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BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder

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    #62
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    triona1 wrote: »
    On destruct watch,not harm/suicide have to wait till 4am to make sure all is safe.Im on 45mg of disperse zispin at night and it knocks me out.100mg of lustrul in the am.0.5 xanax x 4 daily and have a prn in case.never mind my bp tabs and nexum.

    I am hoping your night went well Triona. My heart goes out to you having to sit up all night alone waiting for something to happen. Plus you are struggling to hold it all together yourself, I know what thats like too. What about getting in touch with that lovely doctor again and asking him if he could refer your husband to a new guy? Your current one sounds a total ass and neither of you are getting any support.


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    #63
    triona1
    Registered Users Posts: 593 ✭✭✭triona1


    A quiet night in the end and a good day,Ive tried to get in contact its impossible.Honestly i think only i can deal with him,if i could write scripts id be great lol.
    Sure even when he does get to see his psych which is once in a blue moon its a quick chat/script off you go now.
    The junior psychs are much better there is one in particular that seems good but has not got a real push yet until maybe when he is a dr.


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    #64
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    triona1 wrote: »
    A quiet night in the end and a good day,Ive tried to get in contact its impossible.Honestly i think only i can deal with him,if i could write scripts id be great lol.
    Sure even when he does get to see his psych which is once in a blue moon its a quick chat/script off you go now.
    The junior psychs are much better there is one in particular that seems good but has not got a real push yet until maybe when he is a dr.

    I agree with you Triona, I think the younger guys have a passion at least to try to help/cure their patients and show a bit of enthusiasm. I am so glad you had a good night, I was worried about you today after reading that post. It is such a desperate situation to be in. I have never been that bad as my daughters OD's were out of the blue. However, whenever she was out of hospital we had the usual vigils, or rather 'I' did. No-one can describe that awfulness of lying awake and worrying whats to come, what could they do, and what will you find in the morning. You have had the worst situations I have heard of and I really don't know how you do it and cope. You are a remarkable woman and I pray you keep getting that inner strength.


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    #65
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    I am so glad I started this thread because I felt so alone as a carer of a BPD patient. There was so little BPD information out there in relation to Ireland, particularly to support groups - there are none that I know of. This forum in its short few weeks has shown that there are so many people suffering out there, whether they are carers or patients of BPD. Something needs to be done NOW. I have had tremendous support from lovely people on this forum with books and advice and I know it would help so many other people too. I really think you can't beat the power of human interaction though and a group meeting would be amazing. I am going to do some research in the coming week and try to come up with a city centre option and hopefully people could attend. I think the key is advertisement in all health centres throughout the Leinster area.

    I also would love to start a support group for BPD patients are they are the most important people in this equation. My daughter would love to relate to other people with the same issues and discuss treatments etc. So please don't feel this forum is a bitch fest against BPD patients. On the contrary, we want to make your lives easier too and hope you can share good treatments etc.

    All ideas are always welcome.


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    #66
    chinacup
    Registered Users Posts: 539 ✭✭✭chinacup


    RachelDDD wrote: »
    I am so glad I started this thread because I felt so alone as a carer of a BPD patient. There was so little BPD information out there in relation to Ireland, particularly to support groups - there are none that I know of. This forum in its short few weeks has shown that there are so many people suffering out there, whether they are carers or patients of BPD. Something needs to be done NOW. I have had tremendous support from lovely people on this forum with books and advice and I know it would help so many other people too. I really think you can't beat the power of human interaction though and a group meeting would be amazing. I am going to do some research in the coming week and try to come up with a city centre option and hopefully people could attend. I think the key is advertisement in all health centres throughout the Leinster area.

    I also would love to start a support group for BPD patients are they are the most important people in this equation. My daughter would love to relate to other people with the same issues and discuss treatments etc. So please don't feel this forum is a bitch fest against BPD patients. On the contrary, we want to make your lives easier too and hope you can share good treatments etc.

    All ideas are always welcome.

