Would you leave a stressful job for a reduction in pay?

10-07-2020 11:02pm #1

Really curious how others feel about this and if anyone has done this.

Work in the Analytics sector and got promoted to a project management/supervisory role about a year ago. The raise was brilliant to the point myself and herself have been able to comfortably put a deposit away.

The trade of is the amount of workload and hours have drastically increased and the stress has been impacting my personal life in terms of being able to switch off and not let it affect me out of hours (I have raised this internally numerous times but my line management has just as much work as I do). I'm also a natural introvert and so probably not a good mix in a role where 50-60% of your time is meetings and calls.

I'm genuinely considering moving to something similar to my old role of delivering projects and coding away with the extent of interactions being an occasional presentation or a team catchup. I know the pay will be less but we're in a good spot financially that it shouldn't affect us negatively , just slow down the rate of saving.

Has anyone else ever been in such a situation? I'd love to know what you did if you decided to go for somewhere you'd be happier or stuck it out to grow and adapt

Sorry for a longer post

Jim2007 · 11-07-2020 12:03am

You spend a larger portion of your time at work, so if on the whole it is not something you are happy doing and you can afford to change, then I don't see why you'd continue to be unhappy....

11-07-2020 12:06am

Fair point, I suppose it's largely based on fear of wasting an opportunity. But even as I type that it sounds a bit trivial

antimatterx · 11-07-2020 12:10am

If you’re trying to getting house, I’d stay put until you get. You’ll get a bigger mortgage with more income, along with more savings. Move job when you get yourself house, at least then the banks can’t take the mortgage away from you.

JustAThought · 11-07-2020 12:12am

Yes and No.

There is stress everywhere in many jobs but different types of stress - nightmare managers, impossible multi dependent deadlines, lack of resources, ambigious and multiple conflicting reports . I’ve taken big pay hits for far lower stress jobs but there are always different stresses that present themselves in different organisations. Maybe instead of packing in the role could you look at seeing how you manage the stress and deal /try to manage a bit better the issues or people that are causing you this trouble. Jobs will be much harder to come by now, and well paying jobs that are semi secure even less so.

If you are working at home and cocooned away from the people/environment will this take some of the burden off you for a start. Might help at least in pushing deadlines further out and managing time better as well perhaps as having to interface less with people and being able to plan and manage your communications transactions with them better. And with prompts in the side they cannot see from their zoom screens!

Grudaire · 11-07-2020 12:14am

Debating making the same jump now myself :O

Often the additional stress isn't compensated, and if work is affecting your personal life (and you don't need the extra cash) then why would you not choose the better work life balance...?

I'm trying to use my current job as a springboard into a role that is suitably interesting as well as being less "all-in"

mojesius · 11-07-2020 12:18am

Bit of a basic question but do you delegate as much work as you can in your new role? I'm an introvert and also work as a project lead and used to be completely stressed, working long hours all the time. I eventually realised that I used to do far too much of the work myself that could have been done a lot quicker/better by others, but just wasn't involving them when needed.

Jucifer · 11-07-2020 12:30am

It is really hard to say. I’m similar role at similar level but a few years at it now. Found it very tough at first and at times it is still stressful. I considered trying to get back to a non managerial role again but then bought house and children arrived so I wasn’t going anywhere.

Doesn’t seem quite as stressful any more and I do what I can in the hours I have available. Small babies are great at helping you shut off and sleep at night as well as putting a limit on working hours. It helps also that my team haven’t changed much for last couple of years so I know them and trust them.

This probably isn’t very helpful but a combination of a bit of getting used to the role, a bit more confidence in my value to the organisation and getting better at saying no (or rather not now) to work that isn’t possible given current workload have helped me a lot. I know that isn’t always possible due to organisational and senior management culture so this is only my experience.

andrew1977 · 11-07-2020 12:34am

Yes I have left a job with better salary due to the constant overseas travel / late night working / early morning driving around the country to other offices .
Sitting in a hotel near an industrial estate on a Tuesday night , the novelty soon wears off .

5 years later , less stressful job , less wages but 100% much happier in myself in my professional and personal life .

