Wicked game type story

Bottle_of_Smoke

Know a girl from work - nice, funny, pretty, so on so forth, bit younger than me but no big deal there.

Anyhow around 8 months ago I get told by one of the other staff that this girl likes me. Wasn't too interested but one night at a party got drunk and didn't think about the consequences. Didn't sleep with her but there was kissing.

For some reason she's just not my cup of tea. I can't see myself falling in love with her(I know her pretty well) so I'm not gonna go out with her. I tell her I'm not interested, she gets pissed off but still texts me all the time, usually random stuff, how's your day etc... Anyway it's still going on, I slipped up a few times around her drunk since(ie scoring her) and I know this was horrible but I can't do anything about it now. Last time anything happened mutually was a few months ago.

Out with work people on wednesday and we end up in a house, she starts coming on to me, (nothing too direct, just stroking with feet and stuff, I certainly wasn't just imagining it though) I just made excuses to go out for a smoke\bathroom everytime it got too heavy.

She hasn't mentioned anything about it and neither have I. Was thinkin now that's she's seen I'm not responding she might stop but no the texts are starting again.

Probably worth mentioning she's 17, I'm 20, and I think she told me she's never liked anyone as much as me.

I know I've gotten myself into this, but we all do things we regret.

The main problem is I'm seeing someone else now. They've seen each other but would never have spoken(if I explained why this just wouldn't be annonymous anymore) I don't think original girl knows.

My issue as such is to tell or not to tell. If I could be sure she'd never find out I think she'd be better off not knowing in the near future. Unfortunately maybe not just the near future. However if I do tell her she might back off. And I wouldn't want her to find out by seeing me hold hands with the new girl walking down the street.

Thanks if you made it to the end, any advice much appreciated.

Larianne

I think you may have lead her on abit. You gotta tell people straight abuot things like this coz if anyway inbetween people will always think 'oh but maybe this, maybe that' etc.

Just tell her that you want to be friends, aplogise if you have lead her on and say you have a girlfriend. obviously you don't have to be blunt but straightforward is the best way!

She's young, she'll get over it.

CaptainPeacock

She sounds like the kind that can't take a hint.

Dizzyblabla

maybe if you don't say it straight out, like "stop coming onto me, I have a new g/f now".. but if you just start talking about this new girl alot, have people ask you how is she when you know that the young girl is around??
You never had anything serious with the young girl, so you don't have to worry about her seeing you with the new girl, but if she does come onto you again, maybe you could say it in a nice way, "I'm seeing someone else". I wouldn't go out of my way to say it straight out to her anyway...

PeadarofAodh

Drop in the fact you have a girlfriend casually but obviously enough so she knows why you're saying it. This should help her move on and make sure there's no awkward moments between her and your girlfriend.
good luck

OLDYELLAR

Dont say anything , show up with the new girlfrend she `ll soon take the hint then , wow lifes a bit*h get over it , nothing worse than people who stalk ya after a few shifts , im sure if she`s still getting fresh with ya the new lady wont have any qualms about putting her straight on who`s interested in who.

Mean I know , but she obviously cant take a hint so go with the sledge hammer approach.

Stench Blossoms

yeh i'd agree with oldyellar on this one.

She's not gonna get the hint until she see's you with someone else..

Don't reply to her text's. But if you feel you have to don't give her a reason to text you back. ie.

her : "hey how r u?"
you : "fine thanks" <---- dont ask her how she is

She'll soon get the hint

OLDYELLAR

Dont reply to her texts at all is even better I think , people usually get the hint after about 5 texts and no replies.

Piste

I know how it feels to lead someone on, you feel all guilty and stuff. Casually drop your girlfriend into conversation so she gets the clear message. Or if she asks to go out say 'Sure, but do you mind if I bring X?'

She should get the hint from that.

tman

ask her if she's up for a 3way with your girlfriend

LundiMardi

*diggin a hole*

Besprechen

you cant blame the girl for everything here, you've gone with her every night youve been drunk, youve given her your mobile no. and then say shes got the wrong idea?
you need to tell her gently next evening you're out from work (no alcohol), and not by dropping your girlfriend into the conversation, thats really just cowardly and would hurt and embarrass her.

Bottle_of_Smoke

Besprechen wrote:

you cant blame the girl for everything here, you've gone with her every night youve been drunk, youve given her your mobile no. and then say shes got the wrong idea?

Sorry, what?

Where the hell did I say that? Oh that's right, you're one of those boards users who reads a few words from a post and makes whatever point they want reguardless of how irrelevent it is to the topic.

