Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

Mother Brain · 28-09-2015 09:16PM

Frynge wrote: »

Today in work I accidentally changed a database file and when I went to restore from a backup, I then accidentally synced our server to all other global servers and basically shut down Facebook.

Instead of telling someone what I did, I'm hiding in the toilet here... Well just until I can post it on Facebook again.

Anything you can do to keep it down?

XxMCRxBabyxX · 28-09-2015 09:19PM

Mother Brain wrote: »

Anything you can do to keep it down?

But what would happen to the Dumb/Great Facebook Statuses thread if he did?!

tadcan · 29-09-2015 01:06AM

Working in a chipper that delivered. One guy would call in asking if we had unusual items on the menu, which could go on for a few minutes. One evening he asked if we had escargot, you know snails, trying to sound fancy. I was in no mood to have this conversation again, replied "no, we're a chipper" and hung up. About ten minutes later he called back up and ordered something we could make.

Dave_The_Sheep · 29-09-2015 01:17AM

Customer: Bought these shoes, they're dodgy, I wan' a refund.
Me: Alright, let me take a look...
...
Me: You've worn these. And you've put them in the washing machine to clean them. The outside is peeling off.
Customer: No way, didn't wear dem. The leader started peelin' away after a day or two.
Me: I'm sorry, but I can't re-sell these, they're obviously after been through the washing machine.
Customer: No way... I want my money back, I know me rights!
Me: They've been washed.
Customer: Dey haven't!
Me: Look, I might be able to get you a credit note ... just admit that they're through the washer and I'll exchange them for you.
Customer: ... alright. I washed them.
Me: Sorry, I can't take them back, you put them through the washing machine. See you now.

Tosser.

The King of Moo · 29-09-2015 02:18AM

Dave_The_Sheep wrote: »

Customer: Bought these shoes, they're dodgy, I wan' a refund.
Me: Alright, let me take a look...
...
Me: You've worn these. And you've put them in the washing machine to clean them. The outside is peeling off.
Customer: No way, didn't wear dem. The leader started peelin' away after a day or two.
Me: I'm sorry, but I can't re-sell these, they're obviously after been through the washing machine.
Customer: No way... I want my money back, I know me rights!
Me: They've been washed.
Customer: Dey haven't!
Me: Look, I might be able to get you a credit note ... just admit that they're through the washer and I'll exchange them for you.
Customer: ... alright. I washed them.
Me: Sorry, I can't take them back, you put them through the washing machine. See you now.

Tosser.

While the customer was undoubtedly an ass, it's pretty poor form to lie like that.

Dave_The_Sheep · 29-09-2015 02:20AM

The King of Moo wrote: »

While the customer was undoubtedly an ass, it's pretty poor form to lie like that.

I would feel bad but... I really don't. When you come in acting the arsehole, you can't complain when someone sticks their finger up you.

**** them.

bucketybuck · 29-09-2015 08:57AM

The King of Moo wrote: »

While the customer was undoubtedly an ass, it's pretty poor form to lie like that.

Won't somebody please think of the scumbags!!!!

arayess · 29-09-2015 09:47AM

Dave_The_Sheep wrote: »

I would feel bad but... I really don't. When you come in acting the arsehole, you can't complain when someone sticks their finger up you.

**** them.

maybe he didn't wash them and only said it to get a credit note and get out of the shop from the aggressive sale assistant.

DamienOB · 29-09-2015 10:59AM

In an office environment only 3 months ago. The boss brought in his son's girlfriend from some data entry. She has just got her leaving cert results, around aged 18 or so.

Me: Will you type these into these columns on excel all the way along the page?
Her: No Problem

20 mins later

Her: Sorry I need you to set up another one for me
Me: What? Why?
Her: Well I'm on column X. What happens once I get to Z I'm finished?

I questioned my life that day

Frynge · 29-09-2015 11:03AM

Ah come on. You have to make some allowances for the completely inexperienced. If she was 25 or something I would say lobotomy, but first day, in first job, working for a friend. There are so many ways in which she could have been worse.

Frynge · 29-09-2015 11:13AM

The King of Moo wrote: »

While the customer was undoubtedly an ass, it's pretty poor form to lie like that.

I have to disagree, when I was being trained in customer service, it was instilled in us That we are to look after the customer as best we can unless they are either rude, obnoxious or racist, at which point our job became removing them from the premises.

razorblunt · 29-09-2015 11:21AM

As bad as that lie told to the customer above, having worked in a sports store some folk really do try everything to get a new pair or runners a few months into wearing out their new pair. We'd have to get to a stage of issuing a refund and then barring customers from the store when it was quite obviousl what they were up to.