Jucifer · 11-07-2020 12:39am

mojesius wrote: »

Bit of a basic question but do you delegate as much work as you can in your new role? I'm an introvert and also work as a project lead and used to be completely stressed, working long hours all the time. I eventually realised that I used to do far too much of the work myself that could have been done a lot quicker/better by others, but just wasn't involving them when needed.

This also, getting too involved in every project means you become a bottleneck for your team. Trust others on team to manage relationships and go to meetings in your place. Use team members to validate/ test others work. If you are only half delegating projects then your team will be over reliant on you to make decisions constantly and check work and you will feel like you are trying to keep a hundred balls in the air. Speaking from experience.

Lu Tze · 11-07-2020 7:38am

I'm in the same boat, just waiting on a job offer to come in, and have another interview next week. I'm looking at a 50% paycut to move, but the workload has been too much for too long it's not sustainable, along with being in a constantly raised anxiety/stress level.

Finally realised it's not worth it, I'll end up back in hospital eventually if I kept going. New role will provide different challenges in a different industry, but more support and training. I'm the only one doing what I do currently in the company worldwide so as mentioned by a previous poster you become the bottleneck on projects adding to the stress and long hours.

deathbomber · 11-07-2020 8:26am

Lu Tze wrote: »

I'm in the same boat, just waiting on a job offer to come in, and have another interview next week. I'm looking at a 50% paycut to move, but the workload has been too much for too long it's not sustainable, along with being in a constantly raised anxiety/stress level.

Finally realised it's not worth it, I'll end up back in hospital eventually if I kept going. New role will provide different challenges in a different industry, but more support and training. I'm the only one doing what I do currently in the company worldwide so as mentioned by a previous poster you become the bottleneck on projects adding to the stress and long hours.

50% pay cut is drastic to say the least but if manageable, go for it.
I am all for a work/life balance but also realistic. I wouldn't move into a job without careful consideration, so unlikely to be stung with longer hours. At the end of the day, your well being is far more important, a bit of OT is ok with me be it paid or unpaid but if it was becoming a regular occurrence, i would start doing my work hours(strictly) only and let the circumstances come and simply explain my position when the time came. At the end of the day, if you keel over and x you will be replaced

pwurple · 11-07-2020 8:38am

How much worse did it get in Covid times?

Is it temporary is what I mean?

In my job, we were all feeling overwhelmed with communication. We ran analysis on the volume of emails, meetings and calls people are making since lockdown Vs last year. Email had more than doubled, meetings up by about 50% and phonecalls up by 25%.

I certainly feel it, I'm on a meeting , someone is pinging me and the emails are flying in. But , am hoping it will settle down in a year.

Tio07 · 11-07-2020 8:39am

I had that decision to make, I pushed for promotion with the view to saving and getting a mortgage. So I had the decent pay and stress Levels went through the roof added with a long commute.

Eventually I realised the money wasn’t worth it, I wasn’t valued and I was overworked. I made the decision to take a job closer to home and a massive pay cut. It was so worth it. The family time I gained was worth more then any amount of money.

A few months later a new opportunity came my way and now I have a decent wage in a job I really like and the work life balance that suits having young kids.

I’m glad I took the decision to dump the stress.

I would say tho if you are almost there with the deposit I’d stick it out and I’d get the mortgage, your free then to get a role you enjoy more.

Lu Tze · 11-07-2020 8:43am

deathbomber wrote: »

50% pay cut is drastic to say the least but if manageable, go for it.
I am all for a work/life balance but also realistic. I wouldn't move into a job without careful consideration, so unlikely to be stung with longer hours. At the end of the day, your well being is far more important, a bit of OT is ok with me be it paid or unpaid but if it was becoming a regular occurrence, i would start doing my work hours(strictly) only and let the circumstances come and simply explain my position when the time came. At the end of the day, if you keel over and x you will be replaced

It's is a major paycut, but it's a very interesting opportunity in a completely different role. Just need to trim the outgoings a bit and should be fine.

8 consecutive months working most weekends with no overtime etc. Just to get projects completed on time. The capacity to do that indefinitely just isn't there. It's partly how the industry operates, hence moving my industry as opposed to just changing job.

