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Inappropriate text from solicitor - advice please

  • 04-09-2019 12:53PM
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭


    Hi All,

    Posting this situation that a friend is going through as I'm unsure how best to advise her.

    Long story short, my friend was in an accident 4.5yrs ago. She was a passenger in a car, travelling with a colleague and on duty at the time. They were in a very bad car accident, very obviously caused by the other driver.

    Since this accident, she can no longer work in the field that she has her degree and training in due to physical restrictions as a direct result of crash - her GP/specialists will not sign her back on as fit for aspects of the physical work required for her particular job.

    She waited 4.5 yrs for this case to be brought to court and basically gone through hell while waiting for a court date to be finally set which is due in October. Her solicitor has been preparing her for the court date and has held meetings with her alone and after hours for this at times.

    Then.... he drunk text her last Monday night. Advising her that he was separated, knows he shouldn't be texting her etc. etc. She didn't respond that evening and hoped that there would be a mortified apology waiting for her in the morning.... there wasn't. So she text him and said he had put her in a very uncomfortable situation, especially given the stress of the upcoming court appearance and that he had been highly inappropriate in his behavior. He apologised, admitted it was inappropriate and said he was ashamed of himself.

    She now feels, and rightly so imo, that she cannot continue to have meetings with him alone and may need to change representation. My worry with this is that it will set her back in her court case which she has waited and stressed over for 4.5yrs if she changes representation now.

    What should she do here? Will changing representation set her back? Can she change to a different solicitor within the same practice without it affecting her case? Should she report him?

    Any advice/input greatly appreciated.


«13

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,679 ✭✭✭✭Samuel T. Cogley


    Over reaction imho. He's apologised and just see him in office hours if she's that uncomfortable.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,060 ✭✭✭✭lawred2


    Over reaction imho. He's apologised and just see him in office hours if she's that uncomfortable.

    hmmmm

    an over reaction?

    not so sure about that - of course she's going to feel uncomfortable around him... so what if he apologised! He only did so after being forced into doing so.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,939 ✭✭✭✭banie01


    I agree with Sam, the circumstances of your friends case, her infirmity and her ongoing inability to work in her chosen field don't really have a lot to do with the meat of the matter.

    There may simply have been a case of crossed wires.
    The solicitor may have thought over the course of their professional relationship that there may have been potential for something more.
    The solicitor sent a message, it wasn't well received and he has apologised for it.

    Up until that point, has your friend been happy with how they have handled the case?

    Your friend can certainly choose to change her solicitor, but costs accrued would need to be settled with the original solicitor before the case files are passed to the new solicitor.

    If your friend is happy with the performance of the solicitor to date apart from the SMS, I'd ask if the upheaval is worth the hassle?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭Megwepz


    banie01 wrote: »
    the circumstances of your friends case, her infirmity and her ongoing inability to work in her chosen field don't really have a lot to do with the meat of the matter.

    I suppose the reason I gave the few details about the case was to show how serious this case has been for her and how important the outcome of the court case will be to her. Her solicitor knows all of these details and should have known better than to do something that could potentially jeopardize her case???

    I mean, if he really wanted to ask her out, why didn't he work his socks off and knock her case out of the park and then wait til it's closed to ask her?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,767 ✭✭✭nuac


    Mod
    A PI action can lead to a close working relationship between plaintiff and solicitor. Such litigation can be stressful for the plaintiff.
    Likewise a separation can be stressful. In time the stress reduces.
    I don't want to sound like Angela McNamara of old but your solicitor figures he knows your friend well enough to discuss the break-up with her, leading to this situation.
    Suggest your friend recommend he see another solicitor re issues arising from the separation. Suggest meetings re the PI action be in the office at suitable times

    Leaving open for general legal discussion


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,104 ✭✭✭boombang


    I would contact the regulatory body for solicitors (Law Society of Ireland?) and seek clarification on would it set her hearing back. Highly unprofessional from your man and her situation should not be compromised by his poor judgement.

    If you're in position of professional responsibility like that you should not be sending out drunk texts. Sorry if that's harsh.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 861 ✭✭✭tomwaits48


    he's apologised, move on and get back to business.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 1,121 ✭✭✭secondrowgal


    Not an overreaction at all! If that were me, I would absolutely want a new solicitor. The additional stress is just not worth it. And if she doesn't feel comfortable in his presence, then that's enough reason to change. If there is one in the same practise, then that would probably be ideal because he/she can be briefed and brought up to speed. It's up to herself whether she wants to report him, but the lack of an apology without prompting would put him in a bad light for me.

