Getting an engagement ring

LegacyUser

Ok folks, I need some advice from those in the know about engagement rings!!

I am planning on getting engaged to my girlfriend and I want to get a ring but I have no idea where to start. I know absolutely nothing about rings, diamonds and the like!! I don't want to ask family and friends cos I don't want them to know anything until we are engaged, would like to keep it a surprise. So here I am asking the kind people of boards for advice!!

What jewellers would you recommend (I'm in Dublin). The only jewellers I know of that do engagement rings are the Happy Ring House in O'Connell street but I don't want to stand like a pratt in the middle of O'Connell street staring blankly into the window!! I also don't want to go into a jewellers not knowing what I am even looking for and have some sales person sell me a piece of crap for a fortune!!

I heard about real and fake diamonds. Do most people go for the real deal? Is there much of a difference?

How much should I expect to pay? I was thinking of about 2K. Am I way off the mark?

Another thing worrying me is what if my gf doesn't like the ring!! Do you think it would be a better idea if we both go together and choose something she likes? The only thing about doing it what way is I know she will go for something cheaper cos she would not like me spending a fortune (we have to save for a mortgage and all). So in one way I'd rather buy the ring myself. I dunno which way is best. If you're a guy tell me what you did and if you are a girl tell me if you would rather your bf surprise you with a ring or would you prefer choose it yourself (by surprise I mean she knows we will get married, etc, we talked about it, so it will not be a huge surprise for her!!).

Ok, that's it for now. Thanks for your advice in advance. I'm sure I will be replying with lots more questions.

nlgbbbblth

Breretons O'Connell St was where we went

don't buy it yourself ; go together and let her choose.

Now in Soaps men will always surprise the woman with the ring. Then again, they will also have their stag the night BEFORE the wedding :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

tinkerbell

The Happy Ring House looks awful. Never been in the place but the words "engagement" and "neon sign" don't really work in the same sentence! What kind of a good jewellers would have a neon sign for the name of the place?

If you go to a good jewellers, they won't sell you a piece of crap for a fortune. They will sell you a good quality diamond for a fortune!

Don't know much about buying engagement rings but I do know the jewellers here - last year, my nana gave me money to buy a piece of jewellery for my 21st, so I visited a lot of places (I wanted to get a diamond bracelet). I found the best places to be on Jeweller's Row off Grafton Street, so maybe you should try around there for a ring for your missus.

Why don't you do a bit of research yourself on diamonds before you go, so you have an idea what you want (4 Cs - Cut, Clarity, Carat, Colour).

I wouldn't really think it's a good idea to buy it yourself unless you know exactly what type of a ring she wants, you'd probably be better off getting her to come with, after all - she will be wearing it on her finger for the rest of her life so she has to like it!

0utshined

Any decent jewellers should be able to sort you out. They'll bring you into a private room out back or above the shop and show you a selection of rings to choose from. It's said that you should be spending two months salary on the ring but I don't know where that originates from.

The previous two posters have suggested you bring your GF with you but I presume you want to surprise her in which case don't worry about it, you more than likely know her tastes at this stage and if not then agree with the jeweller that you may need to exchange it in a week or two.

KlodaX

you'd probably be better off getting her to come with, after all - she will be wearing it on her finger for the rest of her life so she has to like it!

agreed. You could book a viewing with the jewellers and ask them to have all the engagement rings available that are 2k or under... then propose to her and if she says yes then say great we pick the ring on whatever day you have booked. If she says no then you have no ring to return! :eek: sorry ... she won't say no... it will be fine!

You might be best to ask her friend ... if ye have a mutual friend even better!... to tip toe around her asking about jewellery and then work engagement rings into the conversation to see what she comes out with.

Best of luck... I hope it goes well for you.

Talliesin

The Happy Ring House is better on the inside than it is on the outside.

Any decent jewellers will take you aside and discuss the rings for engagement with you (they will also do this with wedding rings). These people sell high-value items and will treat you really nice now because they want to be the first place you think of when you buy birthday and wedding anniversary presents. Even if you don't have much of a budget they'll treat you nice now because they are also selling the really expensive thing you buy for your 40th wedding anniversary when you have more money. It's therefore not in their interests to rip you off. At the time my wife and I bought our wedding rings we were pretty broke and on a very low budget, but we still got great service.