The interview coming up is for a position I would also consider, not as big a change of role/industry but only ~10% paycut to move. On paper it's the better job right now,

Wanderer78 · 11-07-2020 8:46am

Kalico92 wrote:

Really curious how others feel about this and if anyone has done this.

Walk away, your mental health will thank you, life's too short, best of luck

Duke of Url · 11-07-2020 8:50am

Yes I have before.

It was so bad that I was saying up so late on week nights as I need once I fell asleep I’d be waking up having to go into work.

Took an initial 15K pay cut to join another company in a different role. Been happily working for the last 6 years in a job I love earn a lot more now then I could have in the other job

I

harr · 11-07-2020 8:56am

I would say move jobs , was in similar position many years ago. I was doing 12 hour shift work with travel times of nearly 90 minutes in between. So I was going from bed to work for 3 years with little or no family/ social life.
The job I was in was mind numbing with days on end where I would have no work .. so 12 hours of sitting around doing nothing, maintenance role so had to be on site.
We were saving for our first house and the money was ridiculously good at the time so I felt huge pressure to stay , mental health really started to suffer , so put house on hold and left the role for a job nearer home and day work.
Best decision I made , money was tight for a while but eventually got our house but most importantly I got my life back .

clappyhappy · 11-07-2020 9:03am

I worked in a senior position for 4 months, but the manager was the most vile, horrible person I've come across, hated going into work each morning, the way she spoke to staff was unbelievable, I could stand up for myself but the atmosphere was septic. Decided to resign, couldn't stay there, workload was immense and stress of her had me not sleeping. Financially it was going to be tough, but the night I resigned I was offered another job, been there 4 and a half years, absolutely love it and now on more money that before. She finally got fired about 6 months after I left, think my letter to senior management might have helped.

nutjobb · 11-07-2020 9:13am

No amount of money is worth putting up with that. It is extremely hard to walk away from good money but remember your mental health is most important.

Take 2 weeks off for yourself to think about everything. That's what I did and did me the world of good. Now I did have good communication with my manager too which helped but maybe that's not possible in your case.

I wish you well anyway and remember there are many service out there where you can discuss in confidence how you are feeling, could be helpful.

11-07-2020 9:39am

Thanks very much for the replies folks, really interesting to hear different takes on it but also really helpful to hear experiences of others

Jim2007 · 11-07-2020 9:40am

Kalico92 wrote: »

Fair point, I suppose it's largely based on fear of wasting an opportunity. But even as I type that it sounds a bit trivial

Wasting an opportunity to be happy, now that would be a waste...

Jim2007 · 11-07-2020 9:44am

antimatterx wrote: »

If you’re trying to getting house, I’d stay put until you get. You’ll get a bigger mortgage with more income, along with more savings. Move job when you get yourself house, at least then the banks can’t take the mortgage away from you.

Why? Do you think a big house with a mortgage is going to compensate for having to work long hours over a longer period doing a job you hate...

SnowyMay · 11-07-2020 9:45am

Jucifer wrote: »

This also, getting too involved in every project means you become a bottleneck for your team. Trust others on team to manage relationships and go to meetings in your place. Use team members to validate/ test others work. If you are only half delegating projects then your team will be over reliant on you to make decisions constantly and check work and you will feel like you are trying to keep a hundred balls in the air. Speaking from experience.

This is so true re. learning to delegate.

I was shít at it for years when I moved into a Team Lead, and then senior management role. I would work 100 hour weeks easily, which was completely idiotic. I lived to work.

I’m now in a similar role, but have no hesitation in handing over tasks to colleagues. It’s also good for their development (although I still am guilty of hand-holding at the start!).

But now, I generally work 9 - 6, and, if something spectacular happens, I get that old rush and will pull an all nighter. But once a month, not every night!

It feels much better. And that crazy work is not sustainable. The adrenaline wears out sooner or later, and this is where burnout occurs.

I won’t lie - I loved the time I spent living and breathing work, but there’s a time when you need to stop that, and, believe me, I experienced it when it all caught up on me!

Get out before you burnout!

