How to kill an Ex...

Carry · 24-07-2018 11:56PM

JJayoo wrote: »

Record him threatening you, put it on the internet, let social media spread it

That's what I'm starting to do

He plays dirty, I play dirtier. I'm so fed up of him thinking I'm a doormat.

Filmer Paradise · 24-07-2018 11:57PM

Carry wrote: »

...and get away with it.

I don’t want to go into details about a toxic relationship that ended more than 15 years ago, longer actually – for a good reason.

And I don’t want to go into detail why he turned up today (from abroad where he lives) and started threatening me with all sorts of things without being physically abusive. Well, that was his trick all along in the past. And the reason why I ended up in Ireland as far away from him as possible. As the saying goes: long story.

A solicitor is involved by now, so that side is covered. And the reason why I wouldn’t go into details.

But thing is, I’m so upset that I thought some AH input would cheer me up, even after actual talks with friends and neighbours.

I feel murderous (which my solictor doesn’t approve, naturally).

So any ideas how to fuel my fantasies about how to kill an 6’6’’ Ex who openly declared today that he doesn’t give a shìt about me as long as he gets his way?

The crueller the better. Thanks.

You need a bigger boyfriend....

Donald Trump · 25-07-2018 12:01AM

Deleted User wrote: »

dress him up as a hutch

You mean stick a rabbit up their bum?

(Rampant rabbit maybe)

biko · 25-07-2018 12:01AM

That you, Mary?

Carry · 25-07-2018 12:05AM

Filmer Paradise wrote: »

You need a bigger boyfriend....

Yeah, find one in Ireland ...:rolleyes:

I need a bigger me (5'5'')

But I'm just happy to get bigger support in the funny and happily silly AH way, so I can go to bed with a chuckle and not with fear.

Carry · 25-07-2018 12:05AM

biko wrote: »

That you, Mary?

Nope.

Charlie19 · 25-07-2018 12:08AM

An episode of Love Island should do the trick.

c.p.w.g.w · 25-07-2018 12:09AM

Carry wrote: »

Easily confused with wild garlic, isnt it? :D

But sadly no lily of the valley around here.

Apparently it has been sold in garden centers every now and then

degsie · 25-07-2018 12:10AM

Turn him into a cat and then make him curious.

Filmer Paradise · 25-07-2018 12:11AM

Carry wrote: »

Yeah, find one in Ireland ...:rolleyes:

I need a bigger me (5'5'')

But I'm just happy to get bigger support in the funny and happily silly AH way, so I can go to bed with a chuckle and not with fear.

No prob. I work with a guy called Six-Eight. Eastern European chap.

Does bouncer on the side, etc

Carry · 25-07-2018 12:16AM

vectorvictor wrote: »

"I feel murderous" is not a fantasy related statement nor did you reference fantasy at any stage. People are impacted by these things and I see no humour in your pathetic attempt at attention.

You are the life and soul of any party, aren't you?

Gadgetman496 · 25-07-2018 12:38AM

Carry wrote: »

...and get away with it.

I don’t want to go into details about a toxic relationship that ended more than 15 years ago, longer actually – for a good reason.

And I don’t want to go into detail why he turned up today (from abroad where he lives) and started threatening me with all sorts of things without being physically abusive. Well, that was his trick all along in the past. And the reason why I ended up in Ireland as far away from him as possible. As the saying goes: long story.

A solicitor is involved by now, so that side is covered. And the reason why I wouldn’t go into details.

But thing is, I’m so upset that I thought some AH input would cheer me up, even after actual talks with friends and neighbours.

I feel murderous (which my solictor doesn’t approve, naturally).

So any ideas how to fuel my fantasies about how to kill an 6’6’’ Ex who openly declared today that he doesn’t give a shìt about me as long as he gets his way?

The crueller the better. Thanks.

vectorvictor wrote: »

"I feel murderous" is not a fantasy related statement nor did you reference fantasy at any stage. People are impacted by these things and I see no humour in your pathetic attempt at attention.

???

Yakult · 25-07-2018 12:48AM

Lock said person in a room with Westlife on loop, full blast for 7 days.

Around day 3, you should see some great results.

Donald Trump · 25-07-2018 01:12AM

Yakult wrote: »

Lock said person in a room with Westlife on loop, full blast for 7 days.

Around day 3, you should see some great results.

For even better results, lock them in a room with Westlife.

Solve a few problems at once

TightyWhiteys · 25-07-2018 01:17AM

Yakult wrote: »

Lock said person in a room with Westlife on loop, full blast for 7 days.

Around day 3, you should see some great results.