Now if you ask me, diamonds are a fraud perpetuated by De Beers, they are over-priced crap as far as gems go and the dreadful resale price shows this. I think just about every other real gem is nicer, but unless your beloved has stated interests in unusual jewelry or the political implications of the diamond trade then you want to go for a diamond ring in a simple clean design with good colour to the diamond, but avoiding current diamond fads (I think pink diamonds are the current engagement bling of choice, expect them to look dreadfully dated in 10 years time).

Make sure you buy the wedding rings in the same quality of gold as the engagement ring, or else wearing the two together will cause the lower-quality gold to wear the higher quality away (put a 9ct next to a 18ct and the 18ct will be ruined in no time). Again, a jeweller will advise you about this.

WhiteWashMan

as always, id advise letting your partner pick her own ring. after all, she is the one that is going to wear it every day.
sure, its lovely to get engaged with a big shiney diamond (or so they tell me), but its not about the ring.
if you feel the need to have something nice to propse with, think about buying a wedding ring to propose with, and then let her choose her own engagement ring. at lest if she is not to gone on the wedding ring, it isnt too expensive to replace!

on the other hand, if you set up a nice situation with brekkie in bed, flowers and make it really nice and romantic, i doubt she will care if you give her a hula hoop to propose with.
but the only thing i would say is that i would let her pick her own engagement ring

WhiteWashMan

oh, and we got our engagment ring from michael perry in the powerstown centre.
in fact, ive bought a lot of jewellery from there. its really nice

CathyMoran

Let her choose the ring - I was engaged in the past and the guy got a ring specially made for me which was incredibly romantic, but I still felt left out of the whole process - we had been engaged for two months before he gave me the ring so there was time to get it together.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the advice so far everyone. Very useful. Keep it coming...

:-)

nutzboutstuff2

Well my boyfriend proposed and then we got the ring together. I really liked it cause i got to pick it and he set a lower limit so i had to get one higher than that! We went to Fields on Henry Street and they couldn't have been better, had 5 of them fussing around us! They also gave us a frequent buyers card which gets you discounts and gave us 100 off so he could take me for dinner! Will remember it forever. They also have a back room you can go into and they'll spend ages showing you everything and letting you try them on. Also gotta be careful cause if she's not there you might come out with the wrong size and will then have to bring it back to get it resized. Imagin how upset she would be if she had to say her ring was in getting resized when she's telling everyone about it! I'd definatly bring her!!

riskky

JohnnyBoy--- wrote:

Thanks for the advice so far everyone. Very useful. Keep it coming...

:-)

Try APPLEBY Jewellers,Johnsons court Grafton street.Nice interior,personalised service and lovely girls.They have private viewing rooms and u get all your questions answered.Should u decide to buy,u get discounts and a priviledge card offering more discounts so u can come back and blow more money :cool:

Santa Claus

The service in Applebys is very good but their prices do tend to be on the steep side !

LegacyUser

How much am I looking at for a half decent ring?

babaduck

JohnnyBoy--- wrote:

How much am I looking at for a half decent ring?

It's the old "piece of string" question... The metal has a bearing on the final cost

Yellow gold is the cheapest

White gold is yellow gold plated with Rhodium so it looks like platinum. Can be a false economy as it needs to be replated every year or 2 years depending on how the ring wears (I have a white gold diamond eternity ring & it's looking a wee bit shabby after a year at the back of the band)

Platinum is the most expensive metal - very durable & dulls down over time from a really bright finish to a lovely mellowed tone.

Both my e-ring & wedding ring are platinum, as is the husband's wedding ring. I picked it because I don't like yellow gold - it doesn't suit me, and it does work out better value in the long term than white gold, although there's a significant cost difference starting out.

Then you have the stone - the larger the bling, the more it costs. I think your budget of €2k should get you a gorgeous ring - mine didn't cost more than that, it's a 1/4 carat diamond in a 4mm platinum band which is a very modern setting.

I'd also recommend bringing your fiancee with you - I had a picture of "the ring" in my head & when I tried it on, the damn thing didn't suit me! In fact, my ring was the one I hated on sight... I can recommend Ernest Jones as being very straight to deal with, there's room for bargaining if you're of a persuasive nature. Yes, I did haggle for my own e-ring!!! Also if you fancy a trip up north, we bought our wedding rings from Jack Murphys in Newry and a more knowledgeable and fair gentleman you couldn't find.

