Cannabis withdrawal after 26 years smoking

LegacyUser · 14-04-2009 10:31PM #1

My husband smokes morning, noon and night. He had a very bad childhood and has been smoking hash since the age of 12. He is at the stage in his life where he hates the stuff but is completely addicted. He smokes grass now which is very expensive. Every penny we have goes on it. If he runs out he turns into a raving lunatic. He smokes a joint every hour and no one except his dealers know he smokes at all. To our family and friends he appears perfectly normal.
He worked until recently. Losing his job has really brought things to a head as he was paying for his smoke himself. I had no idea just how bad he had become. It is costing about €200 a week now. Add the cost of cigarettes to that and it is a serious amount of money. There is also the health side. His chest is terrible.
He has tried stopping in the past but the withdrawals were too bad, he would be extremely agitated, unable to sleep, unable to concentrate, very very depressed, severe mood swings from aggression to depression. He is determined he is going to do it this time. He has set a date for next week.
I am posting here because I am hoping someone here may be able to advise me on how to get him and me through it as quickly and easily as possible. I can cope with most of the withdrawals except for the aggression. He is not aggressive normally and I find it very frightening to see him like that. When he is in that state there is no reasoning with him and he usually ends up going back on smoke just to calm down. This time he cannot do that as we have completely run out of money. His doctor has prescribed him xanax, I just dont know if that will be enough.

niceoneted · 14-04-2009 10:37PM

It might be worth paying for him to have professional help in an addicts clinic. Don't know any off hand sorry but I think after all these years and the amount being used it's pros he needs.
Best of luck.

LegacyUser · 14-04-2009 10:47PM

He wont go - I have suggested it. We have private health cover that would cover most of the cost. He had a nervous breakdown when he was a teenager and was sectioned by his Mum. He hates anything like that since.

cafecolour · 14-04-2009 11:08PM

Wow, congrats to your BF for finally trying to quit. It will not be easy, but best of luck to him - and you.

First off, the bad news. If he's been smoking 26 years, it will likely take at least 30-45 days for him to be completely have the weed out of his system. Emotionally though - he's never dealt with the world sober as an adult. That alone can be a challenge - and worsen the aggression.

In addition, if he's been smoking the hash or weed in combo with tobacco for 26 years, it means he's also withdrawing from nicotine - an even harder, and more physically addictive drug to a quit. If that's the case, perhaps he should try quitting one at a time - ie stop smoking weed but keep smoking tobacco for the first month or two.

Finally, Xanax is a strong tranquilizer and anti-depressant. For most people, it should reduce the aggression, though for some, it could increase it. However, it's also addictive, more so then weed even, so make sure he's not using it beyond a month or two at most.

Best of luck. If the cold turkey approach doesn't work, he could try gradual reduction. Or he could lock himself in a room and play World of Warcraft or something (ie a distraction) for a month until it's out of his system.

sardineta · 14-04-2009 11:11PM

You need to give him some tough love. Won't go, my hole! You need to kick his arse all the way down there because his frazzled mind won't see it's for his benefit.

LegacyUser · 14-04-2009 11:42PM

worried wife wrote: »

My husband smokes morning, noon and night.

The good news is that length of time of smoking need not add anymore to the difficulty of quitting and indeed may help enormously!! Your husband can no longer be under any illusions regarding smoking weed - guarenteed. Against the long list of negatives including:

- money worries
- relationship worries
- physical health worries
- mental worries
- paranoia
- ridicule (folks aren't fools, they all know and he knows they all know.)
- self-hatred/ lack of self respect
- enslavement: chasing around in fear when the supply dries up - willing to pay any price)
- lack of anything like enjoyment from smoking
- worry about the future: "will I be a 70 year old hash head?"

...he's got but one positive:

- hash suppresses the withdrawal symptoms caused by being a hash smoker.

Such symptoms can seem very powerful to the addicted mind but in reality terms they aren't a whole lot - once the mind has been re-aligned to think straight. Buy Allen Carrs "The Easy Way To Stop Smoking". It's a simple to read volume that costs about a tenner in Easons. It deals with the essence of nicotine addiction (which is the same essence that lies at addiction to other drugs: alcohol, food, cocaine, hash) and your husband (as a hash smoker) is likely to get entralled by the arguments presented.

There's a chance that the effect on him will be to quit smoking cigarettes (which is what happened to me although I still smoked hash - if by non-nicotine means of delivery) but there's a fighting chance that it will go on to do what it did for me - make me realise that hash was a similar trap to the nicotine one.

Commiserations (it can be no fun living with a hash addicted spouse), well done (in trying to help him out of it) and God bless..

Pete4779 · 15-04-2009 12:09AM

worried wife wrote: »

His doctor has prescribed him xanax, I just dont know if that will be enough.

Find another doctor.

