Sticky Situation.....

LegacyUser

Theres this girl, right........

Basically, she has a history with a guy I know and after they slept together they fell out, and now they hate each other. He told us after that she also slept with another bloke he knew who caught an STI off her.

Now, recently we've been gettin close. It seems only a matter of time before we hook up but I'd kinda be put off if she was riddled to bits with diseases . I'm curious to whether or not my mate made up the STI story or whether she does in fact have 1/2/3/4/5 etc! (thats a joke by the way, i doubt she has more than 1 )

So the current situation is that my mate and her HATE each other. I think that if he knew about all the flirtin etc that was goin on, he'd be quite pissed, so shaggin this one would cause a lot of tension between us, possibly leading to a falling out over her (which happened with HIS ex best mate since he start goin out with HER best mate, confused?). Basically, I'm worried that if I get with her I'll lose a long time friend & POSSIBLY catch something.

Now the way I see it, i have 4 options:

1. Just Do It, wear a condom, dont go down on her & ask questions later,
2. Dont get with her ever, just stay friends with her & your mate to be safe,
3. Ask her just before/during sex if she's "infected" (mood killer),
4. Ask her before you get together in the first place (she'll probably deck me).

suppose a mod can add in extra options if need be.

IF we do get together, due to the fact that I have a close circle of friends, chances are he'll find out about us. Also, my mates keep encouraging us to get together & makin jokes about us gettin together when we're drinkin together, for example, she was sittin beside me and a mate mentioned that he thinks we should hook up, to which she replies "Im not that drunk...yet!", there does be other similar exchanges such as : ME "ah no drink left...except that wine in there", HER: "ah, wine, my one weakness ", ME MATES: "ooooh u hear that" etc etc. so my mates have also accepted that its only a matter of time and they're not great for keeping secrets. I wouldnt tell them to keep this secret either!

If I go up to hers for more "house-partying" without a concrete decision of what to do, I know I'll just get drunk, let the little (big ) man take over & get with her without thinking.

Any advice? sorry for long post, felt I needed to explain fully.

ps shes quite hot also, I have to admit!

Nuttzz

he fell out with her, he hates her and now claims to have got an std from her, of course he did...... :rolleyes:

so after you "do it" you're going to "ask questions later"? I can picture the scene, lying in bed, having a post sex ciggie, you roll over and say "bob says your riddled"

Kingp35

Nuttzz wrote:

I can picture the scene, lying in bed, having a post sex ciggie, you roll over and say "bob says your riddled"

Haha nice.

Seriusly do you actually like this girl or just wanna shag her?(sounds like the latter to me)
My advice stay the hell away you could lose a best friend and possibly catch a disease for the sake of a shag. No contest im afraid

annR

You sound like a horny guy who wants to shag some girl who sounds like she'd be on for it. I have never heard of any guy in this situation deciding that it would be a bad idea and 'abstaining'. Would it matter that much to your mate whether you shagged her or not? Sounds like it's just a load of casual shagging to me so why would he have much of a problem with it.

zefer

Nuttzz wrote:

so after you "do it" you're going to "ask questions later"? I can picture the scene, lying in bed, having a post sex ciggie, you roll over and say "bob says your riddled"

LMAO


as the ad says, "Just do it"

Chucky the tree

it could turn into a scabby situation.


Steer clear.

Third_Echelon

She sounds like a bit of a ho to be honest.... no doubt she's riddled from the sound of things.

I wouldn't risk an STI over a ride... Is it really worth it?

airetam_storm

Third_Echelon wrote:

She sounds like a bit of a ho to be honest.... no doubt she's riddled from the sound of things.

I wouldn't risk an STI over a ride... Is it really worth it?

Wouldnt you think the mate is just pissed so he's making her out to be riddled?

Chucky the tree

airetam_storm wrote:

Wouldnt you think the mate is just pissed so he's making her out to be riddled?

Does he really want to take that risk?