Good luck (and don't forget to ask her parents for permission to marry their daughter - it's MAJOR bonus brownie points!!!)

Victor

babaduck wrote:

Good luck (and don't forget to ask her parents for permission to marry their daughter - it's MAJOR bonus brownie points!!!)

I plan to marry a woman - not a girl, while I may give notice, I won't ask permission.

babaduck

Victor wrote:

I plan to marry a woman - not a girl, while I may give notice, I won't ask permission.

Ah Victor, don't be so dogmatic... it can pay for your wedding you know

Talliesin

babaduck wrote:

Good luck (and don't forget to ask her parents for permission to marry their daughter - it's MAJOR bonus brownie points!!!)

If anyone asked permission to marry one of my daughters (assuming this is a few years down the line) I'd say no. I don't want them marrying some wimpy stuffed-shirt who is asking completely the wrong person about the matter.

angeldelight

Unless you're absolutely sure you know what she likes, as in she's pointed out engagement-type rings to you in the past go together! You don't have to have the ring with you when you ask her, it's the question and answer that matters most. It must be horrible to end up with a ring you don't like, and even if you say "tell me if you don't like it" she might not cause she doesn't want to hurt your feelings!

As for asking my parents before a guy proposed, I'd be furious. I'd want the excitement of having the girly chat with my mum and surprising her by showing her the ring etc

Einstein

PLatinum rings are the dogs danglies, and the happy ring house is a great spot to go. Also Hugh Stathams in naas is a really classy little place, he'll design a ring for you from scratch! But i agree, bring her with you, better to let her choose!

cuckoo

In my proposal day dream the guy has a gaudy plastic ring that we both giggle over as he slides it onto my finger after surprising me with the question.

Then, we go shopping together for the 'real' ring - maybe to one of those places in the Powerscourt Centre where we can get the ring designed.

But, the plastic ring will always be kept tucked safely away, for me to take out once in a while and get mushy over.

However, nowhere in the day dream does he approach my parents for permission to request my hand in marriage - and if he did, he'd regret it as my father would probably call his bluff out of devilment and sit him down to grill him about his 'prospects' and to impress on him the importance of his daughter wearing pure white on the wedding day.

secret_squirrel

cuckoo wrote:

In my proposal day dream the guy has a gaudy plastic ring that we both giggle over as he slides it onto my finger after surprising me with the question.

Then, we go shopping together for the 'real' ring - maybe to one of those places in the Powerscourt Centre where we can get the ring designed.

But, the plastic ring will always be kept tucked safely away, for me to take out once in a while and get mushy over.

Thats always been my plan when proposing - what do ya say - shall we do it??

Victor

cuckoo wrote:

In my proposal day dream the guy has a gaudy plastic ring

See-through day-glo green with a pink flower?

DublinWriter

There's another thread on here somewhere on engagement rings, I think the OP was thinking of going to Antwerp to buy the ring.

Some of the smaller Dublin jewellers are a a rip. Earnest Jones in Grafton St/Blanchardstown Centre are the best in terms of value.

Go with the classic solitare if possible, avoid the cheaper cluster types.

babaduck

angeldelight wrote:

As for asking my parents before a guy proposed, I'd be furious. I'd want the excitement of having the girly chat with my mum and surprising her by showing her the ring etc

We had decided to get engaged & had the ring bought before my husband asked my dad. We called into my parents & he grabbed my dad & I grabbed my mum to keep her quiet until they emerged from the sitting room... and then we told them both

flikflak

The "Proper" thing to do is to ask then go and get the ring together. TV and films are probably to blame for people thinking they have to ask with ring in hand.

Dinxminx

I really like the gaudy plastic ring idea... How cute! So much sweeter than the down-on-bended-knee-all-serious-and-solemn idea!

fdevine

I'm married seven years now, but I still remember the day we went to Applebys, off Grafton Street to pick the ring....

As others have said, if you let her pick the ring she is guaranteed to like it.

If you have a budget in mind, or a style, the people in Applebys will display everything that suits. There is no pressure at all and the staff are A1.

You will be whisked off to a private room and treated like the most important people in the world.

I would imagine you should get a really nice ring for 2K. Ours was £500 at the time.