Anyway, telling her isn't a problem, just wasn't sure if I should or not. I'm not gonna drop it into conversation, I just think that would be really rude. I'd hate if someone did it to me that way.

Texts have been going on since, I'll prob end up seeing her wednesday and if she says anything I'm gonna tell her there's someone else or that we need to "see other people".

Altheus

Tell her, what are you trying to save, your ego or her heart?

weemcd

PeadarofAodh wrote:

Drop in the fact you have a girlfriend casually but obviously enough so she knows why you're saying it. This should help her move on and make sure there's no awkward moments between her and your girlfriend.
good luck

i find that during a conversation and someone drops in they have a girlfriend to discourage someone else from trying to persue them, that this is the funniest fúcking thing on the planet and burst out laughing any time i hear it.

It's even happened to me before and i cant help but laugh out loud when it has been said.

To get on topic i dont think dropping that in casualy is the right way to go, instead take the girl to one side and tell her straight whats going on and proceed from there, after all you dont want to string her along or have her coming on to you now you have a girlfriend.

Bottle_of_Smoke

Altheus wrote:

Tell her, what are you trying to save, your ego or her heart?

Her heart tbh. What Weemcd said is so true, but in this case cruel rather than funny, gonna go with telling her next time I see her. Cheers guys.

BizzyC

She's 17, she wont be great at picking up hints yet.
You'll have to be brutally honest with her. She's only 17, she'll get over you fairly quickly.

Draupnir

weemcd wrote:

i find that during a conversation and someone drops in they have a girlfriend to discourage someone else from trying to persue them, that this is the funniest fúcking thing on the planet and burst out laughing any time i hear it.

It's even happened to me before and i cant help but laugh out loud when it has been said.

Im exactly the same man, always end up busting my hole laughing.

Kell

Bottle_of_Smoke wrote:

However if I do tell her she might back off. And I wouldn't want her to find out by seeing me hold hands with the new girl walking down the street.

Sorry- am I dumb or what are you trying to achieve here. Do you want her to back off (the rest of your post suggested so) or do you want to have your cake and eat it?

K-

CaptainPeacock

CaptainPeacock wrote:

She sounds like the kind that can't take a hint.

in fairness, sleeping with her may have confused her a bit. no offence to BOS. Got into a similar situation when this girl i got talking to on a night out started texting me. Turns out she was smitten. i hadnt realised then she was a bit younger then i thought and it would have been unsavoury for anything to happen but nothing happened anyway except one night i got pissed and agreed over a text to 'meet her' as we say down here. Realised what i done next day and slowly backed out of it and cut all contact with the girl. It was cruel and im not proud of myself but i would have definatley had something to be ashamed of had anything happened. If things had have been different i may have said yeah but wrong time wrong place and i dont have any regrets

weemcd

Draupnir wrote:

Im exactly the same man, always end up busting my hole laughing.

i dont think it can be done in any subtle way, me shouting "shot down!" may not help

*Page*

Hints do not work!

Tell her that your sorry that past times you have gotten carried away and gone further than you would have liked.
Tell her about your new gf.(or just say that you have started seeing someone and you dont want anyone to get hurt)

LadyJ

Deleted User wrote:

in fairness, sleeping with her may have confused her a bit. no offence to BOS.

He hasn't slept with her he said.
Well BOS,you know my view on this one,just tell her. It'll spare her feelings any further in the long run. You've made no committment to the girl and, although you've been silly and selfish with the whole drunken kissing crap,you must remember this,a kiss is just a kiss!
Tell her so she can move on and try to make you jealous with some randomer!

Ha,it might even work too! You always seem to want what you can't have.
Tell her but on your own head be it when she pretends to have a new "hobby" and you start to find her irresistable once more!

LadyJ

LadyJ wrote:

He hasn't slept with her he said.
Well BOS,you know my view on this one,just tell her. It'll spare her feelings any further in the long run. You've made no committment to the girl and, although you've been silly and selfish with the whole drunken kissing crap,you must remember this,a kiss is just a kiss!
Tell her so she can move on and try to make you jealous with some randomer!

Ha,it might even work too! You always seem to want what you can't have.
Tell her but on your own head be it when she pretends to have a new "hobby" and you start to find her irresistable once more!

sorry. thought when he said he 'scored' her that he had. my mistake. Kissing can be as bad though in fairness. yeah i agree, let her down gently though. make her feel nice but just not meant to be. easier said than done