    Any time lost, any additional costs as a result of the change should also be borne by the solicitor/practise. It is not your friend's fault that she had to change solicitor.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭Megwepz


    nuac wrote: »
    Mod
    A PI action can lead to a close working relationship between plaintiff and solicitor. Such litigation can be stressful for the plaintiff.
    Likewise a separation can be stressful. In time the stress reduces.
    I don't want to sound like Angela McNamara of old but your solicitor figures he knows your friend well enough to discuss the break-up with her, leading to this situation.
    Suggest your friend recommend he see another solicitor re issues arising from the separation. Suggest meetings re the PI action be in the office at suitable times

    Leaving open for general legal discussion

    It's not that he was merely mentioning/discussing his separation with my friend in what he viewed as a friendly conversation or looking for advice on the matter, they have not developed a personal/friendly relationship.... he made a pass at her via text, late at night, and presumably inebriated.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 687 ✭✭✭Portsalon


    Megwepz wrote: »

    Her solicitor has been preparing her for the court date and has held meetings with her alone and after hours for this at times.

    Had they a good working relationship prior to this incident?

    Is she 100% certain that at no stage would she have said or done anything that might have led him to misunderstand their [solicitor: client] relationship?


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  • Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 2,175 ✭✭✭ToBeFrank123


    He's apologised. I'd give him another chance. If he does something similar in future, inform his superiors or something like that.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭Megwepz


    Portsalon wrote: »
    Had they a good working relationship prior to this incident?

    Is she 100% certain that at no stage would she have said or done anything that might have led him to misunderstand their [solicitor: client] relationship?

    Genuinely I don't think so. I know this woman inside out and how she operates and behaves. She is not the type of woman to send out signals like that naturally and she certainly was not interested in him.

    She was in a long term relationship until very recently. Last Friday, her solicitor informed her that it was likely the defense have a PI following her taking photos etc. and she said that she was worried about this as she had to move house recently as a result of her break up and was afraid the PI may have been taking photos of the move etc. So he obviously noted that she was now single and took his opportunity to hit on her.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,448 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    Seems like they both need a night out, maybe going for dinner might not be the worst thing in the world even if it's just a professional date. Would help clear the air. Shes a long way down the road to be jumping ship just because someone fancies her.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,519 ✭✭✭✭punisher5112


    The friend could always change solicitor or ask for another to take over the case.

    Obviously he went the wrong way but maybe he honestly likes the friend and it's the only way he could strike up the courage to ask.

    He didn't threaten or anything else bad as such but it would be seen as unprofessional.

    I wouldn't be looking for to destroy them especially if they're a good solicitor.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭Megwepz


    Seems like they both need a night out, maybe going for dinner might not be the worst thing in the world even if it's just a professional date. Would help clear the air. Shes a long way down the road to be jumping ship just because someone fancies her.

    I'm so sorry... but this is just ridiculous 'advice'. A 'professional dinner date' with the man that has made her uncomfortable and even more stressed about her upcoming case - what would that achieve exactly??? Except for maybe giving him some sort of inkling that she did did have feelings for him (which she does not) or that his behavior was acceptable?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,417 ✭✭✭antix80


    I think your friend should chill a bit. Keep it in perspective. He's her solicitor, not her gynaecologist. Instead of meeting in his office a phone-call might be more appropriate. If they need to meet, do it during business hours.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 2,653 ✭✭✭XsApollo


    It’s only inappropriate because she has no interest in him, if the opposite was true and she was interested then there wouldn’t be an issue I assume.
    Let it lie, if he continues then yes it’s a problem.


  • Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 2,175 ✭✭✭ToBeFrank123


    Megwepz wrote: »
    I'm so sorry... but this is just ridiculous 'advice'. A 'professional dinner date' with the man that has made her uncomfortable and even more stressed about her upcoming case - what would that achieve exactly??? Except for maybe giving him some sort of inkling that she did did have feelings for him (which she does not) or that his behavior was acceptable?

    Sounds like she is over-reacting. Both of them need to put it behind them and move on.

    It was a drunken text asking her out. It happens. People make mistakes when drunk all the time.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭Megwepz


    The friend could always change solicitor or ask for another to take over the case.

    Obviously he went the wrong way but maybe he honestly likes the friend and it's the only way he could strike up the courage to ask.

    He didn't threaten or anything else bad as such but it would be seen as unprofessional.

    I wouldn't be looking for to destroy them especially if they're a good solicitor.

    And she is definitely not looking to destroy him by any means.... all this poor woman wants is the stress of the court case gone. He definitely didn't threaten but his behaviour was inappropriate given the pending court case... surely there is some rule of ethics that would not allow him date a current client even if he wanted to?

    She is going to feel uncomfortable alone in his company from now on which is an added stress she just doesn't need. I'd fear that he will drop the ball on her case following this rejection and it will ultimately affect her outcome.

    I also fear that if she changes her representation this will negatively impact her also at this stage in the case. He has really just caused unnecessary worry for her and I'm a bit lost as to how to advise her to proceed.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,872 ✭✭✭Sittingpretty


    Very stupid and unprofessional of him to drunk text a client.

    However if your friend is happy to date with the services he's providing she should accept the apology and move on and get stuck back into her case. If she's uncomfortable meeting him in person then business can be conducted via phone or e-mail or during office hour.