Ann22 · 15-04-2009 12:29AM

sardineta wrote: »

You need to give him some tough love. Won't go, my hole! You need to kick his arse all the way down there because his frazzled mind won't see it's for his benefit.

It'd be great if it was that easy. How do you physically make a person do something they don't want to do?

smellslikeshoes · 15-04-2009 12:41AM

Ive known a few people in situations like this, the biggest culprit here is not the hash its the nicotine. You're husband has been smoking tobacco in the spliffs for 26 years and that is why his withdrawal symptoms are so bad.

I would approach this in the same way as someone who is giving up cigarettes after 26 years, patches/gum/inhalers etc.

PCPhoto · 15-04-2009 12:41AM

Ann22 wrote: »

It'd be great if it was that easy. How do you physically make a person do something they don't want to do?

tough love - involve the gardai !!!

Force him to own up to his addiction, he knows he's addicted - he knows he has a problem but is afraid and/or not committed to a full detox.

why not take a set amount of time - 6months/a year and slowly ween him off weed .... ie. take less and less each month/week

LegacyUser · 15-04-2009 08:29AM

Hi Op. I really feel for you, am in almost exactly the same situation. My partner has stopped smoking cigarettes but cannnot give up the hash. His moods become unbearable if he does and thats not on in a family situation. At least he does not spend 200 a week on it, more like 50, and he uses a pipe or bakes cookies. The cookies are much stronger than joints, but you wait up to an hour for them to have an effect. However I still dont see this as a solution and wish he could give up altogether. He also has a lot of issues from his past to deal with. I hope this works out for you and your husband, please let us know how you get on.

hot2def · 15-04-2009 09:31AM

cafecolour wrote: »

Finally, Xanax is a strong tranquilizer and anti-depressant. For most people, it should reduce the aggression, though for some, it could increase it. However, it's also addictive, more so then weed even.

+1

Minxie123 · 15-04-2009 09:31AM

Hi Worried Wife,

Just wanted to add that hash/weed is an emotion suppressant. If he had a tough time growing up he has been supressing all the feelings around that with hash and weed. Its likely that when he stops smoking that all those emotions and memories come to him like a ton of bricks. Which would probably account for the agression etc.

As a long long term full time hash smoker who quit over a year ago I can tell you that the withdrawls from hash itself is not that bad. Its more of a mind set than anything else. So I would say its the nicotine withdrawl plus the above mentioned emotional situation that are the root of the problem. As another poster said it would be a great idea to get the nicotine patches to take the edge off the nicotine withdrawls and also I can second the Alan Carr book. It really does help. The next step is counselling to deal with what happened to him as a kid growing up. This, I think, is the most important as until he deals with this he will always have the need to blot things out via hash/weed/alcohol etc

Best of luck with it all. He's lucky to have such a supportive partner. Its now time for the tough love mentioned by another poster. However I don't suggest for one second that you call the garda

but I do think you need to stop enabling him by buying his weed. That would be a good start.

LegacyUser · 15-04-2009 09:54AM

My wife has been smoking for 20 years. Smokes every day and a large quantity on any holiday or social event. Always seeking out people to smoke with. Turns into a dragon without it. Sometimes I am dying for her to have a smoke because I know it's the one thing that will calm her down. She must be addicted to nicotine at this stage. She is naturally high energy and productive but all the smoking is very debilitating and she hasn't achieved much in recent years. At weekends and holidays I am usually doing the housework and looking after the kids alone while she sleeps it off. I resent it.

I wish she could find another way to relax. Our friends seem to have either grown out of it at this stage or else just have the odd smoke once in a while. She is buying by the ounce and we can't afford it.

I have tried different ways to make her stop by being supportive, angry, begging everything. I have given up at this stage but the resentment is still there.

antiskeptic · 15-04-2009 10:51AM

smellslikeshoes wrote: »

Ive known a few people in situations like this, the biggest culprit here is not the hash its the nicotine. You're husband has been smoking tobacco in the spliffs for 26 years and that is why his withdrawal symptoms are so bad.

I would approach this in the same way as someone who is giving up cigarettes after 26 years, patches/gum/inhalers etc.

+1

After a good number of years off hash and cigarettes I found myself drifting back into it whilst living in Holland (of all places). I'd buy a ready-rolled number from the local coffee shop on occasion. Smoking half of it was enough to wipe me for the evening but it wasn't long before the compulsion started and I'd smoke the lot over the course of the evening - getting completely wasted as a result. At times I'd head back down to get a second one..

One day I dropped by the coffee shop to pick one up and saw the owner in the process of manufacturing the ready-rolled joints. He'd a little production line going with 30 or so cone-ready papers set out and a little mound of grass on each one. Onto each mound he was, to my horror, sprinkling about half the contents of a Marlboro cigarette.

"You use tobacco in those?!!" I asked. I'd been buying grass-filled joints instead of hash so as to avoid re-addicting myself to nicotine

"Why yesh of korse! Eat hulps to kip dee shpliff loiting!!" says he...

