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No confidence or ambition

  • 22-04-2009 04:06PM
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,005 ✭✭✭✭


    I don't really know what to say here, I guess I'm looking for some advice or maybe some pointers. My PI is that I've got very low self confidence and I've got no ambition or drive to do anything anyway meaningful in my life. To some it up I just can't be bothered doing anything.

    As for ambition, I want to make something of myself, I want to work harder and be successful but saying these things to myself is one thing and actually doing them is another. How do I motivate myself?

    In regards to self confidence, it's pretty much shot. I've been messed around a lot by a woman I've got strong feelings for over the last 9 months or so. I think I've made my peace with that but I'm an absolute mess these days still as a result.

    I know you'll be reading this and thinking what am I on about, it's just hard to articulate what's in my head.

    Any comments good or bad would be appreciated, thanks for reading.


Comments

  • #2
    karen3212
    Closed Accounts Posts: 668 ✭✭✭karen3212


    Hi op,

    Are you interested at all in the work you do, or what it means to other people in the world where you live. If you are not interested in loadza money only, then you may need to think about how you want to affect the people around you during your life.

    Try and accept yourself and perhaps by thinking about your life you could make challenges for yourself, (very little ones to start), and with achievements confidence may come.

    On the other hand if you have lost interest in everything in your world you may need to speak to a counsellor to identify an interest that you could work on - or perhaps you can remember something you used to love doing when young and try and make a career out of it.

    If you and your girlfriend are unsuited to each other and it's making you miserable, then you are better off out of the relationship - have you spoken to her about how your relationship is working/not?

    Last but not least, have a chat with your doctor, just in case it's something more serious. Goodluck


  • #3
    aineolach
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 66 ✭✭aineolach


    As for ambition, I want to make something of myself, I want to work harder and be successful but saying these things to myself is one thing and actually doing them is another. How do I motivate myself?

    Here's a question for you: what does being "successful" mean to you?


  • #4
    E.L
    Closed Accounts Posts: 49 ✭E.L


    Do you think you may have depression?
    I have suffered from it myself and the way you are feeliing it looks like it to me.
    You have already made the effort to post here and admit you want change but nobody is going to come along and hand it to you.
    Have a think about the small things you can do today to make this day better, maybe visit friends or do a selfless act.
    Then make plans for tommorow, eventually maybe do an evening course in a hobby or new skill so you can meet people.
    You can make your life better and nobody has to know you have low confidence, pretend your a confident person and people will take you as one eventually you will feel that real confidence.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKjETB5pqdU


  • #5
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,005 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi OP,

    I think everyone feels like this at some stage, someone posed the question how do you define success, i recently had to answer this myself and realized i had been heavily influenced by societies opinion that being monetarily rich is the definition or being the next president or something or being an acaedemic.

    I have learnt to find myself in the last year, i challenged my thinking and learned how to accept myself, my depression is totally gone and i have found new ways to define success.

    I now define it by how good i feel about myself and i try and love myself better. Everything in my life seems to be working now, i was poor had no family no job and was really down.


    I did some positive thinking through books and cds at home kept a journal to talk back to myself and brought gratitude into my life, the more you can appreciate the little things in life the more you bring it in, like your hands eyes, house, car, favourite tree, friends anyone you really have, write out as many as you can and your thinking will change.


    Please see in you what is special and appreciate that, deep down we all know what we really want, i realized i wanted to work from home and now i am!


    G'luck


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