If you could be an inanimate object, what would you be and why ?

EvilGeorge · 13-02-2002 2:35pm #1

If you could be an inanimate object, what would you be and why ?

Well, at first I was thinking "Lampost" but could not think of a reason why, madness maybe, but I think I'll go with "BaseBall Bat", its the only way I can be a hard bast*rd!!

Gordon · 13-02-2002 2:41pm

Ye, you wouldn't want to be a lamppost what with all the territorial pissings of dogs, cats, giraffes etc...!

I would be a horse saddle

Dr. Loon · 13-02-2002 2:42pm

I'd be a vibrator, although I could end up some places I don't want to be

seamus · 13-02-2002 2:54pm

Can a vibrator be classed as an inanimate object?

Thats about the best suggestion I've heard though..........

Saruman · 13-02-2002 2:54pm

Oh here we go its one of these posts...

Lets see... I dont know a book.. maybe.. no i know.. a Telescope! Yup a window on the universe and a source of knowledge (same answer goes for both Book and Telescop!)

Dr. Loon · 13-02-2002 2:58pm

Originally posted by seamus
Can a vibrator be classed as an inanimate object? Thats about the best suggestion I've heard though..........

well I consider inanimate as dead, or not living, and a vibrator isn't alive... although it has a good buzz

smoke.me.a.kipper · 13-02-2002 3:01pm

i would be a block of apartments. who'd know what you might see and hear!! especially at night

Gordon · 13-02-2002 3:04pm

deadly buzz!
Actually inanimate means in motion or with movement so to be pedantic a vibrator is animated sometimes. But it probably is the best one to be... actually scratch that what about one of these chairs that has one fixed to it...

Hey I see where this thread is going... uh oh

Dr. Loon · 13-02-2002 3:16pm

Originally posted by Gordon
deadly buzz!
Actually inanimate means in motion or with movement so to be pedantic a vibrator is animated sometimes. But it probably is the best one to be... actually scratch that what about one of these chairs that has one fixed to it...

Okay, then I'd just be a plain old dildo, just as much fun, but I'd be missin out on a bit of a buzz
:rolleyes:

leeroybrown · 13-02-2002 3:24pm

One of the extra long "two seater" ones perhaps.

Yerac · 13-02-2002 3:32pm

Pat Kenny - Although, I think that's a step below inanimate.

Dr. Loon · 13-02-2002 4:28pm

Originally posted by leeroybrown
One of the extra long "two seater" ones perhaps.

Yeah, I like the way you're thinkin'... thing is I'd probably have no control over the things I'd have to penetrate, obviously I'd be praying for lesbians, but things could go wrong... it doesn't even bare thinkin about

leeroybrown · 13-02-2002 5:47pm

/me groans as his stomach lurches.

I still think the odds are pretty good. (Unless of course you have some startling insight into dildo usage statistics?)

azezil · 13-02-2002 6:31pm

The Sun.

Giver and taker of life.

Karl Hungus · 13-02-2002 6:47pm

Hmm... An inanimate object, huh?

I'd be me after a night out!

The Sweeper · 13-02-2002 7:38pm

A cucumber.

You get to be cool, your aim in life is to be eaten, and occasionally, if you're really lucky, life can get really, really interesting...

Boston · 13-02-2002 7:45pm

A cucumber is alive

The Sweeper · 13-02-2002 7:47pm

What're you, the founder member of the cucumber rights group?

Mills · 13-02-2002 8:16pm

I'd be a security camera placed somewhere busy, like the city centre. As inanimate objects go I don't think you can get much better than sitting somewhere interesting and just watching.

Irish_Ranger_IR · 15-02-2002 9:28am

I love to be McGyver.....

Kidding... Kinky Knickers, size 10 to 12, now that could be a lot of fun............

Captain Janway · 15-02-2002 9:34am

i think that i would enjoy being a dog who lives in a good home.
Our dog'slife consists of moving from one spot to the next and falling asleep again.

