Why can't I own a Canadian?

amadain17 · 24-10-2007 09:16PM #1

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It’s funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don’t agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan,
Jim

BrianCalgary · 24-10-2007 10:06PM

An American can not own a Canadian because we are already owned by our government.

And besides, the east Coast of teh USA does not have any snow or ice for the 4 months of the year needed by every Canadian for sheer survival purposes.

robindch · 24-10-2007 10:23PM

amadain17 wrote:

The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned...

...some years back. This letter has been doing the rounds for many years:

http://www.snopes.com/politics/religion/drlaura.asp

As it's been a while since some of these points have come up here, perhaps any christians could explain how these fairly clear moral guidelines are viewed these days?

Michael G · 24-10-2007 10:39PM

robindch wrote: »

As it's been a while since some of these points have come up here, perhaps any christians could explain how these fairly clear moral guidelines are viewed these days?

Well since you ask, many of these are fairly practical survival tips for a small beleaguered tribe — don't eat carrion or pork because experience shows that it makes you sick if it isn't cooked through, have sex only to procreate because there need to be more of us, etc. The others may have had some contemporary practical usefulness that escapes us. The Catholic, Anglican and Orthodox churches don't attach any significance to the detailed prescriptions. (You often hear Leviticus quoted to denounce homosexuality, for example, but not by Catholics or Orthodox who use far more complicated arguments based on the supreme value of human life as created in the image and likeness of God, and the significance of sex as God's instrument for creating life. Fundamentalists quote Leviticus. Anglicans don't like to talk about difficult subjects.)

mikemac · 25-10-2007 06:20AM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-zhNiGlogQ

Martin Sheen says it best of all

That letter has been around for years. Just goes to show what happens when you place too much importance on a passage of text, possibly like the jehovah witnessess

mismi · 25-10-2007 11:55AM

Michael G wrote: »

Well since you ask, many of these are fairly practical survival tips for a small beleaguered tribe — don't eat carrion or pork because experience shows that it makes you sick if it isn't cooked through, have sex only to procreate because there need to be more of us, etc. The others may have had some contemporary practical usefulness that escapes us. The Catholic, Anglican and Orthodox churches don't attach any significance to the detailed prescriptions. (You often hear Leviticus quoted to denounce homosexuality, for example, but not by Catholics or Orthodox who use far more complicated arguments based on the supreme value of human life as created in the image and likeness of God, and the significance of sex as God's instrument for creating life. Fundamentalists quote Leviticus. Anglicans don't like to talk about difficult subjects.)

Must agree...Old Testament is there to give a basis and a foundation for the New Testament. It's a history of God and his faithfulness to his people. He never gave up on them no matter how they disobeyed. Circumstances change - we are no longer bound by works but are freed by grace...sin is still sin and it is to be avoided at all costs:
Mark 9:47
And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. It is better for you to enter the kingdom of God with one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into hell,
in other words do your best to live a pure and blameless life before the Lord but know that if you are a believer that you are covered by grace and that your sin has already been forgiven.
The fact is that the things listed in the letter are Old Testament Guidelines. Most of those things have to do with the practice of religion and as Michael G. stated above practical survival tips for the Tribe - but these things passed with time because they were no longer needed. The fact is that homosexuality is a sin, just as fornication, adultery, gluttony, etc....these things can be resisted. And we are better because of resisting them. That fact was never negated by the New Testament.

PDN · 25-10-2007 04:00PM

We have discussed in this forum before how Christians interpret Old Testament texts. Anyone who is opposed to homosexuality purely on the grounds of a verse in Leviticus is an ass.

Dr Laura is a Jew, not a Christian, and so will approach Leviticus differently from Christians. I appreciate that there is no Jewish forum on boards.ie, but why is this thread in the Christianity forum?

amadain17 · 25-10-2007 04:11PM

Its on the christian forum because fundamentist christians use old testament chapher and verses to peddle their evil

PDN · 25-10-2007 04:26PM

amadain17 wrote: »

Its on the christian forum because fundamentist christians use old testament chapher and verses to peddle their evil

I know thousands of fundamentalist Christians and I have never met one who based their opposition to homosexuality just on a passage from Leviticus (although there may well be a particularly uneducated example somewhere in Alabama or Mississippi that does so - anything is possible, I suppose).

I think you're just trolling.

Zombrex · 25-10-2007 04:36PM

PDN wrote: »

I know thousands of fundamentalist Christians and I have never met one who based their opposition to homosexuality just on a passage from Leviticus (although there may well be a particularly uneducated example somewhere in Alabama or Mississippi that does so - anything is possible, I suppose).

Ok, what is the correct verse to think homosexuality is an abomination to God?

BrianCalgary · 25-10-2007 04:37PM

And here I thought that this would be a humourous respite on the benefits or consequences of owning on of my country men or women. But since it hasn't gone that way I think I'll lock the thread as the article is rather aged.

Why can't I own a Canadian?

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