Stupidest thing you've said/done/heard

Sangre

This is alot like the other threads but I felt it could have its own one.

Once when I was 15 myself and some friends were buying tickets for an 18's movie, we wouldnt usually have any problems. Anyway, we asked for the tickets and the guy quoted the price, then suddenly my friend pipes in 'We get a discount cause we're under 16'. Needless to say we didnt get in


CAnt think of anymore atm

Mercury_Tilt

This post has been deleted.

ballooba

Queuing up for Fireworks last week. Three of us stroll up to the door, one guy was a fair bit shorter than us two and he was walking behind us. Two of us went in and bouncer goes:
'Hold on a second are you trying to hide him or something.'
So we said we weren't and he asked the bloke if he had any ID. Your man goes 'Yeah no problem' proceeds to go to take the ID out of his inside breast pocket. Co-incidentally his inside breast pocket also contains a bottle of Vodka. The bouncer just turned around and said 'sorry, not tonight lads'. Annoying at the time but pretty funny now.

Karl Hungus

I burnt my hand pretty bad as a kid.
But that isn't really funny...

Oeneus

Last Summer. It was dark. We were drunk. We saw this bush that looked very well trimmed, bouncy, and cosey enough to sleep in. I stepped a good few ft. back to take a run-up and jump into the bush. Turns out it was a stone wall covered in wall climbers! F*ck it hurt!

Neil3030

Originally posted by Mercury_Tilt
many things have I done that are stoopid tbh.

One that springs to mind was when I was a young child. It was crimbo eve and my Dad had pilled loads of pots and pans on a chair at the other side of our door...attached to the door with string... to stop us getting up early etc.

So after much thinking about how we could get past this trap and not having "Mission Impossible" skillz...... I came across the great Idea of waking up my sister in the next room and getting her to take all the stuff off the chair.

So i walked out of the room to go wake her up.....

I still feel like a complete twat all these years later.

Rofl,

Excellent!!!:D

superconor

I burnt my hand pretty bad as a kid.

me 2 angelwhore!!
we must be soulmates.....

i cant think of anything that bad. recently i said to king conor "Im Young for my Age!"

phaxx

Earliest stupid thing I can remember was finding a bottle of pills or something (dunno what it was, and nobody else even remembers the event) giving some to my favourite Teddy, and a few for me. I believe I ended up in hospital.

Many family members have told me that I once swallowed a whole screw, which apparently came out the other end.

More recently, met a nice girl on the train from cork-dublin, smiling at each other all the way up. Began talking when we arrived, found we had a lot in common, and then like a complete tool I smile sweetly and say "Well, hope I run into you again sometime!" and walk off.
No numbers or anything exchanged, all I had was her first name. Realised what I'd done on the bus two minutes later, that was one miserable journey home.

irishgeo

texting a women i know while pissed and telling her how i feel and then waking up the next morning and texting back instead of blaming my mates in the house for sending the text message in the first place.

Drunk pirate

Asked this girl I liked her phone number. "Hey X, whats your"- Some guy walks over "Got the time?". "NO!" I shout. She turns around. "What were you gonna say?". "Eer ehh...do...doesn't matter". Punching myself later.:mad:

yellum

Originally posted by phaxx

No numbers or anything exchanged, all I had was her first name. Realised what I'd done on the bus two minutes later, that was one miserable journey home.

Major D'OH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Runfree

One time at band camp....hehe

Well there was this one night I was out and met this a girl. Got talking anyway and ended up meeting her for da nite(yippie i thought to myself not knowing what I did later that night).

Well closing time comes along anyway the two of are pizzed. then she asks "wanna come back to my place cause I got a free house" and then I reply "No Thanks, Im going to a house party now".

Im still punching myself for that one.

ozt9vdujny3srf

i scalded myself pretty badly with tea, that was a bit stupid(and painful) in retrospect

I tripped over a dog and broke my leg

I broke my friends phemur in a trolley accident.

the lsit goes on...

azezil

oh i've loads:

Burning rubish on a windy day, couldn't get it to lite so i threw some petrol on there. The rubish was in a barrell, and as i was young at the time i had to look into it to direct the match. Droped the match big puff of fire up into my face, burned off one of my eyebrows and my of the rite side of my head was singed.


Another i got in a parked car, and lost! ... very drunk though it'd be kewl to drop kick the front windscreen, triped on the bonnet and knocked myself out cold. (abandoned car btw)


And then there's the 'titanic incident' ... drunk in the worst shit hole in Ireland, i was about 17 and new to tequilla, i had 3 along with several pints. Anyway Celien dion came on, titanic theme, n i stood up on a table and did the whole out-stretched arms thing. Going grand till someone threw a cider bottle at me n know me out!

