Problem with boss

vorbis

Not as majot as some of the other stuff here but still annoying none the less. 2 weeks ago I took up a job (for summer and winter weekends) as a barman in a country pub. Having not had a job for the start of the summer, I was grateful to get something. The owner seemed ok at first. She made a few comments about me being slowbut that was about it. I thought fair enough first couple of days need to get used to wher the stuff is.
What has happened since then has been a drip drip of incessant criticism. She'd give out over a smudge on a glass, not turnig on a specific light in the bar etc. On their own each criticism is pretty small but they all add up into something more. As far as I rememember she hasn't said one word of praise so far. I'd not looking for self adulation just fairness. I was wondering was I the worse barman ever when I noticed the locals calling the job a prison sentence. Not being from the area, I've found out that she goes through staff fairly quickly and has acquired a reputation. The problem is how do you deal with someone like this. I'm not sure does she realise how nasty she can get. Should I confront her or just get a new job. Chances are the first option will lead tot he latter. Anyone been in a similar situation.

WhiteWashMan

Originally posted by Unregistered
Solution:
Beat the crap out of her!

dats roight boiy!


anyway, 2 points,

1)its her bar, she can tell you whether she is unhappy or not about something.

2)you are paid to work, not look for compliments.


having said that, she is obviously not very good with people, has no managment skills, and doesnt understand about employee happiness.
so you either do 1 of three things

1)leave
2)put up with it
3)address the issue in some way, most likely by talking to her, and telling her. she may not realise shes like that and when brought to her attention will change it. or she might sack you, in which case, youre sorted either way.
apart from having no job, but yer a student type so youre expected to bum of us hard working folk....

LegacyUser

just quit man, bar work sucks anyway. the womans obviously just a b!tch. work is hard enough as it is you dont need a whore from hell boss on top of that, yes you are being payed to work not to be complimented, but still you have to think of your stress and self esteam levels, plenty of jobs out there, dont sell yourself short.

ferdi

seamus

I had a boss like that before. She would always give out if something wasn't perfect, but I was never told when I did a good job. I don't think anyone can take that kind of pressure (unless you're an obsessive-compulsive perfectionist). She had been promoted because the original boss fell sick for a while, so she had never had any kind of management training, and was a bit of a schizo at the best of times anyway. I eventually left because of her, and she left early on my last day, leaving me a small note on the desk :rolleyes: I was 16 at the time, so we had developed a boss -v- rebellious teenager relationship. We hated eachother.

She constantly complained that I wouldn't use my initiative, but I was afraid to, because when I did, she complained, and even if I choose the perfect course of action, she'd say nothing.

Do exactly what WWM says.

Thanx 4 The Fish

As has been already mentioned, ya are paid to work, not be praised, and really why should you expect praise for doing what you are paid to do, correctly ?

If you haven't washed a glass properly then really that is your fault and if you haven't tidied up properly then, again, that is your fault and really you should live with it.

If you can't take criticism for a job badly done then maybe you should just leave.

darthmise

G'wan name the pub!

zAbbo

act like a nut job on the loose constantly flicking your head and talk to your self, act like you got some sorta tick going on and limp occasionlly, may not help you with your job prospects. But nobody(your boss) wont really wanna give out to a maniac.

and now for the real help, you`ve only a few weeks left, smile be cheerful, say yeah no problem a lot, don`t complain etc.

If shes says wash the glasses again just wash them again after all its her pub. Think of the money.

Also you try riding her, normally takes the edge of most birds

OLDYELLAR

think of the money , an if she has a reputation , then its grand its not just you , an shes probably annoyed that she`s stuck there for the rest of her natural days , an your just waiting to leave ,,,,,works a bit*h , i swaer i will torch the place i work at before long , jaysus theres only so much you can take , but yeah money is money .

zenith

This is the classic problem in employer-employee relationships: do a search on google for managing your manager, it'll take a bit of rummaging, but there's good tips there for improving communication, providing the manager with feedback, and for making them realise that you've more to offer than a strong back and a pair of hands.

What have you got to lose? She can only fire your ass.

Venom

Maybe you just really suck at what your doing and barwork aint your cup of tea?

If you hate what your doing just quit and look for something else that might be more suitable to your personality.

vorbis

Actually I can handle critcism fairly well. Whats annyoing is constant bitching about small things. Anyways I'll be gone at the end of the week. She told me on Monday that I was wasting a pint and a half a pint!! For anyone who's worked in a bar you'd know thats ridiculous. She seems determined to fire me and says I'll be let go at the end of the week if I don't improve. For the record, no I don't waste any where near that amount. I'd do well to waste a pint over a days work. I'm already looking for a new job, it was only a summer job after all.

l3rian

anytime she says something that annoys you just say "what?" like you didnt hear, make her repeat it maybe 3-4 times, and then say "yeeeaaah alrite" like it was a waste of time, this should slow her critisism down a little as she wont want to talk to you

Thanx 4 The Fish

Originally posted by vorbis
Actually I can handle critcism fairly well. Whats annyoing is constant bitching about small things.

Where I'm from that's called criticism...

