Irelands dumbest criminal

Hobbes

From today's 'Examiner' newspaper (Feb 9th, 2000)

Criminal takes the bus and talks his way to prison by Liam Heylin

ONE of the most inept drug deals of all time came unstuck for Ireland's unluckiest criminal on the 5am bus from Dublin to Cork. A lot of things went wrong for 25 year old Gavin Cray that morning but the first of them was where he chose to sit. "Is this seat taken?" he asked. "No," came the reply from Detective Garda William Dawes, one of the most experienced members of the drugs squad in Cork city. The detective's first impression was that Cray was high on some kind of drug. Step two in Cray's downfall came when he took three packets from his pocket, just to look at them. The detective correctly identified them as heroin but said nothing. But it wasn't until Cray's mobile phone rang that he really set about digging a hole for himself. "I have the stuff, you won't believe this ****," Cray said. It must have taken a lot for the detective not to turn to him and say that he really couldn't believe it either. A few minutes later, the phone rang again. Discretion proved to be beyond Cray this time too. "I have the stuff. Meet me at the bus station. Bring plenty of money." But Cray, from Greenmount Buildings, Fernwood Avenue, Tallaght, Dublin, had yet to play his trump card. Relaxing in the ill founded knowledge of a job well done he produced a nodge of cannabis and rolled up a joint which he smoked on the bus. Detective Dawes decided not to arrest Cray on the journey in case there was a scuffle on the crowded bus. So, shrewdly, he told a girl who was getting off the bus along the way that he had a bad leg and asked would she mind getting him something in the shop. Closer to Cork, he used the bad leg story again and asked Cray if he would sit on the inside so that he could stretch his leg in the aisle. Cray agreed, not realising he had effectively signed his warrant to prison for dealing £60 worth of heroin. The detective introduced himself and told Cray the bad news when they reached Cork where the dealer was well and truly cornered. For the record Cray was given three months in prison at Cork District Court yesterday, on top of the nine months he is already serving for another crime.

© The Examiner, 2000

[This message has been edited by Hobbes (edited 10-02-2000).]

Paladin

Hmmph.
Wouldnt be so funny if it happened to you.

Steven

Don't worry Pal. He'll be out soon, and you'll get your stuff then