Believe it or not, Westlife songs are actually used in torture

Are Am Eye · 25-07-2018 01:22AM

c.p.w.g.w wrote: »

Lily of the Valley

Carry wrote: »

Easily confused with wild garlic, isnt it? :D

But sadly no lily of the valley around here.

c.p.w.g.w wrote: »

Apparently it has been sold in garden centers every now and then

You might be able to find some in the valley.

johnayo · 25-07-2018 01:25AM

Filmer Paradise wrote: »

No prob. I work with a guy called Six-Eight. Eastern European chap.

Does bouncer on the side, etc

Poor girl would probably have to give six-eight the ride afterwards and he hung like a horse. She wouldn't be able to walk properly for a week.

johnayo · 25-07-2018 01:27AM

I say just give him a smack of a shovel on the back of the head. Job done.

PlaneSpeeking · 25-07-2018 01:43AM

johnayo wrote: »

I say just give him a smack of a shovel on the back of the head. Job done.

Old school. None of your new fangled Novichok nonsense, good old Irish shovel !!!

Carry · 25-07-2018 01:47AM

johnayo wrote: »

I say just give him a smack of a shovel on the back of the head. Job done.

Easy.
Well, not really, but manageable somehow, if pushed.

But how to dispose the body and the evidence for good?
(there are wilderness bogs in my neck of the woods, though transport may be a problem).

I might go back to Mr Six-Eight, as proposed by Mr filmer paradise.

The problem though is the trail back to me, knowing the eejity of local killers.

But then, there is the eejity of local gardai...

Muff_Daddy · 25-07-2018 01:52AM

It’s a pity Catherine Nevin popped her clogs earlier this year.....she’d have been a wealth of information for you OP

johnayo · 25-07-2018 10:02AM

Carry wrote: »

Easy.
Well, not really, but manageable somehow, if pushed.

But how to dispose the body and the evidence for good?
(there are wilderness bogs in my neck of the woods, though transport may be a problem).

I might go back to Mr Six-Eight, as proposed by Mr filmer paradise.

The problem though is the trail back to me, knowing the eejity of local killers.

But then, there is the eejity of local gardai...

The body disposal is tricky alright, but at least with the shovel, you will have the tools for the job at hand.:pac:

degsie · 25-07-2018 06:12PM

johnayo wrote: »

I say just give him a smack of a shovel on the back of the head. Job done.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iS6chrslAfo

RiderOnTheStorm · 25-07-2018 06:45PM

Poison is traditionally the weapon of the fairer sex.

To get away with it:
Nicotine - very toxic, hard to detect afterwards, and given in liquid form (ie flavoured vape liquid) hard for ex to detect in his drink.

For painful results:
Rat poison - cant be reversed and ex dies slowly from massive internal bleeding and organ failure. But its hard to get him to eat it, and its obvious what has happened when effects start.

All hypothetical, of course....

indioblack · 25-07-2018 07:13PM

pleas advice wrote: »

Novichok

That's in poor taste, as someone has actually died from this substance.

arybvtcw0eolkf · 25-07-2018 07:14PM

johnayo wrote: »

The body disposal is tricky alright, but at least with the shovel, you will have the tools for the job at hand.:pac:

A wood chipper, then spray his tiny body parts into a fast flowing river. Job done.

arybvtcw0eolkf · 25-07-2018 07:15PM

indioblack wrote: »

That's in poor taste, as someone has actually died from this substance.

Well it would be stupid to recommend it if someone hadn't died from it!.

Duh.

5rtytry56 · 25-07-2018 07:19PM

Carry wrote: »

So any ideas how to fuel my fantasies about how to kill an 6’6’’ Ex who openly declared today that he doesn’t give a shìt about me as long as he gets his way?

The crueller the better. Thanks.

Nah. Not really. I don't want my own reputation impacted legally as such.

acai berry · 25-07-2018 07:23PM

MadYaker wrote: »

Based on what you posted if he winds up dead in suspicious circumstances you’ll be number one on the list of people the gardai want to talk to.

Exactly! Have just been watching on ID Channel, the story of how a senior member of the Gucci Fashion family was murdered. His estranged wife of many years had been saying everywhere in public that she wanted her Ex got rid of. Eventually she got a gang of four involved, who did the job. They demanded a huge pay-out from her and when she didn't pay it all, they ratted her out and she was found guilty of murder. She has served 16 years in prison and has been released early for good behaviour. Now she can be seen strolling around the streets of Milan with her pet parrot on her shoulder. Take care, OP!

5rtytry56 · 25-07-2018 07:23PM

vectorvictor wrote: »

I give this thread an hour.

Yes it's after hours but posting a desire or intention to murder and seeking feedback on how?

wrong vector taken there!

How to kill an Ex...

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