It's Stupid but i had to write it down

GrumPy

Recently, (within last few months) i began talking to a girl online, i knew it would never go anywhere, and as the weeks past i rarly ever talked to her. Now, at some stage, when i first started talking to her one of my best m8's got her email (i gave it to him at one stage or anther, dont ask why, cause i dont know) she gained interest in him and he told me, i got pissed, as i felt him talking to her was an invasion of my privacy, after an argument with him (i know it's stupid just some online chick you'll never meet right?) he realised he shoudn't have become involved and said sorry for talking to this girl that i had on my buddy list, it wasnt his place to add people to his messeneger that he got off someone else (even though it was my doing) after a while, even now, i rarly ever talk to her, about one month ago, my good m8 had her blocked, but after he installed new messenegr or something, she was unblocked and talking to him again, he asked me if it's "ok" to chat back, and i said yeah, sure i dont talk to her much, and it's no big deal, it was silly the argument. But i find out today, that he met up with her last night, as she was in dublin for the weekend (down from the north for the match) it was my fault it ever happened, and im still not sure what did happen, im prolly being an idiot, but i still cant see me and my friend acting the same way around each other, out of all my closest freinds, he was the one i felt most comfortable with. i dont even know why im posting, i just think i needed to see my stupid story on paper (screen) anyone else experience a freind related problem? and did you ever act same way around each other?

WhiteWashMan

youre annoyed becuase youre friend is talking to someone you have no interest in.

are you 12?

seriously. grow up.

Glipmac

You're 16/17 go out and get a girlfriend, seriously man if you were never going to meet her why bother dwelling on the past there is plenty more women out there.

The only other thing to do is to talk to your mate, and see what he says about it, he's your mate after all he will understand...

GrumPy

I aware the whole situation is stupid, but it still means me and my m8 wont get along as we used too. Small, silly things can feck up things too.

Glipmac

trust me he will understand if you explain it tactfuly not "i dont want you talking to her" say somthing like "look i know you get on with her but iths makes me feel a little uncomfortable" or somthing like that, if your ubrupt about these things then it will go wrong just talk to him and take it easy

GrumPy

yeah thanks, but as i said she's from the north, and i think the whole them meeting up, was "one to remember" ie. they aint gonna see each other again, and probably had as much fun as they possibly could, if you know what i mean, he says he is "sorry" even though i had lost interest in her, and it's silly stupid, and im a retard, but i still cant see how us, as freinds can go on like normal.

kittenkiller

Get over yourself.
Just cuz someone's your friend doesn't mean that they can't be anybody elses as well!
& lets face it, she prefers him to you anyway.
It's over.
He scored her (with your permission) & they both enjoyed themselves.
Ask yourself why it was up to *him* to stop contact with her rather than the other way round?

It's over now & after a while & when you score someone else & forget about her things between you & your mate'll settle down to normal again.

GrumPy

hmmmm... Yeah i suppose. Thanks.

secret_squirrel

Irish GrumPy wrote:

i still cant see how us, as freinds can go on like normal.

Maybe Im missing something here -

you gave your mate her email - anything that happened after that is out of your control.

Your friend doesnt need your permission to do anything with her.

You didnt even give this girl any attention.

You do not and never will own this girls attention. Your mate had nothing to apologise for. If anything he deserves and apology from you for your childish behaviour.

You need to cop on and grow up.

The only reason you cant be friends is because you are behaving like a spoilt child whose throwing his toys out of the pram.

Irish GrumPy wrote:

im prolly being an idiot

Couldnt have said it better myself.

Crucifix

Irish GrumPy wrote:

but i still cant see how us, as freinds can go on like normal.

Seriously, I really don't see any reason why this is so. I'm greatly confused, could you elaborate?

Chinafoot

Irish GrumPy wrote:

i knew it would never go anywhere, and as the weeks past i rarly ever talked to her.

So you weren't really interested.

Irish GrumPy wrote:

Now, at some stage, when i first started talking to her one of my best m8's got her email (i gave it to him at one stage or anther, dont ask why, cause i dont know)

you gave him her email address. why exactly did you give it to him if you were so against him speaking to her?? doesnt make much sense to be honest.

Irish GrumPy wrote:

he realised he shoudn't have become involved and said sorry for talking to this girl that i had on my buddy list, it wasnt his place to add people to his messeneger that he got off someone else

again, why did you give it to him? and as for him realising he shouldnt have become involved....sorry but thats crap. you had zero interest in this girl and she clearly had no problems chatting away to him so whats the problem? they obviously liked each other enough to meet up. you're obviously just jealous, which is ridiculously immature since you didnt even talk to her much :rolleyes:

Irish GrumPy wrote:

he asked me if it's "ok" to chat back, and i said yeah, sure i dont talk to her much, and it's no big deal, it was silly the argument.

i'm very confused to be perfectly honest.