Boston · 15-02-2002 9:49am

do you people eve nknow what inanimate means

Beruthiel · 15-02-2002 9:59am

a mary jane pipe

The Sweeper · 15-02-2002 10:50am

Originally posted by Boston
do you people eve nknow what inanimate means

Yes. You seem to think that living things can't be inanimate. I'd argue the case with you on this one... I would accept that inanimate would include fruit/vegetables for instance, because I don't associate animation with life, just with movement - if it doesn't move of its own volition, it's inanimate...

Boston · 15-02-2002 10:51am

what about a dog

The Sweeper · 15-02-2002 10:55am

Hey, I was only arguing with you slagging my cucumber suggestion. Feel free to slap Captain Janway about the place. Hey - I might even join in!!

leeroybrown · 15-02-2002 1:10pm

Dogs also have the joys of reproductive activities with complete strangers.

(well more often than the rest of us)

The Sweeper · 15-02-2002 2:09pm

Originally posted by leeroybrown
Dogs also have the joys of reproductive activities with complete strangers.

(well more often than the rest of us)

That was so far off topic it was almost back on again.

Guess who's in heat.

Morpheus · 15-02-2002 2:36pm

34C WONDER BRA!!!

WHAT FUN

Walls · 15-02-2002 5:14pm

Hmm... I think I would like to be a world famous gorgeous piece of art - something that people admire and come to see for ages... yup, that would be me.

Boston · 15-02-2002 5:22pm

and plants do move, they move towards the light, its somethign called geotropisium, or something like that

Saruman · 15-02-2002 5:23pm

every thing in the universe moves in some way.. the universe included!

EvilGeorge · 15-02-2002 5:25pm

I just liked the sound of the work "inanimate" you can debate about it all you like!

SHAMAN · 15-02-2002 5:27pm

This would be so trolled if we still had that forum.:p

Bard · 15-02-2002 5:27pm

Originally posted by Minesajackdaniels

Yes. You seem to think that living things can't be inanimate.

Well they can't.

... but then again a cucumber isn't alive- not once it's been picked/plucked/whatever...

I don't know what I'd be, to be perfectly honest... it needs some thought.

n.catenthusiast · 15-02-2002 5:29pm

I'd be a brain in a jar-that's inanimate, assuming it isn't quivering, or the water in the jar isn't bubbling or something...

azezil · 15-02-2002 5:40pm

Originally posted by Boston
and plants do move, they move towards the light, its somethign called geotropisium, or something like that

Geotropism - plants response to gravity.
Phototropism - plants response to light.

azezil - the green mod

Boston · 16-02-2002 10:36am

thats the one, i allways got those two mixed up

scuzzy · 16-02-2002 6:20pm

I'd be a Gibson Les Paul

Why you ask?
Well it'd probably get more love than any of the objects mentioned above;)

Kali · 16-02-2002 6:51pm

a comet.

screw you guys im going to jupiter.

Victor · 16-02-2002 7:09pm

Originally posted by Bard
... but then again a cucumber isn't alive- not once it's been picked/plucked/whatever... I don't know what I'd be, to be perfectly honest... it needs some thought.

Isn't it whats called 'dead'.

Monkey · 17-02-2002 2:12pm

in·an·i·mate

1) Not having the qualities associated with active, living organisms.
2) Not animated or energetic; dull.
3) Grammar. Belonging to the class of nouns that stand for nonliving things: The word car is inanimate; the word dog is animate.

If something is dead that means it was alive at one point but water for example isn't alive and never was.

lampsie · 17-02-2002 7:01pm

A public toilet.

I take so much random sh1t from strangers that I might as well get 10 cents a go.

- lamps

Monty - the one and only · 18-02-2002 1:34am

And that signifies the end of theis muppetisim

If you could be an inanimate object, what would you be and why ?

Comments