Spunog UIE

ya see ya should of said something earlier on so as to nip it in the bud. If it was me i'd say something clearly that i didn't like the constant crap ur getting, say ya she didn't tell you whatever before then ask how she'd like it done. Actually if it was me i'd probally follow all that up with some sarcasm about gettin the glass crystal clear etc' breath on it and some squeaky cleanin but be prepared to be fired

Beenin a lowly old student i've had a fair few jobs, something to know about hese jobs, they always start off nicey nicey, what with the legal induction or whatever but the second thats over its done, they try to screw ya for extra hours keep ya late etc. Ya gotta stay in charge and just intend to do what u want/need to do and give it to them straight simple and clear. if ya say no ya mean no, don't haggle with them. Also be prepared to be fired. If ya last as far as 6 months tho or whatever is the "testing phase" usually set out in the contract, its a lot harder for them to fire you, cos they be ****tin them selves you'd sue for unfair dismissel and they'd be dead right to fear. Most of these jobs suck but ya gotta do them, imho don't pay them more respect than they deserve, do your job as best you can with out killing our self (ur not gettin paid enough to do that) and that should be good enough. If its not good enough for her then she gotta fire ya if she doesn't she's all talk and like most managers likes to flex their "power" or sense of it. If ya find your self gettin fired from loads of jobs its probally u tho anyhew probally gone way off topic but ya, i hate sucky jobs but needs them, ohhhh to be finished college and to be the asshole manager, la la la.

*summary, tell her to get off your back, nicely, but be prepared for losin the old job*

vorbis

pretty decent advice, I think I can get another job so I'm not too worried. No I don't have a habit of getting fired from jobs :-) Its actually the first boss I've come across thats caused problems. Small things are like forgetting to change the only tape (cd played is broken) for the 40th time in the day or or missing a piece of a crisp on the floor.

thedrowner

i cant believe some of the negative advice youre getting! yeah i had a problem with a boss like that before, sometimes it felt like a paradoxical situation, during the first few months of the job there was a lot of learning, and shes give out to me for trying to do somehting of my own accord and doing it wrong, or else she'd give out to me for not trying to do something, even though she knew she hadnt shown me yet and i would have arsed up!

The weird thing was with her, was at times she was really friendly and just one of the gang, and at other times she would bring tears to my eyes i was so sick of all the little things! Eventually i learned to put up with it, bitching a little with the other people in work who were experiencing it too helped. What really used to get to me is that shed NEVER get mad with any of the good looking guys in work, and a couple of people even walked out on her, she used to nit pick so much...but if you turn a blind eye you'll find its easier! I later discovered that this boss of mine doesnt even realise she's nit picking so much, its just her way!

i work in a pub too and a pint a night is below the average (if ur working in a fairfly busy pub) so she is obviously looking for thigns to give out over. I felt for ages in my old job that i was so slow, and id never catch up with anyone else, and if id gone along with all the nit picking i would've been demoralised even further!!!i ended up being a supervisor!

'Actually I can handle critcism fairly well. Whats annyoing is constant bitching about small things'

'Where I'm from that's called criticism...'

thats just silly. Constant bitching about small things makes you feel so small, its very upsetting, and for me, i found that i used to get so nervous around her that id make even more mistakes because of how scared id feck up in front of her, because she makes such a big deal. I learned to say like it or lump it in the end, i was doing a good job, ok i make a few mistakes occasionally, i dont mind being given out to for that, its life. But if she actually does sack you for all the small things, then ur better off without the job!

vorbis

drowner are we working in the same place??????
Thats exactly what she's like. When shes around filling a pint takes on a whole new dimension. You'd be half worried something would go wrong in front of her.

thedrowner

yeah, its a pain in the neck
dont think were working in the same place, coz my boss is a guy! but in my old job twas a bitchy woman

i do agree with the others in that its a job, and theres no need for u to be praised, but theres no need for her to bring u down like that either, its only gonna make u more nervousso that u make even more mistakes. u just gotta deal with it, or leave! as i said, i dealt with it and its grand now, just ignore her! unless shes making such a big deal that she sacks u...u cant ignore her then i guess, but at least u know that u didnt really deserve it.

Aspro

Originally posted by Thanx 4 The Fish
As has been already mentioned, ya are paid to work, not be praised, and really why should you expect praise for doing what you are paid to do, correctly ?

It's called motivation. Any employer who persists in treating their employees like dirt deserves to have the hassle of high turnover. After all, it's YOUR work making THEM money. The least you can ask for is a little respect.
Having said that there are very few enlightened managers or bosses out there, in my experience, and no matter how good you do your job, the most you can seem to ask for is that your wages are correct and paid on time.
I used to work in the catering trade for a few years and had the pleasure of working for an almighty wagon similar to your own boss. She made life a living hell for us and often had us working one or two hours unpaid overtime doing petty menial tasks to satisfy her own control freakery.
As it turns out the problem was sexual frustration, because as soon as she found some lobotomised fool for a boyfriend she did a complete Jekyll and Hyde and gave us some welcome breathing space to get on with making a living.

The question is, Vorbis, how far are you willing to go for a bearable work environment??;)