Irish GrumPy wrote:

im prolly being an idiot, but i still cant see me and my friend acting the same way around each other, out of all my closest freinds, he was the one i felt most comfortable with.

you're right, you are being an idiot. Kittenkiller hit the nail on the head. you need to get over yourself. you gave your mate the go-ahead to chat to this girl....and in my opinion he didnt even need your permission as you have said yourself that you werent interested and rarely chatted to her. you dont own your mate and you dont own this girl, so any friendship they may develop is none of your business. had you been interested in this girl i would have perhaps had some sympathy.

if you and your friend will be acting differently around each other, i would bet any money that it'll be you that will be causing the difficulty. time to grow up me thinks.

GrumPy

Jeez, ok, ok maybe i say it totally wrong i did have interest in her, just didnt see it developing any further then online, so kinda grew out of it, I realise i was stupid anyway, plnety of regrets, Thanks for the help.

WhiteWashMan

by the way, if you upgrade or delete MSN, the contacts are still blocked. those are server side settings, so your friends telling you porky pies if he sys it just became unblocked

and just admit youre jealous and youa re just having a melodramatic hissy fit at your mate because you feel stupid about it.

secret_squirrel

Irish GrumPy wrote:

so kinda grew out of it,

But you obviously havent grown out of it have you? Think you need to sit down and have a good think about your attitude towards other people.

Chucky the tree

my god your a tool.

Nevyn

no personal insults
Please read the charter,
Have a nice day.
Thaed

nobodythere

Irish GrumPy wrote:

I aware the whole situation is stupid, but it still means me and my m8 wont get along as we used too. Small, silly things can feck up things too.

That's your doing!!! Stop being jealous over nothing. I think you have to confront the real problem

Edit: To be a little more constructive, you're simply jealous that she likes your friend better than you. Your friend did absolutely nothing wrong (except unblock her when you asked him not to), but prior to that you were just being... I don't even have a word for it

TerrorFirmer

Dont be so harsh on him.

Granted its no big deal, but WWM, so what if he was in fact 12? Just because he feels bad doesnt mean he wants people telling him to grow up.

If he could just snap his fingers and feel better, he would. But he cant.

And I actually understand where hes coming from.

Too tired to reply to the op but honestly, no point telling someone to just grow up for posting an issue that affects them. As long as it affects them, isnt it an issue for them that deserves to be treated with respect?

BeardyGit

Reading this reminds me how traumatic the life of an 11 year old really can be at times. Imagine having to deal with the "Best Friend" league tables again. And the whole imaginary girlfriend thing too. I'm glad I have a big pair of liathroidí to remind me that I'm not a child anymore....

Get over yourself is right....

Edit:
Just read the above reply - He'd better get over it before his friend (and whatever other friends he has) gets over him. There's the constructive input from me. Real friends don't stand in each others way just because they refuse to take the initiative themselves....

WhiteWashMan

MobileInfantry wrote:

Dont be so harsh on him.

Granted its no big deal, but WWM, so what if he was in fact 12? Just because he feels bad doesnt mean he wants people telling him to grow up.

If he could just snap his fingers and feel better, he would. But he cant.

And I actually understand where hes coming from.

Too tired to reply to the op but honestly, no point telling someone to just grow up for posting an issue that affects them. As long as it affects them, isnt it an issue for them that deserves to be treated with respect?

no offence, but if you post on a public forum, be prepared to get the reactions of people on it.
this is my reaction.


or perhaps you feel that we should coddle the OP, tell him its ok, that his friend is nasty, and really re-enforce those feelings within him?

besides, just as i have the right to post my own personal feelings on this subject, you , and the OP, have the right to ignore it...

by the way, what makes you think i dont treat every person on here with respect?
i give the amount of respect to people and posts that i deem them worthy of. we may just have different levels of respect for different people.
but i dont disrespect anyone.
i think you worry too much. perhaps you should post on PI about it?

Stabshauptmann

You sound jealous and possesive in this situation. Really, you have a problem with a girl talking to somone else. Thats just bad form

Often amongst friends certain girls will become off limits, if you were seriously interested in her and were giving it a shot, if you were invilved, or if it was an ex of yours.

Learn control, learn not to get jealous, and dont make a mountain out of a mole hill.

Is what really pisses you off that you think he scored her or went further and that could of been you? Your friend didnt steal her and I wish more men would get that into their head.

Fast_Mover

Ya i think you really should get over it..
dont let it get in the way of ur friendship with ur friend..i think he much more important then some girl...swear if u goin out with her or something and it not lik he "stole" her from u.
she clearly found it acceptable to chat to your friend and had no worries about it..she even met up with him....just move on and forget about it...
Chin up ay!

f_m