Depressed step dad

LegacyUser

hi guys,

wouldnt normally be a fan of posting on public boards but nothing to lose really.
My parents have been sperated since I was just a kid, but a few years ago my mother met a man and they hit it off straight away.
Unfortunatley he didn't have a great background and had some tough calls in his life. His wife died completley unexpectedly, his best friend had died and his best friends son had also taken his own life. All this happened within a few years. But recently he seemed reall really down. He lives with us and he's such a great guy.
But yesterday he just left. Took his passport and went. Left clothes etc and never said anything.
He sent my mother one or two txt messages, telling her that he loved her, but he wouldnt answer his phone, and now its off completley.

I know nobody here can help find him or anything, but was wondering if anyone had experience with people just upping and leaving like this??
Did they come back or get in contact? We're just afraid he'll do something to hurt himself, (although I don't think he would). My mother is so upset and worried.

thanks

LadyJ

I've never had an experience like this I admit and I don't know the exact reason why your step dad may have left. However,perhaps life has become very overwhelming for him. From reading about what he has gone through,it wouldn't surprise me.
He may just need some time to himself and it is very possible that he will return but,not knowing him,I can't say this for sure.
Some people are able to stick around and work through life and the challenges it sets but others run away because it is too much to handle.
And when it comes to life,work or anything,sometimes people just need a breather.
Don't give up on him totally but do get on with life.

drdre

man i am really sorry to hear this story.anyway good luck in tryin to find him and hope hes well and safe

Victor

OK, the worst bit first.

Do talk to the Garda (go in person and bring someone with you) and explain the situation. While they can't list him as missing immediately, telling them sooner rather than later is better. Also contact his doctor(s).

Separately, he may only need some time to himself.

koneko

I agree with Victor. Just putting it on record with the Guardi is a good idea, just in case something happens or he stays away for a long time and you want to pursue it.
Was he seeing a counseller or therapist? If so, it would be good to inform them aswell.

I suspect he probably just needs some time away from everything and everyone to clear his head. A break to sort out his head. Try not to worry about it too much, and all you can really do at the moment is offer your mum support, as I'm sure she's pretty upset at the moment.

shellby

i'm really sorry to hear that
it sounds like he has had a bit of a raw deal in the past couple of years he probably just needed to be completely alone for a while but the others are right make sure you inform the right people