Feeling exhausted all the time - in 50s

Hannaho · 08-07-2019 10:06pm #1

Hi! I am working hours per week in my 50s - have to - single parent of teens, but I'm exhausted, I feel tired all the time. On my days off I just catch up with stuff at home. The only thing I do for myself on my days off is swimming - I swim on the three days I am off, but other from that, I am completely exhausted all the time, too tired to phone a friend, or often to cook when I come home from working 12hrs. I have had my bloods checked recently, and they are fine, including my thyroid, as I have Thyroid/Hashimoto's disease. My question is: am I supposed to feel this way in my 50s? Do other women feel like this in their 50s? I need to keep working, but feel so dreadful, I don't know how I am going to do this/ Any advice/thoughts on this would be really welcome.

Infernal Racket · 08-07-2019 10:07pm

Would it be the change I wonder?

Hannaho · 08-07-2019 10:12pm

Yes, definitely likely, but I don't have any of the other more common symptoms, and if it is the change/menopause, I'm quite happy to be done with that part of my life. However, If it's part of the change and the exhaustion continues, I don't know how I will cope.

Fakediamond · 08-07-2019 10:49pm

If you’re on Facebook, join the group thyroid Ireland, there’s loads of advice there on dealing with hashimoto’s. In a nutshell, you’re meds might be ineffective, even if your blood results are good.

It also sounds like you have a busy life so you’re probably naturally tired from working two jobs, paid and unpaid!

Do you take supplements? At a minimum, I would recommend vit B and D.

antix80 · 08-07-2019 10:55pm

Hannaho, I can't say what other women feel like, but you have 3 days off.
There's no reason your teens can't do at least their fair share of the housework. That includes laundry and cooking. Give them 0 money if they can't pull their own weight to the extent they don't even eat if they don't do chores.
You need to manage your household yourself if you're single and that includes using all resources on hand!

Dial Hard · 09-07-2019 12:46am

Get a cleaner. Seriously, it's the best thing you will ever do for your free time.

antix80 · 09-07-2019 1:01am

She'll probably work another 2 hours on Saturdays to pay for the cleaner.
Also cleaners don't cook, or load the dishwasher after every meal.

Hannaho · 09-07-2019 6:31am

Yes, I can't afford a cleaner. Cleaner's where I am in Dublin are 16-17 euros an hour!!

antix80 · 09-07-2019 8:12am

Hannaho wrote: »

Yes, I can't afford a cleaner. Cleaner's where I am in Dublin are 16-17 euros an hour!!

Op.. your kids are the key. Are there 3 of you? That's 30 mins housework a day each, or 1.5 hours a day for you.
An hour each at the weekend, or your Saturday morning.

Don't iron clothes if you can help it. Buy clothes that dont wrinkle easy, and finish clothes in the tumble drier and fold them on removal. 90% of clothes won't need to be ironed.
Dishwasher is king.
When cooking, throw loads of stuff in the oven. Pork chops, full chicken, burgers, tuna pasta bake. Cook prepared veg in microwave. You'll have food for 3 days instead of just 1 and very little preparation.

wiggle16 · 09-07-2019 11:10am

I agree with antix80, if you have teens at home then there's no reason at all why you should be doing everything yourself, or needing a cleaner. If they are school age then they are off for the summer, you shouldn't be coming home to a house that needs cleaning or catching up on your days off. If they are not pulling their weight, they need to get the finger out.

Set a list of things that need to be done by the time you get home and allocate a couple of them to each of your kids. If your kids are young adults then they should be doing dinners at least a couple of times a week too. And if they are working then they need to start handing up if they aren't already. You're in your 50s, the part of your life where you are running a house single handedly is over, or should be.

Just on ironing, hanging up clothes in the bathroom while you're having a shower also saves on ironing, it takes the heavy creases out of them. I never understood people who iron everything, it's a waste of time!

To be honest I would be following up further with your GP as this sounds like a bit more than just burn-out, especially if it came on suddenly. With the bloods, did you get your iron checked? Low iron will completely drain you, that was the first thing I thought of when I read your post.

Professor Moriarty · 09-07-2019 12:53pm

Did they check your B12 when they did your bloods? If not, get it checked.

ManOfMystery · 09-07-2019 1:09pm

Assuming there's nothing medically at fault, I'd be looking at your diet and sleep patterns. Do you snore? You may think you're getting enough sleep but if you had (for example) sleep apnea then that would greatly affect your sleep and you wouldn't even be aware for the most part. There's apps you can get on your phone which will help you monitor your sleep during the night, it's probably worth checking.

On the diet side, it's probably worth looking at the foods you're eating and making sure you're well hydrated also. There are some foods which will really help energy levels and maybe you're not getting enough of these in your diet.

Hannaho · 09-07-2019 5:53pm

Thanks for all the replies - very helpful - especially hints re buying more time with cleaning and ironing. I have three teens with me now - one is being fostered by me for a year for a cousin who is unwell but is recovering. I have insisted they do more recently and they are improving. Re ironing, I need to get rid of that, so finishing off in the dryer is a good idea. Re bloods - just had them all done, including iron and thyroid, and all fine. I exericse, and my diet is farily good - I don't drink or smoke. I do, I'm told, snore, from time to time, though not every night and not loudly, but maybe I can explore this with my G.P.

MissShihTzu · 09-07-2019 7:11pm

How's your diet, OP? Do you sleep well? I underwent a TAH and put on SO much weight! I too was tired all the time and couldn't summon the energy for anything!

I've lost 2.5 stone and on HRT. It has totally done the trick! It won't work for everybody, but explore your options. I would also try Magnesium to help with the energy levels. Still get tired but I am much better than I was.

shesty · 09-07-2019 8:43pm

I remember being 16, my mother at work, me on school holidays...and being left with a list of instructions every day about a variety of things such as about ironing, dishes, washing clothes and hoovering/polishing once a week.

Not that long ago either, it was the 90s!!So start leaving instructions..You don't help out-you don't get lifts anywhere or spending money.

As a working mother myself btw, I don't iron regularly.Gave up on that ages ago.Work shirts etc. build up and I iron them about once a month.Clothes are folded directly off the clothes horse.My kids are still small, but my parents definitely closed the doors on our rooms once we turned a certain age, they weren't in hoovering and cleaning, and we generally managed our own clothes washes.

Divide out the work.It's good for them :-)

Feeling exhausted all the time - in 50s

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