Training Problems

Cabelo

Hey Guys,

As everyone here will know, I play as much capoeira as I can (limited only financially and by my girlfriend). The problem is that whenever I'm not playing I'd like to be practicing. This was easy enough during summer but harder now.

My real issue isn't time though; capoeira is not the most regular of MAs. All of my family do or have done TKD, even my father (now 40) wants to start training in it. The problem stems from this acceptance of more rigid and "acceptable" MAs. I live with my whole family somewhere nicely out of the way and used to enjoy practicing outdoors while everyone else was out of the house.

My father has expressly forbidden me from practicing not only anywhere near the house, but also anywhere people he knows might see me and associate him with me. Some of you have seen just a little of what I do and I have been improving steadily since I played with you. My father has never seen capoeira; he gave a video no more than a cursory glance and remains thoroughly unimpressed. The bigger problem is that he shows an active disinterest with learning about it or ever seeing me practice, prefering to stick to the idea that everything about it is impractical and just strange.

Possibly due to an off the cuff comment made by one of my siblings I can no longer practice anywhere near where I live. This means that I can't look outside at a sunny day and decide I would like to practice. So here's the question...

You guys have seen what I do and hopefully understand that it will take continuous practice to continue to improve. What do you recommend? I'd appreciate any advice.

Thanks,
Cabelo

Dyr

That seems bizarre, whats their problem with capoera? Is it because it seems more dance orientated or effeminate than regular MA's?

Maybe practising off somewhere safe from prying eyes will be more in keeping with the roots of the art anyway

Roper

Hmmm, only going from my own experience of living at home. Me and my da disagree on everything. That's Da's and sons. He hated me doing kickboxing, only donkeys kick was his favourite saying. But he got used to it cos I persisted. That said, he wasn't the sort to forbid things. He was more a comic commentator, which is far more annoying. Anyway he's not the boss of me anymore, I can to to the movies on a weeknight now, pronto.

Hmmm, this has no point except to say persist. If someone can't understand well then they'll just have to accept no?

Solution: Switch to MMA. Move up north. Train hardcore for 2 solid months. Challenge your father to a cagefight via "bald buddhist man wielding scroll". Batter him til you nearly win. Realise that father/son love i truly deeply important. Fake losing the fight. All differences have vanished through the medium of ground n pound.

Millionaire

Very difficult to change the way parents think. it wastes so much energy. Dad is always king of the castle at home, his patch, his rules.

Kill them with kindness. do your training elsewhere.

he nice simle say hello, but give them no info at all on what you do. thats the way to deal with that.

and someday you will have you r own place and and you can do what you like.

Rev Hellfire

I'm confused as to what exactly your father objects to in capoeira.
Is it capoeira in general or some particular element of it ?

Colm_OReilly

Maybe try explaining that you are doing a performance art, or that you are preserving an artform. In that way you're not that dissimilar from Mosart or Hemmingway.

paddyc

tell your da to f**k off, its your life, tell him not to lead his life through you


paddy

BrianD3

My father has expressly forbidden me from practicing not only anywhere near the house, but also anywhere people he knows might see me and associate him with me.

What age are you? No offence but your Da sounds like a pr1ck with a big ego. So he's forbidding you doing something because he's ashamed that someone will see you at it and it will reflect badly on him? Jesus Christ it's not as if you're going off selling drugs or something. What's he going to do to you if you do practice this Capoeira and he catches you. Is your father a bully?

Cabelo

No, the problem is that he's a dead nice lad... which means that I'd rather do what he says like. In every other respect he's really sound. Which makes this the real kicker. He can't object to anything about capoeira because he knows literally nothing about it. It's all about what the siblings say, which is variously, "It's just weird," "It's got no point," "It's useless in a fight" etc. He's very about MA for self defense and doesn't see how acrobatics and the like could possibly help.

I tried the performance art and preserving history gigs a while back... didn't really work out. He works very near the aul' house y'see... so he's afraid of work peeps asking him wtf is going on I reckon. I'm just gone 19 but the fact is Oi Love Me Da, roi!? But jesus doing something that needs this much space is a head wrecker sometimes.

vasch_ro

go to your local park, thats what i do to practise Kata (forms)

soma

Cabelo wrote:

It's all about what the siblings say..

.."It's useless in a fight" etc.

Beat up your TKD sibilings using capoeira.. Q.E.D.

Seriously tho - you're always going to have non-sensical clashes with your parents (man.. this sounds like I'm posting on personal issues!) even tho they're sound/agreable when it comes to most other things in life.

When I was living at home at 19, and doing kung fu, my mother decided that I must have a "violent streak" in me (to understand how hilarious this was you should seen how underweight I was at 19!) to be doing a MA :rolleyes: Whereas my Dad thought it was cool.

Also at the time (due to majorly underweight thing) I also wanted to join a gym but was pretty much banned cos the Traditional Irish Mammy(tm) was worried that gyms were merely bastions of homosexuals *ROFL*

My point here is while you're living at home you're always gonna have these wtf? moments w/parents.. it's most often a generational thing.

Roper

Move out.
Then you can be like me and go to a movie on a weeknight, pronto.