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10-07-2019, 20:13   #1
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Sooo bored..

Ok, so I'm definitely an alcoholic and I just have to live with that. My mother and father were also, and I hear I'm more inclined to be like this.

A long story short, I've tried weekend only drinking, which doesn't last and after a heavy weekend, I usually feel sorry for myself during the week and end up drinking about 4 cans a night. The weekends involve spirits, wine or beer in excess.

When I give up the drink, I don't find a physical addiction is there but I just feel so bored without it, like I can't relax my mind and just be happy with doing nothing anymore. Anything that I try and do to occupy myself just feels forced. I end up thinking about a drink then and the mood swings.

Does anyone have any recommendations, I'm at my wit's end and hate feeling like this.

I haven't gone more than 5 days without a drink in years, maybe I'm just not giving it the time for my mind to adjust?
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10-07-2019, 20:18   #2
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You need to find a hobby that is as dangerous as the drinking was

Mountain climbing motorbikes etc
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11-07-2019, 13:33   #3
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I think you have the cart before the horse.

You think by quitting drink, your mind will "adjust" and you'll have a better life without drink. Fewer mood swings, fewer cravings, maybe even a bit more drive and energy.

But why are you bored in the first place? Maybe there's an underlying uneasiness in your life. When you say you're "bored", you're basically saying you're "not content".. and that's a bad way to be. Because when you have a fulfilling job or a goal that you're progressing towards, and you have good relationships with family and friends, and you're not living in poverty or ill-health, all that's left at the end of the day should be a feeling of contentment, without your mind telling you that you're bored and need a drink.

So maybe figure out what's missing in your life, and instead of just trying to fill the hole left by alcohol with something equally boring like trying to read or go for walks just for the sake of it, see if there's a bigger goal you can work towards. If achievement of the goal involves ditching alcohol (e.g. so you can save some money, or because alcohol would be detrimental to you achieving the goal) even better.
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12-07-2019, 15:57   #4
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The biggest goal in your life, at present, is recovery from alcoholism. If you read previous posts on Non Drinkers Group forum you will find various ways that people achieved sobriety.
To start I suggest you visit your GP.
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12-07-2019, 16:20   #5
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When your an alcoholic your brain finds ways to justify drinking ,boredom is obviously the main one being used by you at the moment .
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15-07-2019, 10:58   #6
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Here ya go.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQPz4YVSkyQ

Referring to the part of the vid where he says find something better than alcohol. (rather than the drug he's recommending-But for some people a visit to your GP is a good idea)

Last edited by antix80; 15-07-2019 at 11:13.
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15-07-2019, 11:08   #7
Turquoise Hexagon Sun
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@antix80: Yeah, and restructuring your life. Most people that want to quit alcohol want to keep their same life and even pub social life. That's understandable but there's a huge community of people that love doing so many more things that doesn't involve getting ****-face. Hillwalking, swimming, cafe/cinema groups. Just look on Meetup. JP makes a good point that if you are drinker, your friends are drinkers and the places you go to socialise are pubs and it's built-in. Time to think about envisioning your life without drink and finding and seeing the value in that. It's OK to know that you don't want to drink but finding the value in not drinking is another story.


In my experience, it takes a couple of months for your brain to rewire and get the highs from "normal" every day things. For example. Going to the cinema on a Friday night just seemed boring to me, even though I love films. But then there's the other high you get from that. Such as knowing that I didn't destroy my health, my bank balance and all the benefits of not drinking. And, I enjoyed a film, got out of the house etc.

There are may things that you can get satisfaction from and will make you feel physically good and mentally good. Exercise is one. Eating healthy is another. Sense of achievement. Did you achievement anything lately? Do you have some short term and long term goals? Are you achieving progress with them?

The reason you began to drink could be a deeper routed issue. Because it's an escapism from reality and dealing with your normal emotions.

Have you looked at this? Do a audit of our life? Are you fulfilling all these things in the boxes.

Spoiler:

[IMG]https://get-help.stopitnow.org.uk/images/self-help/building-a-good-life/a-good-life.jpg[/IMG]

Last edited by Turquoise Hexagon Sun; 15-07-2019 at 11:18.
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