Rob_l · 15-04-2009 12:08PM

As a lot of people have said the main issue with quitting smoking weed/hash is the loss of the nicotine which is a really a massive dose in a joint( it being unfiltered).

When I have in the past quit smoking weed it was not the weed that caused the issue so long as i had cigarettes but I would smoke a lot more smokes just to get the nicotine fix.

One method for quitting the drug is to do it in stages
so quit the weed - but still smoke unfiltered joints but with no weed obviously. This will lessen the effects of the nicotine withdrawal while allowing him to get used to being sober.

The getting used to being sober is the main issue to deal with.

PeakOutput · 15-04-2009 12:24PM

ye as others have said its the nicotine there is no physical addiction to thc

mentally though as another poster pointed out that he hasnt dealt with the world as an adult without it in his system. so the best advice so far is for him to smoke just roll ups with no weed in it for a month or so and see how he deals with life without weed in his system i think you will be pleasantly suprised

then he is going to have try and get off the tobacco and that will be way harder but there is plenty of help out there for that already

obviously in the unlikely event we are all wrong and he is too far gone mentally addicted to weed then narcotics anonymous would be a good start

LegacyUser · 15-04-2009 01:39PM

Hi,

Please don't fall into the "it's all the nicotine" trap set above. Some people can't understand the nature of addiction. Some substances, e.g nicotine, have a physical withdrawal symptom. Others such as cannabis (and non-substance activities, such as gambling, sexual activity etc) are phsycologically addictive. Psychological addiction is oven overlooked but anyone who's worked with addiction will tell you they've seen many lives damaged by it.

I've given up cannabis at this stage - I still smoke tobacco and can assure you that continuing to smoke tobacco throughout the giving up process (or more accurately, numerous processes!) didn't make it one jolt easier.

I'd recommend filling the time that would've been spent stoned. Someone above suggested a game - this might sound juvenile but it's absolutely on the right lines. Your husband smokes cannabis because it's how he's always filled his free time, no matter what activities he's capable of performing while stoned, the fact is that the transition into a suddenly hyperactive yet idle mind for a stoner is a huge difference. He needs to engorge himself in some sort of activity, preferably something he can enjoy, that doesn't give him time to even think about smoking.

Make sure he's sleeping though, because a lack of sleep while trying to give up a whole lifestyle is unbearable.

LegacyUser · 15-04-2009 02:30PM

Thank you all so much for your replies. It is comforting to know I am not he only one in this situation. To be honest I think it is me who is not ready for his withdrawal, he is very determined that it is going to happen. Why would I involve the gaurds? He has been smoking for 26 years - do you really think in that length of time that he hasnt been caught once or twice with it. They know he is not dealing it and has serious problems with it so they leave him alone. I am going to be stocking up on cigarettes, chocolate and video games, hopefully they will take the edge off a bit. Thank you again for all the advice, it is reatly appreciated. I will let you know in about a month if he managed to do it. Fingers crossed.

allabouteve58 · 15-04-2009 04:57PM

My boyfriend also smokes a huge amount of weed/hash each day. However, recently he decided to give up cigarettes. But the thing is that he is smoking about 6 joints a day mixed with cigarettes!!! Actually he hasnt given them up at all!!! In fact he is smoking more hash as a result!!

I just wish he would cut down but I am the worst in the world if I mention it. I am just worried for him. His chest is in bits, his emotions are all over the shop and I just wish he would go to counselling to sort out all his worries/problems. But that is easy for me to say. I am not the one dealing with them.

He too had a bad childhood and it was really intersteing reading some of the posts here and it has given me a good insight into it!

Thanks for sharing!

Snowie · 15-04-2009 05:40PM

I recently gave up smoking weed/hash, well 9 months ago. I've cut out people who I've known, near all my life simply because they smoke it, so more or less losta lot of friends because there is always temptation, and i don't want to walk that path any more its unhealthy mentally, I smoked for 14 years and it was never easy, to give up I was going to counseling at the time with other issues, but it did make it easier to not need the escapism, that weed or hash brings..

All I can say is that it is hard, but his best bet is to cut all contacts with drugs of any sort including alcohol.

Other then that I wish him the best of luck.

if you have health insurance maybe through that you can get him to see a counselor ?

sanj2408 · 15-04-2009 10:55PM

I gave up drink, cigarettes and hash when I was pregnant, it was hard, I was very cranky, gave the other half hell but I did it!
I can tell you it was no harder than when I had previously tried to give up cigarettes. The addiction to hash is psychological, the addiction to the tobacco is physical. Both types of addictions are very difficult to overcome.
Really, Id advise he try to just give up the hash first and then when he's successfully done that, give up the cigarettes.
Its going to be hell for you but if he wants it badly enough it can be done.
Best of luck, i hope it goes ok for you.

Cannabis withdrawal after 26 years smoking

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