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Whats your story

2»

Comments

  • #52
    I Am Nobody
    Closed Accounts Posts: 726 ✭✭✭I Am Nobody


    Since this has mostly been a piss take.Which I understand from a internet forum.Fair enough,but how many of you brave posters will post something from your real life?


  • #53
    mariaalice
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,619 ✭✭✭✭mariaalice


    Got married the first time at 19 to a man much older than me, we had two children, we separated and then divorced he has ended up an elderly lonely eccentric who calls into me and my second husband every now and then, he had to ask me to collect him from the hospital and the air coach because he had no else to ask. He has lot of regrets about how he has live his life but too late now. I feel sorry for him now.

    I got married again at 47 to someone I met on a dating site and we are extremely happy and have a great life.

    There is loads of other stuff as well.


  • #54
    Vestiapx
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,189 ✭✭✭Vestiapx


    CBear1993 wrote: »
    The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
    Someone did that one already


  • #55
    Church on Tuesday
    Registered Users Posts: 3,858 ✭✭✭Church on Tuesday


    I'll give my life story in a couple decades time.

    At 33 I haven't even really started yet.


  • #56
    Vestiapx
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,189 ✭✭✭Vestiapx


    I Am Nobody wrote: »
    Since this has mostly been a piss take.Which I understand from a internet forum.Fair enough,but how many of you brave posters will post something from your real life?

    Which MC are you a member of?


  • #57
    mariaalice
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,619 ✭✭✭✭mariaalice


    I know a few who have had very interesting and unusual lives, but you would never think it when you meet met them.


  • #58
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    I live a very normal, boring life which I'm more than happy with


  • #59
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    I Am Nobody wrote: »
    A gamey leg,sticky tits and now a love of Tequila.Your not really boasting your strong points.!

    I just hope she's not fegs twin sister, if so shesshe's ****ed and I don't mean with a cock


  • #60
    ExMachina1000
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,748 ✭✭✭ExMachina1000


    Man with broke phone wrote: »
    I was once a plumber. I started installing air conditioning about 6 years ago. I stumbled on BMI and how to apply it to business soon after. I started moulding my team based solely on their BMI. Overtime and pay rises and all the good jobs were given to team members with good BMI. I had a crew of 8 people, 3 left the company, the rest honed their BMI to perfect. Sick days stopped completely, the few that smoked gave up, we didnt need to replace the 3 people that left because productivity improved. Boss was so happy he had me implement these changes to the whole install then maintenance and service divisions of the company.
    We now have 70 per cent of the staff but income was up to 160 per cent of original when I got a job offer from a global manufacturer.
    We started last year implementing these changes in the air conditioning product factories with great success, I spent most of last year on the other side of the world and I'm expecting my role to expand across the whole company. Thousands of people around the world having their BMI monitored. It's like a dream for me.
    I'm so busy that I barely have time to check my own BMI, but I make time, I love nothing more than measuring my height then weighing myself, then doing my victory dance when I am to the decimal point perfect. Not a gram out of place. Every calorie accounted for, minimal waste, one poop break a day at 6 am before I get dressed. Comes out like a ghost, spotless tissue, perfect human being, efficient naked pooping. I met a guy a few weeks ago who knew me from my past, he said I look exactly the same what's my secret, BMI.

    I like your moxy kid


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  • #61
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    My life story is a shadowy flight into the world of a man who does not exist.....

    A young loner on a crusade to champion the cause of the innocent - something something someting

    In a world of criminals who operate above the law.

    Damn I thought I would remember more of it :)


  • #62
    I Am Nobody
    Closed Accounts Posts: 726 ✭✭✭I Am Nobody


    Vestiapx wrote: »
    Which MC are you a member of?

    Won't be sharing that on the internet!


  • #63
    iamstop
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,536 Mod ✭✭✭✭iamstop


    I used to have a little, now I have a lot. But I'm still just Stop. from the block.

    https://open.spotify.com/album/69JKwCcZGdLqX4Upj3DwP7



  • #64
    I Am Nobody
    Closed Accounts Posts: 726 ✭✭✭I Am Nobody


    iamstop wrote: »
    I used to have a little, now I have a lot. But I'm still just Stop. from the block.

    Thank you Jenny from the block,for your contribution.


  • #65
    odyssey06
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32,174 ✭✭✭✭odyssey06


    Some of my colleagues come from thousands of miles away...
    I'm reared in D3, first permanent job was in D3 and still living and working in D3. I can see my office from my road.
    I don't just live in a place I inhabit it.

    "To follow knowledge like a sinking star..." (Tennyson's Ulysses)



  • #66
    stratowide
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 566 ✭✭✭stratowide


    Think I'll pack it all in and just wander the earth like Kane in Kung Fu.

    Might get into a few adventures along the way.


