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Internal Rhymes

2»

Comments

  • #52
    auspicious
    Registered Users Posts: 4,497 ✭✭✭auspicious


    Through the open door the postman took a look.
    Eyes wide he exclaimed " Holy ****!
    Get that checked. That's a disgrace!"
    I kicked the door closed in his face.


  • #53
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    I gazed down upon my belly
    It wobbled like a lump of jelly
    I knew what I had become
    When I realised I had a front bum
    I began to cry, wail and got sick
    All because I couldn't see my dick
    One it hung proud and loose
    Now it's just a sad recluse


  • #54
    the purple tin
    Registered Users Posts: 10,943 ✭✭✭✭the purple tin


    My neighbour popped in, for gossip to gather.
    What is it, she asked has you in a lather?
    I showed her my gut, the root of the ruction.
    That's nothin' says she. Just get liposuction.


  • #55
    auspicious
    Registered Users Posts: 4,497 ✭✭✭auspicious


    No way not a chance
    I'll just buy some larger pants.
    I stand tall and suck in me gut
    and before heading out grab the last doughnut.


  • #56
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    I cannot bend to tie my lace
    The rush of blood reddens my face
    My heart is pounding as I raise my head
    I crawl upstairs to find my bed
    On the stairs I grab my chest
    The pains so severe I do attest
    The ambulance is coming I hear a scream
    I awake to beep beep on a hospital machine


  • #57
    auspicious
    Registered Users Posts: 4,497 ✭✭✭auspicious


    Wow that nurse she's a looker
    Given the chance I'd surely,
    put her
    on my arm and give her some charm
    And hope it doesn't appear as complete smarm.


  • #58
    the purple tin
    Registered Users Posts: 10,943 ✭✭✭✭the purple tin


    What a face, what a bod. I think I'm in love
    She looks like an angel and coos like a dove
    When she comes around to check my heart-rate
    I pluck the courage and ask her out on a date


  • #59
    Day Lewin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,688 ✭✭✭Day Lewin


    Nothing worse than a nurse who is ravin' like a mavin
    Stranger than an angel, she changes the ranges
    of fever, pressure, pulse and asks (her task)
    to tell of smell or taste, lends an ear to hear
    a cough that reveals a feel of virus
    (Please don't fire us, will you hire us?)


  • #60
    auspicious
    Registered Users Posts: 4,497 ✭✭✭auspicious


    I pull out the drip and off I go
    placing my finger to stop the blood flow.
    I shake loose the nurse attached to my leg
    And head to a pub with a Guinness keg.


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  • #61
    Kylta
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,457 ✭✭✭✭Kylta


    UreIt been a long time, I'd a carven for wine
    The barkeep the pig wouldn't give me swig
    He cried 'Food you buy' you drunk little guy
    My funds they were tight, an idea did light
    barkeep 'it's food ill take but not on a plate'
    a nine euro bowl of wine, will do just fine


  • #62
    auspicious
    Registered Users Posts: 4,497 ✭✭✭auspicious


    Oh those days in which I could longingly gaze
    through foggy glasses across some welcome drunken masses.
    But now scanning alone at Tesco self-service
    surely 8pak Guinness is much too surplus.


  • #63
    iamstop
    Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 12,536 Mod ✭✭✭✭iamstop


    3 Cheers for the 8 craft beers,
    Drowning sorrows, no regret, forget about tomorrows.
    Find a mate to celebrate the date,
    Chugging cans from both hands before the time spans,
    to another day pissed away as it may.
    In the mood to order food from the dude,
    just don't be rude with an attitude
    Hazy daze with the IPAs that drains your pays.

    https://open.spotify.com/album/69JKwCcZGdLqX4Upj3DwP7



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