Altheus

What is the STI? Unfortunately people sometimes make up vicious rumours about contracting STIs when they develop problems, or witness problems downstairs. I personally say ask her about it.

Dizzyblabla

Chances are he wouldn't have known he caught it from her unless she told him she had it, by which point she's already had it seen to by a doctor? a guess on my part... but that would be the standard practice, no?

Third_Echelon

Chucky the tree wrote:

Does he really want to take that risk?

thats more what i was getting at... i wouldn't risk it... it could be true you never know..

aidan_walsh

Dizzyblabla wrote:

Chances are he wouldn't have known he caught it from her unless she told him she had it

How the hell do you figure that?

Dizzyblabla

With some you don't even know you have them, and surely if a girl had one and knew about it, she'd do something about it?? no? Unless she doesn't even know she has an STI and is passing it around....

Piste

Do you want a relationship with this girl or are you just looking for a quick shag? If it's the latter, don't risk losing your friendship over it. If you actually would like a relationship with her go for it, but explain to your mate that you really like her.

melekalikimaka

well this girl appeas to be putting out with ease...so even if it wasnt from the bloke, may other situations may have resulted in a STI being parked into tunatown

claireoby

Chucky the tree wrote:

it could turn into a scabby situation.


Steer clear.

Here here!!

seriously tho...are you actually real mates with this guy? would u care if he never talked to you again? if not then go for it....but if you actually do care...which i think u do coz u put this post up..(ie your conscious says u sudnt, your dick says u shud) man dont shag her...i voted that u shudnt anyway....even ur dick shud b against this one with the risk of infection involved!

*Page*

first i've a question or two for you..

Q1: would you have or have you had unprotected sex with anyone?
Q2: have you been tested for STI/D's?

Dont lable the girl until you know. If you are close then why not ask her about her sexual history. Any person I've ever slept with has been asked about there sexual history.

Never sleep with anyone with out protection(not just birth control).

If she did have an STI then it could have been from him not her. Just because he found out he had something (which can take months to be detected) doesnt mean it came from her. He may just be blaming the last person on his list!

Best thing to do is talk to her.

also you can get protection for going down on people too...(get thee to a chemist or adult shop)

Einstein

Don't go there man, worst thing that can happen is having a girl come between you and a mate.

They aint worth it, decent mates are hard to find.

Karma

*Page* wrote:

first i've a question or two for you..
Q1: would you have or have you had unprotected sex with anyone?
Q2: have you been tested for STI/D's?
Dont lable the girl until you know. If you are close then why not ask her about her sexual history. Any person I've ever slept with has been asked about there sexual history.
Never sleep with anyone with out protection(not just birth control).
If she did have an STI then it could have been from him not her. Just because he found out he had something (which can take months to be detected) doesnt mean it came from her. He may just be blaming the last person on his list!
Best thing to do is talk to her.
also you can get protection for going down on people too...(get thee to a chemist or adult shop)

Page has good points to listen to.:cool:

A easy way to bring it up in conversation(yes, its posible) is mention that you are off for a checkup in a clinic due to a previous female friend getting in touch with you (as she caught something???) and you are off to for a check up(not a bad thing to do if you have not got one yet!) Clamydia, would be interesting...:eek:
sorry for the bad spelling-off for coffee.
regards
Karma.

Boggles

Nuttzz wrote:

he fell out with her, he hates her and now claims to have got an std from her, of course he did...... :rolleyes:

so after you "do it" you're going to "ask questions later"? I can picture the scene, lying in bed, having a post sex ciggie, you roll over and say "bob says your riddled"

Brilliant!!!

Dave

Divers wrote:

Don't go there man, worst thing that can happen is having a girl come between you and a mate.

They aint worth it, decent mates are hard to find.

Best advice anyone can be given. Now if only I knew that a few years ago.

The_B_Man

i voted you should shag her! your only young once & im sure your mate wont mind as he probably wasnt that close to her either. for all you know, he probably was just friends with her to get the shag too! just wear a johnny and give her socks! unless of course you have stimulating conversations with her!! :rolleyes: