Suicidal Friend

logic

I have a friend who is now in very severe depression, no job, will have nowhere to live in 3 days and who is spending all his money on coke.
He won't come out of his room or even go to the social welfare for
money. I know he is considering killing himself. He is very sick in the
head.

Everyone has tried talking to him and tried to get him to go to
counselling but he won't go. Is there anything I can do?
Can I have him taken in to a mental institution or some
rehab centre against his will?

He will be either living on the streets or will kill himself. I'm abit lost as to what to do?

amazingemmet

If you think he is a danger to himself you can have him commited for observation against his will. I think you need to talk to a gp about it.

Nevyn

ring an ambulance for him may be your best bet.

amazingemmet

Please don't do that but you might put the ambulance crew in danger. When they commit people they like to have four-five guards present to make sure everyone is safe

logic

if he is going to attempt suicide, it will probably be the weekend. Thats when he'll have no where to go. He still has some drugs left i believe. I think the gp is a good idea, i'll do that in the morning.

tinkerbell

Apparantly an intervention is a popular method to try and get the person to realise they have a problem.

But I doubt that'd work in this case. If he's feeling like that, then he needs to get proper medical help. Call up a GP and ask them, and get them to arrange something.

redraider

logic,

I am just writing off the top of my head stream-of-consciousness style, so bear with me.

Perhaps try to get a group of his & your friends together and talk to him.

Let him know that ye are there for him and can help him.

A phone call to the Samaritans may help.

Perhaps if you contact AWARE ( Depression Support Group) they can advise on how to best help him. www.aware.ie They are professionals and good at what they do.

You need to keep a very close eye on him and ensure he is not on his own at this dangerous time. Perhaps you could get a group together and take shifts.

Hope this helps, let us know how you are getting on.

logic

If we try to watch him or we all try talk to him, he will get very aggressive and possibly violent. He says he doesn't what any help. I listen for movements from the other room and ask him if needs anything in shop or something if i don't hear anything. I'm really tired of it all and feel like washing my hands of it but I know that not a choice.

CaptainPeacock

Your friend has an illness. If you want to help you need to get him to a place where he can be treated, maybe even cured. In your mind, try replacing his depression with a more tangible sickness (like cancer) and ask yourself what you'd do in that case.

redraider

logic,

It seems you / your friends are in a position to keep an eye on him which is good. You just need to hang in there till his drugs run out. It is the drugs making him violent methinks ( laymans opinion )

This will be your chance to get through to him.

Try and make sure you have a plan ready for this i.e. his family around when you estimate this is going to happen

Another idea: Could a group or you get into the room when he is not high and talk? eye contact could work wonders. Again just a thought.

Is this making any help?

Stabshauptmann

CaptainPeacock wrote:

Your friend has an illness. If you want to help you need to get him to a place where he can be treated, maybe even cured. In your mind, try replacing his depression with a more tangible sickness (like cancer) and ask yourself what you'd do in that case.

Brilliant post

Stabshauptmann

redraider wrote:

logic,

It seems you / your friends are in a position to keep an eye on him which is good. You just need to hang in there till his drugs run out. It is the drugs making him violent methinks ( laymans opinion )

This will be your chance to get through to him.

Try and make sure you have a plan ready for this i.e. his family around when you estimate this is going to happen

Another idea: Could a group or you get into the room when he is not high and talk? eye contact could work wonders. Again just a thought.

Is this making any help?

When the drugs run out

He will become ultra agressive : 1-4 days

Prob get more drugs, if not

He will become ultra depressed with bouts of violence: 2-4 weeks
A semblance of normality with much mood swings: a year

Victor

logic, I've sent you a PM

This is one of the times where you need to be there with your friend, but at the same time, I'm not sure if any of is is equipped to deal with a "coke fiend". This is very much a case of "go to doctor". You are not ratting on your friend, you are helping him.

A friend tried coke one in college and neither ate nor slept for 3 days. It frightened him enough to never try it again.

He will need a huge amount of support. Best of luck to you and your friend.

Kell

Victor wrote:

This is very much a case of "go to doctor". You are not ratting on your friend, you are helping him.

Vic, is there anything a doctor can do in this instance given that Logic isnt a direct family member? I know, unlike Emmets statement, you cant have someone involuntarily committed unless you are a direct family member.

Logic- without meaning to sound like a c*nt, you sound like you and your friends have tried your best and it may well be time to walk away. This isnt your burden and only a professional is equipped to offer your friend any help.

Wishing you and your friend the best.

K-

Victor

Kell wrote:

Vic, is there anything a doctor can do in this instance given that Logic isnt a direct family member? I know, unlike Emmets statement, you cant have someone involuntarily committed unless you are a direct family member.

As I understand it, yes. All it takes is two doctors to get someone admitted for assessment.

Logic- without meaning to sound like a c*nt, you sound like you and your friends have tried your best and it may well be time to walk away.

Not just yet. Logic, you must prepare yourself that you can't solve everything.

Volvoboy

Logic, i too was suicidal at one stage last year after contemplating killing my family as i was going to kill myself and couldnt bear what my family would be going through, anyway i spent time in a mental hospital for 3 mts after geting refered there by my gp, id strongly recomend you bringing your friend there there, it might be a bit hard getting him in as your friend is as he's
on coke, but take my word from a person who was there its the best thing for him

p.s people who openly talk about taking thier own life, 75% dont.
but dont dismiss your friends intentions.

logic

Sorry for not coming back sooner

Update:

Told his mother and we rang aware.ie, his aunt and uncle went up to him,
he has left everything and went with them. He has agreed
to go into treatment. I believe its the rutland centre he is going to.
I heard that its very expensive.

Thanks for all the help.

He has to check himself in and he is willing to do that. If it was
the case that he wouldn't or wasn't willing, there are no options then.
From what I have understood from all the advice, if a person is a danger
to themselves and are refusing help, they can not be taken in anywhere.
No wonder suicides are so high in this country.

Thanks again