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Kids books aint what they used to be.
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20-04-2000 3:04am#1
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Sorry I couldn't resist changing the top post.
Original post here.....
Sheesh.This is hilarious, thought I'd pass it along.
Sincerely,
Buttercup Girdlelips
The following is an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants", by Dav Pilkey: The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names.
Use the first letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name:
* a = stinky
* b = lumpy
* c = buttercup
* d = gidget
* e = crusty
* f = greasy
* g = fluffy
* h = cheeseball
* i = chim-chim
* j = poopsie
* k = flunky
* l = booger
* m = pinky
* n = zippy
* o = goober
* p = doofus
* q = slimy
* r = loopy
* s = snotty
* t = falafel
* u = dorkey
* v = squeezit
* w = oprah
* x = skipper
* y = dinky
* z = zsa-zsa
Use the first letter of your last name to dertermine the first half of your NEW last name:
* a = diaper
* b = toilet
* c = giggle
* d = bubble
* e = girdle
* f = barf
* g = lizard
* h = waffle
* i = cootie
* j = monkey
* k = potty
* l = liver
* m = banana
* n = rhino
* o = burger
* p = hamster
* q = toad
* r = gizzard
* s = pizza
* t = gerbil
* u = chicken
* v = pickle
* w = chuckle
* x = tofu
* y = gorilla
* z = stinker
Use the last letter of your last name to dertermine the second half of your NEW last name:
* a = head
* b = mouth
* c = face
* d = nose
* e = tush
* f = breath
* g = pants
* h = shorts
* i = lips
* j = honker
* k = butt
* l = brain
* m = tushie
* n = chunks
* o = hiney
* p = biscuits
* q = toes
* r = buns
* s = fanny
* t = sniffer
* u = sprinkles
* v = kisser
* w = squirt
* x = humperdinck
* y = brains
* z = juice
Thus, for example, George Bush's new name is Fluffy Toiletshorts. Go figure
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