Yavvy

When I was about 10 I was on an Under 11's GAA football team.
We showed up for a football match a little early and the other team were not ready, so obviously we set about causing as much trouble as possible....Now our opponents were using those crappy
portable goals...you know the ones (made of light steel) anywho...
My self and my good buddy Brian decided that knocking over the goal posts would be the funny act of trouble we were all looking to cause. So we started to swing on the crossbar and the posts started to shake and rock....Eventually they gave way but for what ever reason I tried to catch the posts as they fell ( no I dont feckin know why) ...I couldn’t catch the posts and in turn they landed on my knees, and then trapped me. Now would you believe that having me trapped under the posts was even funnier to my good buddy Brian and my team mates and they left me there for the other team to find me. ( I don’t play with Brian anymore)
I also damaged my knees fairly badly....But I can laugh now..
I can laugh now....I ..CAN..LAugh....
When I was about 10 I was on an Under 11's GAA football team.
We showed up for a football match a little early and the other team were not ready, so obviously we set about causing as much trouble as possible....Now our opponents were using those crappy
portable goals...you know the ones (made of light steel) anywho...
My self and my good buddy Brian decided that knocking over the goal posts would be the funny act of trouble we were all looking to cause. So we started to swing on the crossbar and the posts started to shake and rock....Eventually they gave way but for what ever reason I tried to catch the posts as they fell ( no I dont feckin know why) ...I couldn’t catch the posts and in turn they landed on my knees, and then trapped me. Now would you believe that having me trapped under the posts was even funnier to my good buddy Brian and my team mates and they left me there for the other team to find me. ( I don’t play with Brian anymore)
I also damaged my knees fairly badly....But I can laugh now..
I can laugh now....I ..CAN..LAugh....

Karl Hungus

Ah, funny thing I just thought of...
At one fatefull LAN, I dared a friend to jump hurdles over a few chairs lined up. He did, and said 'Y0re tUrn!!!!' so I did... I crashed through the chairs, and landed BANG on my knee! It went completely black, and I went to the hospital with it then a few days later.

But no, that's not the stupid part.

The stupid part has yet to come...

About a week later, Galway beers...





...




We were playing Knuckles!!! :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

One fell swoop from Kharn was enough.
My god did I feel stupid!

Gordon

Probably when I was twisted on a New Years celebration, I was walking home and saw two knackery scangery young men having a fist fight. Their "beehatches" were pulling them off each other and the scangers were still at each other's throats.

For some reason I decided to walk through their fight. They suddenly forgot their petty argument and got stuck into me! They broke my jaw (again). I'm such a tit when I'm drunk

Sangre

Okay one day I was sailing with a friend on a very small boat, could only fit two people. It was a beginner boat, cant remember name. Anyway I'm working the rudder, and everytime you turn the boat you have to duck under the sail and switch sides. Ok so I'm sitting at the back and decide to wrap the rope of the sail around my hand while steering. 'I dont think you should do that' my friend said. 'Why?' I said, no sooner did I say that I was pull backwards over the boat. So I'm being dragged along behind the boat in windy conditions so we're going pretty fast. So while being pulled along I look up and see my friend laughing so hard he capsizes the boat!

The whole time in the water I was choking thinking to myself 'Omg hes gonna capsize that thing if he doesn't stop laughing'!

One of the funniest/stupidest moments of my life, we still talk aobut it

Neil3030

This one time, my mate's girlfriend was writin a text message and i, for some bizarre reason, informed her of her mispelling of the word "ur". And I was serious!!

Man, i've felt like a prat for a while as a result of that!

Tails

Ran over the dead ball line in rugby, but i swear the try area was tiny!

Lex_Diamonds

Goin' for a piss up the top of a mountain on a really windy day...

oeNeo

Years ago I was going with this girl. I didn't really know what to "meet" someone meant. My friends asked me if I was gonna ask her to meet me, I thought they met the actual meeting of people. I walked up to her and said "Will you meet me at the shops today?" or something similar. Everyone in the class started laughing at me but I didn't know what I had done! Pretty dumb if ya ask me :P

gogo

I managed to fall down a man hole while sneaking out for a fag at a school debate, broke one ankle and dislocated the other ankle.
The fuping shame of it. Tripping over it would be one thing, falling two feet into it is a different story.

But it gets better, my younger brother and I were going up to dublin to stay with my sister, and she was taking into town to shop, so we are at the bus stop when the heinz beans bus comes along and my brother screamed blue murder that he was not getting on the bus painted with pictures of beans. He kept shouting "what if people see me getting off a bean bus", thought i pass out laughing.

gogo