Stone & hard place

LegacyUser · 23-03-2009 10:07AM #1

Going unreg for this one, basically a young family member who is suffering from depression, now to be honest i think some of is playing up and getting what she wants and being a rebellious teenager. She has tried over medicating in the past but i think it was more a 2 finger salute to her mother when they had a row. Anyway it was tablets that didn't have an effect on her, still all the same it's worrying because if they had been stronger who knows.
She is on medication for the depression and is seeing a counsellor.
Anyway this is where I'm stuck in a hard place. She has a bebo page but her parents don' know she has one and i said i wouldn't tell them she had as she has been banned from the computer (they don't know that you can access it through a mobile)
Anyone familiar with bebo will know that you can write a saying for what your up to or how your feeling. This girl, mary lets say, wrote on her bebo page that "she was sick of her life and she just wanted to go away" and other comments. i spoke to her about it and asked her what's going on. She just said boyfriend trouble. She doesn't know that I know she has depression (confusing i know!). I've been keeping an eye on her comments from other people and 1 guy in particular is abusive, "I'll get revenge watch you back".
I know i should tell mary's parents BUT i did promise her I wouldn't tell them and I feel this way i can keep an eye on what's going on cause i know once they ban her from bebo she'll find another way of getting a page and this time she won't add me so i won't know what's going on. Also i think it'll just cause a big huge row and she'll throw a wobbly and might even try overdose again. But then if something bad happens I would have known and wouldn't have done anything and maybe could have prevented it. I got another family member who is the same age as her to speak to her as she speaks to him alot about this sort of stuff, he told me she was happy one minute on the phone then really angry the next.
I don't know why i'm really writing this as i know that everyone will tell me to tell the parents, but i just can't as i know when i was that age that being on msn (the bebo of that day) was good craic and very addictive and if anyone stopped me i would have been fair pis$ed off. I'm not good at confrontation either.
This probably doesn't make alot of sense as I'm just writing as i'm thinking, sorry for the long post.

Kevster · 25-03-2009 12:46AM

Hi,

I have had to deal with troubles myself in the past (and continue to do so), and I have also known people who have both tried to kill themselves and others who have succeeded in doing so. Firstly, her message saying that she wants to 'go away' is a cry for help, and it should not be ignored. It indicates that suicide is on her mind, but she may not have a definite plan to actually do anything. While saying this, you are right to be concerned about the comment from the other guy. Some people struggle to deal with pressure of this nature from others, and they seem to just let them abuse them constantly.

So, if you are on good speaking terms with this girl (your sister?), then I suggest letting it be known that you are always willing to help and understand her as much as you can. I would not mention that you've been looking at her Bebo page - or that you know about this other guy - but it may have to be done in the future if you notice that this guy's comments become worse.

... ....I wouldn't suggest telling your parents either, by the way. That would really piss your sister off and could be negative in the long term.

Kevin

Stone & hard place

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