How to ask for a seat on public transport?

XxMCRxBabyxX · 03-03-2017 3:57pm #1

So we all know that it's manners to give up your seat if a frail or elderly person or a pregnant woman gets on the bus and there are no seats left, but what if you're a healthy looking person who actually needs a seat? How does one ask for a seat if they need one?

My story: I'm 25 and, as far as I'm aware, look fine and healthy but I currently have severe pain in my back from a displaced pelvis and occasionally issues with my ankle as well. This is, of course, making standing quite difficult, particularly on moving transport. Luckily the few times I've been on the Luas or bus I've been able to grab a seat within a stop or two (one occasion embarrassingly involved an elderly woman having to help me with my bag too), but I don't know what I'd do if I was in pain and no seats became available.

So, what do I say or do if I have ask a person give up their seat? Or do I stand and suffer? Would you give up your seat for me?

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy · 03-03-2017 3:58pm

Become pregnant?

Outlaw Pete · 03-03-2017 4:02pm

Bring a folding crutch / cane with you (they're pretty inexpensive) so that when you are bad you can use it but when you're not you can put it away.

Most people will give up a seat when they see someone is using one and particularly if they look weak and appear to be in discomfort whilst standing.

whiskeyman · 03-03-2017 4:04pm

These days with people staring at their phones, it can be unlikely anyone is even checking if anyone in pain etc... needs a seat.
You may well need to directly ask someone.
I'd hope the majority would offer you their seat if you politely ask and briefly say why.

corner of hells · 03-03-2017 4:06pm

Ask the bus driver if you can drive the bus , he might let you.

jules86 · 03-03-2017 4:06pm

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy wrote: »

Become pregnant?

Being pregnant won't get you a seat on the luas, it didn't get me one at 8 months gone

MarkR · 03-03-2017 4:06pm

As above, folding walking stick for when you need it.

http://www.argos.ie/static/Product/partNumber/8650263/Trail/searchtext%3EWALKING+STICK.htm

podgemonster · 03-03-2017 4:08pm

Have an intense heated debate with yourself. They'll leave you alone, I guarantee!

jonon9 · 03-03-2017 4:09pm

Iv back issues as well that keeps throwing my pelvis out, Waiting on surgery. And even though im in pain I would never ask someone for. their seat

sullivlo · 03-03-2017 4:10pm

Ask someone who is sitting in the "please give up these seats" seats if you can sit down.

pa990 · 03-03-2017 4:11pm

Op must have taken your advice and bought all of them.

lertsnim · 03-03-2017 4:13pm

How would one know if the healthy looking individual sitting on the coveted seat is in pain or not?

9or10 · 03-03-2017 4:16pm

jules86 wrote: »

Being pregnant won't get you a seat on the luas, it didn't get me one at 8 months gone

I think he meant there and then.

Most guys would give up a seat for a ride.

XxMCRxBabyxX · 03-03-2017 4:17pm

Thanks for the posts so far. Tempted by the walking stick plan but it wasn't me who bought up the ones in that broken Argos link! ;-)

lertsnim wrote: »

How would one know if the healthy looking individual sitting on the coveted seat is in pain or not?

This is part of my worry. If I ask someone, what's to say that they haven't a genuine reason for needing that seat too?

January · 03-03-2017 4:23pm

If they've a genuine reason for needing the seat they'll tell you they have and you can ask someone else then, or someone will overhear and give you the seat. Just ask, have no shame about it and if they say no, just ask someone else.

topper75 · 03-03-2017 4:26pm

jules86 wrote: »

Being pregnant won't get you a seat on the luas, it didn't get me one at 8 months gone

8 months! Crying shame that.

The others who were sitting probably all thought you were just another cake gobbler.

So many of them about these days.

pa990 · 03-03-2017 4:27pm

lertsnim wrote: »

How would one know if the healthy looking individual sitting on the coveted seat is in pain or not?

They will have a collapsible crutch

pa990 · 03-03-2017 4:27pm

topper75 wrote: »

8 months! Crying shame that.

