"getting over" people

katiegordon

Hey i know this is probably just another stupid teen thread but its really stressing me out!!!I dont know what im asking for i suppose its not really advice just to know that other people have felt the same way.
i find it so hard to "get over" relationships.Even ones that werent serious and guys who i was never mad about.its so frustrating because it never seems to take anyone else or the guys im with so long.The worst part is i know i can forget about them im just waiting for someone more interesting to come along!!!
i dont need to be told these are just stupid teen crushes because i know that!but yeah did anyone else ever feel this way or am i just wierd......!!

AARRRGH

Lots of people get hurt easily when they are rejected/when they break up/when someone doesn't return their affection/etc etc.!

As you have stated, some get bothered more than others. Some don't get bothered at all. Some get highly depressed.

You're definitely not weird.

And it doesn't necessarily get easier as you get older

Hugh Hefner

I had to read your post twice to make sure I was "getting" it.

I feel the same way sometimes. I don't know if what I sometimes feel is on a par with what you have but I know what you're talking about. Especially the, "someone more interesting," bit. I get that too.

But you know, I find it gradually just fades. I mean, it may take a while but a month or two after a break-up I just find myself thinking, "Huh. I haven't thought about them in a good while," and that's when I'm over a relationship. You just suddenly realise that it doesn't bug you anymore.

Dunno if that was helpful...

g'em

katiegordon wrote:

its so frustrating because it never seems to take anyone else or the guys im with so long.

trust me, it only seems that way!! looooaaads of people take time to get over partners, there's nothing wrong with it. time really is the best healer, and you do get there in the end. i think as you get older, you just get a bit more adept at handling the situation, and you tend to see the bigger picture a bit more (you're no wiser, its jsut that hopefully you've learnt from the hundreds of mistakes you;ve already made )

It'll get easier, I promise.

NoDayBut2Day

*hugs*

I know how you feel. Sometimes I go through days where I'm like "I'm so totally over it!" and other days when I just feel like the world is ending.. haha. But yeah... just give it time. Time heals all wounds. Yes, many many people face the same thing everyday.

Take courage.

McGinty

Ditto to the others, some people dissapear very quickly from my mind, but other men, who I may have only had a short laison are still in my head ages afterwards, and yes, they are the ones who dumped me, so maybe its the whole rejection thing. Also maybe all the mini rejections add up to a whole issue within yourself, I am bending towards that thinking myself, its not the men but the rejection of me that was the problem, a good way to recounter that is to remind yourself of the men you've rejected, most times you didn't want to but felt you had to because you didn't feel that strongly towards them.

Laguna

The reason I think you feel so broken up over your relationships that have failed is the fact that it boils down to you being rejected, now I'm well aware you may well have dumped the guys on some of the occasions but regardless of that, when a relationship ends, both parties still have a sense of rejection as the relationship itself was unsuccessful and therefore (whether openly or subconsciously) will analyse and reanalyse themselves to see why it didn't work (or to allocate the blame to why it didn't work out - usually to the other person).

I'm not being condescending to you when I say this, but I'm assuming you're going out with teenage boys (as opposed to lads in their early to mid twenties), which in itself offers an explanation. Teenage boys are inherently immature, 9 times out of 10 they're looking for sex, not a relationship with a girl, this being down to the raging testosterone levels in their bodies. It's only when males start to get into their twenties (even then, a small number of males) start to mature a little and maybe begin to desire something more from a girl, then again there are always exceptions to this rule and maybe you might meet a teenage lad who's the best thing since sliced bread. Frank as that sounds, I believe it to be true..

Civilian_Target

McGinty wrote:

Ditto to the others, some people dissapear very quickly from my mind, but other men, who I may have only had a short laison are still in my head ages afterwards...

Bingo. Some girls take weeks to get over. Some take years.

dundalk cailin

you're not weird katie, loads of girls are like that, i myself feel upset/ hurt when rejected, even if it wasnt a 'serious relationship', after all, u can b attracted to someone upon meetin them and its hard when they dont feel the same

you seem round 15/16, correct me if im wrong, im 19 and i get that too so dont worry!!