This isn't really a request but it's a headscratcher, in the above sportstore, back 11/12 years ago those Adidas Superstars were going through a popular phase, you'd get new colours in every couple of weeks. At one stage just before Xmas the womens selection had two very similar coloured striped, one in blue, the other in an identical blue but with what can only be described as glitter going through the stripe. They were priced at €70 and €77 respectively. One of the lads having sold a display shoe replaced the cheaper one with with the more expensive one. This was just on the pricetag, the actual barcode was still scanning at €70.
Anyway, a lady was buying the non glitter pair (she didn't like the glitter, fair enough), when she got to the till she was told the price was €70 and completely flipped the lid. The cashier didn't know what was going on so I was called and sent off to investigate, came back after 5 minutes saying, it was incorrectly priced higher on the shelf and they definitely are the lower price and added "I'll go change that now". She had a 30 minute back and forth argument with me, the cashier, the manager and other customers about how what we were doing is illegal and shouldnt be allowed get away with it. She even threatened to have the local talk show radio host on to us. The radio show called on Monday, were told what happened and never called back.
She ended up buying them anyway.

draiochtanois · 29-09-2015 11:32AM

This post has been deleted.

somesoldiers · 29-09-2015 11:50AM

DamienOB wrote: »

In an office environment only 3 months ago. The boss brought in his son's girlfriend from some data entry. She has just got her leaving cert results, around aged 18 or so.

Me: Will you type these into these columns on excel all the way along the page?
Her: No Problem

20 mins later

Her: Sorry I need you to set up another one for me
Me: What? Why?
Her: Well I'm on column X. What happens once I get to Z I'm finished?

I questioned my life that day

Highly inefficient and with huge scope for error to have someone type data into a spreadsheet anyway I would have thought. Where was the data coming from, is there no way to automate the process?

RDM_83 again · 29-09-2015 12:53PM

somesoldiers wrote: »

Highly inefficient and with huge scope for error to have someone type data into a spreadsheet anyway I would have thought. Where was the data coming from, is there no way to automate the process?

Used to data entry nixers generally major cash rich entities (at the time Celtic Tiger, how things change), I would guess if there was a better method than people they would have used it. If its running of scans and then automated you would probably have to go through and check it anyway and would be more likely to miss something.

alcea · 29-09-2015 06:53PM

Billy86 wrote: »

Another one in car insurance is people from WEST Cork (good jaysus, they cannot make it nearly clear enough that it is WEST Cork) calling in to complain that their docs just say 'County Cork'. Pretentious eejits (not sure if the new post codes have made this allowable at all now though - doubt it, mind).

Maybe his post could be going through the wrong sorting office and have to be re-routed through a different sorting office. This would mean that by the time he gets what you sent him, there maybe a sticker on the envelope requesting him to put West Cork on his address. Eircode cannot work if people and courier companies don't use it.

Melisandre121 · 29-09-2015 06:58PM

When I worked in a restaurant I was once asked by a customer to open up the toilets because he really needed to go and didn't want to wait on the person in there to be finished.

I'm not joking.

Badly Drunk Boy · 29-09-2015 07:18PM

alcea wrote: »

Maybe his post could be going through the wrong sorting office and have to be re-routed through a different sorting office. This would mean that by the time he gets what you sent him, there maybe a sticker on the envelope requesting him to put West Cork on his address. Eircode cannot work if people and courier companies don't use it.

But there isn't a place that's officially called 'West Cork'. If the town or village that the person lives has a unique place-name in Co. Cork, I don't see the problem.

alcea · 29-09-2015 07:25PM

Badly Drunk Boy wrote: »

But there isn't a place that's officially called 'West Cork'. If the town or village that the person lives has a unique place-name in Co. Cork, I don't see the problem.

It all depends on the postmans route, a townland could be split between two routes depending on the size and layout of the townland.

mattP · 29-09-2015 07:26PM

"So show me what you did since you came in?"
Bitch you should know youre watching me like a hawk since I came in the ****ing door

alcea · 29-09-2015 07:26PM

Badly Drunk Boy wrote: »

But there isn't a place that's officially called 'West Cork'. If the town or village that the person lives has a unique place-name in Co. Cork, I don't see the problem.

There are probably more than one sorting office in Cork, hence the West Cork. It all depends on the postmans route, a townland could be split between two routes depending on the size and layout of the townland.

