.

Larbre34 · 11-11-2019 7:15pm

I can understand people liking to receive cards, but our total bill for card sending was getting above 100 quid, a ridiculous waste of money at the time of year. So for the last few years we put together bags of material for the homeless charities in Dublin, add the 100 quid to it in cash and contact all our friends and family online or when we're talking to them and say we're doing it in lieu.

Several people we know were just looking for someone to call a halt to cards and have joined us in diverting to charity.

Shady Grady · 11-11-2019 7:17pm

I do every year to family and friends. Even to teachers, the lollipop lady, and the postman.

Bobblehats · 11-11-2019 7:34pm

I make sure to do at least one every year. It also doubles as a birthday card, even valentines card of sorts how convenient is that? I love my lord and saviour. Mysterious ways

donegal_man · 11-11-2019 7:49pm

Since we got together my partner and I probably send around 30 cards. After putting up the Christmas tree we make hot chocolate laced with brandy & topped with whipped cream then settle down to write our cards. Creating our own Christmas tradition.

marklazarcovic · 11-11-2019 7:49pm

As a postie for over 20 yrs, I can tell you right now,even though it makes our day longer at Xmas, that people love getting Christmas cards, old and young especially .. makes them feel important enough to someone,I get to know people on the various routes I've done and I can see their joy, I've gone out of my way to find out who this particular card is for if it has the same name as another person living locally, sometimes involving several unscheduled stops,xtra chats add time to a days work..sometimes the letter for 'the Walsh family' ..gets to the correct family simply by identifying where it was posted from,and knowing which Walsh family has family there ..
Kids love it just as much,they don't get personal mail generally so it's a big deal,and I make a big deal (to them) about it if I happen to see them as it's being delivered.

Tldr.. post the cards,it makes people feel special at Christmas,it really does.

notsoyoungwan · 11-11-2019 8:34pm

I love getting and sending Christmas cards! It’s something I’d miss if it wasn’t happening. I send to family, friends, neighbors and a few colleagues.

Edgware · 11-11-2019 10:10pm

Larbre34 wrote: »

I can understand people liking to receive cards, but our total bill for card sending was getting above 100 quid, a ridiculous waste of money at the time of year. So for the last few years we put together bags of material for the homeless charities in Dublin, add the 100 quid to it in cash and contact all our friends and family online or when we're talking to them and say we're doing it in lieu.

Several people we know were just looking for someone to call a halt to cards and have joined us in diverting to charity.

Charity where administrators take about 70% for expenses.

Edgware · 11-11-2019 10:14pm

donegal_man wrote: »

Since we got together my partner and I probably send around 30 cards. After putting up the Christmas tree we make hot chocolate laced with brandy & topped with whipped cream then settle down to write our cards. Creating our own Christmas tradition.

Stop before the do gooders lash you for the excess calorie consumption

freshpopcorn · 11-11-2019 10:23pm

I only send a few to family but my mother sends a lot more. I think I'd take on the tradition.
Personally I think it's nice to go into the local newsagents and buy a box of cards and then your stamps and send them to people.

Potential-Monke · 12-11-2019 12:00am

The sending of cards is something I lump in with the Xmas Commercial machine. Hallmark love you people!

My mother still does it, but as noted above, the list is getting smaller and smaller every year. No harm, the stress it brings about is crazy, ensuring that everyone gets a card, and then the inevitable panic as you receive one from someone you didn't send one to. Meh. I'll send a text or call to whoever I care to keep in contact with.

donegal_man · 12-11-2019 12:11am

They must still be pretty popular given the number of producers and shops selling them.
On a sentimental note, you can't go through your old texts the way you can the Christmas cards that still mean something to you. I still have the first cards my children wrote and the one my parents sent when I was living in a cold apartment in London and had to work over Christmas while the lads I shared with headed home to Galway and Newcastle.

Potential-Monke · 12-11-2019 12:16am

You can just as easily print them out, and make it look pretty enough if you want, to hang/keep in their place.

wexandproud · 12-11-2019 7:53am

myself and the wife send a couple of dozen every year to family and close friends . Used to send a lot more years ago but have gradually made the list shorter .
People we would send a card to but would never give you a ring or call in to see if you were still alive during the year ,have been whittled out .

blueshade · 12-11-2019 12:27pm

The sad part is the list shortens every year as the older generation passes.

Christmas Cards: do you still write them?

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