Just Broke UP - Dunno wat to do

AllMessedUp

Gf broke it off with me about 2 weeks ago, dont know what to do. need some advice. we were with each other for a long time. If any one can help please send a private message, really appreciate it

The Failed God

Im in the same boat,she broke up bout a month ago cause she "didnt feel the spark anymore" we got back for about a week but then ended it again.. Im jst a youngin but still god it sucks, really hard to get over,i still like her and im gettin over her but she says we will never get back together down the line which kinda hurts it dont make sense how she can go from sayin she loves me to that..we want to stay friends but she's a really flirty girl and another prob is she works with me and iv seen her in town wit a few guys since which eats me up inside thinkin of it..really dunno what to do ,never thought a girl could have this effect on my its like a cloud hangin over me...blaa ne ideas?

Gilgamesh

All MessedUp, I think, but I might be wrong.... but I thought this forum was to discuss matters in the open with people who pretend they are all knowing and wil make you feel better. ;-)

But Hey, Life goes on, and most of these threads go in the way of... 'you'll get over it in time' go out and have fun, you are on an open market. Sorry if any sarcasm was in there.

But honestly, you will get over it and their are planty of fish in the pond for you to get, time heals everything.

find somethign to do to distract you, get a hobby, go to the gym, o sing on grafton street if it pleases you. Even sex can be substituded these days (ask you're five friends)

AllMessedUp

I know, its just hard to bare after so long. I lost all my mates when i went out with her...by choice.

seamus

AllMessedUp wrote:

Gf broke it off with me about 2 weeks ago, dont know what to do. need some advice. we were with each other for a long time. If any one can help please send a private message, really appreciate it

There's nothing you can do, it sucks. Simple as that.

I think there is really only two things you can do: Avoid spending time on your own, go see your mates as much as you can. Get a new hobby.

Just saw your next post now. Go reclaim your mates. You might feel like a git for only coming back now that she's gone, but if they're real mates they won't mind.

Sifo

ah sounds tough mate, give it a bit of time, we all go through this sh*t once in our life (2 or 3 times myself), but you learn so much from it, it's gonna be tough for a while and getting your friends might not be easy.... in future never ditch your mates...

Bateman

Get pissed.

Re-decorate your room.

Re-arrange your music collection.

It's not so much "don't spend time on your own", it's more a case of "don't sit still for too long".

AllMessedUp

its a really long story. Dont want to post it up here but would appreciate it if someone would read it via private message- any takers?

meditraitor

There is nothing anyone can do or say that will make it better dude, only time will sort it, put a brave face on and try to get on with your life as best as possible.

Gilgamesh

why not post it here?
I mean, if you write it to someone via PM you can put it here.

but if you want, sure PM me

bringitdown

Keep busy, go out and get busted, been there, it hurts but you'll be all the stronger for it.

And hey, if they are real mates they will forgive you and next time you meet someone you won't forget them for it.

/Radioactive Man

UP-AND-AT-THEM!

Radioactive Man/

AllMessedUp

yeah, but my whole life was all about her for the last 4 years or so...big gap left

bringitdown

Try 5 years mate, and I still haven't looked back.

I just made a resolution to not be broken by it. Surrounded myself with friends, activities, family, etc.

Read all about it : http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=236824

Gilgamesh

just read the PM you sent me, man my head is spinning.
tbh, the problem you have is that you built your entire life and existence around her.
you became too dependant and allthough she allegidelly was the same, you must consider that she just didn't want to hurt you.
getting comfortable in a relationship is the most deadly things you can do as it will nearly always kill the 'spark' in it.

my advice would be to maybe stay away from finding a relationship at the moment and just enjoy yourself, if it is true what you wrote, then you lost a lot of time to have fun and meeting others.

I am also only assuming, that she may have had an affair with someone else, if it is correct how you wrote certain things. but I could just be plain wrong in that.

She got to a phase where she felt like she needed to have a life outside of your relationship and she took the chance when she started the new job to do this.

I feel sorry for you, but imho you should read exactly what you sent me, and you will find the mistakes. Both of you or maybe even just you, were too dependant on this relationship and wanted it to last forever too much.

also, how many relationships did you have before that? I would guess none or hardly any. but you didn't mention that.

First love is a bitch to forget if it went wrong, and I don't think one can completely, but you can accept and learn from that experience and try to do it better next time


man, my fingers are hurting now from writing this.

but I think I have covered most of the PM you sent me.

IT WAS 2 PMs LONG!!!!

AllMessedUp

thanks all. Ive rang around a few mates. There shocked, thought we were joined at the hip. If its meant to be its meant to be i suppose...

Gilgamesh

good luck to ye

BaZmO*

We've all been there mate and the best bit of advice is (doesn't sound like it at the time though) is TIME!!! Tis a great healer.

B.

AllMessedUp

yeah i know, she wants d single life, not in love anymore, i need a break too. cheers ppl