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Eddie Rockets

  • 03-01-2004 12:34am
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 801 ✭✭✭


    It was New Years Eve. Christmas, an excuse for endless nights out, incessant parties and countless ill-considered matches was over, and tonight would officially mark the end of a months brash spending. In the next few days, all of Dublin would return to their offices. Fraught glances across the floor would be made furtively and avoided surreptitiously. References to Decembers indiscreet frolics would be made only late on a Friday after too many drinks, and then only by colleagues probing for salacious detail. After a few weeks, all would be conveniently forgotten, at least until next Christmas presented the opportunity for more of the same.

    What had started as a mild balmy December had lately discovered the bitter sharp winds and steely chilled rain that we had hoped might hold over until January, when we expected to be cold, wet and miserable. I fantasised about the possibility of staying in the convivial warmth of the house for an evening alone with some trash TV movie to ring in the New Year. Of course the phone calls would come – “We’re meeting here or there… See you at eight… But you can’t stay in on New Years night”- an effort could be made to decline the well-intended invites, but perhaps better accept the unavoidable and accede graciously than to parry what was, in any case, an inevitable outcome.

    The only thing certain was that too much would be drunk. This was made palatable by the fact that it would be the last night out for quite a while. When the drinking would start and where it would end were the only uncertainties. Well… you couldn’t really plan for what might happen in between either. In preparation for the forthcoming onslaught, I thought a trip to the local Eddie Rockets fast food parlour might be prudent.

    Though it was only five in the afternoon, it was pitch dark outside. Distorted orange neon reflected from street puddles that were being pelted with cold dirty rain. I buried my head in my chest to shelter from the vicious churning squall as I made my way up the hill toward Phibsboro. Overweight, flustered housewives returning from the city centre sales accounted for the tailbacks at the traffic lights. As I crossed the road to the welcoming lights of Eddie Rockets, one female driver, her chubby fingers gripping the steering wheel so tight that her knuckles were white, snarled at me. Happy New Year to you too lady.

    There was a queue to get seats at Eddie Rockets - a new phenomenon to me. Having walked this far in these conditions though, I wasn’t turning back without being fed. I hadn’t brought a book or a newspaper to amuse me so I stood and waited.

    A minibus pulled up outside the door. A guy and a girl in their mid-twenties came in and looked the place over. Seemingly satisfied with what they saw, they left again and returned escorting a party of handicapped young people with them. They found a suite of seats at the counter and sat down to order. Unworthy though it was, I wondered why I hadn’t seen those empty seats first.

    A few minutes later, another seat at the bar became available and I sat down. To my right was a young couple. She was extremely pretty with a broad smile that showed a mouthful of big braces. The perfect white jacket she wore had an immense furry collar to shelter her from the inclement bluster. He was a little older. As they whispered and giggled together, the physical communication between them was fascinating – each of them was utterly spellbound by the other. To see such a young couple so completely at ease was somehow heartening to the embittered old cynic sitting beside them.

    Behind the counter, the work was frantic. I ordered from a girl with beautiful sallow eastern European skin. She had a wonderful smile and was wearing one of those awful red Santa Claus hats that tend to turn up at Christmastime. Of ten people working in the service area, only one of them looked Irish. He roared at another girl. “Rox,” he spluttered jovially, “what in the name of JAYSUS is this supposed to say?” Any doubts about his nationality were quickly laid to rest. He chuckled at her as he pointed at a chit. She smiled endearingly at him and provided whatever clarification he required.

    To my left was another couple, slightly younger than those to my right. They shared a plate of Nachos. His hand was on her knee, and in turn her leg was draped over his leg. They whispered to each other, though the volume of the music dispensed with the need for such care over eavesdroppers. This manifestation of youthful bliss seemed somehow an appropriate backdrop against which to bring in the New Year and the aspirations that consideration of a new year brings.

    My dinner now arrived, I tucked in. The furry white collar and her boyfriend got up to leave. “Bye now. Happy New Year” she said as she gave me a carefree wave and a big beautiful smile. They walked off to queue behind an improbably young pregnant girl at the checkout to settle their bill.

