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How is a man supposed to find a woman in the 21st century

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Comments

  • #722
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    anewme wrote: »
    No every woman wouldn't.

    Some would, some wouldn't.

    For me, the best welcome in the world comes from 4 furry paws and a waggy tail.

    How old are you?


  • #723
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    I'm not talking about people who can't have kids. Obviously that's a totally different situation.

    I'm also not saying having kids means you need to become a housewife.

    I'm talking about the women who think they don't want to have kids, and think their career is a good substitute.

    I have never met a woman who didn't regret it when she got older.

    Sure it's fine when you're 33 and enjoying single life, but when you're 60 and coming home to an empty home? That's a mistake.

    Wouldn't every woman rather their kid runs up to her, "welcome home mommy, I love you", instead of being old in an empty home?

    I've worked with women who have regretted having children, these women are older now with adult kids so it's not the ranting of a tired woman juggling a newborn. My own mother never wanted children and chooses not to be part of their lives despite now being elderly and alone. Not every woman will have a happy experience, some children are hard for even a parent to love. No one talks about it because of the stigma but there are many parents out there who would rather they never had kids

    Open your mind a bit.


  • #724
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    Btw I understand there are childless women will defend their decision to the death. They have to, of course. The alternative is pretty painful...

    Obviously I know there are some women who really don't want to have children. But they're rare. We know this because most women have children.


  • #725
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    eviltwin wrote: »
    I've worked with women who have regretted having children, these women are older now with adult kids so it's not the ranting of a tired woman juggling a newborn. My own mother never wanted children and chooses not to be part of their lives despite now being elderly and alone. Not every woman will have a happy experience, some children are hard for even a parent to love. No one talks about it because of the stigma but there are many parents out there who would rather they never had kids

    Open your mind a bit.

    You say this like it's common though...

    And define regret.

    You're saying she really would rather go back in time and have an abortion? Of course not.

    Everything is a sacrifice, and having children will always give you some regrets.


  • #726
    Wanderer2010
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,743 ✭✭✭Wanderer2010


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    Btw I understand there are childless women will defend their decision to the death. They have to, of course. The alternative is pretty painful...

    Obviously I know there are some women who really don't want to have children. But they're rare. We know this because most women have children.

    Ha ha I thought you were a serious poster at first but your "opinions" are clearly just to get a reaction. I suspected it when you said that mind games don't exist in the workplace a while back but your last few posts have confirmed you are a wind-up merchant. Most women do this, most men do that etc.

    Not hard to see the enormous flaws in your statements. :D:D:D


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  • #727
    anewme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,160 ✭✭✭✭anewme


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    How old are you?

    Old enough to know what I want and know that I love my life and will have no regrets.


  • #728
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    anewme wrote: »
    Old enough to know what I want and know that I love my life and will have no regrets.

    Can you at least admit you're very much in the minority?


  • #729
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    You say this like it's common though...

    And define regret.

    You're saying she really would rather go back in time and have an abortion? Of course not.

    Everything is a sacrifice, and having children will always give you some regrets.

    I'm not saying it's common, I'm saying it's more common than people realise


  • #730
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    eviltwin wrote: »
    I'm not saying it's common, I'm saying it's more common than people realise

    I can accept that.


  • #731
    anewme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,160 ✭✭✭✭anewme


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    Can you at least admit you're very much in the minority?

    Out of all of the people I know, I'm the happiest, least stressed. I xcome and go and account to no one.

    Many of my friends regret having children, not regret them now they are here, but wish their lives were different and that they could have had their own lives and if they had it again might do it differently and might not have had children.


    A large number are separating and some are living in the same home, but living apart as finances keep them there. Not working for years means no independence. But would love to leave.


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  • #732
    El_Duderino 09
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,391 ✭✭✭✭El_Duderino 09


    Nikki Sixx wrote: »
    Not saying that but it just means you need two salaries now to pay a mortgage and both parents in full time employment. Just saying that it’s two steps forward one step back. What have women really gained from working full time? Now they can’t be with their kids, they work full time and have to pay a child-minder on top of it.

    The women can't be with their kids? What about the men who can't be with their kids.

    To answer your question, they gained the freedom to have jobs and careers. Capitalism in its infinite wisdom, is able to pay people too little to buy a house and resists attempts to raise wages.

    I'll never forget watching Bill o reily fox news one day. He was glorifying the good ole days when his grandfather was a janitor in a hospital for his whole life. He had a wife and family and a house which was all paid for by the one janitor job. Obviously he spoke well of his grandfather.

    Bill would rant about how terrible social welfare is and how people in welfare are "takers". But if his grandfather were a janitor today he would be completely dependant on social welfare for housing and living day to day. Owning a House and having a family would be out of the question. But he would also rave against any efforts to raise wages or trade unions collective bargaining for the poor.


  • #733
    Thelonious Monk
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,090 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    I think there are far more people who had kids so that someone would love them and that the kid would be the answer to all their existential issues and perhaps even what their failing relationship needs than miserable people alone with no children. People I know who decided not to have kids are the most interesting people I know who enjoy life too much to ever have had time for kids or wanted them.


  • #734
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    anewme wrote: »
    Out of all of the people I know, I'm the happiest, least stressed. I xcome and go and account to no one.

    Many of my friends regret having children, not regret them now they are here, but wish their lives were different and that they could have had their own lives and if they had it again might do it differently and might not have had children.

    A large number are separating and some are living in the same home, but living apart as finances keep them there. Not working for years means no independence. But would love to leave.