    It would be amazing if there was a meet up group. Seems nothing in the line of it in Dublin and it would be kind of nice to have something outside of the professional bounds, more informal and friendly. The opportunity to link in and make friends/contacts with others who have BPD (or those affected) would be great I think. Down the line if we were united we could potentially pool our resources too. For eg petition to get hse to do more for those affected by BPD, family and otherwise. Just throwing out thoughts as they come here. I'm BPD and have been following the thread haven't contributed much but sympathise with all of you posting big time!


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    #67
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    chinacup wrote: »
    It would be amazing if there was a meet up group. Seems nothing in the line of it in Dublin and it would be kind of nice to have something outside of the professional bounds, more informal and friendly. The opportunity to link in and make friends/contacts with others who have BPD (or those affected) would be great I think. Down the line if we were united we could potentially pool our resources too. For eg petition to get hse to do more for those affected by BPD, family and otherwise. Just throwing out thoughts as they come here. I'm BPD and have been following the thread haven't contributed much but sympathise with all of you posting big time!

    It's great to have input from an actual BPD sufferer and I agree a group would be fantastic. I am going to try to do a bit of research this week and find out how to organise a venue. I know the Mission Hall in Middle Abbey Street do a lot of meetings for various groups - AA, Al-anon, Weightwatchers etc. I will give them a call and see what the charges are and availability. Once a venue could be found, then its just a matter of advertising in Health Centres, CAMHS and online. It would be good to meet up with anyone who has some free time and thrash out some ideas. I know its tricky for a lot of people to attend, especially those who are carers or have young families. Further down the road we could get a Facebook page going so at least there is a forum online for people to get information & help. Get those thinking caps on and hopefully in a few weeks we can meet up for a coffee and see what we can come up with. Hope everyone is having a good weekend :)


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    #68
    catrin11
    Registered Users Posts: 30 ✭catrin11


    RachelDDD wrote: »
    It's great to have input from an actual BPD sufferer and I agree a group would be fantastic. I am going to try to do a bit of research this week and find out how to organise a venue. I know the Mission Hall in Middle Abbey Street do a lot of meetings for various groups - AA, Al-anon, Weightwatchers etc. I will give them a call and see what the charges are and availability. Once a venue could be found, then its just a matter of advertising in Health Centres, CAMHS and online. It would be good to meet up with anyone who has some free time and thrash out some ideas. I know its tricky for a lot of people to attend, especially those who are carers or have young families. Further down the road we could get a Facebook page going so at least there is a forum online for people to get information & help. Get those thinking caps on and hopefully in a few weeks we can meet up for a coffee and see what we can come up with. Hope everyone is having a good weekend :)

    Rachel, actually we may start from creating the page/group on Facebook. It can be close so people will be sure that whatever they say stays in the group. There is one I know of but it hasn't been updated for a while. We can start from that point (I think there are people out there who either need help or can offer some help), advertise it in that way and in the meantime search for place to meet up in reality. What do you say for that?


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    #69
    chinacup
    Registered Users Posts: 539 ✭✭✭chinacup


    RachelDDD wrote: »
    It's great to have input from an actual BPD sufferer and I agree a group would be fantastic. I am going to try to do a bit of research this week and find out how to organise a venue. I know the Mission Hall in Middle Abbey Street do a lot of meetings for various groups - AA, Al-anon, Weightwatchers etc. I will give them a call and see what the charges are and availability. Once a venue could be found, then its just a matter of advertising in Health Centres, CAMHS and online. It would be good to meet up with anyone who has some free time and thrash out some ideas. I know its tricky for a lot of people to attend, especially those who are carers or have young families. Further down the road we could get a Facebook page going so at least there is a forum online for people to get information & help. Get those thinking caps on and hopefully in a few weeks we can meet up for a coffee and see what we can come up with. Hope everyone is having a good weekend :)

    Thanks. Great, well if there's anything I can do let me know. Another place to advertise would be Samaratins and Aware if we get this going as I've heard a lot of people (including myself) with BPD or suspected BPD avail of these services. That's if we can get something going. As a matter of interest where are people based?


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    #70
    catrin11
    Registered Users Posts: 30 ✭catrin11


    chinacup wrote: »
    Thanks. Great, well if there's anything I can do let me know. Another place to advertise would be Samaratins and Aware if we get this going as I've heard a lot of people (including myself) with BPD or suspected BPD avail of these services. That's if we can get something going. As a matter of interest where are people based?