    An older couple, perhaps in their forties, replaced them beside me. He sat down and read his paper whilst she studiously ignored him. They ordered without consulting each other. “Can you not put the bloody paper away for five minutes,” she snapped after the waitress had left.

    He pushed the paper aside with an air of resignation. I looked at the page he had left open. There was a colour picture of New York shoppers wading through the department store sales. To the forefront of the picture was a heavily armed soldier, goggles on and a very big gun at the ready. In the back of the picture you could see other heavily armed soldiers. The juxtaposition of the civilians and the soldiers made me feel sad in a way I cannot quite explain. The occasion of a new year should be about hope, not hate. The soldiers somehow threw everything into an acrid relief.

    I finished up my coffee and settled the bill. The only thing certain was that it would be a new year full of uncertainty. In the meantime, there were a few celebratory drinks to be had.


«1

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,437 ✭✭✭bugler


    I hate that f*cking place too.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 710 ✭✭✭BattlingCheese


    Extremely well written.
    A pleasure to read.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,872 ✭✭✭segadreamcast


    It's well-worded... yet, it feels somewhat pretentious - and one wonders does it actually have meaning, and, in addition, should it not be in the English/Creative Writing forum...?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,471 ✭✭✭elexes


    many a good post from this young chap


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 811 ✭✭✭Ronaldo7


    Interesting read.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,503 ✭✭✭Makaveli


    Great work again dod.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,984 ✭✭✭✭Lump


    NIcely written piece... its anazing the things you notice, when your not distracted, wheater it be reading something or that fact that you are under pressure. I walked around Kilkenny city on Christmas eve, just had a couple of small things to get, no pressure, it was great to stand back and just take in what was happening around me. Well done sir.


    John


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 479 ✭✭phoenix2181


    It can't rain all of the time......


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,313 ✭✭✭bus77


    Leave those people alone and stop watching them


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,946 ✭✭✭red_ice


    nice read.

    but you have to admit, that sauce they use on like... EVERYTHING is a just fantastic!

    :)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,267 ✭✭✭Exit


    Good stuff!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,838 ✭✭✭DapperGent


    Originally posted by dod
    I ordered from a girl with beautiful sallow eastern European skin. She had a wonderful smile and was wearing one of those awful red Santa Claus hats that tend to turn up at Christmastime.
    I know the one you mean. That chick is pretty fucking hot.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭Puck


    Are the cheese burgers still called "Cheese Please"? That always kind of bothered me. I never really figured out how to ask for one. Should I say "Can I have a 'Cheese Please'?", which might end up with me getting a cheese of sorts. Highly unlikely I know, but it still bothered me. Plus I have to say please when asking for something, I can't help it. If I wanted to say please in that case though I'd have to say "Can I have a 'Cheese Please' please?" That just sounds stupid, as does "Can I please have a 'Cheese Please' ?".

    Yummy though.

    Nice post, I must look grumpier than you though because whenever I'm at the counter on my own none of the other customers have ever spoken to me.
    <shrug>


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,267 ✭✭✭Exit


    I'd say if you asked for a cheeseburger you'd probably get what you wanted.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 28,128 ✭✭✭✭Mossy Monk


    as always a great read :)

    images galore in my head as i read it


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,503 ✭✭✭Makaveli


    Originally posted by Puck
    Are the cheese burgers still called "Cheese Please"? That always kind of bothered me. I never really figured out how to ask for one. Should I say "Can I have a 'Cheese Please'?", which might end up with me getting a cheese of sorts. Highly unlikely I know, but it still bothered me. Plus I have to say please when asking for something, I can't help it. If I wanted to say please in that case though I'd have to say "Can I have a 'Cheese Please' please?" That just sounds stupid, as does "Can I please have a 'Cheese Please' ?".

    Yummy though.

