And Metallica's New Bassist Is......

Ph3n0m · 25-02-2003 10:34am #1

24 Feb 2003 Metallica is a full unit again, naming Robert Trujillo as their new four stringer.

"We are so psyched and proud to share the news that we are welcoming another brother to the family...(drumroll, Lars!) ROB TRUJILLO JOINS METALLICA!", reads a statement on the band's official website www.metallica.com.

"We've all known, and have been huge fans of Rob since the early '90s when he was a part of the legendary Hardcore / Metal band Suicidal Tendencies. We got to know Rob when we played together with Suicidal in Europe 1993, during the 'Nowhere Else To Roam' tour. We were impressed by Rob's roaring bass style and his very cool, unique vibe onstage, things we got to see again during the '94' "Summer ****" tour when Suicidal joined forces with us.

"My visions of Rob are when we did Summer **** 94 Tour with Suicidal, and Danzig. I remember being blown away by the fierce-ness and seeing Rob, as this monster on bass. He brings an awesome new strength to the band, and makes us step up. describes James.

"Rob was also one of the masterminds behind the 90' cult band Infectious Grooves. He started Infectious' together with Mike Muir, the lead singer of Suicidal. Infectious' delivered classic album titles like 'Plague That Makes Your Booty Move.' He then he joined the Godfather of Metal, Ozzy Osbourne in '96

"I must say Ozzy, Sharon, Zakk, Mike Bordin, all the team and family members mean the world to me. Love and respect, my family 100 percent. I am very stoked, excited and look forward to my new journey with my Metallica brothers. STEP UP! reveals a pumped up Rob Trujillo.

"We've taken a long time to find the right bass player for us. Obviously being a good bass player is important (!!) but it was also very important that whoever we found would fit in as a family member, a brother with a huge vibe. We wanted a fourth band member, not just a new bass player.

"I am very excited for Rob to be in the band and it feels like we are a new band, yet again. said Kirk.

"When Rob came to San Francisco the first time and jammed with us, we all felt this incredible magic between the four of us. It was just something that we could not describe, we all just knew it. Bob Rock told us right after the jam, that it sounded like a ****ing 747 taking off!!

"I am soo ****ing excited to be a full unit again', says Lars. 'The last two years of just being the 3 of us have taught me soo much about myself, about James and Kirk and about Metallica. And to welcome Rob into Metallica in 2003 after all the growth and soul searching we've been through for the last two years, feels so ****ing awesome. Being at full strength again is at this moment indescribable.

"We're ****in' bristling with new energy, new respect, new vibes and a huge ****ing appetite for everything Metallica is. Having Rob here, and him choosing to become a part of our family, will enable us to get to yet another level. So welcome Rob!"

dougal · 25-02-2003 10:42am

Jaysus they talk some Shiite, Brother!!!

cournioni · 25-02-2003 10:45am

I wonder what will happen if Lars tells Rob to cut his hair...

Ph3n0m · 25-02-2003 11:10am

Metallica - The Interview with New Bassist (A parody)

Rob: 'Sup guys

Lars: Whoa, you aer you again?

Rob: Uhm your new bitch?

Lars: A bass player. Ok Bob you can get up off your knees now, I found your replacement

Rob: What? I didnt agree to that

Lars: Yes you did, when you join Metallica I, er I mean we, as a band with all parties having equal input, will get to suck, I mean control, your life and how you play.

Rob: Er what?. Anyway I have some really great ideas, let me tell you them

Lars: Oh no, I am not getting sucked into that arguement again. We had that problem with our last bassist thats why we canned his ass

Rob: Oh.....anyway I have been thinking, you know how all the kids now hate metallica

Lars: They dont hate us, they've just been brain washed by that f**king Napster thingy

James: NAPSTER BAAAAAAAAAAD!

Lars: Well done James, here's a cookie

James: COOKIES GOOOOOD!

(James toddles away)

Lars: Aw bless him. You until I shouwed him how evil the Internet was he would have released rare and great tracks to all of our fans. I mean imagine the amount of money we could have lost!!!

Rob: I see, well can I suggest some **** for the new album

Lars: Fraid not, you see the new album is nearly finished. Here's the music you are to play. Not every difficult and not too fast. Remember being the star, I mean a part of Metallica, I am getting a little too old and everyone has to slow down to suit me, I mean us.

Rob: So you just want me to stand there and play really slow ass music

Lars: Sorry sonny, didnt hear that part. Oh where is Kirk, that queen is always late

(In steps Kirk, decked out in full make-up, wearing a sequence dress and smoking a cigar)

Lars: Now Kirk I have told before about smoking. As the man of this relationship, you have to do what I tell you.

(Kirk goes all gooey eyed at Lars)

Kirk: And that why I love you man. No I mean it, I really love you

Lars: And so you should, the whole freaking world should love me, and soon they will.

Rob: Excuse me guys, new bassist (point at himself) here.

Lars: What you're still here, ok there is some dresses in the back there. I want to see you with a lot of red lipstick

Rob: K.....!!!!

Lars: Oh and Rob, do something about your hair

Rob: Whats wrong with it, perfectly good hair for head banging and moshing

Lars: Thats the thing we dont do that any more

Rob: Since when

Lars: Since I took over Metallica, since I branded Napster as evil, since I've been reaming James and Kirk in the ass and also since I am god here

Rob: You know, maybe I made a mistake..

maybe continued......

(apologies if this is crap, but I always wanted to post a crap message

)

cournioni · 25-02-2003 11:27am

LMAO... very good.

Pugsley · 25-02-2003 5:40pm

rofl ph3n0m, pity its probably gonna be like that

Giblet · 25-02-2003 7:29pm

..I thought you had a secret tape recorder!

francie brady · 27-02-2003 5:33pm

Robert Trujillo is too good for Metallica. He was too good for ozzy aswell. Suicidal were never the same without him. Infectious Grooves rocked. Robert Trujillo is too good for Metallica