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  • #67
    mzungu
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,309 Mod ✭✭✭✭mzungu


    This is my boss, Joanthan Hart, a self-made millionaire, he's quite a guy. This is Mrs H., she's gorgeous, she's one lady who knows how to take care of herself. By the way my name is Max. I take care of both of them, which ain't easy cause when they met it was murder


  • #68
    Montage of Feck
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,700 ✭✭✭Montage of Feck


    Morning glory?

    🙈🙉🙊



  • #69
    Junkyard Tom
    Registered Users Posts: 10,117 ✭✭✭✭Junkyard Tom


    In 1972, I was part of crack commando unit that was sent to prison by a military court for a crime we didn't commit. We promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government we survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find us....maybe you can hire The J-Team.


  • #70
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    Junkyard Tom wrote: »
    In 1972, I was part of crack commando unit that was sent to prison by a military court for a crime we didn't commit. We promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government we survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find us....maybe you can hire The J-Team.

    Do not hire the J-Team. They don't pay you proper wages, I flew the space shuttle for them on the last mission and Mr J paid me 3euro and 75cent. It wasn't enough to get a big mac meal. What do we want equal pay. Mr J equal pay.


  • #71
    I Am Nobody
    Closed Accounts Posts: 726 ✭✭✭I Am Nobody


    Ok now that I get the gist of things,here is my story.I was a sea captain who sailed the 7 seas and fought off attacks from Somalia pirates who were after my cargo of rare antiques and bullion gold.How was that?


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  • #72
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    I Am Nobody wrote: »
    Ok now that I get the gist of things,here is my story.I was a sea captain who sailed the 7 seas and fought off attacks from Somalia pirates who were after my cargo of rare antiques and bullion gold.How was that?

    Well, Mr lying drug pusher just so you know that captain was an uncle of mine, he had 28 children yes 28, ( they had no television and he was a good practising catholic). Well the stress of you fighting him off and the unsuccessful mission cause the poor man to have a heart attack and die yes die. So while your bragging to your friends how you saved the day my uncle is worm food. Oh and from what I heard it wasn't gold bullion or antiques on your boat but drugs, and I also heard you were whimpering in the cabin when they came aboard. My uncle lord rest him said you were offering blowies and your arsehole to his men. It was only the navy scuppered my uncles plans. Now you Mr hero. Hope your happy 28 children left behind.


  • #73
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    Deleted User wrote: »
    My life story is a shadowy flight into the world of a man who does not exist.....

    A young loner on a crusade to champion the cause of the innocent - something something someting


    In a world of criminals who operate above the law.

    Damn I thought I would remember more of it :)

    Its ok its the drugs it happens to me a lot


  • #74
    I Am Nobody
    Closed Accounts Posts: 726 ✭✭✭I Am Nobody


    Kylta wrote: »
    Well, Mr lying drug pusher just so you know that captain was an uncle of mine, he had 28 children yes 28, ( they had no television and he was a good practising catholic). Well the stress of you fighting him off and the unsuccessful mission cause the poor man to have a heart attack and die yes die. So while your bragging to your friends how you saved the day my uncle is worm food. Oh and from what I heard it wasn't gold bullion or antiques on your boat but drugs, and I also heard you were whimpering in the cabin when they came aboard. My uncle lord rest him said you were offering blowies and your arsehole to his men. It was only the navy scuppered my uncles plans. Now you Mr hero. Hope your happy 28 children left behind.

    I worked hard on that backstory and here you are making it much more complicated than it needs to be.Feck it I'll come up with a solid one impervious to ridicule.


  • #75
    Blush_01
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,016 ✭✭✭Blush_01


    I sat on a rainbow once and skittles popped out. Fact.

    Also they have no flavour, it's a psychological mindf*ck. I used that technology to make my fortune, and after I sold the method to the MARS company, I retired to an island off the west coast.

    Some day soon 3 will bring wifi to my island, and I'll set up my remote working hub, where I'll make topical memes and distribute them free of charge to underprivileged millennials. I'm philanthropic like that.


  • #76
    Wanderer78
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,906 ✭✭✭✭Wanderer78


    The end


  • #77
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    I Am Nobody wrote: »
    I worked hard on that backstory and here you are making it much more complicated than it needs to be.Feck it I'll come up with a solid one impervious to ridicule.

    Are you jesting. I was telling the truth. 28 children in all


  • #78
    I Am Nobody
    Closed Accounts Posts: 726 ✭✭✭I Am Nobody


    Kylta wrote: »
    Are you jesting. I was telling the truth. 28 children in all

    I was indeed.


  • #79
    Lewis_Benson
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,147 ✭✭✭Lewis_Benson


    Arghus wrote: »
    I thought one of the main purposes of the site was to lie about who we really are.

    I step in front of cars and sue the drivers.


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