Mazes

Le Rack

Scar tissue limbs
Hold the world up,
Each and every day.
The thought of you
Once sealed an open wound,
Where now, blood gushes through.

A single hush within the din,
A soul slashed into threads.
Fervent words were always spoken,
Not quiet savoir-faire,
But incandescent all the same.

Sitting; stitching a soul back together,
Sliver by solitary sliver,
An evil circle, twisting and turning.
Twisting and turning, from ending to ending.
Not even your contortionist mind can fit.

the raven

"Not even your contortionist mind can fit"

after reading all your recent poetry this is the only redeemable collection of words. ignore the rest and the ego petting comments, try harder and don't try too hard. do without doing.

but the line above, if structured a little differently, is absolute fried gold.
honestly, good work, the line is excellent.

Le Rack

I knew you would like that line, and please don't take this with any offence, but your opinion of good is different to everyone elses thats just how it works like, and a person can't get massively better over night, I've seen my own work has improved over the past few weeks/months, and I appreciate your help, but I'm not writing to please you, I'm writing what I feel, I still want you and your comments all over the shop but, telling me to scrap stuff is not going to get anyone anywhere.

Waltons

I don't think it's right to say that his opinion of good is different to everyone else's. I have to say when I read your earlier stuff I didn't like it but decided that since you'd either go away or keep writing I'd just keep an eye on this space. I would agree with you that your work has been improving but, as you said yourself, you're not going to become the best writer in the world overnight. It does take practise.
You may think The Raven's comments about scrapping things are a bit harsh but his opinion is equally as valid as the people who are praising you to high heaven and, while you may not wish to scrap things, at least take the criticism on board as much as you take the glowing comments on board.
I'll be reading your stuff anyway. More like this one please

Le Rack

I never said his opinion, was invalid, I told him to keep them coming, but in almost every time he hs posted back to me on my work he has told me to scrap things, and its been mostly his comments that have changed/improved my work, so I assure I am taking it all on board. Thanx anyway.

Waltons

I never claimed that you said his opinion was invalid. It's just by saying that his opinion of what is good is different to other people's opinion it seemed like you were taking him less on board than other people but you've cleared that up by saying that you are heeding his advice.

Le Rack

ah no, I didn't mean it like that, just that everyones opinion differs, but I defo do take on his comments