    I live in Dublin.... Good idea about Samaritans and Aware! :)


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    #71
    chinacup
    Registered Users Posts: 539 ✭✭✭chinacup


    catrin11 wrote: »
    I live in Dublin.... Good idea about Samaritans and Aware! :)

    Great. Just remembered meetup.ie there's a fee to create a group not sure how much but I think its minimal.


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    #72
    BPD_Patient
    Registered Users Posts: 5 ✭BPD_Patient


    I would be interested in a group / meet up and perhaps a facebook group, once it was a closed / secret group that didn't show up on my page as very few people in "real life" know I have BPD. I'd love some info on access to DBT and how people went about it.


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    #73
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    catrin11 wrote: »
    Rachel, actually we may start from creating the page/group on Facebook. It can be close so people will be sure that whatever they say stays in the group. There is one I know of but it hasn't been updated for a while. We can start from that point (I think there are people out there who either need help or can offer some help), advertise it in that way and in the meantime search for place to meet up in reality. What do you say for that?

    Sounds like a great idea Catrin. I am not on FB at all so not very techy in how to set up a page. It would be a good idea to have a couple of Administrators though and make the whole thing Private. Anonymity is a really important aspect to ensure everyone feels their privacy is respected. I would be willing to do Admin with someone if any clever clogs out there could set up the page and make it look professional. I think it should be called something like 'BPD Ireland' so anyone with a diagnosis and googling would easily find it.


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    #74
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    chinacup wrote: »
    Thanks. Great, well if there's anything I can do let me know. Another place to advertise would be Samaratins and Aware if we get this going as I've heard a lot of people (including myself) with BPD or suspected BPD avail of these services. That's if we can get something going. As a matter of interest where are people based?

    Those groups would be perfect and we could link into them via FB too and hopefully they would advertise for us. Another good one is Pieta House and we could also target local community centres & health centres too. I am based in Dublin, close to City Centre.


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    #75
    endacl
    Registered Users Posts: 22,232 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    Don't forget folks, that a private group on Facebook is only private to the public, if that makes sense. Facebook still gathers data from them. That's how the Facebook business model works.

    Just something to bear in mind when setting up a group around a difficult and sensitive topic. Nothing online is 'private'.


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    #76
    BPD_Patient
    Registered Users Posts: 5 ✭BPD_Patient


    I meant "private" in the sense that I don't want my friends list to be able to see that I'm a member of the group.

    The ridiculous lack of access to affordable DBT is ridiculous. Just putting it out there like - it's horrendous. I'm trying to "teach" myself DBT skills by listening to YouTube presentations on core skills, mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation and interpersonal effectiveness. I'm sure it's not the best way to go about things but currently few options are available to me.

    I must look to access some of the books that have been linked here. I've read all about mindfulness in different books by Jon Kabat Zinn.

    Today is a bad day. I'm very urgey. Unfortunately the therapist I've been linking in with is currently on holidays so I've nobody to talk to about my urges. Its times like this I really wish that people in "real life" knew so that I'd have some support :(


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    #77
    endacl
    Registered Users Posts: 22,232 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    It may be helpful to explore some other modalities that have had promising results in long term studies. This may be of interest to some.

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2816926/


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    #78
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    BPD_Patient wrote: »
    I meant "private" in the sense that I don't want my friends list to be able to see that I'm a member of the group.

    The ridiculous lack of access to affordable DBT is ridiculous. Just putting it out there like - it's horrendous. I'm trying to "teach" myself DBT skills by listening to YouTube presentations on core skills, mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation and interpersonal effectiveness. I'm sure it's not the best way to go about things but currently few options are available to me.

    I must look to access some of the books that have been linked here. I've read all about mindfulness in different books by Jon Kabat Zinn.