    Nice post, I must look grumpier than you though because whenever I'm at the counter on my own none of the other customers have ever spoken to me.
    <shrug>


    You could ask for a cheese please and a large coke please.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 158 ✭✭Libertine


    It was the 2nd of December. As I browsed boards.ie, casting my disdainful eye upon the pathetic collection of threads littering the After Hours forum, I happened upon a pretentious essay clearly written by someone with too much time on their hands.

    A fast-food joint was allegedly the subject matter; however it soon became clear that this disjointed collection of adjectives and adverbs was a cry for help from someone all too obviously upset by their performance at the recent Special Olympics. As I enticed my pitch-black mousewheel to reveal more of this epic tale, an alarming desire for self-harm came upon me... like a wheelchair hurtling down a hill to meet it's impending doom. These suicidal tendencies weren't helped in the slightest by the moronic comments which followed. Just as I reached for the relief of the red box shimmering in the top-right hand corner of my screen, it occured to me that writing this reply would offer a more satisfying respite than throwing myself from the roof of my abode.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,437 ✭✭✭weemcd


    ^ nicley worded :D:D:D

    i however wil be more blunt, what was, or was there a point to that well worded nonsence???:confused::confused::(

    he he smileys are easier than words


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,486 ✭✭✭Redshift


    That was one of the most enjoyable posts I have read on boards in a while. A perfectly ordinary scenario but you captured it well, an absolute pleasure to read.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 707 ✭✭✭d4r3n


    Redshift

    homo.jpg


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,838 ✭✭✭DapperGent


    Eh, why the fuck are all you losers slagging off someone who's made a bit of an effort?

    Libertine - obnoxious sarcasm as a first post? The future bodes well.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 158 ✭✭Libertine


    Originally posted by DapperGent
    Eh, why the fuck are all you losers slagging off someone who's made a bit of an effort?

    As replies to this travesty against the English language came fleeting in as if by magic, one in particular caught my eye. An individual known to the online community as "DapperGent" referred to me as a loser, and it became apparent to me that anybody who is willing to moderate the weather forum while labelling others as losers must be a special olympian of some sort.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,738 ✭✭✭Barry Aldwell


    Originally posted by Libertine
    ...it became apparent to me that anybody who is willing to moderate the weather forum while labelling others as losers must be a special olympian of some sort.
    I feel I should, nay must, quote Bender from Futurama on this:

    "Save it for the cross burning, Adolf"

    :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,987 ✭✭✭✭zAbbo


    I see the special olympians are getting good coverage here, as for the original post, reads like something Adrian Mole may have attempted. Now all you need to do is remove the vowels.

    If it was supposed to arouse some sort of emotion, well it has(not in me tho). My own opinion being that if it was offered for some sort of evaluation of your creative writing, I`d say its a very nice Junior Cert level piece.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,838 ✭✭✭DapperGent


    Originally posted by Libertine
    a cry for help from someone all too obviously upset by their performance at the recent Special Olympics.
    Originally posted by Libertine
    anybody who is willing to moderate the weather forum while labelling others as losers must be a special olympian of some sort.
    You know dude it wasn't even funny the first time.

    Congratulations, you are in the reciept of almost instanteous cunthood.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,984 ✭✭✭✭Lump


    BazH, are you an english teacher, got a masters in english?

    Well if you don't be quiet.


    John


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,213 ✭✭✭✭therecklessone


    Originally posted by Libertine
    It was the 2nd of December.

    Might want to buy a new callendar, he posted in January


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 811 ✭✭✭Ronaldo7


    Give the guy a break for ****s sake.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,111 ✭✭✭tba


    Originally posted by Libertine
    a cry for help from someone all too obviously upset by their performance at the recent Special Olympics.
    Originally posted by Libertine
    anybody who is willing to moderate the weather forum while labelling others as losers must be a special olympian of some sort.

    LETS SACRIFICE HIM TO OUR GODS!


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,089 ✭✭✭D!ve^Bomb!


    wots the **** was the point in that


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 47 Gir


    pml tbh.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 590 ✭✭✭herbie747


    Pretencious ****.

