Making someone gain weight

Oeneus

Hehe. I know this is one hell of an evil scheme but... my brother seems to be incredibly anti-fat! If he sees a fat person on the street he will point and laugh, if he has a dispute with anyone that is remotely tubby the only abuse he will give out would be in relation to their weight.

I was wandering, is there anything that I could slip into his food on a regular basis to just make him inflate like a balloon. See how he likes it!

May I point out that I hate the bollix!

rymus

isnt that a tad irresponsible? and perhaps a little dangerous too? Sure its all for a good cause but its probably not the best idea from a medical point of view.

Having said that, Im sure if you put some of that weight gain powder that body builders etc use it would have some kind of effect. If not that then you might be able to convince him that chips & pork pies are part of a daily recommended diet.

A safer option all round would be to get him really really drunk then put a 'fat suit' on him. Just make sure you make it really REALLY difficult to take it back off..

shinobi

Get him drinking Guinness and let nature take it's course.....

Karl Hungus

Hmm... I'm not sure that's really possible, to be honest.


But stand fast! - [Baldrick]I've a cunning plan![/Baldrick]

Get him drunk.
Get him really extremely drunk.
Get him so drunk he passes out.

Ok, got that so far?

Next part is...

Hire the FATTEST hooker imaginable.
A big 25 stone bitch!

Now, you add the two ingredients together, in a bed, mix well... And then add a hearty dose of self-esteem shattering photoghraphs, to be used at many, many a later date.

Chances are, he'll hit the beer hard, and become a lard-o just like his love-pig.


Evil...
Evil evil evil...
THAT my friends, is a cunning plan!

rymus

trust AngelWhore to come up with a refreshingly brilliant plan.. It works on so many levels... that and its something you can post on a forum (quite like this one) if he ever pisses you off

Asok

ah just get him to quit smoking most people tend to baloon after that


on another note simply hit him over the head with a frying pan make a lateral incision along the abdomen and start shoveling in frytex RARR thats good eating

hussey

Get him to go on a diet
- cause every fat person I know says they are on a diet!!

Wolf

Personally I dislike fatties myself its so unnaturel. However, unlike your brother I dont bring it up in ppls faces and thats unecuseable. What you will find is that most ppl like him and me that dislike fatties have an insecurity about been fat. Dont get me wrong im not fat at all but if someone called me fat it would get to me and id ask ppl "im not fat am I?!?!?". So id recomend getting everone to call him chubby to begin with and twist his mind ul have him in trears in no time.

the fnj

Conor your so fat that you show up on radar.

Send him off to america you have not seen fat people till you've been to america.

Wolf

What ever thom (stoopid spelling) you are big, gangly, chubby and GINGER omg feel the waves of pity washing towards you

Fanj is so fat his birth cert is a blue print.

Tellox

sugar. and lots of it.
get him into computers so much that he becomes housebound, and leave a lot of crisps/junk food around and watch those lbs gain..

DapperGent

Originally posted by [-UK-]Wolf
What you will find is that most ppl like him and me that dislike fatties have an insecurity about been fat. Dont get me wrong im not fat at all but if someone called me fat it would get to me and id ask ppl "im not fat am I?!?!?".

I bet you're so tubby you can't even smile.

OLDYELLAR

yeah the fat hooker be deadly , an make sure you gots a camera , an then when he points at some body heavy , you could show the heavy person the foto , ah itd be sooo funny

pickarooney

Get him hitched, then watch him pile on the pounds. And give up oral sex.

Carbiens

probably getting slighty off topic here but,
i too am against fatness although i would'nt say it to someones face, but i wish i could be a bit heavier, im not exactly as thin as a rake but im border-lining it, and i was wondering if there was any serious way of gaining weight

DapperGent

Try Weight Gain 4000.


May cause irreversible damage to kdneys and liver.

Carbiens

hehe BEEFCAKE..he he he