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Twisted Tag Tournament
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Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 47,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭
Join Date:Posts: 47582
The dirty funnymen claim victory and move on.BATTLE 15
JUDGE DREDD & DEAN WINCHESTER
VS.
DIAMONDBACK(RACHEL LEIGHTON) & CATMAN
LOCATION:
TORONTO, ONTARIO
While observing the testing of a new power generating system Joseph Dredd is thrown backwards in time when the device malfunctions. He is found on the outskirts of Toronto by Dean Winchester who convinces him that he is an agent for Homeland Security in need of backup preventing a terrorist attack on a local museum. Meanwhile Robert Blake has been hired by a cult who claim to worship the goddess Bast to retrieve an artifact from said museum. He has recruited Diamondback to assist him in exchange for a large sum of money. Unfortunately for them they are surprised by the Hunting Judge.0 -
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In theory, it seems like a fairly straight forward fight however Dredd can not be beaten so I give you Chewbacca
Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!
Why would a Wookiee, an 8-foot-tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of 2-foot-tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a poster defending a major badass, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.
Dean and Dredd ftw0 -
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Fifteen years in the academy
He was like no cadet they'd ever seen
Joe sticks Dean in an Iso cube because he looks like a "drokken perp"
A man so hard, his veins bleed ice
And when he speaks he never says it twice
Then Dredd mounts up, and goes looking for Diamondback and Catman. He shows them exactly what 15 years in the academy followed by 40 odd years on the street of Mega City One creates.
They call him Judge, his last name is Dredd
So break the law, and you wind up dead
A Clint Eastwood like scowl and two well placed shots later, Dredd is biking away towards Rowdy Yates block to try and find out who is playing that song about him.
Truth and justice are what he's fighting for
Judge Dredd the man, he is the law
DROKK IT!
Dredd for the win.
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Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 47,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭ Join Date:Posts: 47582
Hunting Judge takes the victoryBATTLE 16
ROLAND DESCHAIN & ZORRO
VS
ELLEN RIPLEY & BATMAN
LOCATION:
NEW YAWK CITY
Roland Deschain's quest has brought him to a dying city where he encounters a strange fellow who claims to be a hero on a quest similar to his own. Meanwhile on his journey back to his own time Bruce Wayne has found himself allied with a half-crazed woman claiming to be form his future. he has located an a cache of equipment left behind by his now deceased alternate on this world. His only clue to moving on is break into the tower at the center of the city. Standing in his way however is apparently his childhood hero and a gunslinger from the Wild West.
NOTES:
1. Ripley is carrying an M141A battle rifle(no flamethrower)
2. Batman has his default equipment
3. Zorro is carrying his rapier, whip, and two single shot pistolssorry about this one going up late folks0 -
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Noooooooooooooo.
Not only does Roland get a crap partner, he is also up against Batman.
Right all four meet in the street.
Ripley opens fire and Zorro gets hit. He drops to his knees dying, his mind unable to take in the amount of damage done to him by the strange weapon being carried by the tall woman.
Ripley starts to adjust her aim towards Roland when she realises she is in pain and that her vision is starting to blur.
She looks down to see a blood stain on her shirt, and then looks up to see Roland with his gun smoking.
Roland then turns to take out Batman. But finds the street empty.
A game of cat and mouse begins, but although he thinks he is the hunter, Roland is watched and followed by Batman. Bats then comes in close, disarms Roland and incapacitates him. Dropping him off later at Arkham Asylum.
Bats and Rips for the win.0 -
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Dawn rises over New York city or at least a version of it. Gone are the sounds of vehicles moving through the streets, it's replaced with a silence that seems to promise violence.
We follow the sun as it slowly climbs a tower of steel and glass. The third floor of the building is where our story begins. Roland Deschain is the name of the man who we see sleeping in one of the rooms. Although you'd be a fool to think that you could catch him unawares even though he sleeps.
The sunlight has only begun to touch him when he rises to meet it. He makes his way to the window, all the while skirting the edge of the shadows.
He scans the city that is slowly being to revealed to him. The view reveals more buildings which could be mirror images of the building he currently occupies.
Then off to the righthand corner of the buildings before him, he notices a building that looms over the buildings surrounding it.
"A tower. It's always a tower." He had almost dared to hope that things would be different this time.
Roland returns to where he left his possessions. He dons his coat and hat, then checks his pistols to confirm all is as it should be.
"Time to make a move I guess." he thinks to himself.
He makes his way down the stairs to the lobby of the building. He slowly makes his way to one of the windows beside the entrance. Once he's reasonably sure that nothing sinister is waiting for him in the street outside, he makes his exit from the building.
The city still remains too quiet, only punctuated by the sounds of some animals in the distance.
Travel through the city is slow going as there are too many possible locations for an attack. Roland keeps to shadows as best he can and makes every effort to make as little sound as possible.
Eventually he can see the tower in the distance. This is were the fun begins, as he knows only too well from experience.
While making some preliminary scouting of the area around the tower, he catches some sounds of someone tracking him. Unsure as to what his unwelcome shadow has planned for him, he decides to err on the side of caution.
He picks up some speed to put a little distance between him and the person behind him, but at the same time not enough that he will lose him/her.
The pursuit lasts a few minutes before the stalker enters a room only to see Roland kneeling beside a window. Slowly he makes his way up to Roland.
*CLICK*
"Stop right there or I drop you where you stand." barks Roland from behind the stalker.
The stalker stops in his tracks.
"Now explain exactly what you were doing following me so I can decide what to do with you."
"I noticed you circling the tower and I presumed you also plan to try entering it. It calls to you too doesn't it?"
