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New words for 2008

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  • 15-01-2008 6:24pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 203 ✭✭


    * SALAD DODGER.
    An excellent phrase for an overweight person.

    * SWAMP-DONKEY
    A deeply unattractive person.

    * TESTICULATING.
    Waving your arms around and talking b**l**ks.

    * BLAMESTORMING.
    Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

    * SEAGULL MANAGER.
    A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and Then leaves.

    * ASSMOSIS.
    The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.

    * SALMON DAY.
    The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.

    * CUBE FARM.
    An office filled with cubicles.

    * PRAIRIE DOGGING.
    When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)

    * SITCOMs.
    Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a "home business".

    * SINBAD.
    Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.

    * AEROPLANE BLONDE.
    One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

    * PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
    The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

    * ADMINISPHERE.
    The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. This is often affiliated with the dreaded "administrivia" - needless paperwork and processes.

    * GOING FOR A Mcsh*t.
    Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is known as a Mcsh*t with Lies.

    * 404.
    Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found" meaning that the requested document could not be located.

    * AUSSIE KISS.
    Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

    * OH - NO SECOND.
    That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just Made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all').

    * GREYHOUND.
    A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

    * JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
    A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training.

    * MILLENNIUM DOMES.
    The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from The outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.

    * MONKEY BATH .
    A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: "Oo! Oo! Oo! Aa! Aa! Aa!".

    * MYSTERY BUS.
    The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

    * MYSTERY TAXI.
    The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10 Pinter in your bed instead.

    * BEER COAT.
    The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise At 3:00am.

    * BEER COMPASS.
    The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you've come from.

    * BREAKING THE SEAL.
    Your first pee in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.

    * TART FUEL.
    Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women.

    * PICASSO BUM.
    A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's Got 4 buttocks.


Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 2,746 ✭✭✭Drag00n79


    Excellent! :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭dak


    lol Stars !


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,967 ✭✭✭Pyr0


    Hahaha they are class !!


  • Registered Users Posts: 943 ✭✭✭Enright


    the best in a long while

    have some stars


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,563 ✭✭✭patmac


    Enright wrote: »
    the best in a long while

    have some stars

    .


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,693 ✭✭✭Jack Sheehan


    I thought of one the other day actually:
    An Idjury

    Thats an injury caused purely by your own idiocy. It came to me when I fell over a curb drunk.


  • Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,435 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    LOL @ Tart fuel :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 82 ✭✭Mister Fister


    heard em before you JOHNNY-NO-STARS.


  • Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Brilliant!:D


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,869 ✭✭✭Mahatma coat


    * PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
    The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

    used to call this one Percussive engineering when I was a tech.

    but my fave for this is still

    Applied Kinnetics :D


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,322 ✭✭✭Mad_Max


    *insert greyhound and picasso bum into vocab*

    Brilliant. If they get mentioned in a few more documents they can get put into the dictionary i believe! spread the words :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,625 ✭✭✭AngryHippie


    Funny, but no stars for you, changin the year was a stroke of genuis


  • Registered Users Posts: 748 ✭✭✭It BeeMee


    Thought of another one last night:

    FROMENT - (Frozen Moment) : The time between slamming the fridge door shut, and opening it again to investigate what caused that crashing sound inside...


  • Registered Users Posts: 990 ✭✭✭rosboy


    Brilliant!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,521 ✭✭✭rocky25


    It BeeMee wrote: »
    Thought of another one last night:

    FROMENT - (Frozen Moment) : The time between slamming the fridge door shut, and opening it again to investigate what caused that crashing sound inside...
    Brill:)


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,700 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    I thought of one the other day actually:
    An Idjury

    Thats an injury caused purely by your own idiocy. It came to me when I fell over a curb drunk.

    iandury, what happens if you get hit by a Rhythm Stick


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