    Today is a bad day. I'm very urgey. Unfortunately the therapist I've been linking in with is currently on holidays so I've nobody to talk to about my urges. Its times like this I really wish that people in "real life" knew so that I'd have some support :(

    I totally agree with you. Ireland is in the dark ages when it comes to successful treatments such as DBT. There is only that one programme in Cork and a few scattered therapists around the country who have little experience. Anyone I contacted was reluctant to take my daughter on as its such a 'new' treatment. It's been around for years all over the world and the UK, have been implementing it in treatment programmes for over 25 years now. Why are we so backward at going forward in this country. No wonder the suicide statistics are so appalling. There are so many people out there crying out for help and there is none available.

    I also think its shocking that your therapist is away on holidays and has left you without a back up person for support. I think you are great for watching those videos on youtube and trying your best to get through this. I know it is so hard to fight those urges but I hope you have a friend or a family member who can try to help you through this patch. If you feel like you are losing control and at risk then I would definitely go to an A&E. I have been in this situation so many times and I know it has always helped my daughter, just a simple chat with a Pysch on call. I have found the Mater Hospital A&E have always been fantastic and so supportive whenever we have a crisis. My daughter has always said they were so understanding & wishes she could have been admitted there long term, rather than sent to an adolescent unit elsewhere. Please feel free to PM me any time. I know I am not a BPD patient but I have a small understanding of what you might be going through. Hang in there and be good to yourself.


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    #79
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    endacl wrote: »
    It may be helpful to explore some other modalities that have had promising results in long term studies. This may be of interest to some.

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2816926/

    Thanks for posting this link, I have never heard of this before and will definitely investigate it.


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    #80
    catrin11
    Registered Users Posts: 30 ✭catrin11


    endacl wrote: »
    It may be helpful to explore some other modalities that have had promising results in long term studies. This may be of interest to some.


    Thank you for the link. I read about mentalization in one of the books and it seems to be one of successful methods. The more we know the better :)


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    #81
    BPD_Patient
    Registered Users Posts: 5 ✭BPD_Patient


    RachelDDD wrote: »
    I totally agree with you. Ireland is in the dark ages when it comes to successful treatments such as DBT. There is only that one programme in Cork and a few scattered therapists around the country who have little experience. Anyone I contacted was reluctant to take my daughter on as its such a 'new' treatment. It's been around for years all over the world and the UK, have been implementing it in treatment programmes for over 25 years now. Why are we so backward at going forward in this country. No wonder the suicide statistics are so appalling. There are so many people out there crying out for help and there is none available.

    I also think its shocking that your therapist is away on holidays and has left you without a back up person for support. I think you are great for watching those videos on youtube and trying your best to get through this. I know it is so hard to fight those urges but I hope you have a friend or a family member who can try to help you through this patch. If you feel like you are losing control and at risk then I would definitely go to an A&E. I have been in this situation so many times and I know it has always helped my daughter, just a simple chat with a Pysch on call. I have found the Mater Hospital A&E have always been fantastic and so supportive whenever we have a crisis. My daughter has always said they were so understanding & wishes she could have been admitted there long term, rather than sent to an adolescent unit elsewhere. Please feel free to PM me any time. I know I am not a BPD patient but I have a small understanding of what you might be going through. Hang in there and be good to yourself.

    Can't risk going to a&e unfortunately. Despite being an adult I live in fear that they'd contact my next of kin and I'm not ready for that...

    Therapist left word with someone else in the centre that I might call and told me I could see someone else instead, but I don't feel comfortable trying to explain everything to someone new from scratch if that makes sense...


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    #82
    chinacup
    Registered Users Posts: 539 ✭✭✭chinacup


    It could be an idea to name the group something not obvious as to what it is as I think it can still show up on news feed even if its private!


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    #83
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    BPD_Patient wrote: »
    Can't risk going to a&e unfortunately. Despite being an adult I live in fear that they'd contact my next of kin and I'm not ready for that...

    Therapist left word with someone else in the centre that I might call and told me I could see someone else instead, but I don't feel comfortable trying to explain everything to someone new from scratch if that makes sense...

    I am not sure if A&E would contact your next of kin unless it was serious (ie. you had to be admitted against your will). Regarding your clinic, I can understand you not wanting to go through your history with some random person who you probably won't see again. I hated when my daughter was switched to a new doctor on rotation every few months. We had to rely on them to read her file which of course they didn't, and really had only a brief summary on what was going on for her. It is so important for BPD patients to have continuity of care with the same person, someone they trust & can relate to. I hope you are starting to feel a little better by now at least.


