The simpsons

Canaboid

1) "Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for Daddys,and kids with fake IDs."
2) "Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."
3) "You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had an electrified fooling machine."
4) "Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel."
5) "If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers."
6) "To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems!"
7) "I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over 50, and if its SPEED changed, it would explode! I think it was called, 'The Bus That Couldn't Stop"
8) "I want to share something with you - the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, 'cover for me.'
Number two, 'oh, good idea, boss.' Number three, 'it was like that when I got here.'"
9) "Marge, you're as pretty as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda."
10)"Step aside everyone! Sensitive love letters are my specialty.
'Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. population: you.'"
11)"Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time. Just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow.
Well, good night."
12)"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get."
13)"Lisa, if the Bible has taught us nothing else - and it hasn't - it's that girls should stick to girls' sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing such and such."
14)"Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way."
15)"Stealing! How could you? Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain whats-his-name?
16) We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughin', did you?"
17) Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'sir' without adding, 'you're making a scene

TwoShedsJackson

18) Mayor Quimby: God forbid we should have a town council meeting that doesn't end with us digging up a dead body.

Wyverne

19) D'oh

---

This is Commander in chief of the USS Esses, signing off.

Hecate

20. "Dont poo-poo a nickle Lisa, a nickle will get you a cheesecake and a newsreel, with enough left over to ride the trolley from battery park to the polo grounds"

Canaboid

21) Ralph: "Hi, I'm Doctor stupid and I'm going to remove your liver bones"

Illkillya

"operator? give me the number for 911!"

bubbles

Hi, bubbles here. You may remember me from such posts as "Daneel" and "Graphic Card help" on the quake forum.

22) Ralph: Me fail english? thats unpossible.

the celtic tiger

23)"I start fires!!!"

24) HOMER: "Potato Man"

25) Homer is going to deliver the goods in the chaps lorry
Bart: "Can I come?"
Homer: "Don't you have school?"
Bart: "Don't you have work?"
Homer: "Touchée!"


tct

TinCool

26) Homer: "If something is too hard it's not worth doing"

Lucutus

Quote from Homer at a party for the principle of Springfield school, after a whole room full of people realise Seymour Skinner, has faked his identity for years...


27) "Keep looking shocked and move slowly towards the cake"