Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

languagenerd · 30-09-2015 12:56AM

starling wrote: »

Really wondering what they wanted and what it was used for, cause that's weird...

Genuinely can't remember the word, I had never heard it before or since (I originally thought it was a brand name I'd never heard). It was apparently some sort of music equipment, last seen in the 14th century :pac:

pauldla · 30-09-2015 06:15AM

Back in my IT support days. Ah, the happy memories.

So, senior manager logs a VERY irate call about his information screen disappearing. I am dispatched.

Arrive to his office and he's really pissed off. Tells me how important his work is, how much this delay has cost the bank, and tells me that I better fix his computer etc etc.

So, thus chastised (for doing nothing more that turning up promptly to do my job, I might add), I took a look at his PC. Can you guess what the problem was, dear reader?

Yes, that's right. He had minimized the window.

And the best part was, when I explained what had happened to him, he asked (still in his Angry Manager Voice) 'And when will it happen again...?'

I have since moved on to another field.

Gone Drinking · 30-09-2015 07:31AM

starling wrote: »

Aw, that sounds like the ending of some kind of adorable and uplifting film in which the salt of the earth farmer is swamped with debt and things are looking grim, but he (and possibly his pet pig) have done something exciting and inspiring, and there's been financial reward, and now that he's saved the farm and paid off his debts, the farmer has decided he's finally going to make good on his promise to himself (mentioned earlier in the film, obvs) that he will go in to the best restaurant in town and get "the best" for himself, for once in his life. Perhaps his dying wife even told him on her deathbed that she had watched him putting others first his whole life and now she wanted him to promise her that he would go to the restaurant and get "the best" for himself...... Except you and the waitress were only in the final scene, so you have no idea about any of it.

Or more likely the story of an uneducated farmers struggle with illiteracy and his dream of being able to read the menu to order what he actually wants for once.

Wossack · 30-09-2015 09:35AM

starling wrote: »

Aw, that sounds like the ending of some kind of adorable and uplifting film in which the salt of the earth farmer is swamped with debt and things are looking grim, but he (and possibly his pet pig) have done something exciting and inspiring, and there's been financial reward, and now that he's saved the farm and paid off his debts, the farmer has decided he's finally going to make good on his promise to himself (mentioned earlier in the film, obvs) that he will go in to the best restaurant in town and get "the best" for himself, for once in his life. Perhaps his dying wife even told him on her deathbed that she had watched him putting others first his whole life and now she wanted him to promise her that he would go to the restaurant and get "the best" for himself...... Except you and the waitress were only in the final scene, so you have no idea about any of it.

that would explain the accompanying camera crew...

LynnGrace · 30-09-2015 09:41AM

pauldla wrote: »

Back in my IT support days. Ah, the happy memories.

So, senior manager logs a VERY irate call about his information screen disappearing. I am dispatched.

Arrive to his office and he's really pissed off. Tells me how important his work is, how much this delay has cost the bank, and tells me that I better fix his computer etc etc.

So, thus chastised (for doing nothing more that turning up promptly to do my job, I might add), I took a look at his PC. Can you guess what the problem was, dear reader?

Yes, that's right. He had minimized the window.

And the best part was, when I explained what had happened to him, he asked (still in his Angry Manager Voice) 'And when will it happen again...?'

I have since moved on to another field.

I love it.

J Mysterio · 30-09-2015 01:51PM

starling wrote: »

Really wondering what they wanted and what it was used for, cause that's weird...

You would love it Clarice.

draiochtanois · 30-09-2015 04:11PM

This post has been deleted.

Cool_CM · 30-09-2015 05:08PM

alcea wrote: »

Maybe his post could be going through the wrong sorting office and have to be re-routed through a different sorting office. This would mean that by the time he gets what you sent him, there maybe a sticker on the envelope requesting him to put West Cork on his address. Eircode cannot work if people and courier companies don't use it.

Being from Cork and regularly dealing with people who live in West Cork (mostly people who have relocated there), I'd be almost certain that it had nothing to do with postage and Eircodes and a little more to do with this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FAI_-woNh4

Roselm · 30-09-2015 05:12PM

suicide_circus wrote: »

I was in a little restaurant in bessington and in comes a farmer in wellies and a flat cap and sits down, refuses the waitresses offer of a menu and just said "The best you have". He answered all the waitresses probing questions trying to figure out what he might like with " the best you have". It was quite sweet actually.

I wonder if he couldn't read so didn't want the menu

KT10 · 01-10-2015 12:06PM

I was sent on-site to a client who, despite not having a support contract with us, rang us anyway any time something went wrong cause he's mates with my boss.