    I feel you're not being completely honest here. But it's OK. Let's leave it there.


  • #735
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    I feel you're not being completely honest here. But it's OK. Let's leave it there.

    I have a feeling you have issues with most things women say unless it ties in with your world view


  • #736
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 11,195 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    the c suite exec legend graces another thread with their magnificence.

    made any woman the happiest in the world yet?


  • #737
    B0jangles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,950 ✭✭✭B0jangles


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    Can you at least admit you're very much in the minority?


    She's really not.

    I don't have kids, I never wanted to have kids, I'd much rather have a dog :)

    I kept wondering if the 'broodiness' that's supposed to totally consume every women once she hits her thirties would change how I felt, but I've still no interest whatsoever in having children.

    In any case it's a bit difficult for parents to actually tell anyone that they regret having their children - what if the kids find out?


  • #738
    ancapailldorcha
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 43,412 CMod ✭✭✭✭ancapailldorcha


    I know several women who don't want kids. They're well rounded and intelligent people. Not everyone needs a kid to be happy. Many people shouldn't have them at all IMO.

    The foreigner residing among you must be treated as your native-born. Love them as yourself, for you were foreigners in Egypt. I am the LORD your God.

    Leviticus 19:34



  • #739
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    eviltwin wrote: »
    I have a feeling you have issues with most things women say unless it ties in with your world view

    My world view is people should do whatever they want.

    But many people make bad decisions.

    This isn't a sexism thing.


  • #740
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    My world view is people should do whatever they want.

    But many people make bad decisions.

    This isn't a sexism thing.

    Who are you to say what a bad decision is?


  • #741
    Wanderer2010
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,743 ✭✭✭Wanderer2010


    eviltwin wrote: »
    I have a feeling you have issues with most things women say unless it ties in with your world view

    That's his/her "thing" though, look at his past posts about workplaces and meeting new people, which I think is in this very thread. The amount of absolute drivel and flamebait is way too out of whack to be real. The worst thing you can do is feed it.


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  • #742
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    Deleted User wrote: »
    the c suite exec legend graces another thread with their magnificence.

    made any woman the happiest in the world yet?

    You're so upset I'm successful you have to bring it up whenever you see my posts.

    Imagine having that level of begrudgery and not being able to let it go.

    Are you ok?


  • #743
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    B0jangles wrote: »
    She's really not.

    I don't have kids, I never wanted to have kids, I'd much rather have a dog :)

    I kept wondering if the 'broodiness' that's supposed to totally consume every women once she hits her thirties would change how I felt, but I've still no interest whatsoever in having children.

    In any case it's a bit difficult for parents to actually tell anyone that they regret having their children - what if the kids find out?

    I can absolutely accept she's not the minority on boards.

    This website does not reflect the "average" person.

    I think you can admit that.

    But you really can't agree the majority of women want to have children?


  • #744
    anewme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,160 ✭✭✭✭anewme


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    I feel you're not being completely honest here. But it's OK. Let's leave it there.

    I couldn’t give a monkey’s uncle whether you believe me or not.


  • #745
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Who are you to say what a bad decision is?

    It's called having an opinion.

    We are allowed have opinions here, right?

    And we're allowed have different opinions...


  • #746
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 11,195 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    You're so upset I'm successful you have to bring it up whenever you see my posts.

    Imagine having that level of begrudgery and not being able to let it go.

    Are you ok?

    ey buddy you're paying my wages, i wouldnt hear a word against ya


  • #747
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    anewme wrote: »
    I couldn’t give a monkey’s uncle whether you believe me or not.

    Sure. And you're right. Too many people take this website way too seriously.


  • #748
    B0jangles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,950 ✭✭✭B0jangles


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    I can absolutely accept she's not the minority on boards.

    This website does not reflect the "average" person.

    I think you can admit that.

    But you really can't agree the majority of women want to have children?

    No, unless the majority of women been polled on the subject, I cannot agree that the majority of women want to have children. Maybe they do, maybe they don't. Until fairly recently, they didn't have a huge amount of choice in the matter in this country.

    You are entitled to your opinions of course, but you need to accept that they are only opinions and are no more valid than those of any other person. Unless you have some third party data to back them up that is.


  • #749
    eviltwin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    OMM 0000 wrote: »
    It's called having an opinion.

    We are allowed have opinions here, right?

    And we're allowed have different opinions...

    Not sure that makes sense. If a woman tells you she's happy with her life and doesn't regret not having children who are you to tell her it was a bad decision?


  • #750
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    Wanderer2010 wrote: »
    That's his/her "thing" though, look at his past posts about workplaces and meeting new people, which I think is in this very thread. The amount of absolute drivel and flamebait is way too out of whack to be real. The worst thing you can do is feed it.

    You have me confused with someone else.

    I'm very much a believer in people doing whatever they want.

    If a woman wants to give up her life and spend 70 hours a week working, networking and planning, all for her career, and she makes loads of money, sure, go for it, but I think that's a mistake. Same if a man does it.


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  • #751
    OMM 0000
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,733 ✭✭✭OMM 0000


    B0jangles wrote: »
    No, unless the majority of women been polled on the subject, I cannot agree that the majority of women want to have children. Maybe they do, maybe they don't. Until fairly recently, they didn't have a huge amount of choice in the matter in this country.

    You are entitled to your opinions of course, but you need to accept that they are only opinions and are no more valid than those of any other person. Unless you have some third party data to back them up that is.

    Hang on. You're not being reasonable.

    Let's try to compromise. Can you at least admit the majority of women have children?


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