The Ex from Hell

Riamfada

This thread is more of a personal rant than a personal issue. Things I wanna get off my chest and see what people think.

Some time ago , my girlfriend of 1yr 8mths decided we should take a " break". She called me the next day and told me it was over as she needed space, time and all the rest. Understandingly I said of course. Take all the time yu need. And we were still friends. Rumors circulated that she was "with" somone and when I asked her she denied this. With a bit of persistance it turned out to be a friend of mine. Over the next month I came to realise that this had been going on for some time. Before we broke up. Well all hell broke loose. And people were put in the middle.

The girl it seems turned out to have a very vicious streak. A close friend of mine whom she never cared for was given a ring with is dead mothers initials on it. My ex had never bought a thoughtful gift in her life.

Should I give her Cd's back? Should I "wack" em both? If i see her out Im overcome with rage ( and thats not like me ).

I have been very confused and this resulted in me failing most of my mock exams in march.

Thanks for Reading
grimes

seamus

Find a good mate or a few good mates who aren't affected by her. Go away for the whole summer and forget about her.

joejoem

something simialar (very simialar) happend to me a few years ago. The best thing you can do is walk away from her and the "friend" and never look back. You will just torment yourself by letting it go on. Both of them are obviously not worth it. I would advise you to break all contact because any attempt at conversation will most likely end in an argument or worse.

Sorry to hear man.

meditraitor

Sorry to say the only solution is time, make a clean break from her, burn the cds(in a fire) and move on, sure it will be hard but time will deal with it...

Oh-- good luck in the exams dude,,, way more important than some slag who go's off with one of your mates...

M

Fudger

dont bother with her again, not worth it. Sell her Cd's you nutter and go drinking with the money !

sprinkles

Ok.

First of all calm down.

Lets put the wacking idea to the back of the queue, shall we. Now, your gf broke up with you under the guise of "taking a break" and it turned out she was seeing a friend of your. Is this the friend she gave the ring to? When did his mother die? Is this a crucial piece of information?

I had something similar happen to me about 2 years ago and to be honest it still hurts but tim eis making it easier. As for failing you exams I found that having my college finals that year actually helped me in a way. It took my mind off the situation and I found myself studying more so I wouldn't have to think about it.

There is no quick solution to getting over something like this. Get out and enjoy yourself. Another girl will def take you mind off it but it will never go away for good. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear, but it took me a while to figure it out.

And I think Seamus has the right idea.

Good luck!

Alanna

Pretty much exactly the same thing happened to me but it was nearly ten years ago. I got very depressed and just couldn't get my head around the betrayal of my friend and my boyfriend. It took me ages to get over it, but I did, and you will.

Try to think of it as a fast way of editing two useless, unkind people out of your life. Don't put people in the middle, they don't feel the same way as you and it is not their fault but good friends will be supportive of you.

I used to wonder if I had have just whacked the pair of them I may have felt better for standing up for myself but actually with hindsight, I know that I behaved with dignity and I'm proud of that. Steer clear of them and your social circle if they are still around. Think about going away for the summer, study hard and be a success in life, it is the best revenge. Good luck and don't worry you will feel better eventually.

bragan

Same thing happened to me a few years ago.We broke up under guise of a break, and i found out he was already seeing my best mate.

Semaus is right, a clean break is the only way forward. i tried to remain friends with the people involved, but it didn't work. just ended up making things alot worse, as the more i tried to forget, the more i really hated them.

Riamfada

sprinkles wrote:

turned out she was seeing a friend of your. Is this the friend she gave the ring to? When did his mother die? Is this a crucial piece of information?

It was a long time ago. I just threw it in because she never really counted this lad a friend until all this came up. He is the best friend of her new fella however. And he ( ring friend ) stopped talking to me over this also as a result of her "thoughfulness and kindness" . Incidentally she met his ( ring lad's) girlfiriend infront of everyone the other week and when he got upset she told him to get over it. But thats neither here nor there.

Thanks for all that advice. In a space of only 10 minutes it has helped alot.
Am looking forward to the summer. And hopefully a life outside Dublin!!
Grimes

Bootgal

similar situation is going on in my life.My best guy friend, him and his girlfriend broke up, and then he found out that when they were going out she was with one of his best mates. He is doing his leaving cert at the moment too- he is a mess over it! And she keeps appearing everywhere, every night we go out, she had he cheek to call into his house one day for a chat! The only solution we could think of is to get him away for the summer (as someone suggested earlier on), just to get far away from everything and enjoy himself. So we are all heading off to Barcelona for two months- bring it on!!!

Third_Echelon

I can't believe nobody has suggested typedefing her sister!!!

Seriously dude. Karma will come back and get them!

Forget about her and burn her cds! People will say it's childish, but you'll feel great!

CyberGhost

Third_Echelon wrote:

Forget about her and burn her cds! People will say it's childish, but you'll feel great!

lol you know it's true, and you have every right.

arbeitsscheuer

Third_Echelon wrote:

Seriously dude. Karma will come back and get them!

Concur. When you've been stabbed in the back by the worst kind of people on the planet, know this...

WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND.

I feel for ya man, I really do. But what you have to tell yourself is that you are better off without them, and be happy that you don't have to deal with their sh*t anymore, because you've now realised what kind of cr*ppy ppl they are.

You're too nice a person to have this sh*t happen to ya, mate. But move on.
Pass your exams.

Good luck.