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    #84
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    chinacup wrote: »
    It could be an idea to name the group something not obvious as to what it is as I think it can still show up on news feed even if its private!

    Sounds like a good idea :)


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    #85
    Roquentin
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,130 ✭✭✭Roquentin


    what you could do is set up your own blog wherein people can contribute.

    if you dont want to use facebook, im sure there are other things that will enable you do set up a group


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    #86
    margarite
    Registered Users Posts: 430 ✭✭margarite


    I did the DBT course in Celbridge and found it very hard and that was with a group. We had a session with the teachers and found more about then. 1. We do not like going out, 2. It was normal to have certain urges. 3. We all agreed it was very emotive. I found that doing the (I can t remember the name of the exercise but basically I do the following anywhere i.e. the bus/train I imagine that I m in my favorite place and surrounded by my favorite people and we are all having a party big bonfire each time the people change location change etc. Just take 5 minutes or thereabouts it make makes me happy and able to deal with my problems in a sensible way. We were taught this in the class also which helps that we were to close our eyes, ignore any noise or bring ourselves back to the room and after a while I felt relaxed. Hope this helps.


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    #87
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    margarite wrote: »
    I did the DBT course in Celbridge and found it very hard and that was with a group. We had a session with the teachers and found more about then. 1. We do not like going out, 2. It was normal to have certain urges. 3. We all agreed it was very emotive. I found that doing the (I can t remember the name of the exercise but basically I do the following anywhere i.e. the bus/train I imagine that I m in my favorite place and surrounded by my favorite people and we are all having a party big bonfire each time the people change location change etc. Just take 5 minutes or thereabouts it make makes me happy and able to deal with my problems in a sensible way. We were taught this in the class also which helps that we were to close our eyes, ignore any noise or bring ourselves back to the room and after a while I felt relaxed. Hope this helps.

    That sounds like such a great technique and useful for anyone even if not suffering with BPD. I am going to tell my daughter about it later, she may have come across it during her therapy. I didn't know there was a DBT course in Celbridge (probably just for Adults I would imagine). It's good to know that it is available and worth looking into for anyone living in Dublin/Kildare region. It is crazy to think that DBT is the number one treatment for BPD and yet it is a nightmare to find someone who teaches it or even a therapist offering it in the HSE.


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    #88
    guitarzero
    Registered Users Posts: 1,425 ✭✭✭guitarzero


    Hey, just came across this thread. Any luck in finding/creating a support group? Would be great to meet and accompany others with this. :) Even google+ / skype could be really useful.


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    #89
    margarite
    Registered Users Posts: 430 ✭✭margarite


    RachelDDD wrote: »
    Hi,

    I am just wondering if anyone knows of any support groups out there for either BPD patients or their families? I know there was a FB group but I think it is now obsolete. There is a very strong need for a support group and would be keen to try to kick start something if there is enough interest. Would love some (positive!) feedback.

    Thanks.
    If you get any information on support groups please share?


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    #90
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    guitarzero wrote: »
    Hey, just came across this thread. Any luck in finding/creating a support group? Would be great to meet and accompany others with this. :) Even google+ / skype could be really useful.

    So far I haven't come across any in Ireland unfortunately. I would love to try to set one up and delighted to know there are interested people out there. At the moment I have a bit of a crisis going on with my daughter and trying to get her through it. For some reason, this is always a bad time of year for us (change in weather - SAD, pressures of upcoming social events etc.). I promise to get back on track and try to organise something - even a coffee meet up for anyone interested to try to swap ideas about how to get this kick-started. Please follow this post and come along if you have any suggestions or advice you can give :)


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    #91
    RachelDDD
    Registered Users Posts: 119 ✭✭RachelDDD


    margarite wrote: »
    If you get any information on support groups please share?

    Hi Margarite, I definitely will post anything regarding either a meet up or any links of groups I have come across as soon as possible - hopefully sooner rather than later :)


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