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another day

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  • 06-09-2005 9:38pm
    #1
    cuddles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5 ✭


    off i go, as before,
    unable to stop.
    memories cetch up on me
    and send me off to rot.
    never before have i felt this way,
    a way of disbelief.
    no ones comeing back for me,
    for i am all alone.
    and right now alone i stay,
    for better or for worse.
    this is how i lead my life,
    for another day.
    when this loney day shal come,
    ill need no one else.
    for i have learned on my own to stay,
    for thats the only way.


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    #2
    jimmidy_cricket
    Closed Accounts Posts: 192 ✭✭jimmidy_cricket


    I dunno, a bit all over the place you start off with "off i go, as before" suggesting that its a regular thing but by the end of the poem your saying "when this lonely day shall come" as if it hasn't happen, so I'm kinda lost; are you lonely now? or were you lonely before and now your just anticipating being lonely again, which is making you lonely? Its kinda messy, maybe just needs a bit of tidying up


  • Options
    #3
    cuddles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5 ✭cuddles


    i wasnt realy basing it on anything inparticular but on things im noticing around me..


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