Arrive to find a failed server (only server in the building) failing to boot. I'd been on-site with these guys previously 9 months ago and without even logging into the box, had strongly advised they get a new server, based purely on the fact it looked old as hell and was running MS Server 2003.

So it had completely sh!t itself and despite a few hours work, I had to walk into the bossmans office and deliver the bad news in the most non-techie friendly manner possible.

"Tis f#cked mate." were my exact words

Well he went on a rant about IT and this and that and f'ing technology and blah blah blah.

I stood there, nodded along, and when he asked me the question I was waiting for, I had an answer ready to go.

"But WHY has it failed? What's wrong with it?"

"Well, I'd hazard a guess that its due to the fact the box is 10 years old, has been running 24/7 that whole time, in a small room under your stairs with no air con. Quite frankly mate, you're lucky it didn't go on fire at some point..." :pac:

He tried the old, 'you should have warned us' and I stopped him there, forwarding on my email I sent to him 9 months ago strongly advising they buy a new server and migrate away from their current set up, ideally installing in a new location in the building.

A lesson I learnt years ago in the IT game, always have a record of your recommendations.

Wossack · 01-10-2015 01:34PM

'can you send me that request in an email' has saved my ass countless times alright..

Conall Cernach · 01-10-2015 02:40PM

I just got asked "Do you mind knocking off an hour early today? You still get paid."

byronbay2 · 01-10-2015 03:00PM

pauldla wrote: »

Back in my IT support days. Ah, the happy memories.

So, senior manager logs a VERY irate call about his information screen disappearing. I am dispatched.

Arrive to his office and he's really pissed off. Tells me how important his work is, how much this delay has cost the bank, and tells me that I better fix his computer etc etc.

So, thus chastised (for doing nothing more that turning up promptly to do my job, I might add), I took a look at his PC. Can you guess what the problem was, dear reader?

Yes, that's right. He had minimized the window.

And the best part was, when I explained what had happened to him, he asked (still in his Angry Manager Voice) 'And when will it happen again...?'

I have since moved on to another field.

So, what do we know here? It was a VERY senior (male) person, who does EXTREMELY important work. He was working in Finance and had a strong antipathy towards tech/IT people. I think I've solved the puzzle - I know who you're referring to. Were you working in Frankfurt at the time? Would the initials AvB mean anything to you?

somesoldiers · 01-10-2015 03:10PM

byronbay2 wrote: »

So, what do we know here? It was a VERY senior (male) person, who does EXTREMELY important work. He was working in Finance and had a strong antipathy towards tech/IT people. I think I've solved the puzzle - I know who you're referring to. Were you working in Frankfurt at the time? Would the initials AvB mean anything to you?

High or low finance? It's like Play Your Cards Right

SillyBeans · 01-10-2015 03:19PM

I think what we've all learned from this thread is that everyone in a position that involves computer use has to do at least a basic skills course. Either that or make strangling people for sheer stupidity legal!

KH25 · 03-10-2015 10:46AM

I used to work in a gym and we had some absolutely bizzarre customers. I really questioned how many of these people had managed to get this far in life. One day a woman came up to me with a paper cup full of hot water and explained that she had tried to buy a hot chocolate from the vending machine and it was obviously empty.

'No worries' I said and stuck an out of order sign on the machine. She then asked me for her €1 back. Now, my job didn't deal with refunds from the vending machine. The policy was that the company, when fixing the machine, would have to take the money from the machine and give it to us. My job also worked with a hilariously low cash float of about €20 in change, which would be quickly eaten up every weekend by people paying for their children to go for a swim or buying things like locks or swimming hats.

I told the woman this and she got in a huff with me about how awkward I was being. I told her that her €1 would be waiting for her the next week. About an hour later she comes up to me and just puts ANOTHER paper cup of hot water on the reception desk and says 'I am now owed €2'. Despite the fact that I had put an out of order sign up, she seemed to think she could still use the machine with a different outcome :rolleyes:

So the next week rolls around and sure enough her €2 is there waiting for her. She never shows up. While I was locking up there were 3 kids still in the reception area and I asked whether someone was picking them up and they said their mother would be there in twenty minutes. Grand so, I continued locking up and left the kids sitting there until I had to close up the whole building (about 20 minutes later). Just as I was locking the gate to enter the complex, the mother pulls up and immediately shouts at me that shouts at me that she wants her €2. I told her that the whole building was locked up and that she would have to wait another week. She then started to berate the kids saying that they should have taken the money off me :eek:

J Mysterio · 05-10-2015 03:47PM

Probably spent €2 in petrol to get there.