    Were it to happen again, it becomes a problem but for now I'd treat it as a massively error in judgement and a mistake on his part.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,029 ✭✭✭SusieBlue


    October is merely weeks away. Is it worth jeapordising the case if the changeover to a new solicitor causes her to lose?

    I'm not defending him but a bit of perspective is needed here. What he did was wrong and inappropriate. He has apologised.
    For the sake of the court case she should put it behind her and just get on with it for the sake of a few weeks. Soon enough she won't need to be in contact with him again.
    The man is probably mortified and will be extremely professional going forward, for fear of overstepping the mark.

    What's more important, the court case or proving a point over what appears to be a genuine error of judgment?


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Education Moderators, Paid Member Posts: 27,458 CMod ✭✭✭✭spurious


    I wouldn't feel comfortable working with him. I can understand your friend's misgivings.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,519 ✭✭✭✭punisher5112


    Megwepz wrote: »
    And she is definitely not looking to destroy him by any means.... all this poor woman wants is the stress of the court case gone. He definitely didn't threaten but his behaviour was inappropriate given the pending court case... surely there is some rule of ethics that would not allow him date a current client even if he wanted to?

    She is going to feel uncomfortable alone in his company from now on which is an added stress she just doesn't need. I'd fear that he will drop the ball on her case following this rejection and it will ultimately affect her outcome.

    I also fear that if she changes her representation this will negatively impact her also at this stage in the case. He has really just caused unnecessary worry for her and I'm a bit lost as to how to advise her to proceed.

    Fully appreciate it, it may well be best brush it off and be flattered for the attention...

    Well I would be if it were a girl chasing me.

    Has happened couple of times in work but I was already taken.

    I get she is stressed out and of course wrong timing but then again he may well like her and as I said he may have text before thinking.

    Most likely why he never replied, I would say he was mortified.


  • Posts: 3,686 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I remember when I was going through my divorce and was using a highly recommended Dublin solicitor because my ex husband had some heavy guns on his side, the partner in the Solicitors practice who was my Solicitor made a pass at me, took my hand, admired my hands and my nail polish (!!) and I was absolutely mortified. While it kinda threw me a bit, I did nothing about it at all. I hadn't the stomach to go to a new solicitor and start from scratch. Divorce went through fine , Solicitor did a very good job, end of story.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 21,344 ✭✭✭✭Stark


    Hard to really know without knowing what kind of a person he is.

    No doubt your friend is aware that there are quite a few creeps out there who react badly to rejection and make life very uncomfortable with pestering and the like and is nervous about where things might go as a result. With any luck though, he's probably one of the majority of men who would feel embarrassed after putting himself out and being rejected and probably wants to forget the whole thing as much as your friend. In which case, they can both continue on and pretend as if nothing happens.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 886 ✭✭✭randomchild


    I saw it raised only once before in passing in this thread so I will make the point again, if your friend has an issue with this behavior contact the Law Society of Ireland, the regulatory body for solicitors.

    While the person's behavior can be understood and sympathized with, it is still a significant breach of the duty a solicitor owes to any client, which is very onerous, and completely inappropriate. It is unlikely to lead to serious consequences but you never know, this may not be an isolated incident and the Law Society may have more information to demonstrate a pattern of behavior.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,060 ✭✭✭✭lawred2


    can't believe the amount of "sure get over it - no big deal" posts..

    he wasn't a friend who got a bit carried away with himself - it was her solicitor with whom she thought she had a strictly professional relationship..


  • Posts: 3,686 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I saw it raised only once before in passing in this thread so I will make the point again, if your friend has an issue with this behavior contact the Law Society of Ireland, the regulatory body for solicitors.

    While the person's behavior can be understood and sympathized with, it is still a significant breach of the duty a solicitor owes to any client, which is very onerous, and completely inappropriate. It is unlikely to lead to serious consequences but you never know, this may not be an isolated incident and the Law Society may have more information to demonstrate a pattern of behavior.

    I think I would wait until after her court case for that.
    Imagine raising it with the Law Society now and her solicitor is investigated (for what....asking her out when he was drunk?) that will surely sour the working relationship and made things very difficult. I'd forget it, move ahead with the case, pay the Solicitor and move on with life.
    If she wants to make a point, a complaint, an investigation then leave it till afterwards.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 74 ✭✭Megwepz


    lawred2 wrote: »
    can't believe the amount of "sure get over it - no big deal" posts..

    he wasn't a friend who got a bit carried away with himself - it was her solicitor with whom she thought she had a strictly professional relationship..

    See, I'm in your camp to be honest, think it's totally out unprofessional (and surely a breach of whatever rules solicitors are supposed to adhere to?) but I do also recognise that if she changes lawyers/reports him etc. etc. it may have more negative ramifications for her than it might do for him. Not the right reason for me to advise her to 'just get over it' but should it be a consideration?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 78,904 ✭✭✭✭Victor


    banie01 wrote: »
    The solicitor may have thought over the course of their professional relationship that there may have been potential for something more.
    The after the case is settled, the solicitor could invite her to lunch.


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