Praveen Halappanavar says he has received abusive letters

eviltwin · 04-07-2013 01:46PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

How would you feel if you lost a very young successful wife along with your baby?

That's an awful lot to lose.

I don't believe anyone can be so calm and reserved, especially so soon after it happened. Not even an apathetic person could be so calm and almost indifferent. It just doesn't look sincere, sorry, but it really doesn't.

His wife died last year, time that I'm sure he has used to grieve his loss. Its totally understandable that he can do an interview months later and not be an emotional mess.

Karl Stein · 04-07-2013 01:47PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

While I'm fully against those abusive letters he has received, I do think there's something suspicious about him. When I watched the interview with Miriam O'Callaghan, I got the distinct impression he didn't really 'care' as much as a husband should do. He didn't even appear despondent. I'm aware that organised marriages occur within their faith and so it wouldn't surprise me if this is how it happened and would explain his lack of emotion for the situation. I knew he would eventually sue the HSE for cash and this fits perfectly within my model that he is merely thinking of his own pockets to capitalise on her death. I know that sounds bad given the tragic circumstances in which she died but if I had a wife that died in such circumstances, I personally would not want to gain a cent from it. I think there's something morally reprehensible, as well as suspicious, to gain cash at the expense of a death.

Creepy.

stimpson · 04-07-2013 01:47PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

How would you feel if you lost a very young successful wife along with your baby?

That's an awful lot to lose.

I don't believe anyone can be so calm and reserved, especially so soon after it happened. Not even an apathetic person could be so calm and almost indifferent. It just doesn't look sincere, sorry, but it really doesn't.

So how many letters did you write?

wretcheddomain · 04-07-2013 01:47PM

LizT wrote: »

If he was sobbing with grief in every interview, people would say he's over doing it to win sympathy.

The man simply cannot win.

Not at all - I think he was being honest and himself in the interview, which is precisely why I have my views on it.

But think about it, losing a wife in her early thirties and a soon-to-be-born baby?

That would *destroy* any husband's life, completely and entirely.

To be so reserved on interview, being watched by hundreds of thousands, and appear so indifferent soon after she died, does not make sense to me at all. I think anyone who cared would not be able to even withstand such an interview with all the pressure that comes with it. I think my view on this is reasonable despite the objections here.

padd b1975 · 04-07-2013 01:47PM

Lapin wrote: »

What kind of bollox is that ?

A man receives abusive mail with racist undertones about his wife who died in clearly tragic circumstances, instead of filing a complaint with the Gardaí, he decides to talk to the media.

That's bollox.

endacl · 04-07-2013 01:47PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

How would you feel if you lost a very young successful wife along with your baby?

That's an awful lot to lose.

I don't believe anyone can be so calm and reserved, especially so soon after it happened. Not even an apathetic person could be so calm and almost indifferent. It just doesn't look sincere, sorry, but it really doesn't.

How can people post such bull**** and expect to be taken seriously?

It just doesn't look sincere, sorry, but it really doesn't.

eviltwin · 04-07-2013 01:48PM

padd b1975 wrote: »

A man receives abusive mail with racist undertones about his wife who died in clearly tragic circumstances, instead of filing a complaint with the Gardaí, he decides to talk to the media.

That's bollox.

How do you know he hasn't been in touch with Gardai

LizT · 04-07-2013 01:51PM

padd b1975 wrote: »

A man receives abusive mail with racist undertones about his wife who died in clearly tragic circumstances, instead of filing a complaint with the Gardaí, he decides to talk to the media.

That's bollox.

To be fair, the article doesn't say whether or not he's spoken to the Gardai about it.

wretcheddomain · 04-07-2013 01:51PM

KKkitty wrote: »

For all we know the poor man could be on anti depressants just to get through the day. You don't know him personally and have no idea what's going through his head on a daily basis.

I could mirror that back at you and say for all we know he really doesn't care as much as he claims to, nor do you know him personally to adduce he cares and you've also no idea what's going through his head on a daily basis.

padd b1975 · 04-07-2013 01:51PM

eviltwin wrote: »

How do you know he hasn't been in touch with Gardai

How do you know he has?

I can't find any mention of it either way in the numerous links I checked online.

kylith · 04-07-2013 01:51PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

How would you feel if you lost a very young successful wife along with your baby?