The others who were sitting probably all thought you were just another cake gobbler.

So many of them about these days.

You don't get pregnant from gobbling

Neon_Lights · 03-03-2017 4:28pm

Walk around with a walking stick to accentuate the gammy pelvis look

DaeryssaOne · 03-03-2017 4:32pm

jules86 wrote: »

Being pregnant won't get you a seat on the luas, it didn't get me one at 8 months gone

A friend of mine last week who is very clearly about to drop - she is skinny everywhere else and has a 9 month bump got both the bus and dart home without a single person on either offering her a seat, shameful!

ChikiChiki · 03-03-2017 4:36pm

topper75 wrote: »

8 months! Crying shame that.

The others who were sitting probably all thought you were just another cake gobbler.

So many of them about these days.

Ive been in that spot. Afraid to ask someone if they want a seat if they're pregnant as it may just be obesity and you could really offend them. Its difficult to tell at times especially if they are wearing a long coat.

_Kaiser_ · 03-03-2017 4:38pm

pa990 wrote: »

You don't get pregnant from gobbling

No, but it may lead to it

Anyway OP, just politely ask directly. As others have said with everyone busy looking into phones or listening to music they probably aren't paying much attention to anyone else!

biko · 03-03-2017 4:46pm

Reek of pee, everyone will move then

JohnCleary · 03-03-2017 7:57pm

Stop being a pleb using public transport.

Sorted.

:pac:

Tigger · 03-03-2017 8:03pm

ask the biggest meanest looking biker/metal head gaurneteed they are teddy bear

One eyed Jack · 03-03-2017 8:18pm

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

So, what do I say or do if I have ask a person give up their seat? Or do I stand and suffer? Would you give up your seat for me?

Just ask is all you can do. Last time there was a thread similar to this, there were plenty of people who said they would give up their seat, and plenty who said they wouldn't. One would hope to meet the one that would, rather than the one that wouldn't.

I'd certainly give up my seat anyway even though my knees and hip are shot to shìt with arthritis. I'm not so bad I couldn't stand for a bit if I saw someone else in more of a need of a seat than I was. I'd give up my seat for a woman anyway though, that's just manners as far as I'm concerned.

Sam Kade · 03-03-2017 8:27pm

pa990 wrote: »

You don't get pregnant from gobbling

Does gobbling a lump of meat with the lower lips not count

NegativeCreep · 03-03-2017 10:53pm

I'm not sure I'd give my seat up if a healthy looking person asked me. A fat person once shouted at me to get up off my seat and let her sit down. There was nothing wrong with her, just fat. Not that I'd give it to her anyway after her shouting at me. There was also other seats available so maybe she just wasn't all there. I just laughed and went back to scrolling through Facebook.
I certainly wouldn't give up my seat on my commute home. Fuck that, too tired for standing.

misstearheus · 03-03-2017 11:50pm

Can be difficult to tell if someone is pregnant. Dunno would many prefer to stay silent than risk offer a seat to someone they think is pregnant when they are just fat.

Also,

not all pregnant ladies put on a lot of weight so they may not even look pregnant at all, plus I remember one girl in work came in one day looking I dunno 9 months pregnant and the very next day she was her totally flat-stomached self!! :eek: The baby had obviously re-positioned inside her.

afatbollix · 04-03-2017 12:00am

London has rolled out an 'offer me a seat badge' and 'Bump on board' badges so you know who to offer a seat to.

Saying that I recently seen a blind person get on a packed train and just asked out loud can I have a seat please and he got one pretty quick. If you ask most people would get up if you ask.

I've also seen no one offer a seat to someone who needs it and I have asked them while standing myself if they need a seat and this usually gets someone to give up a seat.

__Alex__ · 04-03-2017 1:26am

lertsnim wrote: »

How would one know if the healthy looking individual sitting on the coveted seat is in pain or not?

You wouldn't know so you'd need to ask. You'd hope a healthy person would get up.

How to ask for a seat on public transport?

Comments