Shefwedfan · 11-07-2020 9:46am

antimatterx wrote: »

If you’re trying to getting house, I’d stay put until you get. You’ll get a bigger mortgage with more income, along with more savings. Move job when you get yourself house, at least then the banks can’t take the mortgage away from you.

F**k me that is terrible advice

You should never buy a house outside your means

leinsterdude · 11-07-2020 9:47am

Its just a job, get out of there if it is affecting you, I got a really well paid middle manager job, which I thought would do me for life, but my new boss made my life a nightmare, lasted 2.5 years, but it really affected my well being, left without a new job as he challenged me/embarrassed my during a group meeting, but glad I left, now I am in a smaller company, and work locally, with slightly less pay, but I am happy.

Shefwedfan · 11-07-2020 9:47am

Jim2007 wrote: »

Why? Do you think a big house with a mortgage is going to compensate for having to work long hours over a longer period doing a job you hate...

Plus if they get bigger mortgage, then larger repayment which means staying in the job longer and more stress and then more stress trying to make the repayment

Stay for a while and get a deposit but get a mortgage based on older wage

listermint · 11-07-2020 9:49am

antimatterx wrote: »

If you’re trying to getting house, I’d stay put until you get. You’ll get a bigger mortgage with more income, along with more savings. Move job when you get yourself house, at least then the banks can’t take the mortgage away from you.

Getting a bigger mortgage is the idiots advice on life.

Don't listen to this

Life is extremely short you won't be dreaming of how you landed the big one from Bank of Ireland when your lying on your death bed.

Don't waste your time in jobs that are hurting you. It diminishes your health and can shorten your life. Stress is actually quite a big killer.

Elessar · 11-07-2020 10:09am

Just to add my own 2 cents...leave the stressful job. Period.

I've been in a similar situation and I know how hard it is to quit, especially if you earn a decent wage. But stress like you're describing just isn't worth it, like at all. Maybe some people are suited to it but like you I would be a natural introvert and stress really does make me miserable. Life is short - what do you think you'll be thinking when you're on your death bed and looking back over your life? God I wish I had spent more time in that job that stressed me up to my eyeballs?

I'm mid 30s now and the older I get the more I am seeing the value in a good work life balance and as less stress as possible. I work in a role where it's practically stress free, I'm home at 4.30 every day and once I'm finished, I'm finished until the next day. I could easily get a role elsewhere for more money but the value of this environment and it's proximity to my home is worth more to me. I really don't want stress in my life so I'm happy for now.

Once you get into a role where it's less stressful, even if the pay is slightly less, you'll thank yourself. Believe me. Life is short, look after yourself, you deserve to be happy in what you do.

EDIT: Just to add, it's possible to earn a good wage and not be stressed out too - I know because I do it!

CBear1993 · 11-07-2020 10:23am

Brilliant thread OP, and great contributions on here as well, all positive and addressing the concerns of OP! These are the threads which address real life important issues. Can relate so much. Its mad that people in tbeir 20s/early 30s are having conversations like this now about work, before I entered I thought work stress was for 40/50 year olds.

I’ve worked on the professional side of construction for main contractors (I say professional with a chuckle, some cowboys in this sector) and the stress is terrible for all the different roles, PM/QS/Engineer. I’ve looked at switching over to the consultancy side and minding the clients’ money from the contractor, but I’ve seen where they have just as much stress and long hours.

I’m now setting my sights on a public sector role or with a semi state body where you really do finish at 4/4:30 each day. If there’s little to no overtime and you aren’t in a constant ball of stress before you even enter the office every day to deal with assholes then it will be worth its weight in gold for me. I’ll take a €20K paycut for that

Have explored changing sector as I’m still young, going back and studying again to get into pharma /IT/Finance but from speaking to others in these industries you could just as easily end up in a similar environment. It would take me the guts of another 6/7 years before I’d realise that.

So I’ll go public/government owned side and hope it’s better off!!

dubrov · 11-07-2020 11:05am

Plenty of people move jobs to lower salaries in order to get a better work/life balance.

I've never heard of anyone regretting it.

The tax man takes such a large chunk anyway you may not find yourself that much worse off financially.

Would you leave a stressful job for a reduction in pay?

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