Best of Luck

tabatha

the first thing you have to do is find out if she wears gold or silver. if gold get a 18ct. if silver go for platimun. i cant believe that no one has mentioned the four c's of buying a diamond. they are colour, cut, clarity, and caret. caret meaning the size or weight of the diamond is the least important. the most important is colour. with the exception of coloured diamonds the less colour a diamond has the more expensive it is. a d, e, f, are colourless diamonds. ireland do tend to charge to much for diamonds. america is your best bet for buying a good cheap diamond. i got mine in tiffanys in new york. they have engagement rings that start from 800 dollars there. they also only sell very high grade diamonds all with certs. appleby's off grafton street are good. just remember colour is the most important but factor in the rest.

0utshined

tabatha wrote:

i cant believe that no one has mentioned the four c's of buying a diamond. they are colour, cut, clarity, and caret.

tinkerbell wrote:

Why don't you do a bit of research yourself on diamonds before you go, so you have an idea what you want (4 Cs - Cut, Clarity, Carat, Colour).

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the advice people.

Decided to take the advice here and I'll do the proposal first and we'll both go choose the ring. Will let you know how I get on

tabatha

0utshined wrote:

looks like you "outshined" me

DublinWriter

tabatha wrote:

i got mine in tiffanys in new york. they have engagement rings that start from 800 dollars there. they also only sell very high grade diamonds all with certs. appleby's off grafton street are good.

Myself and the fiance saw a stunning Tiffany ring in Weirs, it was a 1CT, classic mounting and flawless clarity.

Flawless price too - 20K.

Thankfully, I had an idea of what the fiance wanted from a bit of joint shopping around, and was able to my it myself, and surprise her with the grand gesture when she least expected it. There's nothing as romantic as a (nice!) surprise.

No, I didn't get the Tiffany, as I think she'd be a nervous wreck walking around with 20K's worth of rock on her hand. What I got was cheaper (not much), but still didn't break the bank.

cuckoo

DublinWriter wrote:

No, I didn't get the Tiffany, as I think she'd be a nervous wreck walking around with 20K's worth of rock on her hand. What I got was cheaper (not much), but still didn't break the bank.

That's a good point. I have some 'nice' (ie kinda expensive) jewellery that i never really wear because i'm afraid of losing it. I'd rather an engagement ring that i liked the look of than an expensive one.

tabatha

weirs dont do tiffany anymore cause they were charging way to much i think! anyway, tiffany in new york is so much cheaper. the only reason why it is worth so much here is the name. that adds value. plus remember you are also getting more for the dollar so you are making back a load too.

bandraoi

Go to Oasis - they have pretty, sparkly and cheap rings that come in a little box that will do for the whole proposal bit but only cost E10 - E20.
Propose with that.

LegacyUser

I bought my fiance's engagement ring three years ago in McDowells Jewellers on O'Connell street. I was seriously impressed with the selction of rings on offer and the level of service. I was a bit nervous heading in as I didnt have an exact ring in mind but the lady talked me through the whole process- non conflict, the 4 C's etc. Having been given a hefty discount I was assured I could change the ring no problem if she did not like it, and sizing was free along with a plate and polish a few years down the line. Highly recommended!!!

dubdcugirly

My bro took my advice when proposing - myself and his now fiancee have Sweetie Bracelets from Links of London - one of the charms available is a mini engagement ring he proposed with that and had the booking with the jewellers arranged for the next day - loved it!

Blackpitts

Johnnyboy--- wrote: »

Thanks for all the advice people.

Decided to take the advice here and I'll do the proposal first and we'll both go choose the ring. Will let you know how I get on

i've done the same.
I proposed with a fake ring then we went shopping together, so she picked the one she liked.
First of all lear what the 4Cs are, then consider the idea to buy a cheap ryanair flight to Antwerp (holland) where you can get a better ring for the money you want to spend.

p.s. i bought mine in NYC and made a very great deal

denhaagenite

Blackpitts wrote: »

i've done the same.
I proposed with a fake ring then we went shopping together, so she picked the one she liked.
First of all lear what the 4Cs are, then consider the idea to buy a cheap ryanair flight to Antwerp (holland) where you can get a better ring for the money you want to spend.

p.s. i bought mine in NYC and made a very great deal

Great idea but remember that Antwerp is in Belgium. Nice trip but make sure you book a flight to the right country!! Ryanair do a flight to Brussels Charleroi and Antwerp is easy to get to from there

Zaph

Please don't resurrect 5 year old threads