Annoying Workmate

TerrorFirmer

I got a new co-worker recently. She seemed really nice, but now I really don't like her.

She's really giving out this feeling thats she's superior then me, and when I make a mistake, rather then point it out, she starts giving out like she's my boss or something. I can't really explain it in words, but I really don't like her and I dread making even a tiny mistake lest she start complaining.

Just there, she started giving out to me and calling it a disgrace over something that was actually not really anything to do with me directly. I just had to sit there feeling like a fool, like she was a boss giving out to her secretary.

What the hell should I do about it. It's really annoying me to put it lightly.

deedee lepoopoo

IGNORE HER! Seriously, by blantantly ignoring someone in work really gets up their nose AND then if she pees you off so much then EXPLODE and say HOW DARE you talk to me like that. The worst thing to do it to be real 'it's not my fault...blah blah blah..'. You are not answerable to her, so you do not have to explain yourself to her.

I worked with a complete billox there a few years ago. After a while of him being a p8ick, I had a big scrap wiith him and punched him in the balls (that last part is not advisable, but makes a good story). He actually had more respect for me after the verbal fight.

pickarooney

Yeah, most of what deedee says is probably the way to go. Stare at her and whistle, she'll go nuts and quit eventually.

Raiser

Why sit there feeling like a fool when it wasn't your fault? No offense, but thats just an invitation for your colleague to treat you like a fool on any whim or impulse.

You need to assert yourself - pick your fights carefully and dispense with any accusations etc. by pointing out any unfairness/inconsistencies etc. Make it clear that this freak is both wrong and being painfully irritating.

Any onlookers will hopefully identify these injustices and will not want themselves to be in this persons firing line at some point - invite support from them.

You'll appear stronger if you can dispense with this petty person through a series of calm, measured, firm responses than if you have one or two uncontrolled out-bursts.

kittenkiller

When she starts off on one just walk off on her.
Blatently turn your back on her!

Or just keep tellin her that it's not her business!

Fcuk her!
Ignore her.
Stop speaking to her in any social capacity & keep not of how much time she wastes giving out to you & if she's really getting to you tell her to spend her time more productivly!

B!tch!

amazingemmet

I'd go with the ignore her advice, cause if she's annoying you she's probably doing it to most other people in there too and eventual when no ones speaking to her she'll get the message. if she doesn't try some of these. i like the shaving foam one myself http://www.ebaumsworld.com/officepranks.html

spooydermot

I had someone like that a while ago, I just ignored how she talked to me and continued being polite to her, my collegues later told me that they didn't like the way she acted and thought it was very civilized of me not to take the bait and start to act like she was, but to be honest somethimes I wished I'd turned around and told her where to stick it....so I guess its a double edged sword.
I guess you just have to bear in mind that people will see how you react , not just how she treats you, and if you react in a negative way it can make you look bad...how do your other co-workers feel about the way she treats you?

koneko

Tell your boss, so it's on record. That way later on if she gives out about you, your boss will have already known about existing tensions or problems.

I would agree with Raiser to an extent. You have to assert yourself aswell, and don't just sit there ignoring her. If you work with someone, you can't ignore someone and do stupid things like whistling when she talks, if anything she'll end up making a complaint about you being unprofessional.

Red Alert

ignowhen you say new do you mean that you or she are new to the company or that both of ye have never worked with one another before?

i'd just ignore her like kittenkiller says - just walk off. she's not a boss and she cannot do anything to you.

Roddy23

Ye mobile, I too am having a problem in my job aswell.
There is this chap in my job who is always wreckin me head, he's on here occasionaly and when he is, he keeps making up serious waffles, then he'll start talking sh!te about how gr8 he is later on in the afternoon. But he is just a tw@t...
Sorry bout the language just he gets right up my nose.

too_much

I know the feeling well... started a new job 2 weeks ago and the head chef has a major problem with me, for no reason. My managers have all said I'm doing really well and tons of customers have praised me personally (It's only restaurant work between uni terms) but the head chef has just decided that I have an "attitude problem" even though I'm polite and just get on with my job.

It got me down at first because I don't like people disliking me for no reason, but then I figured it this way: he's an old man, a chef, and I see him for a few hours each week. I enjoy my job, it's close to home, and it's helping pay off my debts, so balls to him and his problems. He can't get me sacked as everyone knows I work hard, so I'll just keep doing my shifts and leave him to it.

You can't let these people get to you... As someone said, ignoring them can work best because some people only wind you up just to get a reaction - giving stuff back to them can just encourage them, if they're attention seekers. Try a few things out, or just do what I do: say "k" and carry on. One thing I've learned fast in life is that in 99% of the jobs you can do, there will always be morons trying to create problems for you. Pushing past these problems is the key to happiness

Hope I've been at least SOME help!

Eoin

Possibly better suited to the work forum, but as koneko says, first speak to your boss so it is on the record - you would be surprised how many people let this kind of thing happen, and their boss never knows about it.

Then, document every inappropriate comment / action that she makes so you can back up your claims if it continues.