    I completely agree with "Libertine". Good stuff.
    it became apparent to me that anybody who is willing to moderate the weather forum while labelling others as losers must be a special olympian of some sort.
    :D:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,726 ✭✭✭quank


    it was nice to read.. but..... i thought there was going to have a cool ending :)
    like you kick everyone's asses and fly out the window with a pair of whitey tightys on the outside of your trousers of some kind....

    *sniff*
    i never get what i want.....

    :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,354 ✭✭✭Frank Grimes


    Originally posted by Libertine
    As replies to this travesty against the English language came fleeting in as if by magic, one in particular caught my eye. An individual known to the online community as "DapperGent" referred to me as a loser, and it became apparent to me that anybody who is willing to moderate the weather forum while labelling others as losers must be a special olympian of some sort.
    indenial.jpg


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,483 ✭✭✭Töpher


    I liked the original piece, despite its seeming lack of a point, I enjoyed reading it.

    And good call Grimey! :D


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  • Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 21,504 Mod ✭✭✭✭Agent Smith


    Originally posted by phoenix2181
    It can't rain all of the time......
    give the goverment time my friend, give them time


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 590 ✭✭✭herbie747


    Grimey,
    The fact that you pulled out one of those sad forum gamer-type cards just makes you look like a complete nerd yourself.

    And, as per usual, the standard response follows:
    "good call:D" - equally as sad.

    It wasn't a "good call" - it was unoriginal and sad. Every nerd on these boards have a directory of these cards tucked away thinking they are hilarious; just dying for an opportunity to use them.....:rolleyes:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,437 ✭✭✭bugler


    Herbie, I really don't fancy your chances of keeping that username much longer.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 590 ✭✭✭herbie747


    Originally posted by bugler
    Herbie, I really don't fancy your chances of keeping that username much longer.

    Why? Because I pointed out what everyone else was thinking?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,354 ✭✭✭Frank Grimes


    Originally posted by herbie747
    Grimey,
    The fact that you pulled out one of those sad forum gamer-type cards just makes you look like a complete nerd yourself.
    indenial.jpg


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,437 ✭✭✭bugler


    Originally posted by herbie747
    Why? Because I pointed out what everyone else was thinking?

    No, because you seem completely self-righteous and convinced that if anyone thinks differently from you then it's because THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF COMPUTER NERDS WHO HAVE NO LIVES AND ARE LOSERS AND SPEND ALL THEIR TIME ON MESSAGE BOARDS PROVING THAT THEY'RE ALL LOSERS WITH NO LIVES :D:D

    This isn't just based on this thread, your reaction when people rebuked you for using the term 'fags' showed that again, everyone else but you has no sense of humour, are too uptight, or whatever else the reasons are for you appearing annoying and obnoxious to the average poster. This is probably due to the fact that ALL THE BOARDS POSTERS (WELL THE ONES WHO DON'T AGREE WITH ME ANYWAY LOL) ARE LOSERS WHO SIT AT THEIR COMPUTERS ALL DAY AND DON'T LIKE IT WHEN I TALK THE TRUTH..LIKE WHAT EVERYONE IS THINKING HERE :D:D

    Are you suggesting that people on an internet forum are afraid to say what they think, because the atmosphere is so intimidating? Please continue telling us what everyone else thinks, it's much more convenient than people actually having to express it themselves. You can do it for everyone. Even if they ARE COMPLETE LOSERS :D:D

    Libertine should have posted under his/her real name, it wasn't more offensive than an awful lot of what is posted here, perhaps Special Olympics references aside. And I'm curious as to who it is...well they have some wit..so that rules certain posters out..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17 $ynergy


    ˆ6.00 for a cheese burger, what a rip off!
    Only went there once, never again!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 590 ✭✭✭herbie747


    Originally posted by bugler
    No, because you seem completely self-righteous and convinced that if anyone thinks differently from you then it's because THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF COMPUTER NERDS WHO HAVE NO LIVES AND ARE LOSERS AND SPEND ALL THEIR TIME ON MESSAGE BOARDS PROVING THAT THEY'RE ALL LOSERS WITH NO LIVES :D:D