29-09-2015 07:57PM

I work in a supermarket off licence. I had a customer in a mad panic come in a while back demanding to know what consultant's drink. Had another guy in pacing up and down the spirits section examining all the whiskey we sell. Asked him if there was anything in particular he was looking for, fire lighters he says.

Sand · 29-09-2015 08:33PM

somesoldiers wrote: »

Highly inefficient and with huge scope for error to have someone type data into a spreadsheet anyway I would have thought. Where was the data coming from, is there no way to automate the process?

The world quite literally runs on spreadsheets. Sure, systems and automation would be better. But that costs money. Whereas running hugely risky process on the back of some formulas in a spreadsheet will never come back and bite you in the ass.

Management 101.

meeeeh · 29-09-2015 10:18PM

Not exactly to me but I used to do some admin stuff in my parent's mechanical workshop/tyre business/ car equipment stuff. We got plenty of stupid requests. Someone showed up with a wartburg (I don't even know where he found one) asking for springs to be cut so the car will have more sporty look.

The worst one though was a customer looking for used tyres which was not unusual. Because there was (still is); strict winter tyres in winter policy most people would alternate between two sets and sometimes a car would be sold and a set of perfectly good tyres would be left with us. Co-worker checked and told him there is nothing in size he needs. So the customer starts going through the tyres left to be recycled and finds four. The co-worker tells him that they are almost bald and no way is he putting that on the car. And the guy replies: 'they will be fine, I have small kids so I drive slowly. We sent him away in complete disbelief.

suicide_circus · 29-09-2015 10:38PM

mr.anonymous wrote: »

A relative worked in a hotel years ago and a few farmers came in for lunch..

"Would you like some serviettes?"

"Yeah, give us a plate of them"

I was in a little restaurant in bessington and in comes a farmer in wellies and a flat cap and sits down, refuses the waitresses offer of a menu and just said "The best you have". He answered all the waitresses probing questions trying to figure out what he might like with " the best you have". It was quite sweet actually.

Billy86 · 29-09-2015 11:08PM

alcea wrote: »

Maybe his post could be going through the wrong sorting office and have to be re-routed through a different sorting office. This would mean that by the time he gets what you sent him, there maybe a sticker on the envelope requesting him to put West Cork on his address. Eircode cannot work if people and courier companies don't use it.

Nope, it was entirely Dow to the fact his cert, disc, etc did not proudly display WEST Cork to anyone bothered to glance at them.

languagenerd · 29-09-2015 11:19PM

"Do you have any [product I've never heard of]?"
"Sorry, no, but I'll check with our suppliers and see if we could order something in for you. Do you know who makes them?"
"Well, they were used in China, mostly in the 14th century. Can you get one in?"

What?!
(It was not an antiques store, and we didn't do specifically Asian products either btw)

mr.anonymous · 30-09-2015 12:18AM

suicide_circus wrote: »

I was in a little restaurant in bessington and in comes a farmer in wellies and a flat cap and sits down, refuses the waitresses offer of a menu and just said "The best you have". He answered all the waitresses probing questions trying to figure out what he might like with " the best you have". It was quite sweet actually.

Reminds me of an old man I served before. "Anything at all" was his answer. Had to stop myself saying "you might as well choose seeing as you're ****ing paying for it!"

starling · 30-09-2015 12:21AM

suicide_circus wrote: »

I was in a little restaurant in bessington and in comes a farmer in wellies and a flat cap and sits down, refuses the waitresses offer of a menu and just said "The best you have". He answered all the waitresses probing questions trying to figure out what he might like with " the best you have". It was quite sweet actually.

Aw, that sounds like the ending of some kind of adorable and uplifting film in which the salt of the earth farmer is swamped with debt and things are looking grim, but he (and possibly his pet pig) have done something exciting and inspiring, and there's been financial reward, and now that he's saved the farm and paid off his debts, the farmer has decided he's finally going to make good on his promise to himself (mentioned earlier in the film, obvs) that he will go in to the best restaurant in town and get "the best" for himself, for once in his life. Perhaps his dying wife even told him on her deathbed that she had watched him putting others first his whole life and now she wanted him to promise her that he would go to the restaurant and get "the best" for himself...... Except you and the waitress were only in the final scene, so you have no idea about any of it.

starling · 30-09-2015 12:23AM

languagenerd wrote: »

"Do you have any [product I've never heard of]?"
"Sorry, no, but I'll check with our suppliers and see if we could order something in for you. Do you know who makes them?"
"Well, they were used in China, mostly in the 14th century. Can you get one in?"

What?!
(It was not an antiques store, and we didn't do specifically Asian products either btw)

Really wondering what they wanted and what it was used for, cause that's weird...

Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

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