Megatron

Go to the boss let him/her know about it.

then take her aside ( lunch is usualy good) but do it so just the 2 of you can speak .. tell her is there a problem ? and explaine the attitude that your getting ? if she starts going on , explaine this is how you feel , if there is still problems and she continues doing it, go straight to the boss, tell him she's at it again , and that your work is now being effected by it, not to mention stress , ask for a meeting with him and her.

If that still doesn't sort it, go back to the boss once more , explaine nothign has changed and that if it doesn't get sorted in the next week you will be going to HR about it.

While not shouting at her, you have just handed her ass back to her for her to wear as a hat... it's the best to deal with something like this.

try and remain calm in all the meetings stating facts about the problems , how you spoke to her on the side about it to see if you could sort it out .


other than that, any time she walks into the room , just say " a **** .. it's her again" and get up and walk out ;P

Dellgirl

Just there, she started giving out to me and calling it a disgrace over something that was actually not really anything to do with me directly

This happened to me before when I had just started in a new job. This wench started giving out about another collegues work as though it were my fault that i had not seen a mistake on the document.

I didnt really know what to say so i said I would pass her concerns on. She looked a little strangely at me and then turned arouned to finish her own work. As luck happened the other co-worker passed our desks and i called him over to tell him that x had many concerns about the poor quality and layout of his work...havent you x?.

She went puce and started telling him very politely...well, what i meant was....and side stepping around it so I finished it off by telling him exactly what a disgrace the document was and all she had said. I put it like I was in awe of her wonderfully sharp mind.

She was like a mouse with him and when he left she rounded on me like a witch! I called the co-worker back (who was a superior) and asked him did he mind about the pointing out of the mistake s supposedly made in the document being pointed out to him because x was now unhappy with the situation. Again...really quiet and nice to him. And me in awe of her wonderful handleing of the situation.


She didnt say anything else to me . Needless to say we never became the best of friends .

Its a bit long winded - sorry - what i was trying to say was killing with strong kindness can work sometimes. Dont take any crap from anyone but dont land yourself in the soup either. I used to find it really hard to make a coherent arguement back until I realised i didnt need to argue.

Dellgirl

While not shouting at her, you have just handed her ass back to her for her to wear as a hat... it's the best to deal with something like this.

Mega just done what i was trying to do in 1 sentence!

sutty

There seems to be one of these in every office. I am working with a lad like that at the moment. As it has been discribed, he has waft of "big-shot" about him. After the second week here. (him, myself and two other guys started) He turned around to a boss of ours thats not on site. Saying the 3 of us had "communication issues" Also turning an event that happened between me and him. Into me being rude while he was on the phone to a coustomer.

We are here 2+ months now and NO ONE likes him. Not even the Bosses out here. So trust me when I say. If she is being a bit<h to you, then more than likely she is doing it to others.

Best thing is to make a complante about her to your boss. Let him know what has been happening. Then when ever she starts off on a rant. Tell her to site down and be quite. As the office is not a place to be acting like that. If she has a problem with you. Tell her to take it out-side. She will more than likely shutup at that point. (its worked here)
You Boss will also be supportive of this as I am sure no boss wants two of his employees having a "disagreement" in the office where people are on the phone to clients or other departments.

Also put her in her place. Make it clear that she is not your boss and that she does not have the right to be saying what she is saying to you. What ever you do, do not actively try and get her to blow up at you.

too_much

The only thing that makes me paranoid is that "new person" atmosphere you often get when you start - most of the people I work with are around my age (17 - 21 or so) and obviously they're all really close friends and have a laugh, which kinda leaves me there feeling a bit alienated.

They're all really sound though and I don't thinkg[/b[ I'm gona have any problems with anyone else specifically, but there's always that voice in the back of my head telling me "When you leave, they all talk about you, everyone's gona bitch about you!" but that's my paranoia speaking I guess...

Example, if the head chef keeps on at me, and I went to my boss, I don't wana look like "The new guy who tells the boss on people". Most people I work with have said "aaah bo***cks to him, he's a miserable old bas***d". I really need to adopt the same attitude and just chill, because it stresses me out too much!

Remember mate, stressing over things like that can ruin your whole week (if you're anything like me) so just keep looking at all the positive aspects of your job, and make them outweigh the negatives!

regards,
too_much

Victor

Everyone makes mistakes. Nothing is perfect. We are here on this earth to try to make things better than they are, but we a reunlikely to make them perfect.

Note that most workers complain about (a) senior management (b) middle management (c) their peers (d) their subordinates (e) other departments (f) suppliers (g) customers (h) co-suppliers to customers (i) competitors (j) everyone else in the world not fitting into section a-h.

Or try a more constructive tone. Tell your colleague, that while constructive criticism is welcome, moaning about XYZ isn't very constructive and merely creates tension in the office and that while, yes ABC bugs you too, you would prefer to just get on with your work.

I suspect if you say this in a concillatory manner it may be accepted.

the_syco

Say "meh", and ignore her. If she points something out, say "meh", and ignore her. If she becomes hysterical, say "meh", and go back to work. If she tries to belittle you, say "meh", and ignore her. If she tries to have a polite conversation with you, say "your busy", and ignore her. Continue having good relations with everyone else, and eventually she'll stop annoying you.