    This isn't just based on this thread, your reaction when people rebuked you for using the term 'fags' showed that again, everyone else but you has no sense of humour, are too uptight, or whatever else the reasons are for you appearing annoying and obnoxious to the average poster. This is probably due to the fact that ALL THE BOARDS POSTERS (WELL THE ONES WHO DON'T AGREE WITH ME ANYWAY LOL) ARE LOSERS WHO SIT AT THEIR COMPUTERS ALL DAY AND DON'T LIKE IT WHEN I TALK THE TRUTH..LIKE WHAT EVERYONE IS THINKING HERE :D:D

    Are you suggesting that people on an internet forum are afraid to say what they think, because the atmosphere is so intimidating? Please continue telling us what everyone else thinks, it's much more convenient than people actually having to express it themselves. You can do it for everyone. Even if they ARE COMPLETE LOSERS :D:D

    Libertine should have posted under his/her real name, it wasn't more offensive than an awful lot of what is posted here, perhaps Special Olympics references aside. And I'm curious as to who it is...well they have some wit..so that rules certain posters out..

    Gees, don't cry.
    I didn't say everyone is a loser or a nerd. I never said that people on these forums are nerds or losers either. I said that the sad twats who use those gamer cards are losers & nerds (aka: gamers).
    Never said they spend ALL THEIR TIME ON MESSAGE BOARDS either. Where are you getting this false info?
    I only slagged the nerd who used the card. Anyone else I slag on a different board is for a specific reason - I don't slag EVERYONE WHO DOESN'T AGREE WITH ME, like you seem to think.

    I can't believe he actually thought it was funny to use it again!:rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,726 ✭✭✭quank


    LIES LIES ITS ALL LIES!
    :(
    WHY DO YOU HAVE TO LIE!!?!?!?!??!?!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,307 ✭✭✭richindub2


    those gathering cards are horrible horrible overused crap, everytime i see one i want to hurt whoever posted it

    also, original poster; tl;dr


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,437 ✭✭✭weemcd


    herbie747 i think you are spot on with your opinions on those game cards
    :D:D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,354 ✭✭✭Frank Grimes


    Originally posted by herbie747
    I can't believe he actually thought it was funny to use it again!:rolleyes:
    Maybe if you try to insult people better than just calling them losers/nerds/fags/whatever I'll bother coming up with something original.
    I guess irony along with sarcasm is wasted on you.

    Oh, richindub2, I'll try not posting anymore cards. Don't want to get myself injured. I'm just a nerd gamer after all.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 590 ✭✭✭herbie747


    Originally posted by Frank Grimes
    Maybe if you try to insult people better than just calling them losers/nerds/fags/whatever I'll bother coming up with something original.
    I guess irony along with sarcasm is wasted on you.

    Where's the sarcasm and irony I supposedly missed? The card was just crap! There was nothing sarcastic or ironic about it. Don't try to pretend you were being sarcastic, now that other people think your cards are gay.

    And don't try to make light of it by saying "if you try to insult people better than just calling them losers/nerds/fags/whatever I'll bother coming up with something original". You (and the retarded poster after you) thought that card was hilarious (you even thought you got me good again by using it twice:rolleyes:), and I honestly believe that WAS you trying to come up with something original.
    Those stupid cards are only funny to genuine gaming nerds: it just doesn't cut it outside of Gamocon, or Lancon, or Gaelcon, or whatever the hell it's called.

    And just because you whip out a sappy card that says I'M a geek, because I called YOU a geek, doesn't make it true just because it says it on the card.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,987 ✭✭✭✭zAbbo


    I dont get it, see the cards are part of boards.ie http://www.boards.ie/gathering/index.html

    Why are you slagging off a fellow boards lad about them?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,354 ✭✭✭Frank Grimes


    Originally posted by bazH
    Why are you slagging off a fellow boards lad about them?
    Perhaps they're touching a nerve?


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