Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

asleep in church

  • 17-05-2002 11:05am
    #1
    Rabies
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,258 ✭✭✭✭


    A man goes up to the minister at the local church. "Reverend, "he
    said, "we have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What should I do?". "I've noticed this and have an idea if you're up to the task," said the minister. "Take this hat pin with you. I will be able to tell when Mrs. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give her a good poke in the leg." In church the following Sunday, Mrs. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mr. Jones. "Jesus!" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg with the sharp object. "Yes! You are correct, Mrs. Jones!" came the minister's quick reply. Soon, Mrs. Jones nodded off again. And again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer? "he asked the congregation, motioning toward Mr Jones. "My God!" howled Mrs. Jones as she was stuck again with the pin. "Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face. Before long, Mrs. Jones again nodded off. However, this time the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few hand gestures that Mr. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet his wife with the hat pin yet again. The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?" As Mr. Jones enthusiastically poked his wife's thigh with the hat pin piercing her skin she screamed, "You stick that f*****g thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your arse!" ,"Amen!" replied all the women in the congregation.


Comments

Advertisement