That's an awful lot to lose.

I don't believe anyone can be so calm and reserved, especially so soon after it happened. Not even an apathetic person could be so calm and almost indifferent. It just doesn't look sincere, sorry, but it really doesn't.

So he should still be in tears 8 months after the event? When would be seemly for him to stop grieving? A year? Two? Never?

Many people lose spouses and children, and some to greater tragedies than Mr. Halappanavar. Do you insist that those who've lost spouses to murders be inconsolable months later? Should someone whose child has been killed in a RTA wear their mourning clothes indefinitely to satisfy what you deem to be acceptable?

What evidence do you have that Mr. Halappanavar does not swallow his pain when giving interviews and go home and weep for the wife he lost?

intellectual dosser · 04-07-2013 01:53PM

padd b1975 wrote: »

A man receives abusive mail with racist undertones about his wife who died in clearly tragic circumstances, instead of filing a complaint with the Gardaí, he decides to talk to the media.

That's bollox.

I havent heard the interview Padd, I was lead to believe it was about a topic very much in the limelight in Ireland at the moment, and that the abusive letters would have simply come up over the course of the conversation.

I guess you're saying the interview was held just so that he could publicly state that he had received the abusive mail.

Thanks for clearing it up.

padd b1975 · 04-07-2013 01:53PM

LizT wrote: »

To be fair, the article doesn't say whether or not he's spoken to the Gardai about it.

I think it's reasonable to expect a mention of it if he had.

Lapin · 04-07-2013 01:53PM

padd b1975 wrote: »

A man receives abusive mail with racist undertones about his wife who died in clearly tragic circumstances, instead of filing a complaint with the Gardaí, he decides to talk to the media.

That's bollox.

Thats not what you said.

This is.

padd b1975 wrote: »

Had to get his publicity from the media first....

How do you know he hasn't handed the letters to the Gardaí ?

Accusing him of being a publicity seeker in his circumstances is cynical in the extreme.

If anything, you could be accused of the same by trying to gain a cheap shot here.

Nodin · 04-07-2013 01:53PM

padd b1975 wrote: »

A man receives abusive mail with racist undertones about his wife who died in clearly tragic circumstances, instead of filing a complaint with the Gardaí, he decides to talk to the media.

That's bollox.

Not really.

I'll tell ye what is though.

eviltwin · 04-07-2013 01:54PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

I could mirror that back at you and say for all we know he really doesn't care as much as he claims to, nor do you know him personally to adduce he cares and you've also no idea what's going through his head on a daily basis.

The only person who knows how Praveen really feels is Praveen.

But most people probably look at the man who has lost his wife and child in unexpected and tragic circumstances and now not only has to deal with that but has hate mail to contend with on top of it and feel sympathy for him.

Now you want to add "money grabber" to the mix? Not every husband who has lost a wife is a Joe O'reilly. Ffs have a bit of empathy for the man. You should be ashamed of yourself.

LizT · 04-07-2013 01:54PM

padd b1975 wrote: »

I think it's reasonable to expect a mention of it if he had.

Not really

wp_rathead · 04-07-2013 01:55PM

Shame this thread got hijacked by some posters attempt of profiling a griefing widower- sounds like the chap watched few box sets of Criminal Minds and went "ara Ican do that" (I know charter is "attack post not poster" but really pissed me off)

Any how back on topic:
Disgusting that this man got hate mail..
Also is disgusting that so many Galway West TDs, where this tragedy happened, voted against the abortion bill

wretcheddomain · 04-07-2013 01:55PM

kylith wrote: »

So he should still be in tears 8 months after the event? When would be seemly for him to stop grieving? A year? Two? Never?

I'm not referring to how he is now.

I'm specifically referring to his interview with Miriam O'Callaghan about 2-3 weeks after the death of Savita.

She died on 28th October 2012, the interview was broadcast on 21 November 2012.

Go and watch the interview and tell me that 2-3 weeks after you lose a wife and baby under tragic circumstances, you could even believe the sincerity. I doubt you'll be able to.

intellectual dosser · 04-07-2013 01:56PM

I don't suppose we'll get to learn who sent the abusive mail?

Professey Chin · 04-07-2013 01:57PM

intellectual dosser wrote: »

I don't suppose we'll get to learn who sent the abusive mail?

