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parents meeting the parents

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  • 13-07-2005 6:16pm
    #1
    uberwolf
    Registered Users Posts: 7,580 ✭✭✭


    this isn't something that concerns me per se, but I reckon PI remains the most appropriate forum.

    i've been with my GF for several years now, we've both gotten to know the others parents fairly well. But our parents have never met - through there never being opportunity or need.

    I was just wondering how normal that is? Only something to worry about on the wedding day? Or are we a little odd? How's it gone for people?


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    #2
    CathyMoran
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 7,458 Mod ✭✭✭✭CathyMoran


    The parents meeting one another is not that bad - in the end it is you and your gf that matter - your parents will just try to get along in any case for your sake. When I was in a long term relationship my parents met my then bf's siblings a few times and they did sent Christmas cards back and forth and both sets of parents asked for one another via their kids but that was about it - they only met once.


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    #3
    seamus
    Registered Users Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    My parents and my gf's parents have met twice I think in five years. As you say, the need nor the circumstance has really arisen.


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    #4
    nesf
    Registered Users Posts: 27,645 ✭✭✭✭nesf


    I'd agree with the above. It's very much a thing of chance and such. Unless your parents live close to each other, they aren't going to meet up often "on chance". It would have to be arranged and such.

    I've done this in the past in one relationship. It went fine, and everyone got on with each other and it really wasn't a big deal.

    But I'm far more relaxed about this kind of stuff than some people. I know friends of mine for whom such a meeting would be a huge step in the relationship.

    Personally, I don't quantify relationships I'm in by such occurances, meetings and stages. I think it's bull**** tbh. Two groups of parents meeting each other should only happen when both groups want it. It's not a major event or anything.

    Imho.


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    #5
    Plastic Scouser
    Closed Accounts Posts: 132 ✭✭Plastic Scouser


    My parents and the boyfriend's parents met last year, after we had been going out for nearly 2 years.

    As I'm from the UK and my boyfriend is from Dublin, it was a bit weird as my folks had to make a special trip over to meet up - it turned it into a kinda 'event' if you know what I mean, and made things seem even more forced than they might have been normally!

    I'd have preferred that they'd just been able to meet naturally at some other occasion i.e. a family get-together, but as they're in different countries that was unlikely to ever happen!

    I'd decided to move over to Dublin so that was really the spur that made the parents meet (mainly so my mum could check out where she was letting her daughter move to!), but I don't think that it's normallly something to be too concerned about - your folks will meet eventually, even if it's only at the wedding!! :)


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    #6
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I've actually known of a few occasions where the parents havent met untill near the wedding and in one case at the wedding.
    It's probably not anything like the majority of cases but its not unusual either.


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    #7
    Bamboozled
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,178 ✭✭✭Bamboozled


    My mothers has never had occasion to meet my partners parents. One family's in Cork, the other in Shannon.

    My mother has asked about it, if she ever would meet, what would they do for such an occasion etc.

    Both families are pretty easy going, so its not a major issue to me or to my mother. I havent ever spoken to his parents about meeting up because it's never been an issue.

    i dont think it would go badly at all if they did meet. Through myself and my partner, his parents gave my mother their mobile home for a few weeks to have a break free of charge in a nice seaside place. I thought it was quite a lovely thing to do, but they still never met up since.


    I have wondered about it at times though.


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    #8
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    uber
    I have been with my bloke for nearly 6 years now, my parents have never met his mother (father passed away) - I have never felt the need or even thought about why/should they meet....


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    #9
    Kingp35
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 12,256 Mod ✭✭✭✭Kingp35


    Me and my girlfriend have been going out for 3 years now nd my parents and her parents have only ever met once. her parents live in Athlone and mine live in Dublin so because of that it had to be arranged. we did it at christmas time too.

    I thought it was a bit serious to be getting the parents to meet but I agreed to it anyway and it all went well.

    I think poeple view it parents meet as being a bit of a big step and its a point where you realise that your relationship is becoming quite serious. Well it was for me anyway. Saying that though I dont really think there is any need for parents to meet. If it wasnt suggested to me I would never have even thought about. I guess it reallly has to do with the poeple involved but it nearly always turns out well and the two sets of parents will always try to get on for your sake


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