Ken. · 05-10-2015 03:51PM

J Mysterio wrote: »

Probably spent €2 in petrol to get there.

My brother was a manager of a toy shop in London. One day a woman was charged £x.99 instead of £x.95 She drove back 15 miles through London traffic to give out and get her 4p.

Mr.Carter · 05-10-2015 03:57PM

Sent on-site to Dunnes stores on a weekend call out.
Arrive to find a very upset manager who said the lift is breaking down everyday, turns out that the big "RED" stop button is pressed in, and there is a big "RED" light beside the button indicting so, you only have to twist it to return it to use.

Rude is par for the course in Dunnes

Captain Flaps · 06-10-2015 10:52AM

Have millions of stories from back when I worked in a pharmacy photo lab, too many to even list tbh. Some that stand out:

- People not understanding why an extremely close up portrait couldn't be scanned and printed landscape without either having blank space each side or seriously cropping the image

- A woman coming in with a group photo where one person is facing the wrong way (as you can literally only see the back of their head) and asking me to Photoshop them to face the camera...no source image provided or anything, she just thought I could 'spin' the person in the pic!

- A guy asking if I could do a bulk discount if he bought 10 SD cards at once. Not a stupid request in itself, until I discovered he didn't know they were reusable and was binning them once full

- Someone who thought it would help get their film developed quicker if they removed all the rolls of film from the canisters before handing them in. They didn't understand why you can't do this and accused me of trying to scam them when I tried to explain why they'd ruined the film and lost their pics forever.

I'll post more good ones if I remember them!

Edit: Oh, actually a common one was muslim men getting very annoyed that their wives couldn't get a passport photo taken with the face fully covered. We even had a system set up for having a female member of staff take it out of view of the rest of the shop but for some this was still unacceptable to some of them. More than once I agreed to take the photo to their specifications with the understanding that I had advised them it would be rejected and that I would be allowed write that on their receipt so they couldn't come back and try and get a refund when the passport office sent them back. Most of them tried regardless.

recylingbin · 06-10-2015 11:18AM

suicide_circus wrote: »

I was in a little restaurant in bessington and in comes a farmer in wellies and a flat cap and sits down, refuses the waitresses offer of a menu and just said "The best you have". He answered all the waitresses probing questions trying to figure out what he might like with " the best you have". It was quite sweet actually.

Mart day.

somesoldiers · 06-10-2015 11:32AM

I was once asked "Do you have a la carte or is it just what's on the menu?" when working in a bar/ restaurant

jca · 06-10-2015 12:21PM

somesoldiers wrote: »

I was once asked "Do you have a la carte or is it just what's on the menu?" when working in a bar/ restaurant

Yep!!! That's the winner....ðŸ˜Š

New Home · 06-10-2015 12:22PM

Could have been 'table d'hôte' menu.

duffman3833 · 06-10-2015 12:26PM

(Me)Can you press the start button and go to all programs.....
(user)where's the start button
(Me)..... really

Captain Flaps · 06-10-2015 12:33PM

duffman3833 wrote: »

(Me)Can you press the start button and go to all programs.....
(user)where's the start button
(Me)..... really

It hasn't actually been the 'Start' button since XP. I completely understand somebody not understanding what you meant.

duffman3833 · 06-10-2015 12:36PM

Captain Flaps wrote: »

It hasn't actually been the 'Start' button since XP. I completely understand somebody not understanding what you meant.

The user had a XP machine before and there an everyday user of the machine, maybe it was just tiredness or something and they just weren't thinking at that moment in time ha

razorblunt · 06-10-2015 12:48PM

I worked as first line support for a while and we'd have to be in the office quite early some mornings.
Phone rings and I answer it and someone is frantic on the other end:

"I've got a real important presentation at 9 and I can't find the printer"
-"This isn't the IT helpdesk, you'll have to ring ..."
"No, no they're too slow to sort things and I heard you guys are faster"
<Quick internal search on his name and I saw he was quite senior, so felt I better try and do something>
-"ok, go to Control Panel etc etc"
"No, no, I can print from Powerpoint, I just don't know where the printer is on this floor (he was in a different country to me)"
<pause>
<long pause>
<longer pause>
-"What?"
"I can hear it printing but I can't see where it is"

Basically had to end the call there, told my manager in case any flack came back on us. He rang the caller, turns out it wasn't the Senior Manager at all but someone junior who thought it would get priority if it came from that phone.

Sheep Lover · 06-10-2015 01:06PM

This thread is basically a "Nerds making fun of non Nerds" thread.

melissak · 06-10-2015 01:18PM

"Stop spending all day on the internet and do some work". Some people....

Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

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