The initials Y.D. or affiliated comes to mind

LizT · 04-07-2013 01:57PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

I'm not referring to how he is now.

I'm specifically referring to his interview with Miriam O'Callaghan about 2-3 weeks after the death of Savita.

She died on 28th October 2012, the interview was broadcast on 21 November 2012.

How should he have acted?

That, in itself, is a stupid question. There's no "normal" reaction to gauge this against, everyone grieves differently.

laoch na mona · 04-07-2013 01:57PM

some people are ****ing scum and they seem to radiate towards the abortion debate

intellectual dosser · 04-07-2013 01:58PM

Chinpool wrote: »

The initials Y.D. or affiliated comes to mind

That's what everybody is assuming -and it would be reasonably consistent. But still would prefer confirmation before everyone starts bashing.

eviltwin · 04-07-2013 01:58PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

I'm not referring to how he is now.

I'm specifically referring to his interview with Miriam O'Callaghan about 2-3 weeks after the death of Savita.

She died on 28th October 2012, the interview was broadcast on 21 November 2012.

Shock will do that to a person. I've seen first hand people be stong and stoic in the face of a terrible tragedy only to break down months after the fact. Some are just great at keeping their emotions in check while in public. Maybe he felt he needed to do that interview for Savita and his daughter and that kept him strong throughout.

wretcheddomain · 04-07-2013 02:00PM

laoch na mona wrote: »

some people are ****ing scum and they seem to radiate towards the abortion debate

I'm actually pro-choice. But anyway, I don't wish to divert the thread any further concerning my views given as the OP suggested, it was about the hate mail, which I'm fervently against in all its forms by the way, and I reject the comments made from some other posters that I may have sent a hate mail. That's something I'd never do and completely against given the circumstances.

Shock will do that to a person. I've seen first hand people be stong and stoic in the face of a terrible tragedy only to break down months after the fact. Some are just great at keeping their emotions in check while in public. Maybe he felt he needed to do that interview for Savita and his daughter and that kept him strong throughout.

I completely understand that and think there's truth to it. The problem I have is that while there's a chance you're right, nobody is even willing to contemplate that there's a chance, however small, that it's not right. Instead, accusations of 's***' and other derogatory comments get thrown around. People should be open to the possibility however disturbing it may be. Going back to the Joe O'Reilly case, I'm sure many people would have been accused of being sick and twisted for suggesting he could have killed his wife, but alas, they were vindicated. All I'm saying is be open to the possibility instead of shooting down everyone who offers an alternative perspective to this tragedy.

MissFlitworth · 04-07-2013 02:01PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

I'm specifically referring to his interview with Miriam O'Callaghan about 2-3 weeks after the death of Savita.

She died on 28th October 2012, the interview was broadcast on 21 November 2012.

Go and watch the interview and tell me that 2-3 weeks after you lose a wife and baby under tragic circumstances, you could even believe the sincerity. I doubt you'll be able to.

Shock?
Tranquilizers?
Anti-depressants?
Determination to get her story out?

It seriously sounds like you're saying that from the time his wife died he was like 'cha ching! bit of a claim here Praveen my son'. People deal with loss in their own way, just because he hasn't done it in a way you find acceptable doesn't make your theory anything less than a load of hairy, offensive old balls. From anyone I know who has lost someone suddenly and tragically the reaction leans more towards 'being a robot' than tears for the first while

endacl · 04-07-2013 02:02PM

wretcheddomain wrote: »

I could mirror that back at you and say for all we know he really doesn't care as much as he claims to, nor do you know him personally to adduce he cares and you've also no idea what's going through his head on a daily basis.

You could. But that style of sophistic tail-chasing would be more appropriate to a conversation that didn't involve a bereavement as a result of medical negligence. I really don't think this is a suitable topic for small minded points scoring.

NinjaTruncs · 04-07-2013 02:03PM

Radiosonde wrote: »

He's looking for a full public enquiry, not compensation, FFS.

That's not quite accurate. While he wants a public inquiry, he's also suing for damages according to the report on breakingnews.ie

The claim will be for injures, distress and the loss of his wife.

04-07-2013 02:03PM

Sounds like someone hasn't heard of delayed grief

Praveen Halappanavar says he has received abusive letters

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