"So what if I am? Whats it matter to you?" Roland replies.
"I like you, don't belong here and wish to get back home. I woke in this city two days ago and have been trying to figure out how to get home since. Then early this morning something began to guide me to the tower."
All this sounds exactly like the position that Roland now finds himself in.
"Listen, stranger, allow me to give you some information that may aid you. I arrived here before you and while surveying the tower, I spotted two others. A woman and what appears to be a man dressed as a bat."
"And how does this help me?" askes Roland.
"They don't mean to make friends. The woman was quite quick to open fire on me when I made a little too much noise tracking her. The other seems to have made an alliance with her. That means that the odds aren't im my favour if I wish to enter the tower."
"But two against two? That sounds like a better scenario for me. Whatever you decide, I mean to enter the tower, with or without you."
"Very well", says Roland as he holsters his pistol, "but if we're to be allies I must have a name to call you."
"You may call me Zorro." answers the stalker.
With that Roland retrieves his coat from beside the window. It was actually a chair with a pile of clothes on it, all concealed by his coat.
"And you may call me Roland."
"Alirght then, Roland. If we are to enter the tower we need a strategy to disable the guardians. The costumed male seems to favour the higher parts of the buildings and the rooftops. The woman keeps mainly to the streets. but I'm pretty sure that they're both aware of the others location most of the time."
"Ok, Mr.Z, this is what we'll do........."
Later as the day winds to an end, Roland makes his way slowly towards the tower. But this time he foregoes the safety of the shadows.
"Stop right where you are and put your hands in the air." shouts a distinctly female voice from further down the street.
Roland complies, raising his hands slowly so as to show Ripley that has no weapons in his hands.
Ripley makes her way from the doorway towards Roland.
"So, you're the one thats been sneaking around here."
"No, that would be me." replies Zorro as his whip latches onto Ripleys rifle. At the same time Roland launches a small rock that was concealed in his palm at Ripleys head.
Suddenly a batrang screams through the air and deflects the rock away from Ripley. Within seconds Rolands pistols were out of their holsters and firing at the line that Batman was swinging towards them on.
Through skill rather than luck, one of the bullets cuts clean through the line just as batman approaches Roland. This alters his flight enough for Roland to evade him.
Batman lands and is gone from sight before Roland can bring his guns to bear on him.
He spots Ripley and Zorro still battling it out. Somehow it's managed to become a fist-fight between the two of them. This unfortunately means that Ripley is soon overpowered by Zorro.
“What happened to our rodent friend?” askes Zorro.
“Looks like he found a hole in a wall to vanish through. Let's not wait around for him to reappear.”
The duo enter the tower.
“We take the stairs, that metal box (the lift) is begging to be nothing but trouble for us.” says Roland as he points to the stairwell.
They make their way to the top floor. Once they burst through the doorway, the spot a costumed man sitting at the far end of the room.
“Ah, I guess you must be the two who I'm to transport home. You may call me Dr.Fate. I was sent here to return two people that are out of place.”
Zorro and Roland cautiously make their way towards Dr.Fate.
Without warning one of the windows explodes inwards as Batman flies towards Zorro. Zorro takes the full force of Batmans attack and is propelled out through the window on the far side of the room.
“Nooooo!!” shouts Roland as he opens fire on Batman. Batman manages to evade the gunfire while at the same time throwing two batrangs at Roland. Rolands guns are knocked from his hands.
This means nothing is left but for the two of them to battle it out hand to hand. At this point, Batmans superior fighting skills prove to be more than a match for anything Roland throws at him.
Batman makes short work of Roland.
With the battle at an end, Dr.Fate approaches Batman.
“I am here to return two, where is your other?”
“Wait here.”
Moments later, Batman returns with Ripley. “Ok, Doc, we're ready to go.”
With that Dr.Fate opens a portal back to Ripleys time. She steps through and the portal fades away behind her.
Next Dr.Fate opens a portal to Gotham. Batman steps through.
Roland regains conciousness just in time to see the portal close behind Batman.
A cry of “Noooooooooo!” rings out through the city.
Fin
Music to play us out.
Batman + RipleyIf you can read this, you're too close!
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Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 47,868 Mod ✭✭✭✭ Join Date:Posts: 47582
Batley claim victory, quelle surprise.
VS.
LEATHERFACE & MICHAEL MYERS
LOCATION:
S-MART FLINT, MICHIGAN
Lured to Michigan on the pretense of a rematch with Squirrel Girl(curse her squirrel agility saving her when tossed from castle walls) the captain was instead ambushed by a madman who has devoted himself to releasing the dark gods of the Necronomicon upon the Earth. Using the book he has stripped the captain of the mystic energy that allows him to transform into his bestial form. His plan called for the sacrifice of the captain and The Chosen One. Fortunately for the captain, Ash showed up with the boomstick at the ready. Fighting their way free of the makeshift temple Ash and Cyberwolf have holed up in the local S-Mart. Isolated from the outside world they have attempted to make contact with anyone who can come their aid against the madman's army of death which stalks the Earth. The only hero they were able to reach however was Squirrel Girl, who was still a bit upset about the whole being thrown off a castle thing. She did pass along the info that two of the madman's generals summoned from horror films have been dispatched to kill the two escapees.
NOTE: ALL COMPETITORS HAVE THEIR SIGNATURE WEAPONS AVAILABLE TO THEM.*Cyberwolf is human for this match. He remains a fair street fighter, and is armed with a klaive attuned to him, a mid-sized folding knife, and a kukri knife on his belt.0 -
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQ9oIIzMrlA![[Deleted User]](/applications/dashboard/design/images/defaulticon.png)
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